He lifts his hand to my face and caresses my cheek, and I slap it so hard the crunch of his bones pierces the air as his crumpled fingers wobble and dangle before me.
"Ouch." He smiles, shaking his hand as he flexes his instantly healed digits. "You're a feisty one, aren't you? But you know how that only turns me on, right?" I roll my eyes, feeling his cold breath on my cheek as he says, "Why do you continue to fight me, Ever? Why do you push me away when I'm all you have left?"
"Why are you doing this?" I ask, my stomach twitching as his eyes darken and narrow, displaying a complete absence of color and light. "What did Damen ever do to you?"
He tilts his head back, peering at me when he says, "It's real simple, darlin'." His voice suddenly changing, dropping the British accent and adopting a tone I've never heard from him before. "He killed Drina. So I'm killing him. And then everything's even.
Case closed."
And the second he says it, I know. I know exactly how I'll take him down and get behind that door.
Because along with the who and the how, I've now got the why. The elusive motive I've needed all this time. And now the only thing standing between Damen and me is one solid punch to Roman's navel chakra, or sacral center as it's sometimes called the center of jealousy, envy, and the irrational desire to possess.
One solid blow and Roman is history.
But still, before I take him down, I've one more thing to do. So I look at him, my gaze fixed and unwavering when I say, "But Damen didn't kill Drina. I did."
"Nice try." He laughs. "Pathetic, a bit maudlin like I said, but I'm afraid it won't work. You can't save Damen that way."
"But why not? If you're so interested in justice, an eye for an eye and all that then you should know that I'm the one who did it." I nod, my voice taking on new urgency and strength. "I'm the one who killed that, bitch." Watching as he sways, ever so slightly, but still enough for me to notice. "She was always hanging around, completely obsessed with Damen. You must've known that, right? That she was totally fixated on him?"
He winces. Neither confirming nor denying, but that wince is all I need to keep going, knowing I've hit the sore spot. "She wanted me out of the way so she could have Damen to herself, and after months of my trying to ignore her and hoping she'd go away, she was dumb enough to show up at my house and try to confront me. And wellwhen she refused to back down and went after me insteadI killed her." I shrug, relaying the story with a lot more calm than I felt at the time, making sure to leave out my own ineptitude, cluelessness, and fears. "And it was so easy. " I smile, shaking my head as though reliving the moment all over again. "Seriously. You should've seen her. It's like, one moment she was standing before me all flaming red hair and white skinand the nextgone ! And by the way, Damen didn't show up until the deed was already done. So, as you see, if anyone's guilty, it's me and not him." My gaze is on his, my fists ready to strike, moving right into his space when I say, "So, what do you say? You still wanna date me? Or would you rather kill me instead? Either way, I'll understand." I place my hand on his chest and push him hard against the door. Thinking how easy it would be to just lower it a few inches, jab really hard, and be done with all this.
"You?" he says, the word more like a question, a crisis of conscience, than the accusation he meant it to be. "You and not Damen?"
I nod, my body tensed, poised for fight, knowing nothing will keep me from getting into that room, and raising my fist as he says, "It's not too late! We can still save him!"
I freeze, my fist hovering at the halfway mark, unsure if I'm being played.
Watching as he shakes his head, visibly distressed when he says, "I didn't know I thought for sure it was himhe gave me everythinghe gave me lifethis life ! And I thought for sure that he"
He moves around me and flees down the hall, calling, "You go check on him I'll get the antidote!"
CHAPTER 50
The first thing I see when I burst through the door is Damen. Still lying on the futon, looking as thin and pale as he did when I left him.
The second thing I see is Rayne. Huddling by his side, pressing a damp cloth to his face. Her eyes growing wide when she sees me, her hand held up before her as she shouts, "Ever, no ! Don't come any closer! If you want to save Damen, then stop right there do not break the circle!"
I gaze down, seeing some grainy white substance that looks just like salt, formed into a perfect ring that keeps the two of them in and me out. Then I look at her, wondering what she wants, what she could possibly have in mind cowering beside Damen and warning me away. Noticing how she looks even odder outside of Summerland with her ghostly pale face, tiny features, and large coal-black eyes. But when my gaze shifts to Damen, watching as he lights and struggles for each breath I know I have to get to him, no matter what she says. It's my fault he's like this. I abandoned him. Left him behind. I was stupid, and selfish, and naive enough to think that everything would work out okay just because I wanted it to, and that Ava would stick around to pick up the pieces.
I step forward, my toe landing just outside the border as Roman rushes in from behind me and shouts, "What the bloody hell is she doing in here?" His eyes wide with shock as he gapes at Rayne, still crouching beside Damen from behind the barrier. "Don't trust him!" she says, her eyes darting between us. "He knew I was here all along." "I didn't know any such thing! I've never even seen you before!" He shakes his head. "I mean, sorry darlin', but Catholic schoolgirls just ain't my thing. I prefer my women a little more feisty, like Ever, here." He reaches toward me, trailing his fingers down the length of my back, chilling my skin in a way that makes me want to react but I don't. I just take a deep breath and try to stay calm. Focusing on his other hand the one that's holding the antidotethe key to saving Damen.
Because in the end, that's the only thing that matters everything else can wait.
I snatch the bottle and unscrew the top. And I'm just about to penetrate Rayne's circle of protection when Roman puts his hand on my arm and says, "Not so fast."
I pause, glancing between them, Rayne looking me right in the eye when she says, "Don't do it, Ever!
Whatever he tells you, do not listen. Listen only to me. Ava dumped the antidote and ran off with the elixir not long after you left, but luckily I got here just before he did." She gestures toward Roman, her eyes like angry points of the darkest night. "He needs you to break the circle so he can get in, because he can't get to Damen without you. Only the worthy can access the circle, only those with good intent. But if you step in now, Roman will follow, so if you care about Damen, if you truly want to protect him, you have to wait until Romy gets here."
"Romy?"
Rayne nods, glancing between Roman and me. "She's bringing the antidote, it will be ready by nightfall since it needs the full moon's energy to be fully complete." But Roman just shakes his head, laughing as he says, "What antidote? I'm the only one with the antidote. Hell, I'm. the one who made the poison, so what the hell does she know?" And when he sees the confusion on my face, he adds, "I really don't see how you have much of a choice. If you listen to this one" he flicks his fingers toward Rayne"Damen will die. But if you listen to me, he won't. The math's rather simple, don't you think?"
I look at Rayne, watching as she shakes her head and warns me not to listen to him, to hold out for Romy, to wait for nightfall, which is still hours away. But then I gaze at Damen beside her, his breath becoming more labored, the color drained from his face"And if you're trying to trick me?" I say, all of my attention now focused on Roman. Holding my breath as he says, "Then he dies." I swallow hard and stare at the floor, unsure what to do. Do I trust Roman, the rogue immortal who's responsible for all of tills in the first place? Or do I trust Rayne, the creepy twin with her covert double-talk and an agenda that's never been clear? But when I close my eyes and try to concentrate on my gut, knowing that it's rarely wrong, even though I often ignore it, it's frustratingly still. Then looking at Roman when he says, "But if I'm not tricking you, then he lives . So I really don't see how you have much of a choice "
"Don't listen to him," Rayne says. "He's not here to help you, I am! I'm the one who sent you the vision in Summerland that day, I'm the one who showed you all the ingredients required to save him You were shut out of the akashic records because you'd already made your choice. And while we tried to show you the way, while we tried to help you and stop you from leaving, you refused to listen, and now " "I thought you didn't know my business?" I narrow my gaze. "I thought you and your creepy sister couldn't access" I pause, glancing at Roman, knowing I have to tread carefully with what I'm about to say. "I thought you couldn't see certain things."
Rayne looks at me, her face stricken, shaking her head as she says, "We never lied to you, Ever. And we never misled you. We can't see certain things, that's true. But Romy's an empath and I'm a precog, and together we get feelings and visions. That's how we first found you, and we've been trying to guide you ever since, using the information we sense. Ever since Riley asked us to look after you " "Riley?" I gape, my stomach swirling with nausea. How could she be involved in any of this? "We met her in Summerland and showed her around. We even went to school together, a private boarding school she manifested, which is why we wear this." She motions to her plaid skirt and blazer, the uniform she and her sister always wear. And I remember how Riley always dreamed of going to boarding school, saying it was so she could get away from me. So it makes sense that she'd manifest one. "Then, when she decided to" she pauses, glancing at Roman before she continues, "to cross over, she asked us to look after you if we ever saw you around." "I don't believe you," I say, even though I have no reason not to. "Riley would've told me, she would've . .." But then I remember how she once said something about meeting some people who showed her around, and I wonder if she was referring to the twins. "We also know Damen hehe helped us oncea long time ago ..." And when she looks at me, I'm just about to fold when she says, "But if you could just wait a few more hours until the antidote's complete, then Romy will be here and ..." I glance at Damen, his emaciated body, his pale, clammy skin, his eyes appearing sunken, his breath ragged, every inhale and exhale progressively weakerand I know there's only one choice to make. So I turn my back on Rayne and look at Roman when I say, "Okay, just tell me what to do."
CHAPTER 51
Roman nods, his eyes on mine as he removes the antidote from my grasp and says, "We'll need something sharp."
I squint, not quite understanding. "What're you talking about? If that's really the antidote like you say, then why can't he just drink it? I mean, it's ready, right?" My stomach twisting under the weight of his gaze, so steady and focused on mine. "It is the antidote. It just requires one final ingredient to make it complete." I suck in my breath, knowing I should've known better, that it couldn't be that easy when Roman's involved. "What is it?" I say, my voice as shaky as I feel inside. "What kind of game are you playing?" "There, there." He smiles. "Not to worry. It's nothing too complicated and it certainly won't take hours. " He shakes his head at Rayne. "All we need to get this show on the road is just a drop or two of your blood.
That's it."
I stare at him, not comprehending. I mean, how could that make the slightest bit of difference between life and death?
But Roman just looks at me, answering the question in my head when he says, "In order to save your immortal partner, he must consume an antidote containing a drop of his true love's blood. Believe me, it's the only way."
I swallow hard, far less afraid of shedding blood than being played a fool and losing Damen for good.
"Surely you're not worried that you're not really Damen's one true love are you ?" he asks, his lips curving the tiniest bit. "Perhaps I should call Stacia instead?"
I grasp a pair of nearby scissors and aim them toward my wrist, and I'm just about to plunge when Rayne screams, "Ever, no ! Don't do it! It's a trick! Don't believe him! Don't listen to a word he says!"
I look at Damen, seeing the labored rise and fall of his chest moving so slow and ragged now there's no time to waste. I know in my heart that he has only minutes left, not hours. Then I bring the scissors down hard, watching as their sharp pointy tip penetrates my wrist, nearly splitting it in two. Shooting a geyser of blood straight into the air, before gravity takes over and pushes it down. Hearing Rayne scream, a wail so piercing it cuts through the sound of everything else, as Roman crouches beneath me, collecting my blood. And other than feeling faint, and the slightest bit dizzy, it's only a matter of seconds before my veins are fused and my skin is all healed. So I grab the bottle, ignore Rayne's protests, and break through the circle, pushing her aside as I drop to my knees, slipping my fingers under Damen's neck as I force him to drink. Watching his breath grow fainter and fainter until it stops completely.
"NO!" I cry. "You can't die you can't leave me!" I force the liquid down the length of his throat, determined to bring him back, return him to life, like he once did with me.
I hold him to me, willing him to live. Everything around us completely shut out as I focus on Damen, my one true soul mate, my eternal partner, my only love, refusing to say good-bye, refusing to give up hope. And when the bottle is empty, I collapse onto his chest, pressing my lips against his, filling him with my breath, my being, my life. As I murmur the words he once said to me: "Open your eyes and look at me!"
Over and over again
Until he finally does.
"Damen!" I cry, a flood of tears streaming down my cheeks and onto his face. "Oh, thank God, you're back! I missed you so much and I love youand I promise I'll never ever leave you again! Just just please forgive me please"
His eyes flicker open as his mouth tries to move, forming words I can't hear. And when I lower my ear to his lips, so grateful to be with him again, our reunion is cut short by a series of claps.
Slow, steady claps coming from Roman who's now standing behind me. Having penetrated the circle as Rayne cowers in a far corner of the room.
"Bravo!" he says, his face mocking, amused, as he glances between Damen and me. "Well done, Ever. I must say, that was all very touching. It's not often one bears witness to such a heartfelt reunion."
I swallow hard, my hands shaking, my stomach beginning to ping, wondering what he could possibly be up to. I mean, Damen's alive, the antidote worked, what else could there be?
I glance at Damen, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest as he falls back to sleep, then I gaze toward Rayne who's looking at me with widened eyes and an expression of disbelief.
But when I look at Roman again, I'm sure he's just enjoying a last chance at fun, a pathetic show of bravado now that Damen is saved. "So, you want to go after me now? Is that it?" I say, fully prepared to take him down if I have to.
But he just shakes his head and laughs. "Now why would I want to do that? Why would I want to rid myself of a whole new brand of fun that's only just begun?"
I freeze, panic building inside me, but trying not to show it.
"I had no idea you'd be so easy, so predictable, but then again, that's love, right? It tends to make one a little bit crazy, a tad bit impulsive, even irrational, don't you think?"
I narrow my eyes, having no idea what he's going on and on about but knowing it can't be good.
"And yet, it's amazing how quickly you fell for it. No sales resistance at all. Seriously, Ever, you just sliced yourself open with, virtually no questions asked. Which goes back to my original point, never underestimate the power of love or, in your case, was it guilt? Only you know for sure."
I stare at him, a horrible understanding growing inside me, knowing I've made a grave mistake that I've somehow been played.
"You were just so desperate to trade your life for his, so willing to do anything to save him that it all went so seamlessly, so much easier than I ever expected.
Though truth be told, I know just how you feel. In fact, I would've done the same thing for Drina if only I'd been given the choice." He glares at me, his lids so narrowed his eyes are like angry slivers of darkness. "But, since we already know how that ended, I suppose you'd like to know how this ends too, right?"
I glance at Damen, ensuring he's still okay, watching him sleep as Roman says, "Yes, he's still alive, don't worry your pretty head about that. And just so you know, he'll most likely remain that way for many, many, many years to come. I have no plans to go after him again, so don't you fret. In fact, it was never my intention to kill either one of you, regardless of what you might've thought. Though, in all fairness, I suppose I should warn you that all this happiness does bear a cost."
"What is it?" I whisper, staring at Roman, having no idea what he could want besides Drina who's already gone. Besides, whatever the cost, I'll pay it. If it means getting Damen back, I'll do what it takes. "I see I've upset you," he coos, shaking his head. "Now I've already told you that Damen will be fine. In fact, more than fine. He'll be raring to go and better than ever. Just look at him, would you? See how his color's returned, how his form's bulking up? Very soon he'll be right back to that handsome, strapping young lad you've convinced yourself that you love so damn much you'd do anything to save him, no questions asked "
"Get to the point," I say, my eyes on his, annoyed by the way these immortal rogues always insist on making every single moment about them , "Oh no." He shakes his head. "I've waited years for this moment, and I will not be rushed. You see, Damen and I go way back. Back to the very beginning, in Florence, where we met." And when he sees my expression, he adds, "Yes, I was a fellow orphan, the youngest orphan, and when he spared me from the plague I looked to him like a father." "Which would make Drina your mother?" I say, watching his gaze harden before relaxing again. "Hardly." He smiles. "You see, I loved Drina, I'm not afraid to admit it. I loved her with all of my heart. I loved her in the same way you think you love him." He motions toward Damen, who's returned to the way he was when we met. "I loved her with every ounce of my being, I would've done anything for her and I never would've abandoned her like you did with him." I swallow hard, knowing I deserve that.
"But it was always about Damen. Always. About. Damen. That's all she could focus on. All she could see. Until he met you the first timeand Drina turned to me." He smiles briefly, but it quickly fades when he says, "For friendship," practically spitting the word. "And companionship. And a big strong shoulder to cry on." He scowls. "I would've given her anything she wantedanything in the worldbut she already had everythingand all she wanted was the one thing I couldn't give her, wouldn't give herDamen. Sodding. Auguste." He shakes his head. "And unfortunately for Drina, Damen only wanted you. And so it begana love triangle that lasted four hundred years, each of us relentless, driven, never once giving up hope, until I was forced tobecause you killed her. Guaranteeing we'd never be together. Guaranteeing our love would never be known"
"You knew I killed her?" I gasp, my stomach twisting into a horrible knot. "This whole time?" He rolls his eyes. "Well, duh !" He laughs, performing a perfect imitation of Stacia at her brattiest. "I had it all planned, though I must say, you really threw me for a loop when you abandoned him like that. I underestimated you, Ever. I truly did. But even so, I held on to my plans, I told Ava you'd be back." Ava.
I look at him, my eyes wide, not sure I want to know what happened to the one person I thought I could trust.
"Ah, yes, your good friend Ava. The only one you could count on, right?" He nods. "Well, as it turns out, she gave me a reading once, quite a good one too I might say, and well, we kept in touch. You know she practically fled town the moment you left? Took all the elixir too. Left Damen alone in this room, vulnerable, defenseless, just waiting for me. Didn't even stick around long enough to see if your little theory was true figuring you were long gone, so, either way, you'd never know the difference. You know, you really should be more careful about who you trust, Ever. You shouldn't be so naive." I swallow hard and shrug. There's nothing I can do about it now. I can't take it back, I can't change the past, the only thing I can change now is what happens next.
"Oh, and I loved how you kept peering at my wrist, searching for my Ouroboros tattoo." He laughs.
"Little did you realize we wear them wherever we choose, so I chose my neck."
I stand there silently, hoping to hear more. Damen didn't even know there were immortal rogues until Drina went bad.
"I started it." He nods, his right hand over his heart.
"I'm the founding father of the Immortal Rogue tribe.
While it's true that your friend Damen gave us all the first drink, when the effects began to wear off, he left us to age and wither, refusing to give us more."
I shrug and roll my eyes. Granting someone over a century's worth of living is hardly what I'd call selfish.
"And that's when I started experimenting, learning from the world's greatest alchemists until I'd surpassed Damen's work."
"You call that a triumph? Turning evil? Taking and giving life at will? Playing God ?"
"I do what I have to." He shrugs, inspecting his nails.
"At least I didn't leave the remaining orphans to shrivel. Unlike Damen, I cared enough to track them down and save them. And yeah, every now and then I recruit someone new. Though I assure you there's no harm done to the innocent, only to those who deserve it,"
Our eyes meet, but I quickly look away. Damen and I should've seen this coming, shouldn't have assumed Drina was the end.
"So imagine my surprise when I show up here only to find this littleurchinhuddling with Damen in her little magick circle, while her creepy twin runs around town, trying to piece an antidote together before nightfall." Roman laughs. "Quite a successful search too, I might add. You should've waited, Ever. You shouldn't have broken the circle. Those two deserve far more credit than you were willing to give them, but then, as I said, you do have a tendency to trust the wrong ones. Anyway, meanwhile back at the bungalow, I just kicked around here, waiting for you to show up and break the protective seal, like I knew you would."
"Why?" I gaze at Damen, then over at Rayne, still huddled in the corner, too frightened to move. "What difference does it make?"
"Well, it is what killed him." He shrugs. "He could've lived for days had you not broken through like that.
Lucky for you I had the antidote on hand to bring him back. And even though there's a price, a huge hefty price, what's done is done, right? And now there's no going back. No. Going. Back You understand that better than any of us now, don't you?"
"Enough," I say, my hands curled into fists. Thinking I should get rid of him now, eliminate him for good. I mean, Damen's safe, Roman's not needed, so what harm could it do?
Except that I can't. It's not right. I mean, Damen is safe. And I can't just go eliminating people just because I deem them no good. I can't abuse my power that way. Much is expected to those given much, and all that.
I relax my fists, unfolding my fingers as he says, "That's a wise choice. You don't want to do anything too rash, even though soon you'll be tempted. Because you see, Ever, while Damen's going to be fine, perfectly fine and healthy and basically everything you could ever want him to be, I'm. afraid that's just going to make it all the more difficult when you realize you can never be together."
I look at him, my fingers shaking, my eyes blazing, refusing to believe him Damen's going to live I'm going to liveso what could possibly keep us apart? "Don't believe me?" He shrugs. "Fine, go ahead, consummate your love and find out. It's not like I care. My loyalties to Damen ended centuries ago. So I'll have absolutely no qualms when you jump his bones and he ends up dead." He smiles, his eyes right on mine, and when he sees the incredulous look on my face, his smile grows into a laugh. A laugh so large it reaches toward the ceiling and shakes the walls of this room, before it settles all around us like a blanket of doom.
"Have I ever lied to you, Ever? Go ahead, think about it. I'll wait. Haven't I been truthful all along? Oh, sure I may have saved a few of the smaller, insignificant details for last, which, though it may be quite naughty of me, really does add to the fun. But now, it seems we've come to the point of full disclosure, so I'd like to make it clear, crystal clear, that the two of you can never be together. No DNA exchange whatsoever. And in case you still don't get what that means, then allow me to spell it out by stating that no bodily fluids of any kind may ever be exchanged. And just in case you need a translation of that, well, it means you can't kiss, lick, spit into each other's mouths, share each other's elixir oh, and of course, you also can't do what's yet to be done. Hell, you can't even cry on his shoulder over the fact that you can't do what's yet to be done. In short, you can't do anything. Or at least not with each other. Because if you do, Damen will die."
"I don't believe you," I say, my heart racing, my palms slick with sweat. "How is that even possible?" "Well, I may not be a doctor or scientist by profession, but I did study with some of the greats back in the day. Do Albert Einstein, Max Planck, Sir Isaac Newton, or Galileo mean anything to you?" I shrug, wishing he'd stop name-dropping and get on with it already.
"So, in the simplest terms, allow me to say that while the antidote alone would've saved him by stopping the receptors from multiplying additional aged and damaged cells, the moment we added your blood, we made sure that any future reintroduction of your DNA will only cause them to go active again, thereby reversing the entire process and killing him. But we don't need to go all Science Channel here, just know that you can never be together again. Never. Understood? Because if you do, Damen dies. And now that I've told you the rest is up to you." I stare at the ground, wondering what I've done, how I could've been stupid enough to trust him. Barely listening when he says, "And if you don't believe me, then go ahead, hop on board and give it a try. But when he keels over, don't come crying to me." Our eyes lock, and just like that day at the lunch tables at school, I'm sucked inside the abyss of his mind. Feeling his longing for Drina, her longing for Damen, his longing for me, my longing for home, and knowing it's all resulted in this.
I shake my head, wrenching myself from his grip as he says, "Oh, look, he's waking! And looking as gorgeous and hunky as ever. Enjoy your reunion, darlin', but remember, don't enjoy it too much!"
I glance over my shoulder, seeing Damen beginning to stir, stretching his body and rubbing his eyes, then I lunge for Roman, wanting to hurt him, destroy him, make him pay for all that he did.
But he just laughs and dances out of my way, heading for the door and smiling as he says, ''Trust me, you don't want to do that. You just might need me someday."
I stand before him, shaking with rage, tempted to plunge my fist into his most vulnerable chakra and watch him vanish forever.
"I know you don't believe it now, but why don't you take a moment to think about it. Now that you can no longer cuddle with Damen, you're about to become very lonely, very quickly. And since I pride myself on being the forgiving type, I'd be more than willing to fill your void."