Report says, answered Butler, that such a circumstance would not have distressed her majesty beyond endurance.
Aweel, said Mrs. Howden, the sum o the matter is, that, were I a man, I wad hae amends o Jock Porteous, be the upshot what like ot, if a the carles and carlines in England had sworn to the nay-say.
I would claw down the Tolbooth door wi my nails, said Miss Grizel, but I wad be at him.
Ye may be very right, ladies, said Butler, but I would not advise you to speak so loud.
Speak! exclaimed both the ladies together, there will be naething else spoken about frae the Weigh-house to the Water-gate, till this is either ended or mended.
The females now departed to their respective places of abode. Plumdamas joined the other two gentlemen in drinking their meridian (a bumper-dram of brandy), as they passed the well-known low-browed shop in the Lawnmarket, where they were wont to take that refreshment. Mr. Plumdamas then departed towards his shop, and Mr. Butler, who happened to have some particular occasion for the rein of an old bridle (the truants of that busy day could have anticipated its application), walked down the Lawnmarket with Mr. Saddletree, each talking as he could get a word thrust in, the one on the laws of Scotland, the other on those of syntax, and neither listening to a word which his companion uttered.
CHAPTER FOURTH
Elswhair he colde right weel lay down the law,
But in his house was meek as is a daw.
There has been Jock Driver the carrier here, speering about his new graith, said Mrs. Saddletree to her husband, as he crossed his threshold, not with the purpose, by any means, of consulting him upon his own affairs, but merely to intimate, by a gentle recapitulation, how much duty she had gone through in his absence.
Weel, replied Bartoline, and deigned not a word more.
And the laird of Girdingburst has had his running footman here, and cad himsell (hes a civil pleasant young gentleman), to see when the broidered saddle-cloth for his sorrel horse will be ready, for he wants it agane the Kelso races.
Weel, aweel, replied Bartoline, as laconically as before.
And his lordship, the Earl of Blazonbury, Lord Flash and Flame, is like to be clean daft, that the harness for the six Flanders mears, wi the crests, coronets, housings, and mountings conform, are no sent hame according to promise gien.
Weel, weel, weelweel, weel, gudewife, said Saddletree, if he gangs daft, well hae him cognoscedits a very weel.
Its weel that ye think sae, Mr. Saddletree, answered his helpmate, rather nettled at the indifference with which her report was received; theres mony ane wad hae thought themselves affronted, if sae mony customers had cad and naebody to answer them but women-folk; for a the lads were aff, as soon as your back was turned, to see Porteous hanged, that might be counted upon; and sae, you no being at hame
Houts, Mrs. Saddletree, said Bartoline, with an air of consequence, dinna deave me wi your nonsense; I was under the necessity of being elsewherenon omniaas Mr. Crossmyloof said, when he was called by two macers at oncenon omnia possumuspessimuspossimisI ken our law-latin offends Mr. Butlers ears, but it means, Naebody, an it were the Lord President himsell, can do twa turns at ance.
Very right, Mr. Saddletree, answered his careful helpmate, with a sarcastic smile; and nae doubt its a decent thing to leave your wife to look after young gentlemens saddles and bridles, when ye gang to see a man, that never did ye nae ill, raxing a halter.
Woman, said Saddletree, assuming an elevated tone, to which the meridian had somewhat contributed, desist,I say forbear, from intromitting with affairs thou canst not understand. Dye think I was born to sit here brogging an elshin through bend-leather, when sic men as Duncan Forbes, and that other Arniston chield there, without muckle greater parts, if the close-head speak true, than mysell maun be presidents and kings advocates, nae doubt, and wha but they? Whereas, were favour equally distribute, as in the days of the wight Wallace
I ken naething we wad hae gotten by the wight Wallace, said Mrs. Saddletree, unless, as I hae heard the auld folk tell, they fought in thae days wi bend-leather guns, and then its a chance but what, if he had bought them, he might have forgot to pay for them. And as for the greatness of your parts, Bartley, the folk in the close-head13 maun ken mair about them than I do, if they make sic a report of them.
I tell ye, woman, said Saddletree, in high dudgeon, that ye ken naething about these matters. In Sir William Wallaces days there was nae man pinned down to sic a slavish wark as a saddlers, for they got ony leather graith that they had use for ready-made out of Holland.
Well, said Butler, who was, like many of his profession, something of a humorist and dry joker, if that be the case, Mr. Saddletree, I think we have changed for the better; since we make our own harness, and only import our lawyers from Holland.
Its ower true, Mr. Butler, answered Bartoline, with a sigh; if I had had the luckor rather, if my father had had the sense to send me to Leyden and Utrecht to learn the Substitutes and Pandex
You mean the InstitutesJustinians Institutes, Mr. Saddletree? said Butler.
Institutes and substitutes are synonymous words, Mr. Butler, and used indifferently as such in deeds of tailzie, as you may see in Balfours Practiques, or Dallas of St. Martins Styles. I understand these things pretty weel, I thank God but I own I should have studied in Holland.
To comfort you, you might not have been farther forward than you are now, Mr. Saddletree, replied Mr. Butler; for our Scottish advocates are an aristocratic race. Their brass is of the right Corinthian quality, and Non cuivis contigit adire CorinthumAha, Mr. Saddletree?
And aha, Mr. Butler, rejoined Bartoline, upon whom, as may be well supposed, the jest was lost, and all but the sound of the words, ye said a gliff syne it was quivis, and now I heard ye say cuivis with my ain ears, as plain as ever I heard a word at the fore-bar.
Give me your patience, Mr. Saddletree, and Ill explain the discrepancy in three words, said Butler, as pedantic in his own department, though with infinitely more judgment and learning, as Bartoline was in his self-assumed profession of the lawGive me your patience for a momentYoull grant that the nominative case is that by which a person or thing is nominated or designed, and which may be called the primary case, all others being formed from it by alterations of the termination in the learned languages, and by prepositions in our modern Babylonian jargonsYoull grant me that, I suppose, Mr. Saddletree?
I dinna ken whether I will or noad avisandum, ye kennaebody should be in a hurry to make admissions, either in point of law, or in point of fact, said Saddletree, looking, or endeavouring to look, as if he understood what was said.
And the dative case, continued Butler
And the dative case, continued Butler
I ken what a tutor dative is, said Saddletree, readily enough.
The dative case, resumed the grammarian, is that in which anything is given or assigned as properly belonging to a person or thingYou cannot deny that, I am sure.
I am sure Ill no grant it, though, said Saddletree.
Then, what the deevil dye take the nominative and the dative cases to be? said Butler, hastily, and surprised at once out of his decency of expression and accuracy of pronunciation.
Ill tell you that at leisure, Mr. Butler, said Saddletree, with a very knowing look; Ill take a day to see and answer every article of your condescendence, and then Ill hold you to confess or deny as accords.
Come, come, Mr. Saddletree, said his wife, well hae nae confessions and condescendences here; let them deal in thae sort o wares that are paid for themthey suit the like o us as all as a demipique saddle would suit a draught ox.
Aha! said Mr. Butler, Optat ephippia bos piger, nothing new under the sunBut it was a fair hit of Mrs. Saddletree, however.
And it wad far better become ye, Mr. Saddletree, continued his helpmate, since ye say ye hae skeel o the law, to try if ye can do onything for Effie Deans, puir thing, thats lying up in the tolbooth yonder, cauld, and hungry, and comfortlessA servant lass of ours, Mr. Butler, and as innocent a lass, to my thinking, and as usefu in the shopWhen Mr. Saddletree gangs out,and yere aware hes seldom at hame when theres ony o the plea-houses open,poor Effie used to help me to tumble the bundles o barkened leather up and down, and range out the gudes, and suit a bodys humoursAnd troth, she could aye please the customers wi her answers, for she was aye civil, and a bonnier lass wasna in Auld Reekie. And when folk were hasty and unreasonable, she could serve them better than me, that am no sae young as I hae been, Mr. Butler, and a wee bit short in the temper into the bargain. For when theres ower mony folks crying on me at anes, and nane but ae tongue to answer them, folk maun speak hastily, or theyll neer get through their warkSae I miss Effie daily.
De die in diem, added Saddletree.
I think, said Butler, after a good deal of hesitation, I have seen the girl in the shopa modest-looking, fair-haired girl?
Ay, ay, thats just puir Effie, said her mistress. How she was abandoned to hersell, or whether she was sackless o the sinful deed, God in Heaven knows; but if shes been guilty, shes been sair tempted, and I wad amaist take my Bible-aith she hasna been hersell at the time.
Butler had by this time become much agitated; he fidgeted up and down the shop, and showed the greatest agitation that a person of such strict decorum could be supposed to give way to. Was not this girl, he said, the daughter of David Deans, that had the parks at St. Leonards taken? and has she not a sister?
In troth has she,puir Jeanie Deans, ten years aulder than hersell; she was here greeting a wee while syne about her tittie. And what could I say to her, but that she behoved to come and speak to Mr. Saddletree when he was at hame? It wasna that I thought Mr. Saddletree could do her or ony ither body muckle good or ill, but it wad aye serve to keep the puir things heart up for a wee while; and let sorrow come when sorrow maun.
Yere mistaen though, gudewife, said Saddletree scornfully, for I could hae gien her great satisfaction; I could hae proved to her that her sister was indicted upon the statute saxteen hundred and ninety, chapter oneFor the mair ready prevention of child-murderfor concealing her pregnancy, and giving no account of the child which she had borne.
I hope, said Butler,I trust in a gracious God, that she can clear herself.
And sae do I, Mr. Butler, replied Mrs. Saddletree. I am sure I wad hae answered for her as my ain daughter; but waes my heart, I had been tender a the simmer, and scarce ower the door o my room for twal weeks. And as for Mr. Saddletree, he might be in a lying-in hospital, and neer find out what the women cam there for. Sae I could see little or naething o her, or I wad hae had the truth o her situation out o her, Ise warrant yeBut we a think her sister maun be able to speak something to clear her.
The haill Parliament House, said Saddletree, was speaking o naething else, till this job o Porteouss put it out o headIts a beautiful point of presumptive murder, and theres been nane like it in the Justiciar Court since the case of Luckie Smith the howdie, that suffered in the year saxteen hundred and seventy-nine.
But whats the matter wi you, Mr. Butler? said the good woman; ye are looking as white as a sheet; will ye tak a dram?
By no means, said Butler, compelling himself to speak. I walked in from Dumfries yesterday, and this is a warm day.
Sit down, said Mrs. Saddletree, laying hands on him kindly, and rest yeyell kill yoursell, man, at that rate.And are we to wish you joy o getting the scule, Mr. Butler?
YesnoI do not know, answered the young man vaguely. But Mrs. Saddletree kept him to point, partly out of real interest, partly from curiosity.
Ye dinna ken whether ye are to get the free scule o Dumfries or no, after hinging on and teaching it a the simmer?
No, Mrs. SaddletreeI am not to have it, replied Butler, more collectedly. The Laird of Black-at-the-Bane had a natural son bred to the kirk, that the Presbytery could not be prevailed upon to license; and so
Ay, ye need say nae mair about it; if there was a laird that had a puir kinsman or a bastard that it wad suit, theres enough said.And yere een come back to Liberton to wait for dead mens shoon?and for as frail as Mr. Whackbairn is, he may live as lang as you, that are his assistant and successor.
Very like, replied Butler, with a sigh; I do not know if I should wish it otherwise.
Nae doubt, its a very vexing thing, continued the good lady, to be in that dependent station; and you that hae right and title to sae muckle better, I wonder how ye bear these crosses.
Quos diligit castigat, answered Butler; even the pagan Seneca could see an advantage in affliction, The Heathens had their philosophy, and the Jews their revelation, Mrs. Saddletree, and they endured their distresses in their day. Christians have a better dispensation than eitherbut doubtless
He stopped and sighed.
I ken what ye mean, said Mrs. Saddletree, looking toward her husband; theres whiles we lose patience in spite of baith book and BibleBut ye are no gaun awa, and looking sae poorlyyell stay and take some kale wi us?
Mr. Saddletree laid aside Balfours Practiques (his favourite study, and much good may it do him), to join in his wifes hospitable importunity. But the teacher declined all entreaty, and took his leave upon the spot.
Theres something in a this, said Mrs. Saddletree, looking after him as he walked up the street; I wonder what makes Mr. Butler sae distressed about Effies misfortunethere was nae acquaintance atween them that ever I saw or heard of; but they were neighbours when David Deans was on the Laird o Dumbiedikes land. Mr. Butler wad ken her father, or some o her folk.Get up, Mr. Saddletreeye have set yoursell down on the very brecham that wants stitchingand heres little Willie, the prentice.Ye little rin-there-out deil that ye are, what takes you raking through the gutters to see folk hangit?how wad ye like when it comes to be your ain chance, as I winna ensure ye, if ye dinna mend your manners?And what are ye maundering and greeting for, as if a word were breaking your banes?Gang in by, and be a better bairn another time, and tell Peggy to gie ye a bicker o broth, for yell be as gleg as a gled, Ise warrant ye.Its a fatherless bairn, Mr. Saddletree, and motherless, whilk in some cases may be waur, and ane would take care o him if they couldits a Christian duty.