"Because I'm a Seeker," Hunter said. "It's my job to investigate misuses of magick."
"This doesn't have anything to do with magick," I said, standing up. "Maybe there was a stock split and Alton's secretary was at lunch when the call came in. Maybe he got the news by e-mail. Maybe there was no stock split but Afton forgave the debt anyway, out of the simple goodness of his heart. This isn't council business, Hunter."
"Open your eyes," Hunter said flatly. "There's magick involved here. Dark magick. We both know that."
I realized I had no choice. I had to tell him about seeing Cal.
I took a deep breath. "There's something I have to tell you."
I explained how I'd scryed for the truth two nights ago and how instead of seeing David, Cal had appeared. I didn't speak about the feelings seeing Cal's face had induced, nor did Hunter ask. But two white creases appeared on the out-sides of his nostrils.
"The way I see it, this is the strongest proof we've had yet that Cal is behind the dark magick we've detected," I said. "It isn't David at all."
I could see Hunter weighing this new information. "You say you asked to see the truth?" he asked after a moment "Were those the words you used? Did you mention David's name?"
"No," I answered, puzzled. "Why?"
"You weren't very specific. And fire can be a capricious scrying tool," Hunter replied.
"Are you trying to tell me the fire lied to me?" I asked. I was starting to get angry again.
"No," Hunter said. "Fire doesn't lie. But it reveals the truths it wants to reveal, especially if you're not specific with your questions."
I put my head in my hands, feeling suddenly weary. "I don't get it, Hunter," I said. "I keep giving you clues that point clearly to Cal and Selene, the witches you came here to investigatethe witches you're still trying to track down. I don't want it to be themI don't want to even think about them. But it makes total sense that they're the ones whose presence I felt. Why do you keep trying to make this about David and Practical Magick?"
Hunter was silent for a moment. At last he said, "It's a feeling I have. I've got an instinct for darkness. It's what makes me so good at my job." The words weren't a boast. His voice was quiet. For the first time I began to really wonder. Was it possible that he was right?
"Enough of this," he said with a sigh. "We're not getting anywhere, and it's nearly six. I'd better run you home."
We walked out to his car without talking. I noticed with a shock that it was the same gray rental sedan he'd had the week before. Selene had hidden it in an abandoned barn when she thought Cal and I had killed Hunter.
"I tracked it down," Hunter remarked, eerily echoing what was on my mind. We climbed into the car, and he drove me home in silence, each lost in our own thoughts. He pulled into my driveway. Then, as I reached for the door handle, he put his hand on mine. "Morgan."
A jolt of sensation ran up my arm, and I turned to face him.
"Please think about what we discussed, about David. I'm almost certain Stuart Afton didn't forgive that debt out of kindness."
"I just don't believe David would mess with dark magick," I said. As he began to reply, I cut him off. "I know, I know, you have a special sense for evil. But you're wrong this time. You have to be."
I climbed out and hurried up the walk to my house, hoping I was right.
14. Old Wounds
Beltane, 1996
We are in Vienna, where I have found work tutoring college students in English. Evenings, Fiona and I walk along the Danude or in the Stefansplatz. She had gained some much needed weight and is looking better. The other night we even went on the Ferris wheel in the Volksprater. But the amusement park made us think of the children. Have Beck and Shelagh ever taken them to such a place?
Giomanach is now thirteen. Linden almost twelve, and Alwyn, nine. I wonder when they look like.
Maghach
At dinner Mom reported that so far there had been no new incidents at Aunt Eileen and Paula's house. "They're hoping that those creeps saw the police show up at the house and have backed off."
"I hope so," I said. I reminded myself to get to Practical Magick for those ingredients soon.
Mom dished out some goulash and handed me the plate. "Will you be able to finish inputting our real estate listings this week?" she asked.
"I'm getting Das Boot back tomorrow afternoon," I said. "So I can stop by your office around three-thirty, after I drop Mary K. at home."
"I forgot to tell you. I'm not coming straight home tomorrow after school," said Mary K. "I'm going shopping with Olivia and Darcy."
Shopping. I wasn't ordinarily a big fan of shopping, but suddenly I felt a sharp pang of envy. How long had it been since I'd gone shopping with my friends or just hung out after school, doing nothing in particular?
Since you and Bree stopped being friends, I answered myself.
After dinner I went upstairs and tried to do my math homework, but my brain was too overloaded with thoughts of Hunter, Cal, David. I sighed. With its connection to the harmony of nature, Wicca was about balance, something I sorely needed. I had to bring balance back into my life, and the only way I could think of doing that was with a healthy dose of non-Wicca normalcy.
Surprising myself, I opened my door and padded out into the hall, where I picked up the phone. I took it back into my room and perched cross-legged on my bed.
My heart pounded as I dialed Bree's number. It had been so long since I'd done this. Would she want to talk to me?
Bree picked up on the third ring. "Hi, it's Morgan," I said quickly, before my nerve failed me.
"Hi." She sounded uneasy. "What's up?"
"Um" I hadn't thought this through. "Not a whole lot. I just. . you know, wanted to say hi. Catch up."
"Oh. Well, hi," she said.
Then we had one of those long, awkward silences, and I wondered if maybe it was crazy of me to have called her. Maybe she didn't want to be friends with me anymore. Maybe there was just too much water under the bridge.
I was about to mumble that I had to go when she spoke. "Morgan." She hesitated. "Some of things I did to youI know they really hurt. I can't undo them. But I'm really sorry. I was a complete bitch."
"II was, too," I admitted.
Another silence. Clearly neither one of us wanted to go into the details. It was still too raw to bring all that up again.
"So," she said, "what's been happening in your life? Robbie told mewell, he told me about your being adopted. About being a blood witch."
"He did?" I tried to decide how I felt about Bree and Robbie discussing my personal life.
"Yeah. I've been wanting to talk to you about it. If you want to," she said.
"I've been wanting to talk to you about it, too," I confessed. "But when we're face-to-face. Not on the phone."
"Okay," she said. "I'd like that."
"Meanwhile Hunter's got me in a Wicca study intensive," I told her. "You know, he's taken over the leadership of Cirrus now that. ." I trailed off. Now that Cal's gone, I thought. Quickly changing the subject, I asked, "How's Kithic? How is it having Sky lead a coven?"
"Challenging," Bree said in a thoughtful tone. "We've been doing visualization exercises. At our last circle we were outside under the moon, and Sky told us to visualize a pentagram. At first everyone was distracted by the cold and the noise of cars going by. Finally, though, we got it together. We all closed our eyes, visualizing away, and there was this moment of absolute silence, then Sky told us to open our eyes, and there was this perfect pentagram, etched in the snow. It was amazing."
"Cool," I said enviously. It sounded like her coven was really growing. I leaned back against my pillows.
Bree's voice went conspiratorial. "Sky and Raven are flirting, I think. Isn't that wild?"
"Very wild." It was so easy to fall back into gossiping with Bree again. "I never figured Raven would turn out to be gay."
"I don't think she really is. I think she just really likes Sky. It's an attraction of opposites," Bree said with a laugh. There was another pause, but this time it didn't feel awkward. It was justnatural.
"Speaking of attractions," I ventured, "how's your love life?"
"Robbie." I heard a guarded note in her voice.
"Yeah," I said, hoping I hadn't shattered our new, fragile bond.
But Bree just sighed. "Well, it'sit's kind of weird," she said slowly. "I don't know. . we've been buddies forever, and now all of a sudden we're making out. I guess I'm just sort of taking it as it comes and seeing what happens." She gave a little laugh. "I have to say, though, we really click physically. It's very hot."
"Wow." I felt voyeuristic but also fascinated. It was strange to hear these two people I'd known since childhood talk about each other in these new, romantic terms.
"Listen, I've got to go," Bree said. "I've got a history paper due tomorrow, and I'm still on page one."
"You'll crank it out," I told her. "You always do."
"Yeah, I do, don't I," she replied. "I'll talk to you later, okay? AndMorgan?"
"What?"
"Thanks for calling," she said softly. "I know it couldn't have been easy to do."
"You're welcome," I said.
We hung up, and I replaced the phone on the hall table. I was smiling as I went back into my room, feeling happier than I had for days.
15. Threads
Imbolc, 1997
Imbolc is a day for light. Fiona reminds me that Imbolc means in the belly. in the womb of the Goddess, and celebrates the seeds hidden in the earth that are just beginning to stir. Even though it's dark and cold here in Helsinki, it's a day of hope, and we must light the sacred fire.
In England, among the covens, there are great bonfires. Here we lit candles throughout out small rented house. Then the two of us did a quiet ceremony as we fed kindling into our woodstove.
The cold is hard on Fiona. She is shivering and in pain. We can't live this far north for long. Where next, I wonder?
Maghach
After my conversation with Bree the night before, I felt so much better able to face the next day. I knew she and I still had many, many fences to mend, but for the first time it actually seemed possible.
"You're in a good mood," Mary K. commented as we were getting ready for school. "Is that because you were talking to Hunter on the phone last night?" she added, wiggling her eyebrows at me.
She shrieked as I threw a damp dish towel at her.
"It wasn't Hunter. If you must know," I said, grabbing my backpack, "I was talking to Bree."
Mary K. beamed at me. "That's great!" She knew how much my friendship with Bree meant to me. "Maybe now things will get back to normal around here."
Robbie honked outside. He was giving us another lift to school. I'd pick up Das Boot later, and then things really would get back to normal!
Just as I was slipping into my coat, the phone rang. My witch senses tingled. What could Hunter want so early in the day? I picked up the phone. "Hi, Hunter."
"Good morning."
"I can't really talk," I told him. "I'm on my way to school, and Robbie and Mary K. are waiting for me."
"I'll make this quick," he said. "I justI feel I need to prepare you. I know you're being loyal to David, and that's good. But I don't want you to be blind to dark forces just because you like him."
"I'm not," I said, stung. "Don't you think, after what Cal did to me, that I've learned my lesson? It just doesn't make sense to me, that's all. David's not like Selene or Cal. He's not power hungry. He's not even Woodbane."
He drew a long breath. "Listen, I told you how my brother, Linden, died. How he called up a dark spirit and it overpowered him."
That wasn't the whole story, I knew. When we'd joined our minds, I had learned that Hunter had been accused of causing Linden's death and had stood trial before the International Council of Witches. He'd been found innocent, but he still carried the pain of his loss and the conviction of his own guilt.
"I remember," I said.
"What I didn't tell you is that Linden had called up dark spirits many times before," Hunter went on. "After that first time, when he did it with meit was as if the door had been opened for him. He liked working dark magick. It spoke to him. But the first time, Morganthe first time we did it for the purest of reasons."
"And you think David did the same thing," I said. "You think he opened the door."
"I think it's possible, yes."
Robbie honked again outside. "I have to go," I told Hunter. "They're waiting for me."
"We'll talk more later," Hunter said.
"Fine. Whatever." I hung up and stared at the phone for a minute. I remembered my own pleasure when I fought off those horrible guys at Aunt Eileen and Paula's. I had enjoyed it. Did that count as dark magick? No. Even if I had felt a rush from it, I was defending people I loved against an attack. That couldn't be bad.
As I walked out to the car, I made a decision. I was going to prove that David was innocent. That Cal was the source of the evil energy Hunter was feeling. I'd go talk to Stuart Afton myself and get this all straightened out.
After school I called Stuart Alton's office to make an appointment. His secretary told me that he wasn't in the office. "Is he sick?" I asked.
She hesitated. "He's. . indisposed. He's been out since the middle of last week."
Something in her voice made me extend my witch senses. I picked up on strong confusion and unease. She didn't know what was wrong with her boss, I sensed, and that was very unusual.
It also occurred to me that I'd first sensed the dark presence in the middle of last week. Around the same time Afton had stopped coming into his office. Coincidence, I told myself.
There are no coincidences, my inner witch voice said. "Did Mr. Afton come into any large sums of money recently?" I asked on impulse.
"Not that I have any intention of answering a question like thatbut you're the second person to ask it in the last few days," the secretary said, sounding amazed. "What is going on?"
"I'm not sure," I said. "Thanks for your help."
I hung up and looked up Afton's home address. He lived in a fancy section of town, but one I could get to by bus. I didn't want Robbie to know what I was doing. Somehow I felt I needed to do this alone. I'd just take the bus back to pick up Das Boot.
The bus let me off a few blocks from Afton's house. The houses were enormous, with wide lawns. Even the snow I looked more elegant in this neighborhood. I walked fast, trying to stay warm, my breath forming a little fog in front of me.
I rang the bell and stamped my booted feet on the welcome mat Was I nuts coming here? Would Afton even see me? I heard footsteps on the other side of the door, and then it swung open. A thick woman in a maid's uniform looked at me. A wave of worry radiated from her.
"Yes?" she asked. "May I help you?"
"Uh," I said brilliantly. "I was wondering if I could talk to Mr. Afton?"
She pursed her lips, and I realized she looked pale. "Oh, dear, I'm sorry. Mr. Afton. . Mr. Afton. . was taken to the hospital earlier this morning."
"What?" I gasped.
She nodded. "The paramedics thought he'd had a stroke."
"II'm so sorry," I stammered. My heart thudded hard. It's just a coincidence. It has nothing to do with magick, I told myself.
A crumpled shopping bag sitting in the hallway behind her caught my eye. It seemed so out of place, just lying there, as if perhaps Mr. Afton had been holding it when he'd suffered from his stroke. The forest green color and silver handles looked familiar. I was about to ask the maid about it when my witch senses tingled. Hunter was coming up the walk.
What was he doing here? I whirled and stared at him.
"Is everything all right?" he asked as he reached the door.
"Stuart Afton is in the hospital," I blurted. "He had a stroke this morning."
Hunter's green eyes widened slightly. He glanced at the maid. "I'm sorry to hear that. Can you tell me what hospital he's in? I'd like to send over some flowers."
"YesMemorial. That's the closest." She shook her head. "He runs six miles a day, more on weekends. You've ever met anyone who takes better care of their health than Mr. Afton. A stroke just doesn't make sense."
I didn't need to do a mind meld to know what Hunter was thinking. A stroke made sense if dark magick was I involved.
"Thank you. We're sorry to have bothered you," I said to the maid. Then I grabbed Hunter's arm and pulled him down the porch steps. "What are you doing here?" I demanded.
"The same thing you are, I suppose," he replied. "Trying to get some answers."
I didn't want to think about the conclusions I knew he was jumping to.
"Where's your car?" he asked as we reached the curb.
"I have to go pick it up from the shop," I said.
"Hop in. I'll give you a lift."
I stood on the sidewalk. I wasn't sure if I wanted to get into the car with him, knowing the conversation we were about to have. My stomach felt knotted.
"Morgan, make up your mind. I'm freezing." Hunter walked around the car and slid in behind the steering wheel.
I was freezing, too. I climbed into the car and told him how to get to Unser's.
I didn't know what to think and was lost in my own thoughts while Hunter drove. True, sometimes people did have inexplicable strokes. Maybe he had some congenital defect.
"Someone like Stuart Afton is a very unusual candidate for a stroke," Hunter pointed out, and though it was exactly what I'd been thinking, I felt a flash of irritation. Hunter always had to be right.
"It happens," I said. "All kinds of freak things happen. Look at my life."
Hunter nodded. "Exactly. Your life was straight-on normal until magick kicked in. I could say the same for Afton, except magick has dealt with him far more harshly than it has with you."
"You don't know that this has anything to do with magick," I reminded him tightly. "You're jumping to conclusions."
"Am I?" he asked.
I took a deliberate breath and tried to keep my tone reasonable. "Okay, for the sake of argument, let's say David did have something to do with Afton erasing the debt. Well, Afton did it. David has the shop. So why would David hurt him now? He's grateful to Afton. Hurting him now doesn't make sense."
"Unless David made mistakes, got involved with forces he can't control, lost his power over what was supposed to happen," Hunter said. "The darkness is not predictable. It often has effects beyond the immediate, planned ones."
He sounded so self-righteous that I lost my temper and words shot out of my mouth. "You know what? I think being a Seeker makes you suspicious of everyone. I think you're furious because Cal and Selene escaped, so now you're determined to get someone else. David just happens to be a convenient target."
The brakes squealed as Hunter suddenly swerved and pulled off the road. I barely had time to brace myself before he cut off the engine and turned to face me, his eyes blazing with anger. "You have no idea what you're talking about! Do you think this a game for me, where I cut notches in my belt for every renegade witch I run in? Do you think I get off on going after other witches?"
My own temper caught fire. "You do it, though, don't you? You chose it."
The muscle in his jaw twitched, and one hand clenched the steering wheel, his knuckles white. Then Hunter relaxed suddenly, releasing the tension from his body on a deep breath. He rubbed his hand over his chin, the way he did when he was thinking. The car was filled with the vanishing traces of our anger, our quiet breathing. The air seemed alive and crackling and it occurred to me that when I was with Hunter, I literally felt more alive. Probably because I was so often angry at him. But when I was with him, I didn't have time to be crushed with sorrow over Cal.
"Morgan, it's important to me that you understand that what you accused me ofis not true," Hunter said, his voice low. "That's not what being a Seeker is. If the council even suspected me of acting that way, they'd strip me of my powers in a heartbeat. I don't understand how you could think that of me."
His gentle answer made me ashamed. "Okay," I said. "Maybe I was wrong." I've always been a rotten apologizer. It was one of the things I wanted to work on.
"Maybe?" He shook his head and started the car again. Neither one of us spoke after that until we were almost at Unser's. We drove past the entrance to the Afton Enterprises gravel pit and I saw him turn his head to read the sign. When he faced front again, he was frowning.
We pulled Into Unser's yard. "Is this where you felt that dark energy?" Hunter asked me, his frown deepening. "Right here?"
"Yes," I said, puzzled.
"What day was it?" Hunter asked.
"Last Wednesday," I said, but then I saw Das Boot parked over to the side, and I forgot everything else. My beloved white car had a new hood and new bumper, but the hood was blue.
"Oh my God," I gasped. "My car!" Bob Unser heard Hunter's car and came out of the garage, wiping his hands on a rag. Max, the German shepherd, loped out at his side, grinning amiably. Hunter and I climbed out of his car, and I walked slowly to my Valiant, feeling like I was about to cry.
Bob looked over Das Boot with pride. "Good fit, huh?" he asked. "That hood is perfect. We got lucky."
I was speechless. The two front sides of my car had been hammered out and covered with Bondo body filler to fix the crumpling. The Bondo was sanded and looked like steel-gray dusty spackle all over the front of my car. And the hood was blue. The bumper looked all right, but was unusually shiny and looked out of place. My beautiful, lifesaving car looked like crap.
"Uh. . uh. ." I began, wondering if I was going to hyperventilate. After losing my boyfriend, almost being killed, having my magick disappear on me in a circle, worrying about David Redstone; now, ridiculously, what was finally sending me over the edge was owing my parents almost a thousand dollars so my car could look like crap.
Hunter patted my shoulder. "It's just a car," he offered hesitantly.
I couldn't even respond. My mouth just hung open. Bob gave me a look. "Course, it needs to be painted," he said.
"Painted?" I was amazed at how calm my voice was.
"I didn't want to do that without talking to you," he explained, scratching his head. "We can paint it white, to match the rest of the car, but to tell you the truth, the whole car needs a paint job. See those bits of rust under the door? We should really sand those out, give it a coat of rust protector, then paint the whole body. If we Bondo the other dings, this car could look brand-new." The idea seemed to fill him with enthusiasm.
"How much?" I whispered.
"Another four hundred, five hundred, max," he said.
I gulped and nodded. "Um, does it run okay?"
"Sure. I had to tighten the engine block a bit, knock a few hoses tighter. But this baby's a tank. It was mostly bodywork."
Max panted his agreement.
Silently I handed Bob Unser the check my mother had made out, and he dropped the keys into my hand. "Let me think about the paint job," I said.
"Sure thing. Take care of this car, now." He headed back into the warmth of the garage, and I turned to face Hunter, it was dark now, but I could still see Das Boot's tricolor nose, and it made me incredibly upset.
"I'm sorry about your car," Hunter said. "I'm sure it will be fine."
I closed my eyes and nodded. It was obvious he didn't understand at all.
16. Uncertain
The witch from Boston came today. We spent the morning purifying Selene Belltower's house. But we had no luck getting in her library. In fact, this time I couldn't even find the door.
Then, in the afternoon, I fought with Morgan. I pushed her too hard about David. She's resisting me all the way. And why not, when it seems I'm doing nothing but persecute the people she cares for? Am I trying to make her hate me?
No, it's not that simple. I need her to be able to face the truth, even when it's ugly or sinful. I need her to believe in her own strength, the strength that I see every time I look at her.
I've never met anyone who affects me the way she does. We argued today, and the things she said were so wrong and hurtful I wanted to shake her. But then, later, when she saw what the mechanic had done to that old wreck of a car she drives, she looked so shattered, so utterly forlorn, that it was all I could do not to take her in my arms and kiss away the tears.
Giomanach
In my hideous, piebald car, I drove to a fabric shop to get gold cloth and crimson embroidery thread. I needed them for the protection charm I was going to make for Aunt Eileen and Paula. It would be a little pouch embroidered with the rune Eolh, containing herbs and a crystal.
After that I drove to my mom's realty office. Das Boot no longer made a grinding metallic noise; in fact, the engine sounded perfect. But I was ashamed of how my beloved car looked. I parked at an angle and tried not to look at the nose as I walked to Mom's office.
Widow's Vale Realty was in a small, white-shingled building. Inside, the look was deliberately cozy, with polished hardwood floors, lots of plants, and arts-and-crafts-style rugs and furniture.
"Oh, Morgan, honey. Hi. Did you get your car?" My mom peered out from a desk piled high with three-ring binders, file folders, and loose computer printouts. She looked overworked and overwhelmed. I sighed. I was glad I'd be able to help.
"Yes," I said. "It's fixed. But please don't make me talk about how it looks."
My mom tried unsuccessfully to bite back a smile. A non-car lover, like Hunter. What strange creatures they were.
Thursday and Friday were uneventful days at Widow's Vale High. I met with Cirrus on Friday morning before classes. Everyone was excited about having a circle the following night with Hunter.
"I've been reading this guy, Eliade, who's an expert in the history of religions, and Eliade talks about sacred space," Ethan said. "I'm thinking that's where Hunter took us. And that's exactly what ritual is supposed to do."
I tried not to gape. If anyone had told me two months ago that Ethan Sharp would be discoursing on ritual and sacred space, I'd have told them they were nuts.
"That never happened with Cal," Jenna pointed out. "We did feel magick that one time, but with Hunter it was different. It was just this incredible. . connection."
"That first circle with Hunter changed me," Sharon stated. "I can never go back to thinking about anything the way I did before."
Suddenly I realized they were all feeling something similar to what I'd felt during our very first circle with Cal, when he'd opened me up to magick. It had changed everything. And I ought to be feeling glad instead of resenting the coven and Hunter because my own experience in the circle had been so frustrating.
Matt, whom I'd considered totally self-absorbed, caught me off guard. "But Morgan didn't like it," he said. "It's funny that Hunter has all this power and the one blood witch among us doesn't think he's so great."
Blood witch? I looked up.
"Robbie told us. It sort of came out when he was explaining about Cal," Jenna said gently. "It's okay. We pretty much knew, anyway."
"Uh," I started, flustered. "It's not that I don't like Hunter."
"What is it, then?" Sharon asked.
It was complicated. It was Cal, losing Cal. Hunter being a Seeker and the one who'd made me see the truth about Cal. Hunter suspecting David of dark magick. I shook my head. I couldn't even begin to explain it. So I just shrugged and said, "I don't know, exactly."
Fortunately the first bell rang then. I hurried away, mumbling about how I had to get to my locker. How could I explain my feelings about Hunter to them when I couldn't even explain them to myself?
Saturday dawned cold and bleak. I woke up just after sunriseunusual for meshaken by a dream I couldn't remember. Dagda was curled up against my chest. I kissed the top of his silky head and tried to fall back asleep, but it was useless. My thoughts were already roiling. Hunter's face kept rising in front of my eyes. I wondered how Stuart Afton was doing. I needed to get a start on my physics homework and also get back to the realty office to input listings.
That night I had a circle, and Hunter wanted to get together on Sunday for a lesson. I'd told Aunt Eileen and Paula that I'd help them unpack sometime during the weekend, but what I really needed to do was get the last ingredients for my protection charm so I could place it in their house. That meant I had to go to Practical Magick and face David. Would he be able to sense my uncertainty about him?