Seriously, Kalona, I really dont want any more drama with Neferet. I dont think I could handle it.
He threw his hands up in frustration. Why are you still speaking of the Tsi Sgili? I command you to forget her! She is nothing to us.
The instant his arms no longer imprisoned me against the stone, I scrambled sideways, determined to put some space between us. I needed to think, and I couldnt do that with his arms around me.
Kalona followed, this time backing me against one of the low parts of the rooft op walla gap in the stone teeth. There was only support as high as the back of my knees. From there up I could feel the cool wind brushing against my back and moving my hair. I didnt need to look behind me. I knew the drop-off was dizzying and that the blue of the sea waited far, far below.
You cannot escape me. Kalonas amber eyes narrowed. I saw anger beginning to simmer beneath his seductive exterior. And you must realize that I am going to rule this world very soon. I will bring the ancient ways back, and in doing so I will divide these modern people, separating the wheat from the chaff. The wheat shall stay by my side, growing and thriving as they feed me. The chaff shall be burnt into nothingness.
I felt a terrible sinking inside me. He was using old, poetic words, but I had absolutely no doubt he was describing the end of the world as I knew it, and the destruction of countless peoplevampyres, fledglings, and humans. Feeling sick, I tilted back my head and gave him a totally clueless look. Wheat? Chaff? Sorry, you lost me. Youll have to translate that into something I get.
He didnt say anything for a long moment. He only studied me silently. Then, with a slight smile curling his full lips, he reached out and caressed the side of my face with his hand. You play a dangerous game, my little lost love.
My body froze.
His hand slid slowly from my cheek down the side of my neck, searing a path of cold heat across my skin.
You toy with me. You think you can act the schoolgirl who understands nothing more than the next dress she will wear or the next boy she will kiss. You have underestimated me. I know you, A-ya. I know you too well.
Kalonas hand continued down and I sucked in a shocked gasp when he cupped my breast. He rubbed his thumb across the most sensitive spot there and a frigid stab of desire shook me. No matter how hard I tried I couldnt keep myself from trembling at his caress. There on the rooft op of my dream, with the sea behind me and Kalona before me, I was trapped by his hypnotizing touch and I knew then with a terrible certainty that it wasnt just A-yas memories that drew me to him. It was memy heartmy soulmy desires.
No, please stop. I meant for the words to come out loud and strong, a command he couldnt ignore, but instead I sounded breathy and weak.
Stop? He chuckled again. It seems you have lost your truth. You do not wish I would stop. Your body yearns for my touch. You cannot deny it. So shake off this foolish re sis tance. Accept me and your place by my side. Join me and together we will create a new world.
I swayed toward him, but managed to whisper, I cant.
If you do not join me you will be my enemy, and I will burn you with the rest of the chaff. As hed been speaking his gaze had moved from my face down to my breasts. Now he cupped both of them in his hands. His amber eyes had gone all soft and looked unfocused as he caressed me, sending icy waves of unwanted desire through my body, and sickness through my heart, my mind, and my soul.
I was trembling so hard my words sounded shaky. This is a dream only a dream. This is not real. I spoke as if to convince myself.
His lust for me made him even more seductive. He smiled intimately at me while he continued to stroke my breasts. Yes, you dream. Though there is truth and reality here, as well as your deepest, most secret desires. Zoey, in this dream you are free to do anything you wishwe can do anything you wish.
Its just a dream. I repeated the words to myself. Please, Nyx, let the power of this next truth wake me up.
I do want to be with you, I said. Kalonas smile was fierce with victory, but before he could lock me within his immortal and all-too-familiar embrace, I added, But the truth is no matter how bad I want you, Im still Zoey Redbird and not A-ya, and that means in this lifetime I have chosen to follow Nyx. Kalona, I will not betray my Goddess by giving in to you! As I shouted the last words I threw myself backward, so that I fell from the roof of the castle and plummeted toward the rocky seashore far, far below.
Through my screams I could hear Kalona crying my name.
CHAPTER 13
Zoey
I sat straight up in bed, screaming like someone had just tossed me into a pit of spiders. My ears were ringing and my body was shaking so hard that I thought I would be sick, but somewhere through my panic I realized mine wasnt the only voice screaming. I peered around in the darkness, made myself shut up, sucked air, and tried to get my bearings. Where the hell was I? At the bottom of the sea? Smashed dead on the rocks of the island?
No no I was at the Benedictine Abbey in the dorm room theyd assigned me with Aphrodite who was currently in the bed across from me screaming like a crazy woman.
Aphrodite! I yelled over her shrieks. Stop! Its me. Everythings okay.
Her scream broke off, but she was breathing in short little panicky gasps. Light! Light! she said, sounding like shed taken up residence in the Land of Panic Attacks. I need light! I need to see!
Okayokay! Hang on. Remembering the pillar candle on the end table between our beds, I fumbled awkwardly around until I felt a lighter. I had to steady my right hand by grasping my wrist with my left so that I could get the candle lit, and still it took five tries before the wick caught and the warmth of candlelight illuminated Aphrodites ghostly white face and completely blood-filled eyes.
Ohmygod! Your eyes!
I know! I know! Shit! Shit! Shit! I still cant see, she sobbed.
Dont worrydont worrythis happened last time. Ill get you a wet cloth and a drink of water, just like I did before and my words shut off as I realized the exact meaning of Aphrodites scarlet eyes, and I froze halfway between the bed and the sink. You had another vision, didnt you?
She didnt say anything. She just put her face in her hands and nodded while she sobbed.
Its okay. Its gonna be okay, I kept repeating over and over as I hurried to the sink, grabbed a hand towel, soaked it in cold water, and filled up one of two nearby glasses. Then I rushed back to Aphrodite. She was still sitting on the edge of the bed with her face in her hands. Her sobs had gone from hysterical snot-crying to pitiful little gasps. I reached around behind her and plumped her pillows. Here, drink this. Then I want you to lie back so I can put this wet towel across your eyes.
She took her hands from her face and reached blindly for the glass. I guided her to it and then watched as she guzzled down the whole thing. Ill get you more in a second. Lie back first and put this over your eyes.
Aphrodite leaned back against the propped-up pillow. She blinked blindly up at me. She looked scarily horrible. Her eyes were completely bloody and looked bizarre and ghostly framed by her too-white face.
I can see the outline of you, just a little, she said faintly. But youre all red, like youre bleeding. Aphrodite finished on a hiccupy sob.
Im not bleeding; Im fine. This happened before, remember? And you were okay after you closed your eyes and rested for a while.
I remember. I just dont remember it being this bad.
She closed her eyes. I folded the towel and placed it gently across them. Then I lied, It was this bad last time, too.
Her hands fluttered by the towel for a second before they dropped to her sides. I went back to the sink and filled up the glass again. Watching her reflection in the mirror I said, Was the vision terrible?
I saw her lips quiver. She drew a long, shaky breath. Yes.
I came back to the bed. Do you want more water?
She nodded. I feel like Ive just run a marathon through a blazing desertnot that I ever would. All that sweating is so unattractive.
Glad she was sounding more like herself, I smiled and guided her hand to the glass of water again. Then I sat on my bed facing her and waited.
I can feel you looking at me, she said.
Sorry. I thought I was being patient by not saying anything. I paused. Do you want me to go get Darius? Or maybe Damien? Or both of them?
No! Aphrodite said quickly. I saw her swallow a couple of times, and then, in a calmer voice, she continued. Dont go anywhere for a little while, okay? I dont want to be alone right nownot when I cant see.
Okay. I wont go anywhere. You want to tell me about the vision?
Not particularly, but I suppose I have to. I saw seven vampyres. They looked importantpowerful, all obviously High Priestesses. They were in a seriously gorgeous place. Definitely old money and none of that nouveau riche crap that tends to decorate with questionable taste. I rolled my eyes at her, which she, sadly, couldnt see. At first I didnt even know it was a vision. I thought it was a dream. I was watching these vamps sitting in chairs that looked like thrones and waiting for something freakily dreamish to happen, like they all turn into Justin Timberlake, jump up, and start stripping for me and singing about bringing sexy back.
Huh, I said. Interesting dream. He is totally dorkishly hot, even though hes getting old.
Oh, give it a rest. You already have way too many boys to even dream about another one. Leave Justin to me. So, anyway, they didnt turn into Justin, nor did they strip. I was just wondering what was going on when it became mega-obvious I was having a vision because Neferet walked in.
Neferet!
Yeah. Kalona was with her. She did all the talking, but the vamps werent watching her. They couldnt stop gawking at Kalona.
I didnt say so, but I knew how they felt.
Neferet was saying something about accepting the changes she and Erebus brought, moving everything, bringing old ways back blah blah
Erebus! I interrupted her blah-blahing. Shes still claiming Kalona is Erebus?
Yeah, and she was also calling herself Nyx Incarnate, which she shortened to just Nyx, but I didnt catch everything she was saying because it was about then that I started to burn up.
Burn up? Like you caught on fire?
Well, it wasnt me exactly. It was some of the vamps. It was weirdone of the weirdest visions Ive ever had, actually. One part of me was watching Neferet talking to the seven vamps, and at the same time another part of me was leaving the room, one by one, with them. I could feel that not all of them believed what Neferet was saying, and it was those vamps I stayed with. Until they burned.
Do you mean they just caught on fire?
Yeah, but it was real strange. One second I could tell that they were thinking negative things about Neferet, and the next they were on fire, but when they burned they were in the middle of a field. And it wasnt just them burning. Aphrodite paused and drained the rest of the glass of water. Lots of other people burned with themhumans, vamps, and fledglings. All of them were burning in this same field, which seemed to expand to include the whole damn world.
What?
Yeah, it was seriously bad. Ive never had a vision about vamps dying. Well, except those two I had about you, and youre just a fledgling so I dont count them.
I wasted energy frowning at her, which she couldnt see. Did you recognize anyone except the burning vamps? Were Neferet and Kalona there, too?
Aphrodite didnt say anything for a moment. Then she reached up and took the damp towel from her eyes. She blinked. I could tell the red was already starting to fade. She squinted at me. Thats better. I can mostly see you now. So, heres the end of the vision: Kalona was there. Neferet wasnt there. Instead, you were there. With him. And I do mean you were with him. He was all over you and you liked it. Uh, may I just say eew about having to watch that make-out scene, especially since I was watching it from the perspective of the people who were roasting while you did the nasty. Basically it was more than clear that you being with Kalona caused the world as we know it to end.
I rubbed a shaky hand across my face, like I could wipe away the memory of me as A-ya in Kalonas arms. Im never going to be with Kalona.
Okay, what Im getting ready to say is not because Im being a bitchat least not this time.
Go ahead, just say it.
Youre A-ya reincarnated.
Weve already established that, I said, my voice sounding sharper than I intended.
Aphrodite put up her hand. Hang on. Im not accusing you of anything. Its just that this ancient Cherokee girl whose soul youre kinda sharing was created to love Kalona. Right?
Yes, but you need to understand that I. Am. Not. Her. I enunciated each word slowly and distinctly.
Look, Zoey, I know that. But I also know youre a lot more attracted to Kalona than you want to admit to anyone, and that probably includes yourself. Youve already had one memory of being A-ya that was so strong it made you pass out. What if youre not completely able to control what you feel for him because the attractions been hardwired into your soul?
You think I havent already thought about that? Hell, Aphrodite, Ill stay away from Kalona! I yelled my frustration. Completely away from him. Then there will be no chance Ill ever be with him again, and your vision will not happen.
Its not that simple. The vision where youre with him wasnt the only one I had. Actually, now that I think about it, it was a little like those stupid visions I had of your death where first I saw you get your throat slit and your head basically cut off, then in the same damn vision I got to drown with you. Talk about stress.
Yes, I remember. It was my death you were seeing.
Yeah, but so far Im the only one whos experienced your deaths. Again, I say not pleasant.
Would you please finish telling me about your visions?
She gave me a long-suffering look, but continued. So, the vision split, like what happened with the two different deaths I saw for you. One minute youre sucking face and doing nasty stuff with Kalona. Oh, and I felt agony, too.
Well, yeah, that makes sense. You were burning, I said, frustrated that she couldnt just tell the darn vision.
No, I mean I felt other agony. Im pretty sure it wasnt coming from the burning people. Someone else was there, and they were definitely under duress.
Duress? That sounds really bad. My stomach was hurting again.
Yep. Seriously uncomfortable. One minute people were burning, I felt lots of agony, blah, blah, and you were doing it with the evil angel. Then everything changed. It was obviously a different dayin a different place. People were still burning and I still felt the weird agony stuff, but instead of doing the dirty with Kalona you stepped out of his arms. Not very far, though. And you said something to him. Whatever you said changed everything.
How?
You killed him and all the fire and such stopped.
I killed Kalona!
Yep. At least thats what it looked like to me.
Well, what did I say to him that had the power to do that?
She shrugged. Dont know. I couldnt hear you. I was experiencing the vision from the burning peoples perspective and feeling stupid agony from wherever; I was just a tad bit busy being in unbearable pain to pay attention to every little syllable you uttered.
Are you sure he died? Hes not supposed to be able to die; hes immortal.
It looked like it to me. Whatever you said made him disinte-grate.
He disappeared?
Actually, it was more like he exploded. Kinda. Its hard to describe because, well, I was burning and also he got really, really bright, and it was hard to see exactly what happened to him. But I can tell you he more or less faded away, and when he did, all the fire stopped and I knew everything was going to be okay.
Is that all that happened?
No. You cried.
Huh?
Yeah, after you killed Kalona, you cried. Major snot and everything. Then the vision ended and I woke up with a horrendous headache and my eyes hurting like crazy. Oh, and you were screaming like youd lost your damn mind. She gave me a long, considering look. Speaking of, why were you screaming?
I had a bad dream.
Kalona?
I really dont want to talk about it.
Too damn bad. You have to talk about it. Zoey, I saw the world burning while you and Kalona partied. Thats not a good thing.
Thats not going to happen, I said. Remember, you also saw me killing him.
What happened in your dream? she asked insistently.
He offered me the world. He said hes going to change things back to the ancient ways and he wants me to rule by his side, or some such bullpoopie. I said not no, but hell no. He said hed burn Oh my Goddess! Wait, you said the people were burning in a field? Could it have been a wheat field?
Aphrodite shrugged. I suppose. Fields pretty much all look the same to me.
My chest felt tight and my stomach hurt. He said he was going to separate the chaff from the wheat, and burn the chaff up.
What the hell is chaff?
I dont know exactly, but Im pretty sure it has something to do with wheat. Okay, try to remember. The field they were burning indid it have tall golden grassy stuff in it, or was it green, like hay or corn or something, well, not wheatlike?
It was yellow. And tall. And grassy. I suppose it could have been wheat.
So what Kalona threatened in my dream basically came true in your vision.
Except in your dream you didnt give in and start a big make-out session with him. Or did you?
No, I did not! I hurled myself off the top of a cliff, which is why I was screaming my brains out.
Her red-tinged eyes widened. Seriously? You really jumped off a cliff?
Well, I jumped off the top of a castle, and the castle was on the top of a cliff.
That sounds really bad.
It was the scariest thing Ive ever done, but it wasnt as bad as staying there with him. I shivered, remembering his touch and the terrible, soul-deep longing he made me feel. I had to get away from him.
Yeah, well, youre going to need to rethink that in the future.
Huh?
Would you try to pay attention? I saw Kalona taking over the world. He was using fire to kill people, and by people I mean vamps and humans. And you stopped him. Honestly, I think my vision is telling us youre the only person alive who can stop him. So you cant run away from him. Zoey, youre going to have to figure out what you said that killed him and then youre going to have to go to him.
No! Im not going to him.
Aphrodite gave me a look that was full of pity. You have to fight against this reincarnation thing and destroy Kalona once and for all.
Ah, hell, was what I was thinking when someones fist banged on the door.
CHAPTER 14
Zoey
Zoey! Are you in there? Let me in!
In less than a breath I was off the bed and at the door. I wrenched it open to find Stark leaning heavily against the doorframe. Stark? What are you doing out of bed? He was wearing hospital scrub pants and no shirt. His chest was covered by a huge white gauze Band-Aid that wrapped all the way around his torso. His face was the color of bone, and a veil of sweat beaded his forehead. He was drawing short, ragged breaths and looked like he was going to fall over any second.
But in his right hand he clutched his bow, and it was notched with an arrow.
Shit! Get him in here before he passes out. If he falls down, well never get him up again, and hes too damn big to drag around.
I tried to grab Stark, but surprising me with his strength, he shook me off. No, Im fine, he said, stalking into the room and looking around us like he expected someone to jump out of the closet. Im not going to pass out, he spat out as he got his breathing under control.
I stepped in front of him, calling his attention back to me. Stark, theres no one here. What are you doing here? You shouldnt even be out of bed, let alone climbing stairs.
I felt you. You were terrified. So I came to you.
I had a bad dream, thats all. I wasnt in any danger.
Kalona? Was he in your dream again?
Again? How long have you been dreaming about him? Aphrodite asked.
Unless youre sleeping with someone, and I dont mean just a roommate, Kalona can get into your dreams if he wants to, Stark said.
That doesnt sound good.
Theyre just dreams, I said.
Do we know that for sure? Aphrodite asked.
She directed the question to Stark, but I answered her. Well, Im not dead. So it was just a dream.
Not dead? You need to explain that, Stark said. His breathing had leveled off, and even though he still looked pale, he sounded every bit like a dangerous Warrior who was ready to fulfill his oath and protect his High Priestess.
In her dream Zoey hurled herself off the top of a cliff to get away from Kalona, Aphrodite said.
What did he do to you? Starks voice was low and filled with anger.
Nothing! I said way too quickly.
Thats because you jumped off a cliff before he could do anything, Aphrodite said.
What was he trying to do? Stark asked again.
I sighed. The same old stuff. He wants to control me. Thats not how he puts it, but its what he wants, and Im never going to give him what he wants.
Starks jaw tightened. I should have known hed try to get to you through your dreams. I know his tricks! I should have made sure you slept with Heath or Erik.
Aphrodite snorted. Thats a new one. Boyfriend number three wants you to sleep with boyfriend one or two.
Im not her boyfriend! Stark practically roared. I am her Warrior. Ive given my oath to protect her. That means more than some bullshit crush or stupid jealousy.
Aphrodite just stared at him; for once she didnt seem to know what to say.
Stark, it was just a dream, I said with a lot more conviction than I felt. It doesnt matter how many times Kalona butts into my dreams, the result is going to be the same. Im not going to give in to him.
You better make sure of that because if you do, the rest of us are in for some serious shit, Aphrodite said.
What does she mean?
She had another vision, thats all.
Thats all? Talk about being underappreciated. She gave Stark a long look. So, Arrow Boy, if you sleep with Zoey, will that keep Kalona out of her dreams?
It should, Stark said.
Then I think you should sleep with Zoey, and since three is definitely a crowd in situations like this, Im out of here.
Where are you going? I asked.
Wherever Darius is, and, no, I do not give a shit if it annoys the penguins. Seriously, I do have a massive headache. So Ill just be sleeping, but Im going to be with my vamp. And thats all there is to it.
She grabbed her clothes and her purse. I figured she was going to duck into a bathroom and change out of her granny nightgown before finding Darius, which made me remember I was standing there in my very own granny nightgown. I sat down on my bed and sighed. Oh, yeah, hed already seen me blazingly naked, which was way more embarrassing than a white cotton granny nightgown. My shoulders slumped. Goddess, for a girl who had multiple boyfriends, I was seriously impaired in the ooh-look-how-cool-I-am department.
Before Aphrodite made it out the door, I called, Dont say anything about your vision until I have a chance to think more. I mean, I hurried on, you can tell Darius, but thats it, okay?
I get it. You want to avoid hysteria. Whatever. Im not much up for listening to the nerd herd and the rest of the masses shriek, either. Get some sleep, Z. Ill see you at sunset. She gave Stark a little wave and then shut the door firmly behind her.
Stark came over to the bed, sitting heavily beside me. He flinched a little as the pain in his chest must have finally registered. He set his bow and arrow on the bedside table and gave me a rueful grin. So, I wont be needing these?
Ya think?
Which means my hands are now conveniently free. He opened his arms to me and shot me a cocky look. Why dont you come here, Z?
Hang on. I hurried over to the window, buying time while I wondered how I could move from one mans arms to another. I definitely cant rest until I make sure youre not going to incinerate, I babbled. While I was pulling the blinds I couldnt resist peeking out, and was rewarded with the sight of a day that included very little light. It was a silent gray world filled with ice and gloom. Nothing was moving. It was like life outside the abbey, along with the trees and grass and fallen power lines, had been frozen. Well, I guess this explains how you made it up here without being fried to a crisp. There is no sun out there. I kept staring out the window, mesmerized by the world turned to ice.
I knew I wasnt in any danger, Stark said from the bed. I could feel that the sun was up, but its not shining through all that icy stuff and the clouds. It was safe for me to come to you. Then he added, Z, would you come over here! My mind is telling me youre okay, but my guts still a little shaky.
I turned around, surprised that the cocky tone in his voice was gone. I left the window and put my hand in his, sitting on the edge of the bed.
I am okaya lot more okay than youd be right now if youd come rushing up here in the middle of a sunny morning.
When I felt your fear I had to come. Even at the risk of my own life. Thats part of the oath I swore to you.
Really?
He nodded, smiled, and lifted my hand to his lips. Really. Youre my lady and my High Priestess. Ill always protect you.
I cupped his face in my hand and couldnt stop staring at him, for some reason that suddenly made me cry.
Hey, dont do thatdont cry. He brushed the tears from my cheek. Come here to me.
Wordlessly, I slid in beside him, being careful not to bump his chest. He put his arm around me and I leaned against him, hoping that the warmth of his touch could wipe away the memory of Kalonas cold passion.
He does it on purpose, you know?
I didnt have to ask. I knew he was talking about Kalona.
Stark kept talking. Its not realthe stuff he makes you feel. Thats what he does. He finds a persons weakness and he uses it. Stark paused, and I could tell there was more he wanted to say. I didnt want to hear it. I wanted to curl up, and in the safety of my Warriors arms, I wanted to sleep and forget.
But I couldnt. Not after A-yas memory. Not after Aphrodites visions.
Go on, I said. What else?
His arm tightened around me. Kalona knows your weakness is the connection you have with that Cherokee girl who trapped him.
A-ya, I said.
Yeah, A-ya. Hell use her against you.
I know.
I could feel his hesitation, but finally Stark said, You want himKalona, I mean. He makes you want him. You fight against it, but he gets to you.
My stomach squeezed and I wanted to be sick, but I answered Stark honestly. I know and it scares me.
Zoey, I believe youll keep saying no to him, but if you ever give in, you can count on me to be there. Ill stand between you and Kalona, even if its the last thing I do.
I laid my head on his shoulder, remembering all too well that Aphrodite hadnt said anything about Stark being in either of her visions.
He turned his head and kissed me softly on the forehead. Oh, by the way, nice nightgown.
A little bubble of unexpected laughter escaped me. If you werent hurt Id smack you.
He gave me his cocky grin. Hey, I like it. Makes me think Im in bed with a bad little Catholic schoolgirl from one of those twisted all-girl prep schools. Want to tell me about the naked pillow fights you and your roommates used to have?
I rolled my eyes at him. Uh, maybe later when you havent just almost died.