Last week, Rayne says, complete adoration displayed on her face. Seconds before Ever added her blood to the antidote and wrecked everything.
Rayne! Romy glances between her sister and me, shaking her head. But I just let it go. This is one battle Ill never win.
I meant before that. Damen squints into the distance, trying to remember the date.
They look at him, a mischievous gleam in their eyes when they say, It was just over six years ago when Ever was ten!
I gape, eyes practically popping out of my head as Damen laughs. Ah, yes. And I have you two to thank for helping me find her. And since you know how much she means to me, Id appreciate your kindness toward her. Thats not too much to askis it? He chucks Rayne under the chin, causing her to smile as her cheeks flush bright pink.
So to what do I owe this incredible honor? He leads us into the still empty living room. Of being reunited with my long lost friends, who, I might add, havent aged a day since we met.
They look at each other and giggle, clearly prepared to be charmed by anything he says. And before I can even think of a reply, find the right words to slowly break him in and get him used to the idea of their living with him, they look at each other and shout, Ever said we could live with you!
Damen glances at me, smile still planted on his face, as a look of pure horror creeps into his eyes.
Temporarily, I add, gaze meeting his, sending a barrage of telepathic red tulips his way. Just until I find a way to get them back to Summerland, or their magick returns, whichever comes first. Tacking on a mental note of: Remember when you said you wanted to improve your karma, to make up for your past? Well, what better way than to help someone in need? And this way you can keep the house, since youll need the extra space. Its the perfect solution. Everyone wins! Nodding and smiling so eagerly Im like a bobble head doll.
Damen glances first at me, then the twins, laughing and shaking his head when he says, Of course you can stay. For as long as you need. So what do you say we all head upstairs so you can pick out your rooms?
I sigh, my perfect boyfriend proving himself even more perfect. Following behind as the twins race up the stairshappy, giggling, completely transformed now that theyre in Damens care.
Can we have this room? They ask, eyes lighting up as they stand in the doorway of Damens special room thats still devoid of his things.
No! I answer too quickly, wincing when they turn, eyes narrowed and glaring at me. But even though I feel bad about the negative start, Im determined to return this room to its normal state, and theres no way I can do that if theyre camping in it. Its taken, I add, knowing it did nothing to soften the blow. But theres plenty more, this place is huge, youll see. Theres even a pool!
Romy and Rayne glance at each other before marching down the hall, heads bobbing together, whispering quietly, not bothering to hide their annoyance with me.
You couldve just given it to them, Damen thinks, close enough to send a charge through my veins.
I shake my head and walk silently alongside him, telepathically replying, I want to see it filled with your things. Even though they no longer mean anything to you, they mean a great deal to me. You cant just toss out the pastcant just turn your back on the things that defined you.
He stops, turning to me as he says, Ever, we are not defined by our things. Its not the clothes that we wear, the cars that we drive, the art we acquireits not where we livebut how we live that defines us. His gaze bores into mine, as he gathers me into a telepathic embrace, the effect seeming so real, it robs me of breath. Its our actions that are remembered long after were gone, he adds, smoothing my hair as his lips telepathically meet mine.
True. I smile, enhancing the image he created with tulips and sunsets and rainbows and cupids and all manner of clichéd romantic themes that make us both laugh. Except that were immortal, I add, determined to sway him to my side. Which means none of that really applies. So with that in mind, maybe we can just
But I dont even get to finish before the twins call for us, shouting, This room! I want this one!
Since the twins are so used to being together, I was sure theyd want to share the same space and even get bunk beds or something. But the moment they checked out the size of the next room, and the one after that, they each staked their claim and never looked back. Spending the next several hours directing Damen and me to decorate down to their most minute specifications, demanding we manifest beds, dressers, and shelves, only to change their minds, have us empty the room, and start all over again.
But as long as Damen was using his magick, I didnt complain. I was far too relieved to see him manifesting again, even if he was still refusing to manifest anything for himself. By the time we finished, the sun was starting to rise, and I knew Id better return home before Sabine woke up and noticed I was gone.
Dont be surprised if I dont make it to school today, he says, walking me to the front door.
I sigh, hating the thought of going without him.
I cant leave them here on their own. Not until they get settled in. He shrugs, hooking his thumb over his shoulder and pointing upstairs where the twins are finally, mercifully, asleep in their beds.
I nod, knowing hes right, and vowing to get them back to Summerland soon, before they get too comfortable here.
Im not sure thats the solution, he says, sensing my thoughts.
I squint, unsure where hes going, but getting an uncomfortable ping in my gut nonetheless.
Ive been thinking He cocks his head to the side, thumb tracing his stubble-lined chin. Theyve been through a lotlosing their home, their families, everything theyve ever known and lovedtheir lives taken so abruptly, they hadnt had a chance to even live them He shakes his head. They deserve a real childhood, you know? A fresh start in the world
I gape, wanting to respond but the words just wont come. Because while I also want them to be happy and safe and all of those things, as far as the rest goes, were no longer on the same page. I was planning for a short little visit, a couple of days, or at the very worstweeks. Never once did I entertain the idea of becoming surrogate parents, especially to twins whore just a few years younger than me.
It was just a thought. He shrugs. Ultimately, the decision is theirs. Its their life.
I swallow hard and avert my gaze, telling myself this is nothing that has to be settled just yet, heading toward my manifested car when Damen says, Ever. Seriously? A Lamborghini?
I cringe, flushing under his gaze. I needed something fast. I shrug, knowing hes not buying it the second I see his face. They were scared of being outside, so I needed to get them here quickly.
And did it need to be shiny and red as well? He laughs, glancing between the car and me and shaking his head.
I press my lips together and look away, refusing to say anything more. I mean, its not like I was planning to keep it. Ill get rid of it the second I get home and pull into my drive.
I open the door and climb in, suddenly remembering the thing I meant to ask him before. Taking in the elegant lines of his face as I say, Hey Damenhowd you open the door so quickly? Howd you know we were here?
He looks at me, eyes meeting mine as the smile slowly fades from his face.
I mean, it was four in the morning. I didnt even have a chance to knock and you were already there. Werent you asleep?
And even though a chunk of flashy red metal stands between us, its as though hes right there, gaze sending shivers over my skin when he says, Ever, I can always sense when youre near.
CHAPTER 14
After a long day at school without Damen, the second the final bell rings, I get in my car and head for his house. But instead of making a left at the light, I pull an illegal U-turn. Telling myself I should allow him some space, give him a chance to bond with the twinswhen the truth is, between their hero worship of Damen and Raynes glaring animosity toward mewell, Im just not ready to face them again.
I head toward downtown Laguna, figuring Ill stop by Mystics and Moonbeams, the metaphysical bookstore where Ava once worked. Thinking maybe Lina, the stores owner, can help me find a solution to my more mystical problems without my divulging just what it is that Im after. Which, considering how suspicious she is, should prove to be quite a feat.
After manifesting the best parking space I can, which in overcrowded Laguna happens to be two blocks away, I stuff the meter full of quarters and make my way toward the door, only to be met by a big red sign reading: BE BACK IN TEN!
I stand before it, lips pressed together as I glance all around, making sure no one is watching as I mentally flip the sign over while making the dead bolt retreat. Silencing the bell on the door as I slip inside and head for the bookshelves, relishing the chance to browse on my own, free of Linas scrutiny.
The tips of my fingers graze the long row of spines, waiting for some kind of signal, a sudden warming, an itch at the tips, something to alert me to just the right one. But not getting anything, I grab one near the end and close my eyes, pressing my palms to the front and back covers, eager to see whats inside.
Howd you get in here?
I jump, bumping into the shelf just behind me, knocking a pile of CDs to the floor.
Cringing at the mess at my feet, scattered jewel cases everywhere, some of them cracked, as I say, You scared meI
I drop to my knees, heart racing, face flushing, wondering not just who he is but how he couldve possibly managed to sneak up on me when it should be impossible to do so. A mortals energy always announces itself long before their actual presence does. So is it possible that heisnt mortal?
I sneak a quick peek as he kneels down beside me, taking in his tanned skin, defined arms, and heavy clump of golden brown dreadlocks spilling over his shoulder and halfway down his back. Watching as he gathers the damaged jewel cases into his hands, searching for some kind of sign thatll out him as an immortal, maybe even a rogue. A face thats too perfectan Ouroboros tattoobut when he catches me looking, he smiles in a way that not only displays the most disarming set of dimples perfectly punctuating each cheek, but a set of teeth that are just crooked enough to prove hes nothing like me.
You okay? he asks, gazing at me with eyes so green I can barely remember my name.
I nod, standing awkwardly and rubbing my palms on my jeans, wondering why Im so breathless, unnerved, forcing the words from my lips when I say, Yeah. Imfine. Inadvertently tacking a nervous laugh onto the end thats so high pitched and foolish I cringe and turn away. I, umI was just, browsing the merchandise, I add, realizing just after Ive said it that I probably have more right to be here than he does.
Glancing over my shoulder to find him gazing at me in a way I cant read, I take a deep breath and pull my shoulders back. I think the real question is, howd you get in here? Taking in his sandy bare feet and wet board shorts hanging dangerously low on his hips, averting my gaze before I can see anything more.
I own the place. He nods, stacking the fallen CDs, the ones that arent cracked, back onto the shelf before turning to me.
Really? I turn, eyes narrowed when I add. Cuz I happen to know the owner, and you dont look a thing like her.
He cocks his head to the side, squinting in faux contemplation and rubbing his chin as he says, Really? Most people claim to see a resemblance. Though, I have to admit, Im with you, never seen it myself.
Youre related to Lina? I gape, hoping my voice didnt sound as panicked to his ears as it did mine.
Shes my grandmother. He nods. Names Jude, by the way.
He offers his hand, long, tanned, fingers extended, waiting for mine. But even though my curiositys piqued, I cant do it. Despite my interest, despite my wondering why he makes me feel soflustered and off balanceI cant risk the barrage of knowledge a single touch brings when my psyches disturbed.
I nod, responding with this stupid, embarrassing sort of half wave, as I mumble my name. Trying not to wince when he gives me an odd look and lowers his hand again.
So, now that thats covered He slings his damp towel over his shoulder, sending a spray of sand through the room. Im back to my original question, what are you doing in here?
I turn, feigning sudden interest in a book on dream interpretation when I say, Im sticking with my original answer, which was browsing, in case youve forgotten. Surely you allow browsers in here? I turn, meeting his gazethose amazing sea green eyes reminding me of an ad for a tropical getaway. Something about them soindefinablestartlingand yetstrangely familiarthough Im sure Ive never seen him before.
He laughs, pushing a tangle of golden dreads off his face and exposing a scar splicing right through his brow, gaze landing just to my right as he says, And yet, after all the summers Ive spent here, watching customers browse the merchandise, Ive never once seen someone browse quite like you.
His lips pull at the sides, as his eyes study mine. Then I turn, cheeks heating, heart racing, taking a moment to compose myself before turning back to say, Youve never seen someone browse the back cover? Thats a little odd, dont you think?
Not with their eyes closed. He tilts his head to the side and focuses on the space to my right once again.
I swallow hard, flustered, shaky, knowing I need to change the subject before I sink any deeper. Maybe you should be more concerned with how I got in here instead of what Im doing in here, I say, wishing I could take it back the second its out.
He looks at me, gaze narrowed. Figured I left the door open again. Are you saying I didnt?
No! I shake my head, hoping he doesnt notice the way my cheeks color and heat. No, thatsthats exactly what Im saying. You did leave the door open, I add, trying not to fidget, blink, press my lips together, or otherwise give myself away. Wide open in fact, which is not only a waste of air-conditioning but totally I stop, my stomach going weird when I see the smile at play on his lips.
So, a friend of Linas, huh? He moves toward the register, dropping his towel on the counter in a wet, sandy thud. Never heard her mention you before.
Well, we werent exactly friends. I shrug, hoping it didnt look as awkward as it felt. I mean, I met her once and she helped me withwait, why did you just phrase it like that? You know, all past tense. Is Lina okay?
He nods, perching on a stool, grabbing a purple cardboard box from a drawer and flipping through a bunch of receipts. Shes on one of her annual retreats. Picks a different one each year. This time its Mexico. Trying to determine if the Mayans were right and the world will end in 2012. Whats your take?
He looks at me, green eyes curious, insistent, boring right into mine. But I just scratch my arm and shrug, never having heard that particular theory before and wondering if it applies to Damen and me. Is that when well head for the Shadowland, or will we be forced to wander a barren Earththe last two survivors responsible for repopulating the landonlyirony alertif we touch, Damen dies
I shake my head, eager to escape that particular thread before it can really take hold and mess with my head. Besides, Im here for a reason and I need to stick with the plan.
So how do you know her? If you werent exactly friends.
I met her through Ava, I say, hating the feel of her name on my lips.
He rolls his eyes, mumbling something unintelligible and shaking his head.
So you know her? I look at him, allowing my gaze to travel his face, his neck, his shoulders, his smooth tanned chest, making my way down to his navel, before forcing myself to look away again.
Yeah, I know her. He pushes the box aside, gaze meeting mine. Just up and disappeared the other dayinto thin air from what I can tell
Oh, you dont know the half of it, I think, carefully watching his face.
called her house, her cell, but nothing. Finally did a drive-by to make sure she was okay and the lights were on so its clear shes been dodging me. He shakes his head. Left me with a bunch of angry clients, demanding a reading. Who wouldve thought shed turn out to be such a flake?
Yes, who wouldve thought? Certainly not the person who was foolish enough to place her deepest darkest secrets right into her greedy, outstretched, hands . . .
Still havent found anyone good enough to replace her though. And let me tell ya, its pretty much impossible to give readings and take care of the store. Thats why I stepped out just now. He shrugs. Surf was calling and I needed a break. Guess I left the door open again.
His eyes meet mine, sparkling and deep. And I cant tell if he truly believes he left the door open, or if he suspects me. But when I try to peer into his head to see for myself Im stopped by the wall hes erected to safeguard his thoughts from people like me. All I have to go by is the brilliant purple aura I failed to see beforeits color waving and shimmering, beckoning to me.
So far all I got are a stack of applications from amateurs. But Im so desperate to get my weekends back, Im ready to toss their names in a bowl and pick one just to get it over with. He shakes his head and flashes those dimples again.
And even though part of me cant believe what Im about to do, the other part, the more practical part, urges me on, recognizing the perfect opportunity when its standing before me.
Maybe I can help. I hold my breath as I wait for his reply. But when my only response is a set of narrowed lids accompanied by the slightest curling of lips, I add, Seriously. You dont even have to pay me!
He squints even further, those amazing green eyes practically disappearing from sight.
What I meant was you dont have to pay me all that much, I say, not wanting to come off as some weird desperate freak who gives it away for free. Ill work for just over minimum wagebut only because Im so good Ill be living off the tips.
Youre psychic? He folds his arms and tilts his head back, gazing at me with complete disbelief.
I straighten my posture and try not to fidget. Hoping to appear professional, mature, someone he can trust to help run his store. Yup. I nod, unable to keep from wincing, unused to confiding my abilities to anyone, much less a stranger. I just sort of know thingsinformation just sort of comes to meits hard to explain.
He looks at me, wavering, then focusing just to my right as he says, So what exactly are you then?
I shrug, fingers playing with the zipper on my hoodie, drawing it up and down, down and up, having no idea what he means.
Are you clairaudient, clairvoyant, clairsentient, clairgustance, clairscent, or clairtangency? Which is it? He shrugs.
All of the above. I nod, having no idea what half those things mean, but figuring if its got anything even remotely to do with psychic abilities, then I can probably do it.
But youre not mediumistic, he says, as though its a fact.
I can see spirits. I shrug. But only the ones that are still here, not the ones whove crossed I stop, pretending to clear my throat, knowing its better not to mention the bridge, Summerland, or any of that. I cant see the ones whove crossed over. I shrug, hoping he doesnt try to push it since thats as far as Ill go.
He squints, gaze roaming from the top of my pale blond head and all the way down to my Nike clad feet. A gaze that makes my whole body quiver. Reaching for a long-sleeved tee stashed under the counter and yanking it over his head before he looks at me and says, Well, Ever, if you wanna work here, youre gonna have to pass the audition.
CHAPTER 15
Jude locks the front door then leads me down a short hall and into a small room on the right. I follow behind, hands flexed by my sides, staring at the peace sign on the back of his tee and reminding myself that if he does anything creepy I can take him down quickly and make him regret the day he ever went after me.
He motions toward a padded foldable chair facing a small square table covered by shiny blue cloth, taking the seat just opposite me and propping his bare foot on his knee as he says, So, whats your specialty?
I gaze at him, hands folded, focusing on taking slow deep breaths while trying not to squirm.
Tarot cards? Runes? I Ching? Psychometry? Which is it?
I glance at the door, knowing I could reach it in a fraction of a second, which might cause a stir, but so what?
You are going to give me a reading, right? His gaze levels on mine. You do realize thats what I meant by audition? He laughs, displaying a matching set of dimples as he swings his dreads over his shoulder and laughs some more.
I stare at the tablecloth, tracing the bumpy raw silk with my fingers, heat rising to my cheeks when I remember Damens last words, how he can always sense me, and hoping he was just saying thatthat he cant sense me now.
I dont need anything, I mumble, still unwilling to meet his gaze. All I need is a quick touch of your hand and Im good to go.
Palmistry. He nods. Not what I wouldve expected, but okay. He leans toward me, hands open, palms up, ready to go.
I swallow hard, seeing the deeply etched lines, but thats not where the story livesat least not for me. I dont actually read em, I say, voice betraying my nervousness, as I work up the courage to touch him. Its more thethe energyI justtune into it. Thats where all the info is.
He pulls back, studying me so closely I cant meet his eyes. Knowing I need to just touch him, get it over with. And I need to do it now.
Is it just the hand, or? He flexes his fingers, the calluses lining his palms rising and falling again.
I clear my throat, wondering why Im so nervous, why I feel like Im betraying Damen, when all Im trying to do is land a job thatll make my aunt happy. No, it can be anywhere. Your ear, your nose, even your big toedoesnt matter, it all reads the same. The hands just more accessible, you know?
More accessible than the big toe? He smiles, those sea green eyes seeking mine.
I take a deep breath, thinking how coarse and rough his hands appear, especially compared to Damens whose are almost softer than mine. And somehow, even just the thought of that makes this whole moment feel off. Now that our touch is forbidden, just being alone with another guy feels sordid, illicit, wrong.
I reach toward him, eyes shut tight, reminding myself its just a job interviewthat theres really no reason I cant land this thing quickly and painlessly. Pressing my finger to the center of his palm and feeling the soft, gentle give of his flesh. Allowing his stream of energy to flow through meso peaceful, serene, its like wading into the calmest of seas. So different from the rush of tingle and heat Ive grown used to with Damenat least until the shock of Judes life story unfolds.
I yank my hand back as though Ive been stung, fumbling for the amulet just under my top, noting the alarm on his face as I rush to explain. Im sorry. I shake my head, angry with myself for overreacting. Normally I wouldnt do that. Normally Im way more discreet. I was just a littlesurprisedthats all. I didnt expect to see anything quite so I stop, knowing my inane babbling is only making it worse. Normally, when I give readings, I hide my reactions much better than that. I nod, forcing my gaze to meet his, knowing whatever I say wont hide the fact that I choked like the worst kind of amateur. Seriously. I smile, lips stretching in a way that cant be convincing. Im like the ultimate poker face. Peering at him again and seeing this isnt quite working. A poker face that is also full of empathy and compassion, I stammer, unable to stop this runaway train. I mean, reallyIm justfull of it I cringe, shaking my head as I gather my things so I can call it a day. Theres no way hell hire me now.
He slides to the edge of his seat, leaning so close I struggle to breathe. So tell me, he says, gaze like a hand on my wrist, holding me in place. What exactly did you see?
I swallow hard, closing my eyes for a moment and replaying the movie I just saw in my head. The images so clear, dancing before me, as I say, Youre different. I peer at him, his body unmoving, gaze steady, allowing no clues as to whether or not Im on track.
But then, youve always been different. Ever since you were little youve seen them. I swallow hard and avert my gaze, the image of him in his crib, smiling and waving at the grandmother who passed years before his birth now etched on my brain. And when I pause, not wanting to say it, but knowing that if I want the job, then Id better get to it. But when your fathershot himselfback when you were tenyou thought you were to blame. Convinced your insistence on seeing your mother, who, by the way passed just one year before, somehow sent him over the edge. It was years before you accepted the truth, that your father was just lonely, depressed, and anxious to be with your mother again. Even so, sometimes you still doubt it.
I gaze at him, noting how he hasnt so much as flinched, though something in those deep green eyes hints at the truth.
He tried to visit a few times. Wanting to apologize for what he did, but even though you sensed him, you blocked it. Sick of being teased by your classmates and scolded by the nunsnot to mention your foster dad who I shake my head, not wanting to continue, but knowing I must. You just wanted to be normal. I shrug. Treated like everyone else. I trace my fingers over the tablecloth, throat beginning to tighten, knowing exactly how it feels to long to fit in, all the while knowing you never truly can. But after you ran away and met Lina, who, by the way, is not your real grandmotheryour real grandparents are dead. I look at him again, wondering if hes surprised that I knew that but he gives nothing away. Anyway, she took you in, fed you, clothed you, she
She saved my life. He sighs, leaning back in his seat, long tanned fingers rubbing at his eyes. In more ways than one. I was so lost and she
Accepted you for who you really are. I nod, seeing the whole story before me, as though Im right there.
And whos that? he asks, hands splayed on his knees, gazing at me. Who am I really?
I look at him, not even pausing when I say, A guy so smart you finished high school in tenth grade. A guy with such amazing mediumistic abilities youve helped hundreds of people and asked very little in exchange. And yet, despite all of that, youre also a guy whos so I look at him, lips lifting at the corners. Well I was going to say lazybut since I really do want this job Ill say laid-back instead. I laugh, relieved when he laughs along with me. And given the choice youd never work another day. Youd spend the rest of eternity just searching for that one perfect wave.
Is that a metaphor? he asks, a crooked smile on his face.
Not in your case. I shrug. In your case, its a fact.
He nods, leaning back in his chair, gazing at me in a way that makes my stomach dance. Dropping forward again, feet flat on the floor when he says, Guilty. Eyes wistful, searching mine. And now, since there are no secrets left, since youve peered right into the core of my soulI have to ask, any insights into my futurea certain blonde perhaps?
I shift in my seat, preparing to speak when he cuts me right off.
And Im talking the immediate future, as in this Friday night. Will Stacia ever agree to go out with me?
Stacia? My voice cracks as my eyes practically pop out of my head. So much for the poker face I was bragging about.
Watching as he closes his eyes and shakes his head, those long, golden dreadlocks contrasting so nicely with his gorgeous dark skin. Anastasia Pappas, aka Stacia, he says, unaware of my sigh of relief, thrilled to know its some other horrible Stacia and not the one I know.
Tuning in to the energy surrounding her name and knowing right away that its never gonna happenat least not in the way that he thinks. You really want to know? I ask, knowing I could save him a lot of wasted effort by telling him now, but doubting he really wants to hear the truth as much as he claims. I mean, wouldnt you rather just wait and see how it plays? I look at him, hoping hell agree.
Is that what youre going to say to your clients? he asks, back to business again.