A Warrior lunged at Rephaim and at the very last moment he parried the blow. Sick and scared and almost completely defeated by the terrible unknown of what was going to happen to both of them, it took Stevie Rae longer than it should have for her to really see what Rephaim was doingor rather, not doing. And when she did see it, Stevie Rae felt the sweet stirring of hope.
Zoey, she clutched her friends hand, unwilling to look away from the battle. Watch Rephaim. Hes not attacking. Hes not hurting anyone. Hes only defending himself.
Zoey paused, observing, and then said, Youre right. Stevie Rae, youre right! Hes not attacking.
Pride for Rephaim made Stevie Raes chest hurt, like her heart was thudding too hard to be held inside her rib cage. The Warriors kept attacking, brutal and deadly in their intent. Kalona kept wounding, maiming, and even killing. Rephaim continued to only defend himselfhe blocked blows, he feinted and lunged, but he harmed none of the Warriors who were so obviously trying to kill him.
Shes correct, Darius said. The Raven Mocker is entirely on the defensive.
Press them! Kill them! Neferet shouted. Stevie Rae took her gaze from Rephaim long enough to glance at her. Neferet looked bloated with power, reveling in the violence and destruction that was happening before her. Why didnt anyone else see the horrible Darkness that pulsed and slithered in excitement around her, wrapping around her legs, caressing her body, feeding from her power as, in turn, Neferet fed from the death and destruction around her?
With an avenging Dragon Lankford leading them, the Sons of Erebus Warriors redoubled their attack.
I have to stop it, Stevie Rae spoke more to herself than aloud. Before its gone too far and he cant help but kill somebody, I have to stop it.
Theres no stopping it, Zoey said quietly. I think Neferet planned something like this all along. Kalonas probably here because she told him to be.
Kalona may be, but Rephaim isnt, Stevie Rae said firmly. He came here to be sure Im okay, and Im not gonna let him go down because of that.
Still watching the bloody battle, Stevie Rae imagined she was a treea giant, strong oak, and her legs were roots going way, way down deep into the earth. So deep that Neferets sticky threads of Darkness couldnt reach her. And then she imagined pulling power from the spirit of the earthrich and fertile and mighty. The pure essence of the earth surged up into her body. Stevie Rae stood. She waved away Zs hand, and when she did Stevie Rae caught sight of her own hand. It was glowing with a soft, familiar green. She started walking forward, toward Rephaim.
Whoa, where do you think youre going? Stark asked. Beside him, Darius looked solid and very much in her way.
To dance with beasts, so Im gonna penetrate their disguise. The quote from Kramishas poem drifted through her mind, dream-like.
Okay, crazy much? Aphrodite said. You need to stay your butt here and out of that mess over there.
Stevie Rae ignored Aphrodite and faced down the two Warriors. Im Imprinted with him. My decisions made. If you gotta fight mefight me, but Im goin over there to Rephaim.
No ones fighting you, Stevie Rae, Zoey said. Let her go, she told Stark and Darius.
I need your help, Stevie Rae told Zoey. If youll trust me, come with me and give me a boost with spirit.
No! You cant get mixed up in that, Stark told Zoey.
Zoey smiled at him. But weve already mixed it up with Kalona and we won, remember?
Stark snorted. Yeah, after I died.
Dont worry, Guardian. Ill save you again if I need to. Zoey turned back to Stevie Rae. You said Rephaim saved your life?
Twice, and he had to stand up to Darkness to do it. Rephaim has good inside him. You got my promise on that, Z. Please, please trust me.
I trust you. Ill always trust you, Zoey said. Im going with Stevie Rae, she told Stark, who didnt look happy at all about that news.
Im going too, Damien said, dry-eyed. If you need air, itll be there for you. I still believe in love.
I dont like the birdthing, but airs not going without fire, Shaunee said.
Ditto, Twin, Erin said.
Stevie Rae met each of their gazes. Thank yall. This means more than I can ever tell ya.
Oh, for shits sake. Lets go save the unattractive birdboy so the bumpkin can live unhappily ever after, Aphrodite said.
Yeah, lets do that, only take both uns outta that sentence, Stevie Rae said, and with the circle forming around her, flanked by Stark and Darius, Stevie Rae led them forward. Still channeling the earth, she didnt hesitate, but strode over to the scene of blood and destruction, getting as close to Rephaim as she could.
No! he yelled, catching a glimpse of her. Stay back!
Like heck I will! Stevie Rae looked at Damien. Time to cowboy up. Call air.
Damien faced east. Air, I need you. Come to me! Wind whirled around him, lifting his and everyone elses hair.
Stevie Rae raised her brows at Shaunee, who rolled her eyes, but faced south and called, Fire, come burn for me, baby! While heat joined air, and without any prompting, Erin faced west and said, Water, come on and join the circle! The scent of spring showers touched their faces.
As quickly as water joined them, Stevie Rae looked northward and said, Earth, youre already with me. Please join the circle, too. The root-like connection to the ground that she already had intensified, and Stevie Rae knew she was like a lighthouse shining bright mossy green.
From beside her, Z said, Spirit, please complete our circle.
There was a wonderful sense of well-being that Stevie Rae held onto as she stepped out from her group, as if she was their spearhead. Fully empowered by her element, she raised her arms, channeled the timeless, wise strength of trees, said, Earth, make a barrier to end this fightin. Please. She pointed at the men.
Help her, air, Damien said.
Fire her up, fire, Shaunee added.
Support her, water, Erin said.
Fill her, spirit, Zoey said.
Stevie Rae felt a shot of adrenaline rush from the circle of earth around her, up through her feet, and into her hand. Vine-like, green tendrils shot from the ground, making a caged barrier all around Rephaim and Kalona, completely halting the fighting.
They all turned to look at her.
There, thats better. Now we can figure this out, Stevie Rae said.
So, Zoey and your circleyouve decided to ally with Darkness, too, Neferet said.
Before Z could respond Stevie Rae said, Neferet, thats as nutty as squirrel turds. Z just got back from hangin out with Nyx in the Otherworld. She managed to kick Kalonas ass there, and bring her Warrior back safe and sound with hersomethin no other High Priestess has ever been able to do. Shes not exactly Darkness material. Neferet opened her mouth to speak and Stevie Rae cut her off. No! I only have one more thing to say to youno matter who you fool, I want you to know Ill never believe youve changed. Youre a liar, and youre really, really not nice. I have seen the white bull, and I know the Darkness youre playin with; I know just how wacked you are. Heck, Neferet, I can see that stuff slithering round you right now. So. Back. The. Hell. Off.
She turned her back to Neferet and focused on Kalona. She opened her mouth and suddenly her words dried up. The winged immortal looked like an avenging god. His bare chest was spattered with blood and his black spear dripped gore. His eyes shined amber as they stared at her with an expression that was amusement mixed with disdain.
How did I ever think I could stand up to him? Stevie Raes mind shouted inside her head. Hes too powerful, and Im nothingjust nothing
Strengthen her, spirit, Zoeys voice whispered to her, carried on the wind Damien had conjured.
Stevie Rae pulled her gaze from Kalonas, meeting Zoeys eyes. Her BFF smiled. Go on. Finish what you started. You can do it.
Stevie Rae felt a rush of gratitude. As her gaze returned to Kalona, she pulled deeply from the roots she imagined connecting her to her element and with that lifeline of power, and the support of her friends, she finished what shed started.
Okay, everybody knows that you used to be Nyxs Warrior, but that youre here cause somethin messed up with that, she said matter-of-factly, which means you messed up. It also means that even though youve gone all evil and stuff, you used to know about honor and loyalty and maybe even love. So I have somethin to tell you about your son, and I want you to listen to me. I dont know how or why it happened, but I love him, and I think he loves me. Here she paused and met Rephaims gaze.
I do, he said clearly and distinctly so that his voice carried to everyone watching. I love you, Stevie Rae.
She took one moment to smile at him, full on, filled with pride, and happiness, and above all, love. Then she refocused on Kalona. Yes, its weird. No, its never gonna be a normal relationship, and Goddess knows were gonna have to deal with lots of issues with my friends, but heres whats most important: I can give Rephaim kindness and a life where hell know peace and happiness. But I cant do that unless you do somethin first. You have to free him, Kalona. You have to let him make his own choice between staying with you or changing his path. Im gonna go out on a limb here and believe with everything inside me, that somewhere deep inside you is still a tiny sliver of Nyxs Warrior, and that Kalona, the one who protected our Goddess, would do the right thing. Please be that Kalona again, if only just for one second.
Into the long silence where Kalona stared unblinkingly at Stevie Rae, Neferets voice intrudeddisdainful and arrogant. Enough of this silly charade. Ill take care of the grass barrier. Dragon, exact your revenge on the Raven Mocker. And you, Kalona, you I order to be banished from my side as you were before. Nothing has changed between us. As she spoke, Stevie Rae watched her pull from the shadows all around them, and from her own body, the slithering black tentacles that seemed to always be near her now.
Stevie Rae readied herself. It was going to be awful, but she was dang sure not backing down, and that meant she was gonna have to stand up to Darkness again.
But just as she felt the first tug of pain and chill, and the drain Darkness caused within the earth, the winged immortal raised one hand slightly, and said, Halt! Ive long allied with Darkness. Obey my command. This is not your battle. Begone!
No! Neferet shrieked as the sticky threads, invisible to almost everyone present, began to slither away to be reabsorbed into the shadows from whence they came. Neferet turned on Kalona. Foolish creature! What are you doing? I ordered you to leave. You must obey my command! I am High Priestess here!
I am not under your control! Nor have I ever been. Kalonas smile was victorious and he looked so magnificent for a moment Stevie Raes breath caught at the sight of him.
I dont know what youre talking about, Neferet recovered quickly. It is I who was under your control.
Kalona glanced around the school grounds, taking in the wide-eyed fledglings and the vampyres who were either armed against him or frozen somewhere between their desire to run from him and their desire to adore him. Ah, children of Nyx, like me, many of you have stopped listening to your Goddess. When will you learn?
Then the winged immortal looked to his right. Rephaim was standing there, silently watching his father.
It is true you have Imprinted with the Red One?
Yes, Father. It is.
And you saved her life? More than once?
As she has saved mine in turn, more than once. It was she who truly healed me from the fall. It was she who filled the terrible wound Darkness ripped within me later, after I faced the white bull for her. Rephaims eyes found Stevie Raes. As payment for freeing her from Darkness, she touched me with the power of Light she wields, that of the earth.
I didnt do that as payment. I did that because I couldnt stand to see you hurtin, said Stevie Rae.
Slowly, as if it were difficult for him, Kalona lifted his hand and rested it on his sons shoulder. You know she can never love you as a woman loves a man? You will forever desire something she cannot, will not, give you.
Father, what she gives me is more than I have ever known before.
Stevie Rae saw pain twist Kalonas face, if only for an instant. I have given you love as my son, my favorite son, he said so softly she had to strain to hear him.
Rephaim hesitated and when he answered his father, Stevie Rae could hear the raw honesty in his voice, and the heartache the admission cost him. Perhaps in another world, another life, that might have been true. In this one you gave me power and discipline and anger, but you did not give me love. Never love.
Kalonas eyes flashed, but Stevie Rae thought she saw more pain than anger within their amber depths. Then in this world, in this life, I shall give you one more thing: choice. Choose, Rephaim. Choose between the father you have served and followed faithfully for eons and the power that service has afforded you, and the love of this vampyre High Priestess, who will never be completely yours because she will always, always be horrified by the monster within you.
Rephaims eyes found hers. She saw the question in them and answered it before he could ask it aloud.
I dont see a monster when I look at younot outside, not inside. So Im not horrified by you. I love you, Rephaim.
Rephaim closed his eyes for a moment, and she felt a quiver of unease. He was goodStevie Rae believed that, but to choose her over his father would change the course of his life forever. He was part immortal, and forever could be a literal thing for him. Maybe he couldntmaybe he wouldntmaybe he
Father Stevie Rae opened her eyes the second she heard Rephaims voice. He was speaking to Kalona, but he was still looking at her. I choose Stevie Rae, and the path of the Goddess.
Her gaze darted to Kalona in time to see the grimace of pain pass over his face. Then so be it. From this day forth you are no longer my son. He paused and Rephaim turned his gaze from her to the winged immortal. I would offer you Nyxs blessing, but she no longer hears me. So instead I offer you a piece of advice: if you love her with everything within you, when you realize she does not love you in the same wayand she will not, cannotit will kill everything within you. Kalona unfurled his great wings, lifted both arms, and proclaimed, Rephaim is free of me! So I have spoken. So let it be!
Afterward, Stevie Rae would think about that moment and the way the air quivered around Rephaim with his immortal fathers release. Then all she could do was to stare wide-eyed at Rephaim as the red tint that had been present in his eyes for as long as she had been looking into them faded, leaving only the wide, dark eyes of a human boy staring at her from the head of an enormous raven.
Wings still extended, body still magnified by power and, Stevie Rae liked to believe, by the grief he had to feel somewhere inside him at the loss of his son, Kalona moved his amber gaze to Neferet. He didnt say one word. He only laughed and then launched himself into the night sky, leaving a trail of mocking laughter behind him and one other thing. From the air a single white feather dropped to the ground at Stevie Raes feet. It shocked her so much that the barrier shed erected around Rephaim dissipated, but she was staring at the feather so intently that Stevie Rae didnt even realize her concentration had utterly shattered. She was bending to pick up the feather when Neferet commanded Dragon.
Now that the immortal has fled, kill his son. I am not fooled by this charade.
Stevie Rae felt the terribly familiar sting of Darkness breaking her connection to the earth, weakening her. She was unable to even cry out as she watched Dragon descend on Rephaim.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Rephaim
Rephaim hadnt even had time to take in what had happened when Neferet ordered his death. He was watching Stevie Rae in wonder as she stared down at something white in the grass. Then chaos ensued. The green glow that had been surrounding him faded. Stevie Rae turned ghostly pale and swayed dizzily. The Raven Mocker was so focused on Stevie Rae that he didnt even know Dragon was attacking, and then her friend Zoey was suddenly there before him, placing herself between him and the avenging Sons of Erebus.
No. We dont attack people who choose the path of the Goddess. She spoke in an amplified voice, and the Warriors halted uncertainly in front of her. Rephaim noted that Stark had moved to stand on one side of her, and Darius on the other. Both Warriors had their swords raised, but their expressions spoke volumes; it was obvious neither of them wanted to strike their brothers.
My fault. It is my fault they stand against each other. Rephaims thoughts were jumbled with self-loathing and uncertainty as he hurried to Stevie Rae.
Will you have Warrior turn against Warrior? Neferet asked Zoey incredulously.
Will you have our Warriors kill someone in the service of their Goddess? countered Zoey.
So now you are able to judge what is in anothers heart? Neferet said, sounding smug and wise. Not even real High Priestesses claim such a divine ability.
Rephaim felt the change in the air before she materialized. It was as if a thunderstorm had been contained and its lightning had charged the air around them. In the middle of the surge of power and light and sound, the Great Goddess of Night, Nyx, appeared.
No, Neferet, Zoey cannot claim such a divine ability, but I can.
Every tentacle of Darkness that had been searching and draining and lurking slithered away at the sound of her divine voice. Beside him, Stevie Rae gasped, like shed let loose the breath shed been holding, and dropped to her knees.
From all around him Rephaim heard awestruck whispers of Its Nyx! Its the Goddess! Oh, blessed be!
And then his attention was consumed by Nyx.
She was, indeed, night personified. Her hair was like the full hunters moon, shining with a silver luminescence. Her eyes were the new moon skyblack and limitless. The rest of her body was almost completely transparent. Rephaim thought he caught a glimpse of dark silk lifting in a breeze of its own, and a womans curvesand perhaps even a crescent moon tattooed on her smooth forehead, but the more he tried to focus on the Goddesss image, the more transparent and incandescent she became. It was then that he noticed he was the only one still standing. Everyone else had knelt to the Goddess, and he, too, knelt.
He quickly realized that he didnt need to worry about his late response. Nyxs attention was elsewhere. She was floating over to Damien, who, ironically, had no idea she approached because he was kneeling with his head bowed and his eyes closed.
Damien, my son, look at me.
Damiens head lifted, and his eyes opened wide in surprise. Oh, Nyx! Its really you! I thought Id imagined you here.
Perhaps in a way, you did. I want you to know that your Jack is with me, and he is one of the purest, most joy-filled spirits my realm has ever known.
Tears filled and overflowed Damiens eyes. Thank you. Thank you for telling me that. It will help me try to get over him.
My son, there is no need to get over Jack. Remember him, and rejoice in the brief, beautiful love you shared. Choosing to do so does not mean forgetting or getting over, it means healing.
Damien smiled through his tears. Ill remember. Ill always remember and choose your path, Nyx. I give you my word.
The Goddesss hovering form turned so that her dark gaze took in the rest of them. Rephaim saw Nyx look fondly at Zoey, who grinned.
Merry meet, my Goddess, Zoey said, shocking Rephaim with the familiar tone of her voice.
Shouldnt she be more respectfulmore fearfulwhen addressing the Goddess?
Merry meet, Zoey Redbird! The Goddess returned the fledgling High Priestesss grin, and he thought, for a moment, she looked like an exquisitely lovely little girla little girl who was suddenly familiar to him. With a jolt Rephaim recognized her. The ghost! The ghost had been the Goddess!
Then Nyx began speaking, addressing the entire gathering, and her visage shifted to an ethereal being so brilliant and beautiful it was difficult to gaze upon her and impossible to think about anything except the words that she spoke like a symphony over them all. Much has happened here this night. Spirit-altering choices were made, which means, for some of you, new life paths have opened. For others, your paths have been sealed, your choices made long ago. And yet others of you are at a life precipice. The Goddesss gaze lingered on Neferet, who instantly bowed her head. You have changed, daughter. You are not as you once were. Truly, can I still call you daughter?
Nyx! Great Goddess! How could I not be your daughter?
Neferet did not raise her head as she spoke to the Goddess, and her thick fall of auburn hair completely covered her face, blanketing her expression.
Tonight you asked for forgiveness. Zoey gave one answer. I shall give you another. Forgiveness is a very special gift, and it must be earned.
I ask humbly that you share that special gift with me, Nyx, Neferet said, still bowing her head and hiding her face.
When you earn the gift, you will receive it. Abruptly, the Goddess turned from Neferet, her attention turning to the Sword Master, who closed his fist over his heart respectfully to her. Your Anastasia is free of pain and remorse. Will you make Damiens choice, and learn to rejoice in the love you had and move on, or will your choice destroy that which she loved so much about youyour ability to be both strong and merciful? Rephaim was watching Dragon, waiting for a response from the Sword Master that did not come, when Nyx spoke his name.
Rephaim.
He looked Nyx full in the face for only an instant, and then Rephaim remembered what he was and he bowed his head in shame and spoke the first words that flooded his mind. Please dont look at me!
He felt Stevie Raes hand slide into his. Dont worry. Shes not here to punish you.
And how do you know that, young High Priestess?
Stevie Raes grip tightened spasmodically on his hand, but her voice didnt falter. Cause you can see into his heart, and I know what youll find there.
What do you believe is in the Raven Mockers heart, Stevie Rae?
Goodness. And I dont think hes a Raven Mocker anymore. His daddy released him. So now I think hes a-a new kinda, uh, boy-whos-never-been-before. She tripped over the words, but managed to finish.
I see you are bound to him, was the Goddesss enigmatic response.
I am, she said firmly.
Even if your bond means splitting this House of Night, and perhaps, this world, in two?
My mama used to prune her roses real fierce, and I thought she was gonna hurt them, maybe kill them. When I asked her about it she told me sometimes you have to cut away the old stuff to make room for the new. Maybe its time to cut away some old stuff, Stevie Rae said.
Her words surprised him so much that Rephaim turned his eyes from the ground to Stevie Rae. She smiled at him and at that moment, he wished more than anything else, he could smile back at her and take her in his arms like a real boy would be able to do, because what he saw in her eyes was warmth and love and happiness with not even the slightest glimpse of remorse or rejection.
Stevie Rae gave him the strength to look up at the Goddess and meet her infinite gaze.
And what he saw there was familiar because mirrored in Nyxs eyes was the same warmth and love and happiness hed seen within Stevie Raes gaze.
Rephaim dropped Stevie Raes hand so that he could close his fist over his heart, in the ancient, respectful greeting. Merry meet, Goddess Nyx.
Merry meet, Rephaim, she said. You are the only child of Kalonas to turn from the rage and pain of your conception, and the hatred that has filled your long life, and seek Light.
None of the others had Stevie Rae, he said.
It is true that she influenced your choice, but you had to be open to her and respond with Light instead of Darkness.
That hasnt always been my choice. In the past Ive done terrible things. These Warriors are right to want me dead, Rephaim said.
Do you regret your past?
I do.
Do you choose a new future where you pledge yourself to my path?
I do.
Rephaim, son of the fallen immortal Warrior Kalona, I accept you into my service, and I forgive you for the mistakes of your past.
Thank you, Nyx. Rephaims voice was rough with emotion as he spoke to the Goddess, his Goddess.
Will you thank me when I tell you that though I forgive you and accept you, there are consequences you must pay for the choices of your past?
No matter what comes next, for an eternity I will thank you. This I swear, he said with no hesitation.
Let us hope that you will have many, many years to live up to your oath. Know then that this is your consequence. Nyx raised her arms as if she could cup the moon in the palms of her hands. It seemed to Rephaim she was gathering light from the stars themselves. Because you have awakened the humanity within you, I will, each night from setting sun to rising sun, gift you with this: the true form you deserve. The Goddess hurled the glowing power that had coalesced between her hands at him. It shuddered through his body, causing a pain so terrible that he screamed in agony and crumpled to the ground. As he lay there, paralyzed, the Goddesss voice was the only sound that broke through to him. To atone for your past, by day you will lose your true form and return to that of the raven, who knows nothing except the base desires of a beast. Consider well how you use your humanity. Learn from the past and balance the beast. So I have spokenso mote it be!
The pain was beginning to recede and Rephaim was able to look up at the Goddess again as she opened her arms to take in everyone and said joyously, I leave the rest of you with my love, if you so choose to accept it, and my desire that you will always blessed be.
Nyx disappeared in what looked like an explosion of the moon. The brightness of it was blinding, which didnt help Rephaims lingering confusion. His body felt strange, unfamiliar, dizzy Rephaim looked down at himself. His shock was so intense he could not, for a moment, comprehend what he saw. Why am I inside a boy? passed through his jumbled mind. It was Stevie Raes sobs that finally got through to him. He was able to focus on her and when he did, Rephaim realized she was crying and laughing at the same time.
What has happened? he asked, still not fully understanding.
Stevie Rae didnt seem to be able to speak because she just kept crying what looked like happy tears.
A hand came into his line of vision and he looked up to see the fledgling High Priestess, Zoey Redbird, smiling wryly at him. Rephaim took her offered hand and stood a little shakily.
Whats happened is our Goddess has zapped you into being a guy, Zoey said.
The truth hit him then and it almost drove him to his knees again. Im human. Completely human. Rephaim stared down at the strong, tall body of a young Cherokee warrior.
Yeah, you are, but only during the nighttime, Zoey was saying. During the day youre gonna be completely a raven.
Rephaim barely heard her. He was already turning to Stevie Rae.
He must have been knocked away from her when Nyx changed him, because she was no longer by his side. She took one small, hesitant step toward him and then stopped, looking unsure and wiping her face.
Is itis it bad? Do I look wrong? he blurted.
No, she said, staring into his eyes. Youre perfect. Absolutely perfect. Youre the boy we saw in the fountain.
Will you can I His voice trailed off. Rephaim was too filled with emotion to find the right words, so he moved instead, closing the space between Stevie Rae and him in two long, strong, totally human strides. With no hesitation he took her in his arms, and then he did what he had barely even allowed himself to do in his dreams. Rephaim bent and kissed Stevie Raes soft lips with his own. He tasted her tears and her laughter, and finally he knew what it was to be truly, completely happy.
So it was reluctantly that he pulled back and told her, Wait. Theres something I have to do.
Dragon Lankford was easy to find. Though everyone was staring at him and Stevie Rae, Rephaim felt the Sword Masters gaze distinctly. He approached Dragon slowly, making no sudden movements. Even so, the Warriors that stood to either side of him shifted, obviously ready to fight by their Sword Masters side once more.