Lover Eternal - Дж.Р.Уорд 21 стр.


She focused on the tattooed bands covering his wrist and neck. And the scars.

Ruined. Not broken.

Although she was ashamed to admit it now, the darkness in him had been the largest part of his allure. It was such an anomaly, a contrast to what she'd known from life. It had made him dangerous. Exciting. Sexy. But that was a fantasy. This was real.

He suffered. And there was nothing sexy or thrilling about that.

She picked up a towel and went over to him, laying it gently across his exposed flesh. He jumped and then clutched it to himself. As he looked up at her, the whites of his eyes were bloodshot, but he wasn't crying. Maybe she'd been mistaken about the sobbing.

"Please leave me," he said.

"I wish"

"Go. Now. No wishing, no hoping. No nothing. Just leave. And don't ever come near me again. Swear it. Swear it."

"I I promise."

Bella hurried out through his bedroom. When she was down the hall far enough, she paused and finger-combed her hair, trying to smooth it down. She could feel the thong up around her waist and left it there. She had no place to put the thing if she took it off.

Downstairs the party was still in full swing, and she felt out of place, drained. She went over to Mary, said her goodbyes, and looked around for a doggen to take her home.

But then Zsadist came into the room. He'd changed into white nylon workout clothes and had a black bag in his hand. Without looking at her at all, he walked up behind Phury, who was a couple feet away.

When Phury turned around and saw the bag, he recoiled.

"No, Z. I don't want"

"Either you do it, brother, or I'll find someone else who will."

Zsadist held out the bag.

Phury stared at it. When he took the thing, his hand shook.

The two of them left together.

CHAPTER 41

Mary put the empty platter down next to the sink and handed Rhage a tray so they could gather empties together. Now that the party was over, everyone was helping clean up.

As they went out into the foyer, she said, "I'm so glad Wellsie and Tohr have taken John in. And I would have loved to see him tonight, but I'm happy to know he's in good hands."

"Tohr told me the poor kid can't get out of bed, he's so exhausted. All he's been doing is sleeping and eating. Hey, by the way, I think you're right. Phury kind of digs Bella. He spent a lot of time looking her over. I've never seen him do that before."

"But after what you said about"

As they passed the grand staircase, a hidden door underneath it opened.

Zsadist came out. His face was battered, his workout shirt shredded. There was blood on him.

"Oh, shit," Rhage muttered.

The brother passed them, glassy black eyes not tracking. His small smile of satisfaction seemed totally out of context, like he'd had a good meal or maybe some sex instead of getting the holy hell beaten out of him. He went upstairs slowly, one leg not bending right.

"I had better go clean up Phury." Rhage gave the tray to Mary and kissed her lightly. "I might be a while."

"Why would Phury Oh God."

"Only because he was forced to. That's the only reason, Mary."

"Well take as long as you need."

But before he reached the passageway, Phury came out wearing exercise gear. He looked as spent as Zsadist was, except he didn't have a mark on him. No, that wasn't right. His knuckles were bruised and cracked. And there were smudges of blood on his chest.

"Hey, man," Rhage said.

Phury looked around and seemed startled to find himself where he was.

Rhage stepped in front of him. "My brother?"

Shell-shocked eyes focused. "Hey."

"You want to go upstairs? Hang out a little?"

"Oh, yeah, no. I'm fine." His eyes skipped to Mary. Glanced away. "I, ah, I'm fine. Yeah. Really. Party's ended, I guess?"

Rhage took the bag. Phury's pale pink shirt was sticking out of it, caught in the zipper.

"Come on, let's go up together."

"You should stay with your female."

"She understands. We go together, my brother."

Phury's shoulders sank into his torso. "Yeah, okay. Yeah, I don't I'd rather not be by myself right now."

When Rhage finally got back to his and Mary's room he knew she'd be asleep, so he closed the door silently.

There was a candle burning on the nightstand, and in the glow he saw that the bed was a mess. Mary had pushed the comforter off and scattered the pillows around. She was lying on her back, a lovely cream nightgown twisted around her waist, riding up on her thighs.

He'd never seen the silk before, knew that she'd worn it because she'd wanted tonight to be special. The sight of her cranked him up, and even though the vibration made him burn, he knelt by her side of the bed. He needed to be close to her.

He didn't know how Phury kept going, especially on nights like this. The brother's one and only love had wanted to bleed, had demanded pain and punishment. So Phury had done what he'd been asked to do, accepting the transfer of misery. Z was no doubt sleeping it off. Phury would be rattling around in his own skin for days.

He was such a good male, loyal, strong, devoted to Z. But working off the guilt over all that had happened to Zsadist was killing him.

God, how could anyone deal with beating the one they loved because that was what the person wanted?

"You smell good," Mary murmured, curling onto her side and looking at him. "Like a Starbucks."

"It's the red smoke. Phury lit up something fierce, but I don't blame him." Rhage took her hand and frowned. "You have another fever."

"It just broke. I feel much better." She kissed his wrist. "How's Phury?"

"A mess."

"Does Zsadist make him do that a lot?"

"No. I don't know what set it off tonight."

"I'm so sorry for both of them. But mostly for Phury."

He smiled at her, loving her for the way she cared about his brothers.

Mary sat up slowly, shifting her legs around so they hung off the bed. Her nightgown had a lace bodice, and through the pattern he could see her breasts. His thighs tightened and he closed his eyes.

It was hell. Wanting to be with her. Being scared of what his body would do. And he wasn't even thinking just about sex. He needed to hold her.

Her hands rose to his face. When her thumb brushed over his mouth, his lips opened of their own accord, a subversive invitation she accepted. She bent down and kissed him, her tongue penetrating, taking what he knew he should not be offering.

"Hmm. You taste good."

He'd smoked some with Phury, knowing he was coming back to her, hoping that the relaxant might take him down a little. He couldn't handle a repeat of what had happened in the billiard room.

"I want you, Rhage." She shifted, opening her legs, pulling his body against her.

Swirling energy condensed along his spine and radiated outward, punching into his hands and feet, making his nails sing with pain and his hair tingle.

He leaned back. "Listen, Mary"

She smiled and swept the nightgown over her head, tossing it so the thing fell to the floor in a swirl. Her naked skin in the candlelight tangled him up. He couldn't move.

"Love me, Rhage." She took his hands and put them to her breasts. Even as he told himself not to touch her, he cupped the swells, thumbs smoothing over her nipples. She arched her back. "Oh, yes. Like that."

He went for her neck, licking up her vein. He wanted to drink from her so badly, especially as she held his head in place as if that was what she wanted, too. It wasn't that he needed to feed. He wanted her in his body, in his blood. He wanted to be sustained by her, live off of her. He wished she could do the same with him.

She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pulled back, trying to take him down on the mattress. God help him, he let her. She was under him now, smelling of the arousal she had for him.

Rhage closed his eyes. He couldn't deny her. He couldn't stop the rush inside of him. Trapped between the two, he kissed her and prayed.

Something wasn't right, Mary thought.

Rhage was staying out of reach. When she wanted to take his shirt off, he didn't let her get to the buttons. When she tried to touch his erection, he moved his hips away. Even as he suckled her breasts and swept his hand between her legs, it was as if he were making love to her from a distance.

"Rhage" Her voice broke as she felt his lips on her navel. "Rhage, what's wrong?"

His big hands parted her legs wide, his mouth going to the inside of her thigh. He nipped at her, his fangs teasing, never hurting.

"Rhage, stop for a minute"

He put his mouth on her sex, pulling her between his lips, sucking, moving back and forth, savoring. She bowed off the bed at the sight of his blond head dipped low, his bunched shoulders under her knees, her legs so pale and thin against the massive backdrop of him.

She was going to be totally lost in another second.

Grabbing a hunk of his hair, she yanked him away from her.

His teal blue eyes shimmered with sexual power as he breathed through open, glossy lips. Deliberately he took the lower one between his teeth and sucked on it. Then his tongue did a long, slow lick of the upper one.

She closed her eyes, swelling, melting.

"What's the problem?" she croaked.

"Wasn't aware there was one." He brushed her core with his knuckles, rubbing sensitive skin. "You don't like this?"

"Of course I do."

His thumb started going in circles. "So let me get back to what I was doing."

Before he could drop his head and put that tongue on her again, she clamped her legs shut around his hand as best she could.

"Why can't I touch you?" she asked.

"We are touching." He moved his fingers. "I'm right here."

Oh, God, could she get any hotter? "No, you're not."

She tried to withdraw from him and sit up, but his free arm shot out. His palm landed on her chest, pushing her back down onto the bed.

"I'm not finished," he said in a deep rumble.

"I want to touch your body."

His gaze flared brightly. But then just like that, the glow was gone and a quick emotion passed over his face. Fear? She couldn't tell, because he lowered his head. He kissed the top of her thigh, nuzzling her with his cheek, his jaw, his mouth.

"There's nothing like your heat, your taste, your softness. Let me pleasure you, Mary."

The words gave her a chill. She'd heard them before. Back in the beginning.

His lips moved to the inside of her leg, closer to home.

"No. Stop it, Rhage." He did. "One-sided isn't sexy to me. I don't want you servicing me. I want to be with you."

His mouth tightened, and he got off the bed with a sharp surge. Was he going to leave her?

But he just knelt on the floor, arms braced on the mattress, head hanging off his shoulders. Collecting himself.

She stretched out her leg, touching his forearm with her foot.

"Don't tell me you're going to say no," she murmured.

He looked up at her. From the low position of his head, his eyes were mere slits in his face, spitting out brilliant beams of neon blue.

Arching her body, she shifted her leg, giving him a little flash of what she knew he wanted so badly.

She held her breath.

In one mighty, fluid movement, Rhage sprang up from the floor and leaped on top of her, landing between her thighs. He undid his pants and

Oh, thank you, God.

She came immediately, clenching on to all that hardness in waves. When the thundering receded, she felt him shaking above her, inside of her. She was about to tell him to let go of his self-control when she realized restraint wasn't the problem. He was having some kind of miniseizure, every muscle in his body spasming.

"Rhage?" She looked up into his face.

His eyes were glowing white.

In an attempt to calm him, she ran her hands up his back, only to feel something on his skin. A raised pattern. Lines, almost.

"Rhage, there's something on your"

He vaulted off her and went straight for the door.

"Rhage?" She grabbed the nightgown and threw it on as she went after him.

Out in the hall he paused to put his pants back together, and Mary nearly screamed. The tattoo was alive. The thing had lifted up from his back, the design throwing shadows.

And it moved even though he was still. The great dragon seethed as it stared right at her, the head and eyes trained on her as its body undulated.

Looking for a way out.

"Rhage!"

He took off like a bullet, going down to the foyer and disappearing through the hidden door under the stairs.

Rhage didn't stop running until he was well inside the training facility. When he got to the locker room, he punched open the doors and went to the communal shower. Turning on one of the showerheads, he slid down the tile and sat under a spray of cold water.

It was all so terribly clear. The vibrations. The humming. Always around Mary, especially if she was aroused.

God, he didn't know why he hadn't figured it out before. Maybe he'd just wanted to avoid the truth.

Being with Mary was different because he wasn't the only one who wanted to make love to her. The beast wanted her, too. The beast wanted out so it could take her.

CHAPTER 42

When Bella got home she couldn't settle down. After writing for an hour in her diary, she changed into some jeans and a sweatshirt and put her parka on. Outside, flurries were falling in a disorganized rush, swirling in eddies of cold air.

Zipping up the parka, she walked into the taller, rougher grass of the meadow.

Zsadist. She couldn't close her eyes and not see him lying on his back in that bathroom.

Ruined. Not broken.

She stopped and watched the snow.

She'd given him her word that she wouldn't bother him, but she didn't want to keep the promise. God help her, she wanted to try again with him

In the distance she noticed someone walking around Mary's house. Bella stiffened in fear, but then saw the dark hair, so she knew it wasn't a lesser.

Vishous was obviously working on the security-alarm installation. She waved to him and headed over.

After having talked with V at the party, she liked him tremendously. He had the kind of smarts that usually sucked the social skills right out of a vampire, but with that warrior, you had the whole package. He was sexy, all-knowing, powerful, the kind of male that made you think of having babies just to keep his DNA in the gene pool.

She wondered why he wore that black leather glove. And what the tattoos on the side of his face were about. Maybe she'd ask about those, if it seemed okay.

"I thought you wouldn't have to finish now," she called out as she came up onto the terrace. "What with Mary"

The dark-haired figure that stepped in front of her was not Vishous. And it was not alive.

"Jennifer?" the lesser said in awe.

For a split second Bella froze. Then she turned and ran, moving fast over the ground. She didn't stumble; she didn't falter. She was quick and she was sure as she crossed the meadow, even though she was terrified. If she could make it to her house, she could lock the lesser out. By the time he broke in through the glass, she'd be down in the basement where no one could get in. She'd call Rehvenge and take the underground tunnel to the other side of the property.

The lesser was behind hershe could hear the pounding of his stride and the rustle of his clothesbut he wasn't closing as they tore across the crispy, frosted grass. Training her eyes on the cheerful lights in her house, she reached down into her muscles for more speed.

The first shot of pain hit her in the thigh. The second in the middle of her back, through the parka.

Her legs slowed and her feet became flippers of enormous size. Then the distance she had to close got greater, stretched to infinity, but she kept going anyway. By the time she made it to her back door, she was weaving. Somehow she got inside, but she struggled to engage the lock with fingers that had gone boneless.

As she wheeled away and lurched for the basement, the sound of the French doors being kicked in was oddly quiet, as if it were happening somewhere far, far away.

A hand closed on her shoulder.

The fighting urge came up strong in her and she hauled off and smashed the lesser in the face with her closed fist. He was momentarily stunned and then he hit her back, sending her spinning to the ground. He rolled her over and hit her again, his open palm clapping on her cheekbone, kicking her head back against the floor.

She felt nothing. Not the slap, not her skull's impact. Which was good because she wasn't distracted as she bit him in the arm.

Flailing around together, they knocked into the kitchen table, scattering the chairs. She got free by grabbing one of the things and knocking him in the chest with it. Disorientated, panting, she crawled away.

Her body gave out at the foot of the basement stairs.

Lying there, she was conscious, but incapable of movement. She had a vague thought that something was dripping into her eyes. Probably her own blood, maybe some of the lesser's.

Her scope of vision swung around as she was turned over.

She looked into the lesser's face. Dark hair, pale brown eyes.

Good God.

The slayer was crying as he lifted her from the floor and cradled her in his arms. The last thing she was aware of was the sight of his tears falling to her face.

She felt absolutely nothing.

O carefully lifted the female out of the cab of his truck. He wished like hell he hadn't agreed to give up his own place so he could live at the persuasion center. He would have preferred to keep her away from the other lessers, but then again, if she were here he'd be able to make sure she didn't escape. And if any other slayer got near her well, that's what they made knives for.

As he carried the female through the door, he looked down at her face. She was so like his Jennifer. Different-colored eyes, but that heart-shaped face. The thick, dark hair. And the bodylean, perfectly proportioned.

Actually, she was more beautiful than Jennifer had been. And she hit harder, too.

He laid the female on the table and fingered the bruise on her cheek, the split lip, the marks on her throat. The fighting had been tremendous: all-out, nothing spared, no stopping until he won and held her spent body in his arms.

Staring at the vampire, he thought back to the past. He'd always been afraid he'd be the one to kill Jennifer, that some night all the hitting would cross the line. Instead he'd ended up murdering the drunk driver who'd nailed her car head-on. The bastard had been liquored up at five in the afternoon, and she'd just been coming home from work.

Taking her killer out had been easy. He'd found where the guy had lived and had waited for him to come home shit-faced. Then he'd beaten the man's head in with a tire iron and pushed him down the stairs. With the body cooling, O had driven north and east, all the way across the country.

Where he'd fallen into the Society.

A car pulled up outside. Quickly he picked up the female and carried her over to the holes. After slipping a halter around her chest, he opened the lid of one and dropped her inside.

"You got another?" U asked as he came inside.

"Yeah." O made a show of looking into the other hole, at the male Mr. X had worked on the night before. The civilian was shifting in the pipe, making little scared, mewing noises.

"So let's get to work on the fresh capture," U said.

O put his boot on the cover over the female. "This one is mine. Anyone touches her and I will skin them with my teeth."

"Her? Excellent. Sensei will be psyched."

"You say nothing to him about this. We clear?"

U frowned, then shrugged. "Sure. Whatever, man. But you know he's going to find out sooner or later. When he does, just don't think it came from me."

O could actually see U keeping the secret, and on impulse he gave the slayer the address of the converted barn he'd been breaking into. A little boon in exchange for the lesser's integrity.

"The name of the female who lives there is Mary Luce. She was seen with a brother. Go get her, my man."

U nodded. "Will do, but it's close to dawn and I need to crash. I've been up for two nights too long, and I'm getting weak."

"Tomorrow then. Now leave us."

U cocked his head and glanced down at the pipe hole. "Us?"

"Get the fuck out of here, U."

U took off and O listened as the sound of the lesser's car faded.

Satisfied, he look down at the mesh cover. And couldn't stop smiling.

CHAPTER 43

Rhage did not return to the main house until five in the afternoon. As he walked through the tunnel, he made no sound. He'd taken his shoes off because they'd been soggy and then forgotten where he'd left them.

He was a live wire, the burn in him a roar he couldn't get rid of no matter how exhausted he was or how much weight he lifted or how far he ran. At this point, not that he'd even consider it, he couldn't imagine that having sex with a hundred different females would bring him down.

There was no escape for him, but he had to talk to Mary. He dreaded telling her he'd been condemned a century ago and had no idea how to explain that the beast wanted to have sex with her. But she needed to know why he stayed away.

He braced himself and opened their bedroom door. She wasn't there.

He went downstairs and found Fritz in the kitchen.

"Have you seen Mary?" he asked, doing his best to keep his voice level.

"Yes, sire. She departed."

Rhage's blood went glacial. "Where was she headed?"

"She didn't say."

"Did she take anything with her? Purse? Overnight bag?"

"A book. A bagel. A parka."

Outside. Rhage hit the underground tunnel and was at the Pit in half a minute. He pounded on the door.

Vishous took his damn time answering and was sporting boxer shorts and bed head when he did. "What the"

"Mary's out of the house. By herself. I need to find her."

V went from rubbing his eyes and looking cranked-off to being totally focused. He went to his computer, called up every exterior image he had, and found her curled up in the sun right against the mansion's front doors. Which was smart. If anything came at her, she'd be able to get into the vestibule in the work of a moment.

Rhage took a deep breath. "How do you get this thing to move in closer?"

"Hit zoom in the upper right-hand corner with the mouse."

Rhage zeroed in. She was feeding a couple of sparrows, throwing little pieces of her bagel at them. Every once in a while she'd lift her head and look around. The smile on her face was a private one, just a slight lift to her lips.

He touched the screen, brushing his fingertip against her face. "You know, you were wrong, my brother."

"Was I?"

"She is my destiny."

"Did I say she wasn't?"

Rhage looked across all the computer equipment, focusing on V's tattooed eye. "I am not her first lover. You told me my fate was a virgin. So you were wrong."

"I am never wrong."

Rhage frowned, rejecting out of hand the idea that some other female would mean more to him or would take Mary's place in his heart.

Man, fuck fate if it was going to try to make him love someone else. And to hell with V's prognostications.

"Must be nice to know it all," he muttered. "Or at least think you do."

As he turned and headed for the tunnel, his arm was gripped hard.

V's diamond eyes, usually so calm, were narrow and pissed off. "When I say I'm never wrong, I'm not on an ego trip. Seeing the future is a goddamned curse, my brother. You think I like knowing how everyone's going to die?'

Rhage recoiled and Vishous smiled coldly. "Yeah, chew on that. And then realize the only thing I don't know is the when, so I can't save any of you. Now, you want to tell me why I should showboat about this curse of mine?"

"Oh, God my brother. I'm sorry"

V blew out his breath. "S'all right. Look, how about you go get with your female? She's been thinking about you all afternoon. No offense, but I'm getting tired of hearing her voice in my head."

Mary leaned back against the great brass doors and looked up. Overhead, the sky was a brilliant expanse of blue, the air dry and crisp after the previous night's unseasonably early snowfall. Before the sun set, she wanted to walk the grounds, but the warmth coming through her parka made her lethargic. Or maybe it was just exhaustion. She hadn't been able to sleep after Rhage left their room, had spent all day long hoping he'd come back.

She had no idea what had happened last night. Wasn't even sure that she'd seen what she thought she had. For chrissakes, tattoos did not levitate off someone's skin. And they did not move. At least, not in her world.

Rhage wasn't the only reason for insomnia, though. It was time to find out what the doctors were going to do to her. The appointment with Dr. Delia Croce was tomorrow, and when it was over, she was going to know how bad the treatments were going to be.

God She wanted to talk to Rhage about all that. To try to get him prepared.

As the sun dipped below the tree line, a chill sank into her.

Standing up, she stretched and then went through the first of the doors into the vestibule. When those had closed, she showed her face to a camera and the inner set opened.

Rhage was sitting on the floor right next to the entrance. He got up slowly. "Hi. I've been waiting for you."

She smiled awkwardly, shifting her book back and forth between her hands. "I wanted to tell you where I was. But you'd left your cell phone behind when you"

"Mary, listen, about last night"

"Wait, before we start on that." She held up her hand. Took a deep breath. "I'm going to the hospital tomorrow. For the consultation before treatment starts."

His frown went so deep, his eyebrows met in the middle of his forehead. "Which hospital?"

"Saint Francis."

"What time?"

"In the afternoon."

"I want someone to go with you."

"A doggen?"

He shook his head. "Butch. The cop's good with a gun, and I don't want you unprotected. Look, can we go upstairs?"

She nodded and he took her hand, leading her up to the second floor. When they were in their bedroom, he paced incessantly while she sat on the bed.

As they talked about the doctor's appointment, it turned out preparing him was more like preparing herself. And then they were silent.

"Rhage, explain to me what happened last night." As he hesitated, she said, "Whatever it is, we'll get through it. You can tell me anything."

He stopped. Faced her. "I'm dangerous."

She frowned. "No, you aren't."

"You know what's all over my back?"

With a chill, she thought about the tattoo moving

Hold up, she told herself. It hadn't done that. He'd been breathing hard or something, and that was why the thing had appeared to have shifted positions.

"Mary, it's part of me. The beast. It's inside of me." He rubbed his chest and then his arms. Now his thighs. "I try to control it as best I can. But it I don't want to hurt you. I don't know what to do. Even now, being around you, I'm Christ, I'm a fucking mess."

As he held out hands that trembled, he did look totally strung out.

"Part of the reason why I have to fight is that combat brings me down," he said. "And it's what the females were about. I took them because the release helped keep the beast at bay. Except now that I can't have sex, I'm unstable. That's why, last night, I almost lost it. Twice."

"Wait a What are you talking about? You have me. Make love with me."

"I can't let that happen anymore," he said through gritted teeth. "I can't lay with you anymore."

Stunned, she just stared at him. "You mean, you won't be with me at all? Ever again?"

He shook his head. "Never."

"What the hell? You want me." Her eyes flicked down to the thick bulge in his pants. "I can see you're hard. I can smell the need you have for me."

Suddenly his eyes stopped blinking and flashed white.

"Why do your eyes change?" she whispered.

"Because it comes alive."

As she fell silent, he began to breathe in a strange rhythm. Two draws in, one long exhale. Two short gasps, one slow blow.

She struggled to come to grips with what he was saying. And failed, for the most part. He must mean that he had some kind of hard-core alter ego, she thought.

"Mary, I can't lay with you because when I'm with you it wants out." Two more quick breaths. "It wants"

"What, exactly?"

"It wants you." He backed away from her. "Mary, it wants to be inside of you. Do you understand what I'm saying? My other side wants to take you. I I have to go now."

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