Eclipse - Кейт Тирнан 8 стр.

We sat in the darkness like that for another hour until we heard Killian crashing through the woods, and then he emerged through the cedars and pines.

Hey, sis, he said cheerfully, and it was clear hed been drinking. Greathed driven here from Poughkeepsie. He ignored Hunter, which wasnt unusual.

Killian, I whispered. I had no idea what to saywords didnt cover this situation. I motioned over to where Ciaran lay on the ground.

If I had seen my real father, Sean Rowlands, lying on the ground in the woods in the middle of the night, I would have run over immediately. But Killian wasnt me, and Ciaran wasnt anything like my real father, so instead Killian just gaped at him.

Whats happened, then? he asked.

Amyranth has been casting dark wave spells, I said tonelessly. Ciaran wanted me to join him and Amyranth. I said no. So he decided to bring the dark wave on Kithic. I met him here tonight, and then a group of five witches stripped him of his powers.

Killians eyes widened almost comically. He couldnt even think of what to ask or say, just kept looking from me to Hunter to Ciaran in astonishment.

No, he finally said, all traces of alcohol gone from his voice. He has no powers? Are you sure?

Were sure, Hunter said, not sounding proud about it.

You stripped Da of his powers. Ciaran MacEwan.

I understood why he was having a hard time with it. Ciaran seemed invincibleunless you knew his true name.

Can you please take him to a safe place until hes better? I asked.

Killian still seemed unsure whether or not this was reality. Aye, he said hesitantly. Aye. I know a place.

Ill help you get him to your car, said Hunter. Watch him closely. Hell be very weak for a while, but when hes able to move, he might... hurt himself.

Aye, said Killian, slowly absorbing the meaning of Hunters words. He gave me a quick backward glance, then walked over to the father he had feared and respected. Alyce edged back to give him room. Killian put a hand on Ciarans shoulder and flinched when he saw Ciarans face. I looked away. Then Hunter and Killian walked away through the woods, supporting Ciaran between them.

Alyce got up slowly and came to sit by me. It was a hard thing, my dear, she said.

It hurts, I said inadequately.

It needs to hurt, Morgan, she said gently, rubbing my back. If you had done this without it hurting, you would be a monster.

Like Ciaran, I thought. Hunter came back, alone. Alyce kissed my cheek and left, going back through the woods the way she had come. With only Hunter as my witness, I let go and began to cry. He sat down next to me and put his arms around me, hard and familiar. I leaned against him and sobbed until I thought I would make myself sick. And still there was pain inside.

Morgan, Morgan, Hunter barely murmured. I love you. I love you. It will be all right.

I had no idea how he could say that.

12. Alisa

By five oclock in the morning, I was totally ready to freak. Where the hell had Hunter and his father gone? Why werent they back? It was going to be dawn soon, and I was supposed to be home! Any minute now, Hilary would be getting up for her.

I was stalking around their house, too worried and upset to be tired, though my body felt like Id been up for days. Should I call a taxi? Waitthis was Widows Vale. There was no taxi service at five in the morning. I would have to wake someone up to come get me. This sucked!

I was trying to decide if I should just start walking when I heard heavy footsteps on the front porch. I almost flew to the door, just in time to see Hunter and Mr. Niall came in. They looked like someone had taken all the blood out of them while they were out.

Are you okay? I blurted. Whats wrong? Where were you?

Hunter nodded, then patted his father on the back as Mr. Niall passed us, then headed slowly upstairs, his tread lifeless. Im sorry, Alisa, Hunter said. I had no idea it would take so long. Do you need to get home?

Yesbut whats happened? Are you okay?

Im all right. Morgans waiting outsideshell give you a ride.

Morgan?

He nodded, rubbing his hands over his face, pressing gently on his eyes. Yes. Tonight Morgan met Ciaran MacEwanwe told you about himout at the power sink. You know, that old Methodist cemetery at the edge of town. Things got strange, and then Morgan ended up putting a binding spell on him. She called me and my da, and we went out there, and we got some other witches, and we stripped Ciaran of his powers.

I stared at him. You just stripped Ciaran of his powers? Just now?

Yes. It was very hardCiaran was incredibly powerful, and he resisted strongly. It was especially hard on Morgan.

I could hardly take it all in. What does this mean about the dark wave?

Hunter gave a wry smile, and I could tell all he wanted to do was drop onto his bed and sleep for a year. I would guess there wont be a dark wave now, he said. Looks like youre off the hookyou wont have to torture yourself with this spell anymore.

It took a moment for the words to sink in. I cant believe its all over, I said, getting into my coat. I had been working so hardwe all had. And it had been for nothing. I mean, I was glad there wouldnt be a dark wave coming, but at the same time, in a way I had been almost looking forward to seeing how well I did. Call me self-centered.

My adrenaline started to ebb, and suddenly I could hardly lift my feet enough to walk to the door. I looked back at Hunter, drawn and pale in the harsh overhead light of the living room. Was it very bad?

He nodded and looked down at the scarred wooden floor. It was very bad.

Ill talk to you soon, I said softly. Take care of yourself. I gently closed the door behind me and walked across the front porch and out to the street, where Morgan was waiting in her big old car. Hunter and his father had looked awful. I wished there was something I could do for them. Maybe later today I would try to bring them something. What would be good in this situation? Chicken soup?

The door was unlocked and the engine still running when I got in. I looked over at Morgan. Hi, I said quietly. It sounds like you guys had a really hard time.

She inclined her head a tiny bit, then put the car into gear and pulled away from the curb. I sneaked another glance at her. Morgan usually looked pretty natural, not too spiffed up, but tonight she looked terrible. Like she had literally been through hell.

Im sorry, Morgan, I said. Im sorry tonight was so hard, and Im sorry for how Ive acted toward you the past couple of months. I wish... I wish I could help you somehow.

She looked over at me, a pale slash from a streetlight bisecting her face. The edges of her mouth curved in a tiny acknowledgment, and then we turned the corner onto my street. She stopped a few houses away and looked at me expectantly, like she was waiting for me to get out. Um, should I get out here? I asked, grabbing my purse.

Morgan nodded. So your dad doesnt hear the car.

Ohhh. Very wise, I thought. Youre good at this, I said in admiration, and she let out a little laugh that sounded like broken glass.

I opened the door as quietly as I could and stepped out onto the silent street. When I turned back to whisper thanks, I saw that Morgans face was shiny with tear tracks. Im sorry, I whispered. It was all I could think to say. She gave a small nod and put the car back into drive.Very slowly, she turned around and headed back toward her house.

The morning air was still and heavy as I walked over to my house. It was that last moment of quiet before the early risers get up; I felt like I could breathe in the peaceful sleep of my family and my neighbors and the whole town. After silently making my way to my room, I kicked off my shoes and looked for just a minute out the window. The rim of the horizon was just barely highlighted with pink: the dawn of a new day.

I woke up later that same morning, not even caring how late I was for school. When I went downstairs Hilary looked up in surprise from the yoga mat she had spread on the living room floor. She glanced at the mantel clock, then looked thoughtful.

Its Friday, isnt it? she said. Arent you supposed to be in school?

Yeah, I said wearily, collapsing on the couch.

Are you sick again, or did you and your friend stay up too late talking on the phone?

Im sick again.

She uncoiled herself and came to look at me. She wasnt wearing makeup, and somehow she looked both younger and older than twenty-five. I wondered what it was that made my dad so crazy about her. Reaching out, she pressed her hand against my forehead.

Hm. Well, I guess I should call the school.

Thanks, I said, not having expected her cooperation. It had never occurred to me that my twenty-five-year-old stepmother-to-be would actually have the authority to do stuff like this.

Why dont you go back upstairs and get into bed? Do you need anything?

No thanks. I hauled myself up and headed to my room as I heard her dialing the schools number.

When I woke up again later, I heard light footsteps in the hall. Hilary tapped on my door and opened it. Are you awake?

Uh-huh. The open eyes are always a good clue.

Its past lunch. Are you hungry?

I thought.Uh-huh.

Come on downstairs and Ill fix you some nice sardines on crackers, she said, and I stared at her in horror before I noticed she had an evil grin on her face.

I couldnt help smiling back. Good one.

In the kitchen I fixed myself a PB&J, poured some juice, and sat down.

Hilary sat down across from me. I sighed but tried to hide it behind the sandwich. As much as I didnt want to admit it, she was going to be part of my life. And so was my half sibling. So I should probably make an effort to get along better. I should also ask my doctor for a prescription for Prozac. That could help.

Hows school going? she asked, destroying all my good intentions.

I looked at her matter-of-factly. Its high school. It sucks. I waited for her to tell me about how it had been the most wonderful four years of her life, how she was captain of the pep squad

Yeah. Mine sucked, too, she said, and my mouth dropped open. I hated it. I thought it was so stupid and pointless. I mean, I liked a couple of classes, when I had good teachers. And I liked seeing my friends. But you couldnt pay me to go back. It didnt seem to have anything to do with real life.

She was warming to her topic. I stared at this new Hilary in fascination, chewing my sandwich.

You know what real life is? she went on. Knowing how to make change from a dollar. Knowing that virtually everything is alphabetized. Thats real life.

What about mortgages, life insurance, lawn care? I asked.

You pick that stuff up as you go along. They dont teach that in school, anyway. Now, college was different, I have to say. College was cool. You could control what you wanted to study and when. You could decide to go to class or not, and no one would hassle you. I looooved college. I took tons of lit and art courses, and fun stuff like womens studies and comparative religion.

What did you graduate with?

A basic liberal arts degree, a bachelors. Nothing useful for a job or anything. She laughed. It would have been better if I had studied to be an accountant. She put her arms over her head and stretched. Which is why Im doing medical transcription from home. It requires knowing how to listen, read, and type. And I can set my own hours, and the money isnt bad, and Ill be able to do it after the babys born.

Is that what youre doing on the computer all the time? I had thought she was writing a romance novel or having an Internet relationship or something.

Yeah. Which reminds me. I need to get back to it. Right after Life and Love. Want to watch?

Okay. I felt compelled to follow this new, body-snatched Hilary. I wondered what they had done with the real Hilary and decided it didnt matter. We sat on the couch in the family room together and she filled me in on her favorite soap.

I watched it mindlessly, enjoying having an hour from my life gone, an hour in which I didnt have to think about magick and witches and breaking things and dark waves. I looked around the house, at Hilary, thought about my dad coming home. His face always lit up when he saw Hilary and me. That was cool. Thank God they werent going to get wiped out by magick anytime soon.

13. Morgan

I slept all day but awoke at five in the afternoon, feeling just as crappy as when Id gone to sleep. I heard Mary K. coming through the bathroom door and sat up to see her.

Are you all right? she asked, looking concerned. Have you been in bed all day?

I nodded. I think Ill get up and take a shower now.

Is this the flu or what? Alisa was out sick today, too.

I guess its just some bug thats going around, I said lamely. I didnt know what Alisa had told my sister, if anything, and didnt want to blow it for her.

Well, come downstairs if you want dinner. Its little steaks and baked potatoes. And Aunt Eileen and Paula are coming.

I nodded, then pushed my way into the bathroom and shut both doors. I felt heavy and unrested, the knowledge of what I had done the night before weighing me down. My family was having one of my favorite meals, and I always loved seeing my aunt and her girlfriend. But right now the thought of food made my stomach roil, and I didnt feel up to talking to anyone. Maybe I would just go back to bed after my shower.

I made the water as hot as I could stand it and let it rain down on my neck and shoulders. Quietly I started to cry, leaning against the shower wall, my eyes closed against the splashing water. Oh, Goddess, I thought. Goddess. Get me through this. What did I do?

I saved my family, my friends, my coven.

At the expense of my father.

I had seen Ciaran after the rite. He looked dead. And I knew him well enough to know that living without magick would surely drive him insane. I had heard that a witch living without magick was like a person living a half existence, in a world where colors were grayed, scents were dulled, taste was almost nonexistent. Where your hands felt covered by plastic gloves, so when you touched things, you couldnt feel their texture, their vibrations.

That was what I had done to my father last night.

He killed your mother. Hes killed hundreds of people, witches and humans. Woman, man, and child. Just like Hunter said.

I doubted that Ciaran would be alive for long. As far as I knew, there was no rite to give him his magick back it had been ripped from him forever. And without magick, I doubted Ciaran would feel that life was worth living.

Now he was virtually harmless, and the dark wave wasnt going to come. Not this time. I hoped I would start feeling better soon, either physically or emotionally. I would take either one. My mind was bleeding with pain and guilt and relief, and my body felt like I had fallen on rocks, again and again and again.

After my shower, I got back into bed.

It wasnt long before Mom came upstairs. She sat carefully on the side of my bed and felt my forehead. You dont feel hot, but you certainly look sick.

Thanks.

Does your stomach hurt?

No. Just my psyche.

Okay. How about I fix you a little tray and bring it up?

I nodded, trying not to cry. Mom was still in her work clothes, and she looked tired. I was almost an adult, seventeen years old, yet all I wanted right now was for my mom to take care of me, to keep me safe. I never wanted to get out of of this bed or leave this house again.

After Mom left, Aunt Eileen and Paula came in. Paula had completely recovered from her nasty ice-skating accident and was back at work.

Big test today? Aunt Eileen inquired with a smile.

O ye of little faith.

Paula came over and felt my nose. Youre fine.

Ha-ha. Shes a vet.

You look like death warmed over, honey, said my favorite aunt. You need anything? Can we bring you something?

I shook my head, and then Mom was back with my tray. I looked at the food. It was all cut up into little pieces, and I started to cry.

Morgan, can you talk on the phone? Mary K. asked an hour later. Its Hunter.

I nodded, and she brought the cordless phone in and gave it to me. Hello, my love, he said, and my heart hurt. How are you doing?

Not great. How are you?

Bloody awful. Did you get any sleep today?

I slept, but it didnt help.

There were a few moments of silence, and I knew what was coming. MorganI wish you had told me you knew his true name. I thought we trusted each other.

Unexpectedly I felt a little spark of irritation. If youre pissed, say youre pissed. Dont try to make me feel guilty about my decisions.

Im not trying to make you feel guilty, he said more strongly. I just thought we had total trust and honesty between us.

The way I trusted you when you were in Canada?

Long silence. I guess we have a ways to go.

I guess we do. I felt upset at what that implied, for both of us.

Well, I want to work to get there, he said, surprising me. I want us to grow closer, to earn each others trust, to be able to count on each other more than we count on other people. I do want us to have total trust and honesty between us. Thats how I want us to be.

You are perfection, I thought, calming right down. Id like that, too.

For a moment I just basked in the glow of having Hunter. It was justhes my father. I was probably the only person in the whole world who knew his true name, except him. And he knew I had it. I felt I had to keep it close to myself, in case I ever needed it, for me or for you. Not for the council.

He knew that you had his true name?

He must have. I used it the night we... shape-shifted, to stop him. Thats why he disappeared, when what he really wanted to do was kill you or me or both.

Yet he met you at the power sink.

I guess he trusted me or was sure he was stronger than me... I gave a brittle laugh. He was stronger than me. Many times stronger than me. But he shouldnt have trusted me. Hot tears slipped from my eyes and rolled down my cheeks.

Morgan, you know you did the right thingnot only for you, me, and the others he would have hurt, but also for Ciaran. For every evil he did, three times that was coming back to him. Youve prevented him from making that any worse.

Thats one way of looking at it, I said. I dont know. Nothing is ever black or white. Decisions are never crystal clear.

No. What you did last night was not one hundred percent good, but certainly not one hundred percent bad. But on the whole it was much more good than bad. On the whole, you honored the Goddess much more than you dishonored her. And thats sometimes as much as we can hope for.

I wish I could see you, I said, feeling his soothing words taking away some of my jagged edges. But Im a wreck, and Im sure Mom wouldnt let me out after Ive been in bed all day.

You just rest up, Hunter said. We can get together tomorrow. Id like to get away from here, if possiblemy das driving me mad. Hes going mental because I dont want to have anything to do with the council anymore.

What? What do you mean?

I dont trust them anymore. I cant put my faith in them. I cant do as they ask simply because they ask. I cant turn to them for protection. Not only are they no use to me, theyve actually been dangerous for me. And for you. And for Da, though he doesnt see it that way.

Can you quit being a Seeker? Is that allowed?

Hunter gave a short laugh. It doesnt happen frequently, thats certain. I havent talked to anyone officially about it yetDas still trying to talk me out of it. But in my heart I know this is what I want to do.

I was stunned. Hunters dissatisfaction with the council had been building for a while, but it had never occurred to me that he would quit being a Seeker. It was what he was; it was a huge part of what defined him.

Whoa, I said. If youre not a Seeker, what will you do?

I dont know, he admitted. Ive never done anything else, and no one besides the council needs a Seeker. Ill have to think about it. But how do you feel about it, my quitting?

I think you should do whatever you feel like you need to do, I said. You could do anything you want. Ill help you do anything you want.

Oh, Morgan, that means so much to me, he said, sounding relieved. You have no idea. If youll support me, Ill take on anyone. He paused. Theyre not going to want me to quit, he explained.

I know. Lets talk about it tomorrow, in person, I said. This could be good. This could be very exciting. I want to look toward the future instead of dreading everything in the present.

Im with you there, Hunter said. Now I guess Ill go try to avoid Da. Goddess, fathers can be a pain in the arse.

Yes, they can, I said with dry irony.

See you tomorrow, my love.

Tomorrow.

Morgan, maybe you would feel better if you ate an actual breakfast, said Mary K., sitting across from me at the kitchen table.

I looked up, bleary-eyed. It was starting to seem that maybe I really did have the flu. I still felt awful, with bone-deep aches, a pounding headache, and lingering nausea. I had staggered down to the kitchen, grabbed a regular Coke for its medicinal properties, and now felt a tiny bit better.

Its settling my stomach.

Theres some oatmeal left. Its got raisins in it. Mary K. took a healthy bite of her banana and gave me a perky, bright-eyed look. That was how she was. She wasnt even trying to be this way. This morning, even though she hadnt taken a shower yet, she looked fresh and clean, with perfect skin and shiny hair. I hadnt taken a shower, either, and I could scare small children.

No, thank you.Where are Mom and Dad?

Dads downstairs, rebuilding his motherboard. Mom had to show some houses. And I am going to Jaycees, as soon as you give me a ride. She gave me a simpering smile and batted her eyelashes at me, and I couldnt help laughing.

Okay. Let me get a grip.

An hour later I dropped her at Jaycees house, then swung around and headed for Hunters. The shower had helped, and then I had taken three Tylenol. Now Id had a second Coke and a piece of toast here in the car, and I hoped that something Id done would start to help soon.

It was better, though, walking up to Hunters front door without feeling like I had to be looking over my shoulder. I had no idea whether Amyranth would take up Ciarans cause, but I had the feeling that this had been a purely personal thing. I might not matter to them at all.

The front door opened. Hi, said Hunter.

I blinked when I saw him. Do you still feel bad? You look awful.

He rubbed his hand over his unshaven jaw. Unlike the hair on his head, which was the color of sunlight, his beard was dark, and so was his chest hair. Which I was going to stop thinking about immediately.

He shrugged and I went past him, automatically heading for the fireplace in the living room. I dropped my coat and sank onto the couch, stretching my feet toward the flames. The house smelled pleasantly smoky, clean. Fire has great purifying qualities.

I think I feel better than I did yesterday, he said, sitting next to me so our legs touched. Maybe it just takes a while. Ive never been around a dark wave before, so I dont know.

I leaned my head against his shoulder and shivered at the warmth I found there. Maybe you havent drunk enough tea, I said with a straight face.

Quite the wit, arent you? He put his arms around me and we snuggled, taking comfort from being close.

Wheres your dad? Please be out of the house. Please be gone all day.

Getting groceries. Theres nothing to eat because weve been kind of busy the last few days.

I pushed against Hunters shoulder so he would fall sideways. Perfect.

Good idea, he said, sliding down and pulling me with him. Then we were lying on the couch, face-to-face, pressed together, and my entire back was toasting nicely from the fire.

Simultaneously we both made happy sounds, then laughed at ourselves. I didnt feel like making out, sadly enough, and neither did he, and instead we just held each other close, snuggling hard, feeling some of our aches disappear with the heat from each others body. Goddess, if I could just lie like this forever. Hunters hand stroked my back absently; our eyes were closed, and I had my arms around his waist, not even caring that one was getting smushed.

Thursday was so awful, I murmured against his chest. I dont think Ill ever get over it. No matter how much good I was doing, I still know I betrayed my father. And despite how bad he was, there was something in him that I felt I knew, something good, from long ago. That was the part of him I liked.

I understand. Hunters warm breath stirred my hair. The only thing that will make you feel better is time. Give yourself time. I promise there will be a day when it doesnt hurt so much.

I felt tears behind my eyelids but didnt let them out. I was tired of crying, of being in pain. I wanted to lie here and feel safe and loved and warm.

Mmm, I hummed, moving closer to him. This feels so great. I needed this.

It wasnt long until we felt Hunters father come home, and we sat up as if we had been discussing the weather the whole time. Im sure Mr. Niall was fooled.

Hunter helped him carry the groceries into the kitchen. When I saw Mr. Nialls face, I thought he looked even older and grayer than usual, which was saying something. However, when he saw me, he actually nodded and said, Hullo, Morgan. Hope youre feeling better. So he had softened up to me. Maybe I should write an article for a teen magazine about how to win over your boyfriends parents. But I guess most girls wouldnt have my same setup.

Whats in here, Da? Hunter said, his arms full. This weighs a ton.

I thought you were supposed to be so strong, said Mr. Niall snidely, and my eyebrows went up.

I am strong; I just dont know why they sell lead weights at the grocery store, thats all.

Their bickering continued as they went into the kitchen, and it was still going on when they came out. I frowned, thinking. Then I glanced at the potted winter cactus by the window. It had been blooming last week. Now it was dead. My heart sank, and a cold feeling came over me. Oh, no. Oh, no. I stood up and went over to them, looking closely at their faces.

What, Morgan? Hunter asked.

Iwe all feel horrible. You guys are arguing. That plant is dead. I was too upset to make sense, but it took them only a moment to get it.

Oh, Goddess, Hunter breathed.

Of course. Mr. Niall shook his head. I knew something was wrongI just couldnt see what. But youre right. I know you are.

Hunter muttered a word that I was never allowed to use. Too right, he said. The dark wave is still coming. Either Ciaran cast it before he came to see you, or Amyranth is continuing his work without him.

Call Alisa, said Mr. Niall grimly.

14. Alisa

It seemed that every time I looked out a window, it was darker outside, more ominous. Mr. Niall had turned on the radio in the kitchen, and every once in a while we heard faint weather reports about a bad early-spring storm coming, how unusual it was. They joked about how it was March, still roaring in like a lion, ha-ha. It had all seemed so unreal. How could the world be going on as usual when I knew that mine might end at any minute?