Here? Now? My first reaction was panic. My second was more panic.
Or not, he added drily. I could feel his arms loosening on me. Im used to terrifying people, but not about something like this.
I tightened my grip on him, forcing him to stay with me. Its just thatwell, Ive never Be quiet! He blinked down at me with a little confusion and a whole lot of incredulity.
Are you trying to tell me that youve never been kissed?
I pressed my tongue to the roof of my mouth. He looked so dubious, and his tone had bordered on insulting. Yeah. So?
So, Im shocked, thats all. Youreyou.
In-sul-ting. Me? I asked stiffly.
Yeah. Hot, he said.
Wait. Me? Hot?
He laughed down at me. No ones told you that, either, have they?
I could only shake my head.
Youve clearly been hanging around idiots. His gaze loweredand stayedon my lips, and he lost his gleam of amusement. Im going to kiss you, Ali.
Here? Now? I thought again, my panic returning and my brain short-circuiting. But I might be bad at it, and we dont know each other very well, and you dont And I dont And we cant The words rushed from me, but nothing came out fully formed.
Apparently I do. And you will. And we can. With that, he lowered his head, meshed his lips against mine and stole my breath.
In a snap, there was only Cole, this moment, his mouthhis taste. Mint and cherries. His heat, enveloping me. His strength, surrounding me. Caging me as if we were back in that grocery store parking lot, the Jeep behind me. I gave myself up to the sensations, lost track of everything but Cole.
He must have lost track of everything but me, too, because the tone of the kiss changed from eager and curious to flat-out ravenous. He devoured me, and I did the same to him. My hands roamed over his back, my nails scraping at him. I was inexperienced, yes, but just like in the visions he knew exactly what he was doing.
This was consumingdrugging. He made me feel, without any kind of filter. For so long Id wanted my life to be nothing more than a dream. Now, with emotions and sensations flooding me, I wanted this reality. And I wanted to stay in the safety and intensity of his arms. I wanted to give him everything. Here, now. Want, want, want. Want to touch him, more of him. Want his shirt off. I reached for the hem.
He reached for the hem of my shirt.
Then, suddenly, Cole was gone.
Wait. Come back, I demanded, a strange fog filling my head.
Voices, at a distance. Couldnt decipher them.
My ears were ringing, I realized. Trembling, panting, I tried to focus on what was happening around me. First person I noticed as Frosty. He must have jerked Cole away from me, because he now stood between us, holding out his arms to widen the distance. His mouth was moving. He was speaking, but I couldnt understand him.
A dancer bumped into me, and I stumbled to the side. A scowling girl shoved me into someone else. I tripped, hit the floor. Watching me go down enraged Cole. He tried to get to me, but Frosty stopped him. Of course, that caused his rage to transfer to Frosty. Cole pulled back his elbow, his hand fisted, ready to smash into his friends face.
Bronx moved behind Cole and wrapped big arms around his chest in a bear hug, holding him immobile. Cole struggled to tear free, and would have succeeded, since he was clearly the strongest of the three, but then the other boy, the one whod been dancing with Reeve, joined the fray.
Thankfully, the fog in my mind thinned and the ringing in my ears faded. The world swooped back into focus. Like a flash flood of heat, my entire body nearly erupted into flames. Id just kissed a boy in front of everyone in the club. And I hadnt just kissed him, Id devoured him.
Another trait Id inherited from my dad. A few times, when my parents had thought Emma and I were in our rooms, theyd gone at it that intenselyand Id promptly prayed someone would scrub my corneas with sandpaper and my mind with bleach.
Kat appeared at my side and helped me to my feet. Whats going on? she asked, as stupefied as I was.
I dont know. Id only meant to kiss him back, to compare vision with reality. Id planned to stop after a minutemaybe two. And now, Frosty was glaring daggers at me, as if Id stabbed Cole in the heart and laughed while he bled out. Im sorry. I didnt mean for this to happen. Inch by inch I backed away from him. Our Q and A could wait. I was gonna pretend I hadnt enacted three rules tonight and run.
Ali. Coles attention zeroed in on me. Suddenly I was a target, the gimpy gazelle to his hungry lion. Dont you dare take off.
Im sorry, I repeated. I had to get out of here. Now.
Shaking off Kats hold, I whirled around and pushed my way through the still-writhing bodies on the dance floor. A strobe light tossed out beams of pink, blue and yellow. Where I would goand how I could get thereI wasnt sure. I was miles from home, and there was no way Id walk in the dark.
This is becoming a very bad habit, Cole growled, suddenly keeping pace beside me. His arm wrapped around my waist. You run, I chase.
I couldnt bring myself to look at him. His expression might break me. We cant do that again, I said. Ever.
Why?
I noticed he didnt have to ask what I was talking about. As you so eloquently pointed out in the forest, I dont know you, and you dont know me, but we almostyou knowin public!
You know. Thats what you call it?
Was that amusement in his tone? Do you want me to punch you in the face?
No, I want you to be still and listen to me.
Thats not happening.
He sighed, a wary sound. Even if I promise not to you know in public again?
No, I snapped, and I wasnt sure whether I was happy or ticked by his easy assurance.
Come on, Ill take you home. He linked our fingers and stalked ahead of me, leading the way. Everyone parted as though he was Moses and they were the sharks in the Red Sea.
Im not going home.
Even better.
Outside, warm night air relaxed me. Not the heat so much, but the fresh, clean scent. No perfumes or sweat lingered in the breeze, and I was able to breathe deeply, savor. Cole never slowed. He just plowed ahead, towardhis Jeep. Hed parked at the end of the lot, under a streetlight, angled so that he had a straight shot onto the road. The top and doors had not been replaced.
Ill leave with you, I said, but I cant be gone long.
Fine.
So why was Frosty upset with me?
A pause. Then Youre a wild card, and we dont know exactly what to make of you. Plus, Im supposed to exercise caution when dealing with you, yet several times already Ive acted out of character and put myself in danger.
Truth, no evasion, but the words gave me no comfort. He and his friends had discussed me, and they obviously thought Iweird little staring mewas nefarious.
Maybe we shouldnt see each other tomorrow. The words were sharp, lashing out at him. Things will be easier if we
Oh, were seeing each other tomorrow. Dont even try to get out of our date.
Date! You said it wasnt a date. To be honest, I wasnt sure I wanted to date him anymore. I wasnt ready for a guy like him. I couldnt handle him.
Whatever. Weve got some getting to know each other to do.
And we will, maybe, I said. But Im actually going to the party with another boy. I didnt owe him an explanation, but I couldnt stop myself from adding, Its not a date, either, were just friends, but I
Cole stopped, just stopped, and whirled on me. His eyelids narrowed. Who?
No. No way Id tell him. I might not have any experience with boys, but I knew hed threaten Justin simply to prove his status as Asher Tough Guy. The problem was, hed follow through. You will not hurt him. Promise me.
Those lids narrowed further. Ill promise not to kill him, hows that?
Okay, that was taking things a little far. Why would you want to kill him?
I dont know. I just do.
How informative. My first thought: I should cancel with Justin, just in case this mood of Coles continued into tomorrow night. My second: I couldnt let Coles moods dictate my life.
Nothing else to say to me? Cole asked.
I lifted my chin in defiance, a new habit I must have developed. No.
Well see about that. He darted back into motion, dragging me with him. We reached his Jeep, and he placed his hands on my waist to heft me inside. Before hed lifted me an inch, his entire body tensed. He sniffed the air.
In reflex, I, too, sniffed the air.
Rot.
Panic threatened to consume me. That same stench had permeated my backyard two nights ago when Id gone tearing out with a baseball bat, intending to confront Bridezilla.
Only two nights. Too soon.
Cole. We need to leave.
Youre leaving. Im staying.
I blinked, and Cole had his crossbow palmed. A cold sweat sheened my skin. Cole?
Go back inside, Ali.
Sounded like an excellent plan, considering I was weaponless, but I stayed just where I was. Come inside with me. If he stayed out here, aloneno! I couldnt let him, wouldnt leave him to face whatever danger lurked out there. He might know what it was, he and his friends might even seek it out as I suspected, but I wasnt going to watch another person fall to the monsters. Please.
Tell the boys I need them, he said, ignoring my plea.
Just then he reminded me of my dad, looking in every direction, stiff, alert, poised to erupt into battle.
The f-fighting vision I had, I stuttered, my mind locking on the thought. Our kiss had happened. Why not this, too?
I had to tell him all the details I hadnt had the courage to tell him before. If I stayed quiet, he would stay out here. He was too stubborn for his own good.
I dont know what happened in yours, but in mine, there were monsters all around us, wanting to eat us. The words gushed out of me. And the other night, I saw two of them, outside my window, for real and not in a vision. At the time, I thought I was crazy. Now, I wasnt so sure. They were watching me and when I checked on them, there were tracks. The ones you showed me.
He sucked in a breath, an indication hed heard me, but he never glanced in my direction. He kept his attention straight ahead, clearly waiting for the threat to materialize. If it did, would he see the monster or not? Would I?
Do you have any idea what you just
A twig snapped in the distance, and he went silent.
Four men trudged into a ray of moonlight, their clothing dirty and ripped. Their eyes sagged, their skin was pitted and their finger bones were gnarled and curled in. Hair had fallen out of their scalps in chunks, leaving them mostly bald.
Nausea hit me with such force I nearly doubled over. Come with me, Cole. Please!
Go back to the club! he shouted at meand sprinted toward the monsters.
* * *
There was no time to process the surreal fact that Cole did, indeed, see the monsters, that this wasnt a hallucination, that my dad had always been right, that monsters had eaten him and my mom. That would come later, and I suspected I would scream and cry and rage.
Right now, I had to fight, had to put the skills my dad had given me to use. I couldnt allow Cole to face the monsters alone, whether I had a weapon or not.
Breatheinoutas if I were part of a movie and someone controlled the stage, the world slowed around me. I watched as Cole ran and hisoh, sweet heaven. Cole multiplied. One Cole became two Coles.
The passage Id read from that journal suddenly boomed inside my mind. We are spirit beings, those spirits our source of power, and we have a soulour logic and emotions, and we live in a body.
No way. Surely notbut what other explanation was there? Coles spirit had just left his body.
There were now two versions of him, and both wore the same clothes. Cole Onehis body, most likelyappeared solid while some sort of mist shimmered around Cole Two. His spirit, I would bet.
His spirit.
It was almost too much to take in. His body stood completely still while his spirit continued to surge ahead. I watched as he extended his crossbow and launched an arrow. Midair, the arrowhead grew sharp little arms and those arms sliced one of the creatures across the throat.
There was no ensuing spray of blood, but there was definitely an open wound. The creatures entire body shook, then he just sort of stopped, his head detaching from his body and both toppling to the ground. And yet, still the monsters body moved. Still his eyes blinked and his teeth snapped in Coles direction.
Even in two pieces, he lived.
How was that possible?
Cole launched another arrow, hit another creature, seconds later meeting the two left standing with his fists. He punched and ducked, spun, went low, reaching for another weapon stashed in his boot. A blade.
A moan sounded from behind me. I whirled. Three more monsters had decided to join our Dance Party Massacre. Two males, one female. I knew their sexes only because the boys wore tuxes and the girl wore a lacy pink gown that belled at the waist. Though they werent my stalker bride and groom, they projected the same hungry menace.
My panic grew wings and flew throughout my entire body. These things had killed my parents. These things had killed my grandfather. I couldnt let them attack Cole while he was busy with the others. Hed lose.
Rage simmered inside me and burned through the panic. These things killed my parents. They killed my grandfather. They wanted to kill Cole.
These things had to die.
Another deep breath, and I, too, launched forward. I had a straight shot, parked cars lined up at both sides, creating a clear path for me. Black oozed from each pitted face watching me, and up close, I saw that their eyes were also black, glazed and shiny with feral yearning. And though one was hunched over and hobbling on what looked to be broken ankles and the other was actually missing a foot, they moved with surprising speed.
Like Cole, I threw punches the moment I reached thembut my fists went through their bodies. I felt only air. Well, air and a wave of revulsion that fizzed in my veins.
The creatures reached for me, too, and they, too, missed, but again that wave of revulsion turned my blood into corrosive acid. I stumbled backward, smacked into a car. The monsters kept me in their sights and closed in on me.
The rage expounded in a starburst of energy, propelling me forward. Id make contact this time. Nothing would stop me.
And you know what? I was right. I punched and I made contact. The waves of revulsion were replaced by frigid cold. Id never been this cold in my entire life. Tremor after tremor shook me as the creatures grabbed for me, trying to latch on to my arms, scratching me. I spun out of the way, my muscles stiff, as if Id never before used themand thats when I saw myself leaning against a car.
But I was here, fighting. Wasnt I? Orwas I like Cole? Was my spirit now, somehow, operating outside my body? But how could that be? Cant process this, either
The confusion cost me dearly. Fingers tangled in my hair and jerked me to the ground.
My dads advice played through my mind. If you fall, go down swinging.
Yes! Id trained for this. I could do this. I arched my back, giving my arm more room to fly backward. My palm slammed into the creatures nose, sending him propelling backward. I lost several strands of hair, but I was freed.
I straightened, twisted, and kicked out my leg, nailing another creaturethe femalein the stomach and sending her propelling backward, too. She ghosted through a car, only to stand on the other side and shake off her disorientation. Her gaze locked on me, and I knew she planned to come back for more.
Shed have to wait her turn. The one Id sent to the ground had turned over, was sitting up and reaching for me. My teeth chattered as I kicked his arm, then his jaw, and though he twisted with the momentum, he remained focused on me.
How was I supposed to disable these things for good? And where was the third one?
Never lose sight of your enemy. Youll regret it. My dad had also told me that.
As with everything else, hed been right.
From behind, trunklike arms wrapped around my torso. I felt a humid puff of breath against my neck. Crap! I slammed my head back, hitting the creature with as much force as possible. His grip loosened, even as my brain protested the action with a sharp lance of pain. Spinning, I doubled tapped him in the jaw with so much power, I think I severed his spinal cord.
As he fell, teeth flew out of his mouth like pieces of candy. But when he landed, he, too, seemed unaffected by the damage. He stood, his head remaining at an odd anglebut still he moved toward me.
In the back of my mind, I knew something just as odd was happening beyond our little fight club circle, but I couldnt yet reason out what it was. Something to consider later, I supposed. If I survived.
I had to survive.
My three opponents converged.
I punched one, then another, while kicking the third. All three extended their arms toward me, and I darted out of the way, still punching, still kicking. The more we fought, the harder my heart pounded, and the more excited they seemed to become. The more excited they grew, the faster they moved.
When one of the males at last managed to shackle my wrist with his fingers, his grip was so strong I couldnt bust free. He tugged me to the ground. I went down swinging, just as before, but he held on, flashing his teeth at me.
I couldnt let him bite me. Couldnt die like this.
But no matter how I twisted or how hard I bucked I still couldnt free myself.
Both the female and the other monster dropped to their knees beside me. There were only three of them, but it seemed as though they possessed a thousand hands, holding me down, ripping at my clothing, their faces loweringloweringwhen they bit me, I screamed.
Blistering, sizzling pain struck, though it failed to melt the ice that encased me. I was a toxic mix of too hot and too cold, dyingwanting to die. Their teeth burrowed through my skin, their faces seeming to disappear inside me. It was as if they were actually gnawing on my bones without spilling a single drop of my blood.
I fought and fought and fought to no avail. One of them finally stopped chewing, then the other, then the other. Though they maintained a steady grip on me, they peered down at me in horror, as if theyd tasted something disgusting.
Suddenly one of the males seized up, an arrow protruding from his neck. He swatted at it as he fell forward and landed beside me. Without him holding down my ankles, I was able to kick the female in the chin. She stumbled backward. The other monster released me of his own free will.
Cole was behind the woman an instant later, reaching around and flattening his palm over her heart. A white light erupted between them, blinding in its intensity. It remained only for a moment, a single snap of fingers, but when it vanished, Coles arms were empty, the female gone.
He raced to one of the males, then the other, producing the same blinding white light. A second later, he was hovering over me, and our gazes met. We were both panting, sweating.
II Couldnt speak. Hurt too badly. Could barely breathe. Darkness swallowed me whole, and I lost sight of him.
Maim The word whispered through my head, followed by another, just as bad.
Kill
The urge to do both filled me. Maimkill
Destroy
Dont say a single word, Cole rasped. Stay quiet until I can put you back together.
I wanted to tell him to help me, to take me to a hospital, please, please, please, but no matter what I tried I could no longer force my voice to work.
Maimkilldestroy.
Yes, I thought next. Yes. I would. I must. That would make everything better.
Maim
Something pricked at my neck, stinging. This will help, he said.
Kill
Something heavy fell on top of me.
Des
I inhaled sharply as my mind blanked and my eyelids popped open. Cole was still hovering above me, looking concerned and beautiful and so wonderfully alive. But the pain, even though it was fading, hadnt gone away. I hurt.
Thats the last of them, but more could be on their way. He grabbed me by the upper arms and hauled me to my feet. My knees gave out, and he swept me up, carrying me to his Jeep.
My body, I managed to whisper. I looked toward the car, where Id left it. And what a strange thought to entertain. Only, I wasnt there any longer. Howwhen
I glanced at my arms. My wrists were nicked and bruised, bleeding, as if theyd truly been bitten.
I glanced at Cole. He was just as nicked and bruised. Are youokay?
Im fine. He got me settled inside the car, claimed the drivers seat and revved the engine. As he burned rubber onto the road, he made a call. Parking lot, he said. Ten are down. I checked, but there arent any more nearby. Yet. Ive got Ali, she was bitten, so you need to take care of this.
That was it. The entire conversation.
What about Kat and the others? I asked, my voice stronger now, with far less grate. And besides a few minor aches, I was beginning to feel normal again.
Theyll be rushed out of there and kept safe.
As he maneuvered down the street, I twisted around to catalog the carnage we must have left in the lot. Butthere were no bodies. No blood. There were people, though. Many living, breathing people.
A tremor moved down my spine as the thing that had bothered me while fighting at last crystallized. There were people walking around, talking and smiling, looking for their cars, but they were oblivious to what had happened.
They didnt see us, I said. How could they not have seen us? Wed been right there, right in front of them, grunting, groaningkilling!
That last word echoed through my head. Killing. Killed. Kill. Id helped him kill those monsters. And I was glad the monsters were dead, I was, but Will we go to jail for this?
People saw our bodies standing there, not the actual fighting. So no, you wont go to jail or even to an insane asylum. Plus, no evidence will be left behind.
I chose to believe him. I would have freaked out otherwise. Would have? I thought as a hysterical laugh built inside me. Id hoped to talk to Cole about this, but not like this. I dont understand what just happened. We left our bodies.
Yes.
How?
His gaze jerked toward me then back to the road. Have you never done that before?
No! I shouted. Of course not.
Well, youve answered one question for me at least. You can see them. Therefore, Ill answer this one for you. How calm he sounded. You cant fight evil in your natural form. Whats in the spirit realm has to be fought in the spirit realm.
Evil. Spirit realm. Sothe monsters were spirits? That would explain how theyd disappeared inside my dad and mom. That would explain why they could move, even after receiving deathblows. That would explain why no one else had seen them. But that failed to explain how I had seen them.
If theyre spirits, howd they leave footprints in the forest? I asked.
I never said they left the prints.
But
I wasnt saying they didnt, either. They can leave tracks. But you cant always assume its them. There are always people chasing them.
Wait. What? You?
Plus a group of others, but thats all Im gonna say about that.
Frustrating! Could he not see how desperate I was for this information?
Still I said, All right. Ill drop the group of others. But tell me this, at least. If I fought the monsters while I was inspirit form, why am I bruised? And how did your crossbow hurt them?
Spirit and body are connected. What you experience outside always manifests inside. As for the crossbow, I brought it with me, like my clothing. Whatever I was wearing on my body was accessible to my spirit.
I would never ever be without a weapon again. So whwhat were those things?
You still dont know? he asked.
No. Well, I had already admitted my father had been right. Evil was out there. Evil was real. My silly belief that we were somehow separate from it had been shattered, yes, but now, I knew those pieces could never be glued back together.
And yet you knew how to fight them.
Not well enough, I snapped. What my dad had taught me about hand-to-hand had helped, yeah, but hed had no idea what he was truly up against because hed never truly fought. Hed always run.
Tell me everything, Ali. Its time.
Yeah, it was. At long last, the things Id hidden from others and even from myself came spilling out. Maybe because Id never felt more vulnerable. Maybe because I knew Cole would believe me. Bottom line: I had to trust someone, and for better or worse, Cole was it.
My dad saw them. He was so afraid of them, he tried to teach my sister and me how to fight them, just in case we were ever cornered. But wed never seen them, and we thought he was crazy, so we paid very little attention to his instructions. Not that he knew what he was doing. He thought he could take them down with a gun. Then he died one night, all of my family died, and I saw the monsters for the first time. Theyate my parents.
Cole listened, his knuckles bleaching of color on the steering wheel.
Why did I start seeing them that night? How long have you seen them? Do the others know about them? If so, can they do what we did?
So many questions, he said. Give me a minute to decide how to break this to you.
Tell me now, I wanted to scream. Instead, I remained quiet. I wanted the answers, but I also feared them. They would change my life.
Again.
Was I ready for another change?
What would my dad have said about this? His face twinkled through my mind, his blond hair disheveled, his blue eyes glassy. After all the horrible things Id said about him over the years, all the times Id shut him down, he and my mom had been the only ones on the right path.
Daddy, I projected toward the sky, hoping he could hear me. Im so sorry for doubting you. Im sorry for every awful thought I ever had about you, and for all the times I wanted Mom to leave you and marry someone else. If I could redo my life, I would take you seriously. I would love you and accept you and help you.
First, lets get something clear, Cole said. You cant tell anyone what happened tonight.
I know.
Not even Kat.
I know! If I had treated my own father like a candidate for a straitjacket, how would my new friends treat me? Yeah, that one didnt take a lot of thought. Id be shunned, laughed at and publically humiliated. No, thanks.
Cole cursed under his breath. Grab the wheel and steer toward the suits. Now!
What I said, thinking hed cursed at me. Wrong! Two monsters had ambled into the road, and they were headed straight for us. Right on their heels were five walking hazmat suits.
Ali!
As ordered, I grabbed the wheel. Cole palmed a blade, and with his free hand wrapped around a lever on the Jeeps roof, he leaned out of the open doorway. His other hand, the one clutching the blade, stretched outand kept on stretching, that part of his spirit rising out of his body.
His blade slashed across several of the suits, a hissing sound filling the air.
I think I screamed. My brain was too busy trying to figure out what had just happened to be sure. Those are real live people, Cole! At least, I thought they were.
A second later, he was back in his seat and driving, his blade put away, as if nothing had happened. I didnt hurt them, just opened their suits to send them home.
Okay. I could deal with that. Next time, do me a favor and go for the monsters. Wait. Next time? Oh, no, no, no. I didnt want to do this again. Id learned my lesson.
They werent the biggest threat.
But
If Frosty and the others stumbled upon the hazmats, theyd be in trouble, their attention divided between the humans and thewhatd you call them? Monsters. So to answer one of your earlier questions, yes, my friends can see them. He flicked me a quick glance. And now you have another thousand questions, dont you?
Of course not. But what do you call them, if not monsters? Why were those people wearing suits? I mean, if the suits help, why dont you and your friends wear them? Or do you? See, only four questions.