After a very long time that was probably no more than an hour after I woke up, the door opened, and the queen walked in with two female attendants, and two male.
The first man was the fae who had seen Samuel and the rest out. He was tall, taller than Samuel, with seafoam eyes. For the first time, I realized he was the water fae whod broken into the bookstore. The second man was short by human standards but not oddly so. His skin was green and rippled like the waves of an ocean at sea. Like the fairy queen, he had wings on his back, though his were grayish and leathery and less insectlike.
One of the women was carrying a chair. She was nearly human in appearance except that her eyes were orange and her skin pale, pale blue. The second woman was covered, head to toe, with sleek brown hair about two inches long, and her arms were a third again as long as they should have been. She was carrying a narrow silver ring just big enough to fit around my neck.
At the sight of the silver ring, I tried to run. The tall man caught me and sat me in the chair while the woman whod carried it in tied me into it: wrists, elbows, and ankles.
Then they put the silver collar around my neck.
Once she has them in thrall, only she can release them.
It took me too long to find your secrets, Mercedes, she said. Phin was the owner, but Ariana has him safely guarded in the reservation, where none of mine can get him. You gave it to your friend, but he has given it over to the werewolves, and we cannot go there either.
How long had I been out, and what had I told her? I didnt remember all of it, and that worried me.
The fairy queen was wearing a different dress than she had been. This one was blue and gold. Did that mean it was a different day? Or just that shed gotten things on her dress and had to change?
They have left me only vengeance for now. Her eyes gave that weird flutter. Eventually, they will not guard the Silver Borne as diligently, and I will have it. Until then, Ill take what I can get. I hope you enjoy your victory.
Mercedes Athena Thompson, she said, putting a hand on my forehead. Look at me.
The Look at me part was inside my head. It reminded me of the way Mary Jos voice had entered my head in the bowling alley. Maybe without that experience, the queens voice wouldnt have seemed so clearly foreign.
You want to serve me. Nothing else matters.
Adam mattered.
If I didnt make it out of here alive, hed think it was his fault. That if hed been in better shape, Id have brought him with me, and hed have saved the day. Hed take responsibility for the world if someone (like me) wasnt around to shake him up. So I had to survivebecause Adam mattered to me.
The fairy queen had continued to talk in my head, but I wasnt paying attention to what she said.
Whom do you serve? she asked aloud, pulling her hand away from my head. Not as though she were interested in the answer.
Choose this day whom you will serve,I murmured.But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.It seemed appropriate to quote Joshua at her.
What? she asked, startled.
What were you expecting me to answer? I asked, feeling a little let down. Some of the very old fae react poorly to scripture, but this one didnt seem to mindnot the scriptures anyway.
Bring her to the hall, she said, her eyelashes beating her cheekbones with the force of her temper.
The men picked me up, chair and all, and hauled me back to the hall. I had only vague memories of what had happened to me there at the hands of the witchmy mother once told me that childbirth was like that. All that pain, then nothing. But if my mind had blocked out the worst of it, my body seemed to make up for it. As we got closer and closer, my stomach clenched, and I broke out in a sweat. By the time we made it into the hall, I wouldnt have been surprised if the men carrying me could smell my fear.
They brought me right up to the throne before setting me down.
What did you do? the queen hissed at the witch, who shrank back from her. What did you do that she resists me?
Nothing, my queen, the witch said. Nothing that would allow her to resist you. She is only half-human. Perhaps that is the problem.
The queen released her and stormed back to me. She took a silver knife out of her belt and cut my arm right over the bite Samuel had given me. The bite marks were still fresh-looking, so I hadnt lost a lot of time.
She rubbed her fingers in my blood and put them in her mouth. Then she cut herself and dribbled three drops into the open wound on my arm.
She was going to use old magic to bind us together. This was the stuff the wolves got out to make someone pack.
I had a sudden panicky thought. If she got me, could she get to the pack through me? Zee had been worried about her enthralling the wolves.
My blood to yours, she said, and it was too late to do anything about what she was doing. My silver, my magic, our blood makes you mine. Because it was done.
A fog rolled over my head.
I struggled and struggled, but there was nothing to struggle against; it was only fog that seemed to cover everything and muffle my thoughts.
Chapter 15
AFTER STRUGGLING AND STRUGGLING, I FOUND MYself alone, standing on a great barren field of snow. The cold was so great that it froze my nose when I breathed in, but, although I was naked, I wasnt uncomfortable.
Mercedes, Brans voice was breathless. Here you are! Finally.
I turned all around and couldnt see him.
Mercedes, he told me, I can talk to you because you are part of Adams pack and his pack is mine, too. But you need to listen because I cant hear you. All I can do is show you what I think you need.
All right, I told him. It felt lonely knowing he couldnt hear me. Lonely because it wasnt Adam whod found me there in the snow. I shivered though I still wasnt feeling the cold.
The biggest weapon in the arsenal of a fairy queen is enthrallment. As a member of a pack, you should be all but immune to that. But yours is a special case, and I am told that no one thought to teach you how the pack magic should work for you. Apparently my son and Adam, who should know better, assumed that it would all be instinctive because thats how it works for a wolf. When Adam found that it was not the case, he chose to wait so he could find out who had been messing with youinstead of making you safe.
There were complications, I told him sharply. I didnt like to hear him being critical of Adam. Id known what he was doing and approved of the way his mind worked.
A pause followed, and I had the distinct impression of surprise.
Im sorry for offending you, he said slowly. That I know you are offended is . . . interesting. I got the impression of a shrug, and he continued with his message. You should know that thrall magic is not so different from the pack bonds, Mercedes. The pack bonds are not built to subdue individuality to the Alpha or enforce behavior of any kind. A pack needs all its differences, and we find strength in that: a lot more strength than one stupid fairy queen who is stealing magic and using a witch. You understand me?His fury shook my whole being, he was so angry.
He wasnt angry with me, though, so it wasnt my concern.
I understand, I told him, even though he couldnt hear me. Or mostly couldnt hear me.
Im going to show you something, he said. And suddenly in the white snow there was a silver garland. This is one of your pack bonds, he told me. I couldnt see him, but I could feel him walking beside me as we followed the garland. We stopped by the end, and there was a rock tied . . . enveloped in a soft cage of silver. The rock glowed a warm yellow that was very welcome in this cold place.
Christmas garlands and a rock? he said, a smile in his voice. Why not an ornament?
Wolves arent fragile, I told him. And theyre . . . stubborn and hard to move.
I guess that imagery works as well as anything, he allowed. Do you know who this is? Can you feel how worried she is for you?
Mary Jo, I said. And once hed pointed it out to me, I could feel it, too. Could feel that she was looking for me, running on four feet to use her nose to its best advantage. She wasnt hot on the trailand I had the impression of miles traveled and miles to go stretching out both ways in weary infinity.
It is not usually so clear, Bran said, pulling me out of Mary Jo. Partially it is because I am with youand I am the Marrok. Another part is that the fairy has locked you into your own headI can tell that by the quality of my contact with you. That she has done this is an unforgivable offenseonce more I felt him try to contain his angerbut that will give you strength here you would not otherwise have had. He paused. The connection between you and me is stronger than it should be, too. Im not getting words back, but there is something . . . No use getting distracted with the why of that now. We have other tasks.
He took me to another silver garland and had me tell him whom it belonged to. After the third, I could find the strands myself without his guidance. The fourth was Pauls. He was running with Mary Joand just as anxious to find me. He still didnt like Warren, though. I could see that his garland and Mary Jos were intertwined and connected to all the other garlands, too. One by one we walked by the rocks that were the wolves in the pack.
Bran held me at Darryls, when I would have hurried on because I wanted to find Adam.
No, he said. I want you to look here for a bit. Can you find Darryls connection to Auriele? Its different from the pack bonds.
I looked and looked. I found Aurieles rock nearby, but I couldnt see anything. Finally, in desperation, I picked up Darryls rock and saw that it moved Aurieles, tooas if they were tied together . . . and then I couldnt understand how Id missed the blazing gold rope between them, it was so obvious. Maybe Id been looking too hard for a silver garland and instead their bond was very differentsofter, stronger, and deeper. Unlike the pack bond, it wasnt tied onto the rocks; it originated in one and ended in the other.
Bran took me by the elbow. Okay, quit playing with them. Youre making Darryl unhappy. I have another one to show you.
He led me to the center of all the strands of silver.
All but buried in the pack magic was a very, very black rock. It radiated anger and fear and sorrow so strongly it was hard to go near it.
Dont be frightened, Bran said, and there was a rough affection in his voice. Adam has been frightening quite enough people lately. Look and tell me what you see.
This was Adam? I ran up to the rock and put both hands on it. Hes hurt, I said, then corrected myself. Hes hurting.
Where is your mate bond?
It lay in the snow, a fragile and worn thing. There were a lot of places where it had been roughly knotted, just to keep it together.
Hastily made in need, which isnt necessarily a bad thing, the Marrok said, but that was compounded by rough handling by a bunch of idiots. Most of whom should have known better.
I could see that around the knotted places, the rope was worn, as if a dog . . . or a wolf had chewed on it until someone had tied it to keep it from breaking.
Henry isnt in the pack anymore, said Bran. Just in case you hadnt noticed. Ive brought him to my pack for a little one-on-one. In a few months, I might let him go out on his own again. Most of that mess is his doing.
But I wasnt worried about the chewed sections anymore.
Its broken, I said, kneeling in the deep snow. In front of me the rope came to an abrupt ending, as if sliced by a sharp knife. Id thought that the reason I hadnt been able to feel Adam was still the overload from when hed thought I was dead. Though it had been recovering from that, hadnt it? When had I lost the connection?
It hurt to know that it was broken.
Now, that, Bran growled, was cut by black magic.
His voice was so strong in my right ear that I turnedand got a glimpse of something huge and awful that didnt look anything at all like Bran in any form Id ever seen.
I couldnt see how it would be possible until Samuel told me there was a witch involved. Between the witch and the queen, they found a weakness and broke it, he told me. And then, in a curiously amused tone, he said, And I dont scare you a bit, do I?
Why would I be afraid of you? I askedbut my focus was on the broken rope. Would I hurt Adam if I touched it?
Go ahead, said Bran. He would give anything for you to touch it again.
Mine, I said. Mine.
But I still didnt touch it.
With that superior humor he occasionally used, which made me want to hit him every time, Bran said, Im sure he can find someone else who wants it.
I grabbed it with both handsand not because I was worried there would be someone else, no matter what Bran thought. But because we belonged together, Adam bound to me, me to him. I loved it when he let me make him laughhe was a serious man by nature and weighed down by the responsibility he held. I knew he would never leave me, never let me downbecause the man had never abandoned anything in his long life. If I hadnt taken the gold rope of our bond, I knew Adam would have sat on me and hog-tied me with it. I liked that. A lot.
Mercy! This voice wasnt Brans. This voice was demanding and half-crazed. A short pause, then much more controlled, Adam said, About damned time. Found you. Mercy, were coming to get you. Just sit tight.
I wrapped his voice around me and held on tighter to the rope between us until it settled into my bones, and I didnt have to hold on anymore. Adam, I said, happily. And then added, because hed know I was teasing, Took you long enough. You were waiting for me to get myself out?
I looked around my field of snow, by then littered with cheery garland and glowing rocks. I closed my eyes and wrapped the feel of pack around me like a warm cloak. I felt the fairy queens magic touch the golden rope I shared with Adamand this time it was the queens magic that shattered.
* * *
MY GAZE WAS LOCKED WITH THAT OF THE TRAPPED forest lord. He blinked, and I jerked my eyes downand saw that my arm was still dripping blood. From the amount Id lost, I hadnt been out of it for more than a few seconds.
There, said the fairy queen. Now you are mine.
I blinked at her and tried to mold my features into the stupid expression Id seen on the other thralls as she cut the ropes that held me to the chair.
Go to the kitchens and get something to wipe the blood off the floor, she told me.
I stood up and started walking. She quit paying attention to me, because I wasnt interesting anymore. I started walking a little faster because I saw my gun on the floor by one of the benches, where someone must have kicked it. I suppose that made sense. There werent many fae who could have picked it up without hurting themselves. None of the thralls would dream of using itbut I could see that the fae might hesitate to have a thrall dispose of it.
I picked it up and turned around. Slowly, so as not to attract the attention of the fae in the roomwho were all looking at the fairy queen and not at her new thrall. The queen was leaning over the arm of her throne, talking to her witch. I shot the queen three times in the heart. The witch was watching me and smiled as I pulled the trigger.
Huh, said a voice right next to me. I turned my head and had to look down at a human-seeming child who appeared to be no more than eight or nine years old.
She smiled at me. And they were afraid something would happen to you if we waited until everyone could come to the party. Just like a coyote to spoil the fun for everyone.
The last time Id seen this fae, shed been playing with a yo-yo in the front yard of a murder scene she was guarding. I didnt know her name, just that she was plenty powerful, people were scared of her, and she was a lot older than she looked.
For an instant I almost saw something completely different standing beside me, then she smiled at me, and said, Not my glamour you dont, Mercedes.
The other fae in the room didnt move, frozen in the moment of the fairy queens death.
Yo-yo Girl walked forward to the dead queen, and I followed her. The witch had grabbed the body and was taking handfuls of the queens blood and painting it over the silver thrall necklace around her neck.
I dont think so, said Yo-yo Girl. She bent and touched the remains, and said something that might have been a word. The queens body turned to dust.
Yo-yo Girl started to back awayand then saw the forest lord in his chains beyond the throne. Somehow I dont think that shed seen him before reducing the queen to so many ashes.
The silver ring popped off the witchs neckonly to be replaced by small fingers. I heard only the echo of a whisper, then the witch was dust, too. Yo-yo Girl took a handful of the resultant gray mass, lifted it to her mouth, and licked it like an ice-cream cone.
Yum, she said to me. Her hands, her clothes, and her mouth were covered with ashes. I love witches.
Ill take chocolate, if it is all the same to you, I told her.
Mercy! roared Adam from somewhere beyond the hall.
Uh-oh, said Yo-yo Girl. Someone missed out on all the killing.
Here! I called. Were okay.
And then it was true. Because Adam was there and he had his arms around me and that made everything all right.
* * *
I KICKED THE SNOW AND STUBBED MY TOE ON THE kitchen sink. It was the night of the big rescue, and everyone was partying over at Adams house. Id been hugged and fussed over until I decided that it was a good time to go check out the remains of my home.
The snow hid a lot, and the pack had cleaned it up. Theyd had the whole month that Id been missing to do it. I suppose I was lucky it hadnt been a year or a century.
They hadnt been able to find the Elphame after Zee had been forced to let his door close. Apparently, as Zee explained it to me, the Elphame moved in relation to the reservation, and Ariana hadnt been able to find me.
It was only when the bond between Adam and me reconnected that they were able to locate the Elphame. While Zee worked to make another entrance, theyd sent Yo-yo Girl ahead to make sure I was safe. She apparently didnt need anything as crude as an entrance to find her way to the Elphame. She probably had a name besides Yo-yo Girl, but the fae are funny about names, and no one wanted to give her a real one.
The fae who had belonged to the fairy queen were being housed in the reservation temporarily. Some of them had no memory of how theyd come to follow the fairy queen. Some of them were angry that Id killed her, but not so angry theyd made any move against me. Zee said that the Gray Lords were torn between anger at the way the fairy queen had used a forest lord and a black witch, and triumph at the proof that Underhill was returning some power to all of the fae.
There wasnt much left of my trailer except for a small pile of things that might be reused. I hadnt lost the pole barn with my Vanagon inside. I hadnt lost Medea or Samuel.
The first time Id seen the place, there had been a coyote hiding under the porch, and Id taken it as an omen. When Id finally bought it, Id felt like I had a home for the first time in my life. A home no one could take away from me.
Saying good-bye?
I hadnt heard the Marrok, but Bran was like that.
Yeah. I smiled at him so hed know I didnt mind his presence.
I meant to thank you for Samuel, Bran said.
I shook my head. It wasnt me. It was Arianahave you seen them together? Arent they cute? Ariana wasnt at Adams house, though Samuel was. She wasnt quite up to bearing a pack of werewolves celebrating madly. Samuel had talked about her for twenty minutes, though.
Ariana hadnt managed to touch Samuel when he was a wolfyet, Samuel had told me. But she didnt have any trouble with Samuel the man, and she didnt have panic attacks around any of the werewolvesas long as they were calm and approached her one at a time in human form. Shed just needed a reason to work on her phobias, hed explained with great pride. Bran had smiled when Samuel said that, the smile that said the Marrok had been up to something. So he might have had something to do with her finding her way among the wolves. Or maybe he just wanted me to think that. Ive found that I do better when I dont worry too hard about what Bran can and cant do.
Ariana is a gift, said Bran. But if it hadnt been for what you did, Samuel wouldnt have been around to receive it.
Thats what friends are for, I told him. Lift you when youre downand kick you in the rump when you need it. Adam helped. Speaking of friends, thank you for the Pack Magic 101 that kept me from being Zombie Mercy.
He smiled, an expression that made him look about sixteen. If you didnt know him, it would be hard to believe that this young man with the diffident expression was the Marrok.
Did you get all of that? he asked. I wasnt sure how much made it through.
I looked at his innocent expression. How much did you get back?
He gave me wide eyes, then grinned. I think that we both were getting a bit of a boost from an interested party.
Who?
Zee had no trouble freeing the forest lord from his chains. Hes a charming fellow, by the way, very gracious as well as powerful. She kidnapped him from his own place in northern California about a year, year and a half ago. His wife and family were very glad to hear that hell be coming home soon. Daphne, the fairy queen, apparently visited the reservation and decided this would be a good place to roost. She enthralled a nasty witch and used her to grab the forest lordbecause she didnt have enough power to enthrall him.
You think he helped us?
Someone did. Id just about given up. He looked around at the remnants of my home. I have a more probable answer, but Im having a little trouble wrapping my head around it. Have you decided what you are going to do with this yet?
It was insured, I told him. I might as well replace it. Gabriel might need to live somewhere.
He and Zee had kept the shop going for the month Id been missing. His mother wasnt happy with his doing that, so he was living at Adams house. In the basementas far from Jesses bedroom as Adam could manage.
Look, said Bran. Your oak tree didnt burn down.
Yeah, I said, pleased. Scorched a bit, but I think itll be okay. I took a step toward it, and my foot caught something and moved it. I thought at first it was a broom handle, but when I bent down to retrieve it, it turned out to be my old friend the walking stick.
Ah, said Bran. I wondered where that had gotten off to.
I gave it a thoughtful look. Youve seen it?
It was sitting on the couch in Adams basement, he said. When I picked it upsuddenly all my efforts bore fruit at last, and I found you among the pack bonds as if you had never been missing.
I gave him a wry smile. It does seem to show up at interesting moments.
So, he said, have you given any thought to raising sheep?
Not at the present time, I replied dryly. No.
We walked a little more in companionable silence.
I have some photos, Bran said abruptly. Of Bryan and Evelyn. My werewolf foster family. Some of your old school pictures, too, if you want them.
Id like that, I said.
He looked back toward Adams house, and I saw that someone else was headed over.
Looks like youve been missed. Ill leave you alone. He kissed my forehead and jogged off.
He met Adam at the barbed-wire fence, and Adam said something I couldnt quite hear that made Bran laugh.
Hey, I said, as Adam approached me. His response was a blast of warmth that had me blushing.
Do you have keys to your van? he asked, his voice a dark caress that gave me goose bumps. He smelled of need and impatience.
Theyre in the van.
Good, he said, taking my arm and walking briskly toward the pole barn that had survived the fire without a scorch mark. If I had to go get my truck, someone might notice us leaving. I have keys to Warrens apartment. He said the guest room has clean sheets.
He stopped at the van. I need to drive.
Normally, Id have argued with him just on general principle, but sometimes, especially with Adam so intense that he was ready to explode, it was just better to give Alpha males their way. Without a word, I headed toward the passenger side of the van.
He didnt speed and he didnt talk. We made it to Richland without hitting a red light, but there our luck ran out.
Adam, I said gently, if you break my steering wheel, well have to walk the rest of the way to Warrens house.
He loosened his hands but didnt look at me. I put a hand on his thigh, and it vibrated under my palm.
If you want to make it to Warrens, he said, his voice almost guttural, youll have to keep your hands to yourself.
There is something incredibly arousing about being wanted. I pulled my hand back and sucked in a deep breath. Adam, I said.
The light turned green at last. I had the whimsical thought that my time in Elphame had completely skewed my internal clock, because I could have sworn we were there for hours instead of seconds.
Warren lived in an A house, one of a group of Alphabet Houses built during World War II to accommodate the exploding population of nuclear-industry workers in Richland. The one he lived in was still a duplex. Both sides were darkand the other duplex had a FOR RENT sign on the window.
Adam parked the van and slid out without looking at me. He closed the door with exquisite gentleness that said a lot about his state of mind. I got out and didnt even bother to worry about whether my prized Vanagon Syncro was lockedwhich I suppose said equally as much about my state of mind.
Adam unlocked the door of Warrens apartment and held it open for me. As soon as we were both inside, he closed the door and locked it.
When he turned to face me, his eyes were bright gold and his cheeks were flushed. If you dont want this, he told me, as he had since the . . . incident with Tim, you can say no.
Race you to the bedroom, I said, and started for the stairs.
He caught my arm in a very careful grip before I took more than two steps. Running . . . would not be a good idea right now. He was ashamed of his lack of control; maybe someone else would have missed it in his voice. Maybe I would have, too, if it werent for the bond between us.
I put my hand over his and patted it. Okay, I said. Why dont you take me to bed?
I hadnt been ready for him to grab me and pick me up that fast or I wouldnt have squeaked.
He froze.
Sorry, I said. Im fine.
He took me at my word and carried me to the stairs. I halfway expected him to run, but instead his pace was deliberate, his step almost heavy. The stairs were narrow and steep, and he was careful not to bang my head or feet.
He set me down just inside the guest bedroom and closed the door. He stood there, his back to me, breathing heavily.
A month, he said. And neither Zee nor any of the fae we knew could tell us if wed ever get you back. Samuels woman couldnt find youeverything you had burned up in the fire. Neither the van nor the Rabbit worked as a close enough tie. She tried to approach me to see if she could use me, but she couldnt even walk into the same room as menot half-crazed as I was. Touching me was out of the question. I thought I had lost you.
I remembered feeling Mary Jo and Paul hunting me. You looked for me.
We did, he agreed. Abruptly he turned and hauled me against him. He was shaking, and he hid his face in my hair. It was useless, if he was trying to prevent me from understanding what he was feeling. I had a Technicolor view through our bond.
I hugged him as hard as I could so hed know I was real, that I didnt mind him holding me hard. Im here, I said.
I couldnt find you either, he told me, his voice a bare whisper. Our bond was broken, and I couldnt tell if youd done it on purpose, if the queen had managed itor if you were dead. We could feel you in the pack bonds, but thats been known to happen when people die. Bran came and he couldnt find you either. Then yesterday, Darryl was feeding us lunch and dropped the pan on the floor.
Id heard about that already, from various people, but I didnt interrupt.
Darryl thought someone was messing with Auriele, and stormed halfway up the stairsonly to be met by Auriele, who was worried about him for the same reason. Thats when Bran came up from the basement and said . . . He stopped speaking.