The Darkest Craving - Джена Шоуолтер

The Darkest Craving(The tenth book in the Lords of the Underworld series)A novel by Gena Showalter

First, to my editor, Emily Ohanjanians. Your insight never ceases to amaze me. Thank you so much for all your hard work and dedication.

Second, to my agent, Deidre Knight. I am so blessed to have you in my corner. No matter what I throw at you, youre always there to help me!

To Carla Gallway, for all that you do! You are generous with your time and resources and so wonderfully kind, and Im so thankful to know you!

To the winners of the blog contest: Sabrina Collazo, Lizabel Rivera-Coriano, Charlayne Elizabeth Denney, Seemone Washington and Joni Payne. I hope you love Kanes story as much as I do.

To Michelle Renaud and Lisa Wray. Youre my girls, and I couldnt ask for a better team!

To my favorite restaurant, The Stuffed Olive, for feeding me while I was on deadline!

No dedication would be complete without mentioning my beloved Jill Monroe. Youre stuck with me, because I wont ever let you go!

CHAPTER ONE

New York City

Present day

JOSEPHINA AISLING PEERED down at the male splayed across the motel room bed. He was an immortal warrior, beautiful in a way no mortal could ever hope to be. Silky hair of jet, chestnut and flax spilled over the pillow, the multicolored strands forming a flawless tapestry, inviting the eye to linger a minute, then a minute more...sweet mercy, why not forever?

His name was Kane. He had long, boyish lashes, a strong nose and a stubborn chin. At six feet four, he was cut with the kind of muscle only earned on the bloodiest of battlefields. Though he wore stained and dirty pants, she knew a large butterfly tattoo dominated the right side of his hip, the ink thick and black, a little jagged. The tops of the wings stretched over the material and every so often tiny waves rippled through them, as though the insect struggled to lift from his skinor burrow deeper.

Either was possible. The tattoo was a mark of absolute, utter evil, a visible sign of the demon contained inside Kanes body.

Demon...she shuddered. Rulers of hell. Liars, thieves. Murderers. They were darkness without any hint of light. They lured and tempted. They ruined, tortured and destroyed.

But Kane wasnt the demon.

Like all of her race, the mighty Fae, she had spent a good portion of her life studying Kane and his friendsthe Lords of the Underworld. In fact, at the command of the Fae king, spies had spent countless centuries following the warriors, watching and reporting back. Scribes had then printed books with stories and pictures of what theyd witnessed. Mothers had bought those books and read them to their children. Then, when those children had grown up, they had made their own purchases, the need to know what happened next too strong to ignore.

The Lords of the Underworld had become the stars of the best and the worst soap opera in Séduire, the realm of the Fae.

Josephina always ate up every detail. Especially those about the ultra sexy Paris and the devastatingly lonely Torin. Kane, the beautiful tragedy, was a close third. She could probably recite his life history better than she could her own.

He was thousands of years old. Hed only had four serious girlfriends in his lifetime. Although, for a while, hed had a string of meaningless one-night stands. Hed fought in bloody battle after bloody battle with his enemy, the Hunters. Three times, theyd managed to capture and torture himand shed waited, breathless, to hear of his escape.

Going back even further, to the beginning, he and his friends had stolen and opened Pandoras box, unleashing the demons from inside. The Greeks had been in power at the time, and theyd decided to punish the warriors by turning their bodies into receptacles for the very evil theyd freed. Kane carried Disaster. The others carried Promiscuity, Disease, Distrust, Violence, Death, Pain, Wrath, Doubt, Lies, Misery, Secrets and Defeat. Each creature came with a nearly debilitating curse.

Promiscuity had to sleep with a new woman every day or he weakened and died.

Disease couldnt touch another living creature without starting a plague.

Disaster caused catastrophes everywhere Kane went, a fact that sliced at Josephinas heart and resonated deep. Her entire life was a disaster.

Dont touch me, he muttered, his voice a sharp, callous rasp. Powerful legs kicked the already battered sheets away. Hands off. Stop. I said stop!

Poor Kane. Another nightmare plagued him.

No ones touching you, she assured him. Youre safe.

He calmed, and she released a relieved breath.

When shed first stumbled upon him, hed been chained to a dais in hell, his chest cavity split open, his ribs spread and exposed, his wrists and ankles hanging on by fraying tendons.

Hed looked like a slab of beef at the local butchers.

Ill have a two-pound rump roast and a pound of ground chuck.

Gross. Just gross. Im thoroughly disgusted with you. Over the years, shed spent so much time alone, conversing with herself had become her only source of amusement...and sadly, companionship. I would have ordered four pounds of pork loin.

Despite his condition, finding him was the best thing to ever happen to her. He was her ticket to freedom. Or possibly...acceptance?

Princess Synda, her half sister and the Faes most bestest female ever born, wasnt a Lord, but she carried the demon of Irresponsibility. Apparently, there had been more demons than naughty, box-stealing warriors, and the excess had been given to the inmates of Tartarusan underground prison for immortals. Syndas first husband had been one of those inmates, and somehow, when the male had died, the demon had wormed its way inside her.

When the king of the Fae had learned of it, hed launched a hunt for details about the causeand the solution. So far, everyone had come up empty.

I could bring Kane to a meeting of the Fae High Court, show him off, let him answer any questions the congregation has, and my father might see me, really see me, for the first time in my life.

Her shoulders drooped. No, Im not ever going back.

Josephina had always been, and would always be the royal whipping girl, there to receive the punishments Synda the Beloved was due.

Synda was always due.

Last week, in a fit of temper, the princess had burned to the ground the royal stables, and all of the animals trapped inside. Josephinas sentence? A ticket to the Never-endinga portal leading into hell.

There, a day was like a thousand years and a thousand years like a day, so, for what had seemed like an endless eternity, she had fallen down, down, down a blackened pit. She had screamed, but no one had heard. Had begged for mercy, but no one had cared. Had cried, but had never found an anchor.

Then, she and another girl had landed in the center of hell.

How startling to realize shed never actually been alone.

The girl had been a Phoenix, a race descended from the Greeks. Every full-blooded warrior possessed the ability to rise from the dead, time and time again, growing stronger after every resurrectionuntil the final death came, and there could be no more bodily restoration.

Kane began to thrash and moan again.

Im not going to let anything happen to you, she told him.

Again, he stilled.

If only the Phoenix had responded to her so well. When the girl had first seen her, hatred had lanced at her, hatred going far beyond what the children of the Titanslike Josephinaand the children of the Greeks usually felt for each other. But even still, the Phoenix hadnt tried to kill her, had instead allowed her to follow her through the cave, searching for the exit, without having to exert any of her own waning energy. Like Josephina, shed just wanted out.

They had stumbled past crimson-splattered walls, inhaling the fetid stink of sulfur. Grunts and groans had reverberated in their ears, creating a terrible symphony their deprived senses hadnt been ready for. Then theyd stumbled upon the mutilated warrior. Josephina had recognized him, despite his condition, and stopped.

Awe had filled her. There, in front of herher!had been one of the infamous Lords of the Underworld. She hadnt known how she could help him, when she could barely help herself, but shed been determined to try. Whatever proved necessary.

A lot had proven necessary.

She looked at him. You were my first and only opportunity to achieve my new greatest desire, she admitted, something I definitely couldnt do on my own. And as soon as you wake up, Im going to need you to make good on your promise.

And then...

She sighed, quieted. She brushed her fingertips over his brow.

Even in his sleep, he flinched. Dont, he snarled. Ill destroy you, piece by piece. You and your entire family.

He wasnt bragging, wasnt issuing a hollow threat. He would ensure it happened, and he would probably smile the entire time.

Probably? Ha! He would. Typical Lord.

Kane, she said, and again, he calmed. I think maybe its time to wake you up. My family is out there, and they want me back. While a thousand years passed for me inside that pit, only a day passed for them. Since I failed to return to Séduire, Fae soldiers are probably hunting me.

To add to her bowl of miserypuffs, the Phoenix was definitely hunting her, determined to enslave her and avenge the wrong Josephina had done her during their escape.

Kane. She gently shook his shoulder. His skin was shockingly soft and exquisitely smooth, yet also feverishly hot, the muscles beneath as tight and firm as grenades. I need you to open your eyes.

Long lashes flipped up, revealing gold-and-emerald irises glassed over and dulled. A second later, big masculine hands wrapped around her neck and tossed her to her back. The mattress bounced, even with her slight weight. She offered no resistance as Kane rolled on top of her, pinning her in place. He was heavy, his grip so tight she couldnt breathe in the rose scent shed come to associate with him. An odd fragrance for a male, and one she didnt understand.

Who are you? he snarled. Where are we?

Hes speaking directly to me. Me!

Answer.

She tried to reply, couldnt.

He loosened his hold.

There. Better. Deep breath in. Out. For starters, Im your amazing and wonderful rescuer. Since receiving compliments had died with her mother, shed decided to give them to herself at every opportunity. Release me, and well work out the particulars.

Who, he demanded, squeezing her tighter.

Black winked through her line of sight. Her lungs burned, desperate for air, but still she offered no resistance.

Female. The pressure eased again. Answer. Now.

Caveman. Free. Now, she retorted as she sucked in oxygen.

Could you watch your mouth, please? You dont want to scare him away.

He jerked away from her to crouch at the end of the bed. His gaze remained on her, watching intently as she slowly sat up. A red flush colored his cheeks, and she wondered if he was embarrassed by his actions or simply struggling to hide the weakness still pumping through him.

You have five seconds, female.

Or what, warrior? Youll hurt me?

Yes. Determined. Assured.

Silly man. Would it be totally gauche of her to ask him to sign her T-shirt? Dont you remember what you promised me?

I didnt promise you anything, he said, and though his tone was confident, his features darkened with confusion.

You did. Think back to your last day in hell. It was you, me and a couple thousand of your worst enemies.

His brows drew together, and his eyes glazed with remembrance, comprehension...then horror. He shook his head, as though desperate to dislodge the thoughts now swirling through his mind. You werent serious. You couldnt have been serious.

I was.

He popped his jaw, an action of frustrated aggression. Whats your name?

I think its better if you dont know. That way, theres no emotional attachment and you can more easily do what I require.

I never actually said Id do it, he gritted out. And why are you looking at me like that?

Like what?

Like Im...a giant box of chocolates.

Ive heard of you, she said, and left it at that. Truth, without explanation.

Hardly. If youd heard anything about me, youd be running away in fear.

Oh, really? I know that during the many wars youve fought, your friends often left you behind, afraid youd cause some kind of travesty for them. I know you often keep yourself shut away from the world, terrified of the same. And yet, still youve managed to slay thousands. Dare I say bazillions?

He ran his tongue over perfect white teeth. How do you know that?

Why dont we call it...gossip.

Gossip isnt always right, he muttered. In seconds, he had swept his gaze through the small room and refocused on her.

She also happened to know that visual caress was a habit hed developed through the years, one meant to take everything in. Entrances, exits, weapons that could be used against himweapons he could use.

This time, all he would have seen was the peeling yellow wallpaper, the scarred nightstand with the chipped lamp. The sputtering air-conditioning unit. The brown shag carpet. The trash bin filled with bloody rags and emptied tubes of medicine shed used on his abrasions.

That day in hell, he began. You told me what you wanted, and then you made the mistake of assuming I agreed.

That sounded like a refusal. But...he cant refuse me. Not now. You gurgled your assent. Afterward, I did my part. Now you will do yours.

No. I never asked for your help. His voice lashed like the sharpest of whips, striking at her, leaving an undeniable sting. Never wanted it.

You did, too! Your eyes begged me, and you cant deny it. You couldnt see your eyes, so you have no idea what they were doing.

A protracted pause. Then, quite calmly, he said, I think thats the most illogical argument Ive ever heard.

No, its the smartest, but your puny brain simply cant compute it.

My eyes did not beg, he said, and thats final.

They did, too, she insisted. And I did a terrible thing to get you out. Sadly, sending the Phoenix a note of apology wouldnt fix the problem.

As weak as Josephina had been in hell, shed required help with Kane. Only, once shed caught up to the Phoenix, still hacking her way to freedom, thered been a slight problem. The girl had refused so vehementlyrot in hell, Fae whorethat Josephina had known there would be no hope of changing her mind. So, Josephina had used the ability she alone carried. A blessing in the right circumstances. A curse that had kept her locked in a world without physical contact. With only a touch, shed stolen the strength right out of the Phoenixs body, reducing the girl to a boneless heap.

Yes, Josephina had draped the warrior woman over one shoulder and carried her out of hell, the same as shed done for Kane, fighting demons along the waya miracle considering shed never fought a day in her lifeeventually finding a way outside, but that wouldnt matter to the Phoenix. A crime had been committed, and a price had to be paid.

I never asked you to do terrible things. His voice contained the darkest of warnings.

One she did not heed. Maybe not audibly, but even still, I nearly broke my back saving you. She settled to her knees, shaking the mattress and nearly bouncing the weakened Kane to the floor. You weigh, like, ten thousand pounds. But theyre glorious pounds, she rushed to add. Stop insulting the man!

His slitted gaze tripped over every inch of her. The action lacked the stealth hed used for the room, and yet, it was almost tactile, as if hed touched her, too. Could he see the goose bumps now breaking over her skin?

How did a girl like you manage such a feat?

A girl like her. Did he sense her inferiority? She lifted her chin, saying, An information exchange wasnt part of our bargain.

For the last time, woman, there was no bargain.

Tremors of dread rocked her, overshadowing...whatever hed previously made her feel. If you dont do what you promised, Ill...Ill...

What?

Suffer for the rest of my life. What would it take to change your mind and make you do the right thing?

His expression shuttered, hiding all of his thoughts. What species are you?

A question totally off topic, but okay, she could roll. Since the Fae were not a well-liked race, the men best known for their lack of honor in battle, as well as their insatiable need to sleep with anything that moved, and the women known for backstabbing and scandaland okay, fine, their ability to sew a killer wardrobethe knowledge might spur him into action.

Im half human, half Fae. See? She pulled back the sides of her hair, drawing his attention to her ears and the points at the end.

His gaze locked on those points and narrowed. Fae are descendants of Titans. Titans are children of fallen angels and humans. They are the current rulers of the lowest level of the skies. He shot out each fact as if it were a bullet.

Cant roll my eyes at a star. Thank you for the history lesson.

He frowned. That makes you...

Evil in his eyes? An enemy?

He shook his head, refusing to finish the thought. Then, his nose wrinkled, as if hed just smelled something...not unpleasant, but not welcome, either. He inhaled sharply, and his frown deepened. You look nothing like the girl who rescued me...girls who rescued me...no, just one, he said with another shake of his head, as if he were trying to make sense of things that had happened. Her face and hair kept changing, and I recall each countenance, yet what I see now I didnt see then. But your scent...

Was the same, yes. I possessed the ability to switch my appearance.

One of his brows arched. Possessed. Past tense.

Even in his compromised state, hed caught her meaning. Correct. I no longer have the ability. The strengthand capabilitiesshe borrowed from others could remain with her for as little time as an hour to as long as a few weeks. She had no control over the time frame. What shed taken from the Phoenix had faded yesterday.

Youre lying. No one has an ability one day, but not the next.

I never lieexcept for the few times I do, in fact, lie, but its never intentional, and Im totally telling the truth right now. She raised her right hand. Promise.

He pursed his lips. How long have I been here?

Seven days.

Seven days, he gasped out.

Yes. We spent most of our time playing incompetent doctor and ungrateful patient.

A dark scowl contorted his features, and oh, it was a scary thing to behold. The books hadnt done him justice. Seven days, he repeated.

I didnt miscount, I assure you. Ive been crossing off the seconds in the calendar in my heart.

He gave her the stink eye. You have a smart mouth, dont you?

She brightened. You think so? Really? It was the first compliment shed received from someone other than herself since her mother had died, and she would cherish it. Thank you. Would you say my mouth is extremely intelligent or just slightly above average?

His jaw fell, as if he meant to reply, but no sound emerged from him. His eyelids were closing...opening...closing again, and his big body was swaying from side to side. He was about to go down, and if he hit the floor, she would never be able to lift him onto the bed.

Josephina surged forward, reaching for him with gloved hands. Though he teetered backward, he slapped her arms away, wanting no contact between them. Smart man. (As smart as he thought she was?) Down he fell, slamming into the carpet with a loud thud.

As she scrambled to her feet to rush to his sideand do what, she didnt knowthe motel door burst open, shards of wood raining in every direction. A tall, thickly muscled warrior with dark hair stood in the center of the gaping hole, his features bathed in shadows. Menace lanced from him. Maybe because he gripped two daggersand they were already stained with blood.

Another warrior moved in behind him, this one blond, with...oh, someone save me. Guts hung from his hair.

Her fathers men had found her.

CHAPTER TWO

KANE BATTLED A tide of pain, humiliation and failure. Hed been created fully formed, a warrior to the depths of his core. Throughout the centuries, he had fought in countless wars. He had slain enemy after enemy, and had walked away with many a blood-drenched injurybut hed walked with a smile. Hed fought, and hed won, and others had suffered for coming after him. And yet, here he was, on the floor of a dirty motel, too weak to move, at the mercy of a beautiful, fragile female whod seen him at his worst: chained, violated and carved open after yet another round of torture.

He wanted those images cut from her mind, even if he had to reach inside and remove them with a blade.

Then, he would cut them out of his own. The Hunters, blaming him for every disaster theyd ever faced. Their bomb. A trip into hell. A horde of demon minions attacking, killing the Hunters and secreting Kane away. Day after day of torment.

Shackles. The drip, drip of blood. Satisfied grins, bloodstained teeth. Hands, everywhere. Mouths, seeking. Tongues, licking.

A soundtrack played quietly in the background. Moans of painhis. Moans of pleasurenone his own. The slap of flesh against flesh. The scrape of nails, digging deep. A bark of laughter.

Terrible scents filled his nose. Sulfur. Arousal. Dirt. Old copper. Sweat. The pungent sting of fear.

One brutal emotion after another bombarded him. Disgust, rage, feelings of utter violation. Sorrow, humiliation, sadness. Helplessness. Panic. More disgust.

He moaned, a tragic sound. Desperate to avoid a breakdown, he erected a brick wall around his screaming mind, blocking the worst of the emotions. Cant deal right now. Just...cant. He was free at least. He couldnt forget that. Rescue had come.

No, not a rescue. Not at first. Warriors had stolen him from the minions, only to tie him down for their own special brand of torture.

Then, the girl had arrived, demanding he help her with the vilest of tasks.

What have you done to him? a male voice roared. Why were there Fae soldiers ready to sneak into this room?

Wait. Youre not with the Fae? she demanded.

Who are you, female?

Kane recognized the speaker. Sabin, his leader, and the keeper of the demon of Doubt. Sabin was a male who wouldnt hesitate to snap a womans neck if he thought that woman had hurt one of his soldiers.

Me? the girl said. Im no one, and Ive done nothing. Really.

Lies will only make it worse for you.

Another speaker Kane recognized. Strider, the keeper of the demon of Defeat. Like Sabin, Strider wouldnt hesitate to harm a woman in defense of a friend.

Kane should have been comforted by their appearance. They were brothers of his heart, the family he needed, and they would protect him, whisk him to safety, and do everything within their power to ensure he healed. But he was scabbed, bruised and emotionally naked, and they were now witnesses to his shame, too.

Oh, sweet heat. Why didnt you step into the light sooner? I know who you are, the girl gasped out. Youre...youre...you.

Yes, and Im also your doom, Sabin snapped.

The warrior assumed the black-haired girl was responsible for Kanes condition. A mistake. He tried to sit up, but the muscles in his stomach were useless, not yet completely woven back together.

Please dont take this the wrong way, said the girl, but thats got to be the lamest thing anyones ever said to me, and Kane here has said some doozies. Youre a magnificent warrior known throughout all the lands for your strength and cunning. I know you can issue a better threat than that.

More than once, the silly things that had come out of that candy-apple mouth had made him want to smile, despite the pain relentlessly battering him. Now was one of those times. He didnt understand it.

Theres a right way to take that? Sabin snapped. Guard the door, he said to Strider. Im going to tear her from limb to limb.

No can do, boss. Im calling dibs.

Does that mean were battling to the death? she asked casually.

Yes, both men replied in unison.

Oh, well. Okay, then. Lets get started, shall we?

Kane stiffened.

Is she serious? Sabin.

No way. Strider.

I am, she said. I really am.

Big talk for such a tiny girl.

A girl who confused Kane in every way.

She had tended him gently, tenderly, and yet he had hurt from more than just his injuries. And not a good hurt, either, to let him know he was alive, but a sharp throb that rode the waves in his veins, reaching him at a cellular level, like a disease, a cancer, eating at him, demanding he get away from her as quickly as possible. And yet, inside, deeper still, where primal instinct jerked at a flimsy leash, a desire to grab her, to hold on and never let go, consumed him.

She was beautiful, funny and sweet, and he heard one word every time he looked at her. Mine.

Mine. Mine. MINE.

It was a constant stream of noise, undeniableunstoppable. It was also wrong. His mine would never cause him pain. And he didnt want a mine. Any time hed tried to make a go of a relationship, the evil inside him swiftly destroyed itand the female. Now, after everything that had happened to him...

A rise of the disgust, sizzling and blistering, tightened his hands into dangerous weapons. No, he didnt want a mine.

You eager to die? Strider asked, stalking a circle around her.

You stalling? she said. Dont think you can take me?

The warrior sucked in a breath.

The girl had issued a challengeintentional or unintentional?and the warriors demon had just accepted. Strider would do everything in his power to win, and Kane couldnt blame him. Anytime the male lost a challenge, he suffered in agonizing pain for days.

Demons always came with a curse.

Have to stop him. Whether the girl belonged to Kane or not, she wasnt to be harmed. Seeing a single bruise on that sun-licked skin would unhinge him, he knew it, could already feel the darkness rising, his control teetering at the edge of chilling violence.

As he again struggled to sit up, multiple footsteps pounded, causing the floor to reverberate. Low growls erupted. The swish of clothing whispered past. Flesh met flesh, bone met bone. Metal clinked against metal. The males would destroy her.

Is that all you got? the girl taunteda taunt undercut by her heavy panting. Come on, fellas. Lets make this memorable, one for the history books!

No, Kane tried to shout, but not even his ears picked up the sound.

Strider jumped over him. Another clang of metal echoed.

How can this be memorable? Sabin roared. The only thing youre doing is leaping out of the way when we strike.

Sorry. Im not meaning to, but instinct keeps kicking in, she said.

To anyone but Kane, who knew her secret desire, the conversation would have sounded weird.