You worry too much about things ruining your life.
Willow knew her grandmother was referring to more than her amnesia-related recognition problem. Shed always thought Willow had overdramatized the humiliating incident that had turned her parents against her and changed the course of her life, that shed been too quick to thrust all the blame on Cal Chandler. Okay, so it wasnt all his fault. No one had forced her to sleep with Cal. Shed just loved him so fiercely, and shed been so afraid of losing him. How could she know her parents would catch them?
I wish hed just get married, she mumbled. Then maybe she could really forget him and move on.
He still pines for you, you know. You cant hate a man forever simply because he loved you too much.
Willow chuckled. He didnt love me. He was horny and ruined my life.
You know he loved you, Nana scolded. And still does
Dear Reader,
Imagine being unable to recognize your own motheror your ex-lover. This is the dilemma Willow Marsden faces in The Forgotten Cowboy. (If you read The Millionaire Next Door, my previous Mills & Boon American Romance novel, you might remember that Willow was injured in a car accident during a tornado.)
Willow's condition is known as prosopagnosia, and it really does exist. I became aware of it when reading a book about how to improve your memory. I was fascinated, and the first thing I thought of (predictably) was What if I created a character with this disorder? And what if she couldnt recognize her ex-boyfriend, with whom she shared a disastrous past? Its always fun to come up with a new way to cause trouble for my characters.
If you would like to learn more about this unusual disorder and hear firsthand from people who cope with it every day, check out the Internet for extensive information.
I love to hear from readers!
E-mail me at karalennox@yahoo.com
or contact me via regular mail at P.O. Box 4845,
Dallas, TX 75148.
All best,
Kara Lennox
The Forgotten Cowboy
Kara Lennox
www.millsandboon.co.uk
Books by Kara Lennox
MILLS & BOON AMERICAN ROMANCE
841VIRGIN PROMISE
856TWIN EXPECTATIONS
871TAME AN OLDER MAN
893BABY BY THE BOOK
917THE UNLAWFULLY WEDDED PRINCESS
934VIXEN IN DISGUISE*
942PLAIN JANES PLAN*
951SASSY CINDERELLA*
974FORTUNES TWINS
990THE MILLIONAIRE NEXT DOOR
1052THE FORGOTTEN COWBOY
Contents
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Prologue
Willow Marsden studied the strange woman in her hospital room. She was an attractive female in her twenties, her beauty marred by a black eye and a bandage wound around her head. The woman looked unfamiliar; she was a complete stranger. Unfortunately, the stranger was in Willows mirror.
She lay the mirror down with a long sigh. Prosopagnosiathat was the clinical name for her condition. Shed suffered a head injury during a car accident, which had damaged a very specific portion of her brainthe part that enabled humans to distinguish one face from another. For Willow, every face she saw was strange and new to hereven those of her closest friends and relatives.
Youre telling me I could be like this forever?
Dr. Patel, her neurologist, shrugged helplessly. Every recovery is different. You could snap back to normal in a matter of days, weeks, months oryes, the damage could be permanent.
What about my short-term memory? She couldnt even remember what shed had for breakfast that morning.
Again a shrug. Why was it so difficult to get a straight answer out of a doctor?
Do you think Ill be up to speed for medical school in the fall? She asked the question as casually as she dared.
Dr. Patel abruptly dropped his professional-doctor mask. I didnt know of your plans. Im sorry.
I guess thats a big, fat no. Willow softened her comment with a smile, but she had to force it. She should be grateful to be alive, to be walking and talking with no disfiguring scars. Her car accident during last weeks tornado had been a serious one and she easily could have died if not for the speed and skill of her rescuers. Right now, though, she didnt feel grateful at all. Her plans and dreams were in serious jeopardy.
Dr. Patel closed Willows chart and offered a tentative smile. Sometimes life throws us curve balls. But if your dream is to be a healer, you will find a way.
Maybe, but not at University of Texas Southwestern. Willow had fought so hard to be accepted in the first place. If she withdrew at this late date with no explanation, she had very little chance of being accepted again. And if she told them the truthwell, no medical school wants a student with cognitive dysfunction.
For Willow, that meant only one thing. She would recover sooner rather than later. Damn the prognosis. She was not going to let anyonenot even fatesnatch away her dreams.
Not this time.
She was in control of her future. In six weeks, she intended to be at med school with a fully functioning brain.
Chapter One
One week later, Willow pasted on a smile as yet another wedding guest approached the register book. This was much, much harder than shed anticipated.
Why, Willow, its so good to see you up and around! The woman was in her fifties, fashionably dressed, slender. The man with her was balding, wore glasses, carried himself with an air of self-importance.
Now, who in Cottonwood fit that description? Only about a zillion people. Im feeling much better, Willow responded, plucking the white-plumed pen from its stand and holding it out. The woman took the hint and signed the book. Willow read the signature upside-down, a skill she was quickly acquiring. The Honorable and Mrs. Milton Chatsworth. Duh! The mayor and his wife. Their daughter, Anne, had been Willows favorite babysitter.
Hows your granddaughter doing? Willow asked. Anne was now married and the mother of a darling baby daughter.
Growing like a weed, the mayor crowed. Do you want to see pictures? He reached for his wallet, but his wife, Deborah, stopped him.
Now, Milton, Willows busy. Maybe she can look at the pictures later. She gave Willow a shoulder-squeeze and the couple moved on.
Willow breathed a sigh of relief as she surreptitiously jotted notes on an index card under the table skirt. Deb. Chatsworth. Teal dress, emerald ring. Shed given up on cataloguing the men. They were all wearing gray suits and navy ties. It was as if theyd called each other last night and arranged to match. But if she could keep the women straight, that might work, since couples tended to stick together. Unfortunately, she had to write down the cues, since her memory was still so spasmodic.
At first, she hadnt wanted to attend her friend Micks wedding. It had sounded like her worst nightmarea hundred people she knew, all of them with the same face. Then shed reasoned that if she was going to cure her brain problem, she had to put herself in challenging situations and exercise her gray cells. And so far, so good. No one had even suspected she had a problem.
She turned her attention to the couple approaching her table. Ugh, another man in a gray suit. This one had blond hair and was undoubtedly handsome, though she could only judge that by objectively cataloguing his regular features, blue eyes and square jaw.
Her heart skipped a beat. Oh, please, dont let it be him. Dont let it be Cal Chandler. She was in no mood to face him, not when he was with a shapely woman in a snug red dress. Though it was tempting to rub his face in the fact that she was off to medical school in five weeks, despite everything hed done to wreck her life, she wouldnt be able to gloat with any sinceritynot when her future was again in doubt.
Just thinking about him started a slow burn in her gut. Shed gotten her life back on track despite the devastating setback shed suffered five years ago, but she couldnt say the same about him. He was practically a genius, with a degree in biomedical science. But hed blown off vet school after one year and was now wasting his life as a casual laborer on a ranch. Not that it wasnt good, honest work, but with Cals potential
Willow, the woman in the red dress said with a warm smile as she signed the book. I didnt expect to see you here. You look a little flushedare you okay?
Willow glanced at the signature and sighed with quiet relief. This handsome blond man was Jeff Hardison, her grandmothers doctor, and his wife, Allison, Cottonwoods dentist. She was spared Cal for the moment.
Willow summoned a smile. Im feeling great.
Are you sure? I could bring you some punch.
Oh, no, Im fine, Willow said reassuringly. Its just a little warm in here. Or maybe it was just her. It burned her up just thinking about all the opportunities Cal had tossed away while shed toiled through college working three jobs
Okay, she had to stop thinking about him or she was going to embarrass herself.
Its good to see you, Jeff said, sincerity tingeing his voice. You had the whole town worried for a few days.
I appreciate the concern, but Im fine now.
As the Hardisons walked away, Willow realized her grandmother was standing beside her. Pathetically, she only knew it was Nana because she recognized her gaudy rhinestone brooch.
Any problems? her grandmother asked in a stage whisper. You know, recognizing people?
Ive got a pretty good system going. Willow showed Nana her stack of index cards with their hastily written hints. No one suspects a thing.
I dont know why you dont want anyone to know, Nana said. Its nothing to be embarrassed about.
Nana, think about it. Do you want the whole town to think Im brain-damaged? Even once I make a full recovery, thats a label that could stick with me and ruin my life.
Nana clucked like a fussy hen. You worry too much about things ruining your life.
Willow knew her grandmother was referring to more than the recent accident. Shed always thought Willow had overdramatized the humiliating incident that had turned her parents against her and changed the course of her life, that shed been too quick to thrust all the blame on Cal. Okay, so it wasnt all his fault. No one had held a gun to her head and forced her to take her clothes off and have sex with Cal. But shed loved Cal so fiercely, and had been so afraid of losing him, she might as well have had a gun to her head when hed taken her virginity.
Hes here, you know, Nana said quietly.
Willow didnt have to clarify to whom Nana was referring. Her blood pressure ratcheted up a knot. He is? Where is he? Whats he wearing? Wait, let me guess. A gray suit?
Why, yes. How did you know that?
Willow smiled despite herself. Statistical analysis. Nana, how will I know him so I can avoid him?
Dont worry. I think hes avoiding you. He didnt sign the guest book, after all. But just in case, hes wearing a red carnation in his lapel.
All right. That should be easy enough to spot. Um, Nana, is he here with anyone?
You mean, a date?
Willow nodded, shame washing through her that she even cared. She shouldnt.
I didnt notice any particular girls with him.
I wish hed just get married, Willow mumbled. Then maybe she could really forget him and move on.
He still pines after you, you know.
Willow thrust out her jaw. Let him pine. As if he really would. He probably had a line of women following him around.
To err is human, Nana said. To forgive, divine.
Willow had no snappy comeback for that one. I know I should forgive him, she said softly. Its wrong to carry a grudge. Sometimes I pray that Ill find the grace to walk up to him and say, Cal, I forgive you. But I can hardly imagine it, let alone do it.
Nana clucked again. Keep trying. You cant hate a man forever simply because he loved you too much.
Willow snorted. He didnt love me. He was horny and he ruined my life.
You know he loved you, Nana scolded. Still does.
NANAS WORDS echoed in Willows head as she watched her friend Mick exchange vows with Tonya Green. Willow and Mick had been friends since high school. Theyd even dated for a few months, B.C. Before Cal. But pretty soon theyd both realized they werent happy as boyfriend and girlfriend, and theyd gone back to being platonic pals. Shed hung out with him a lot when Cal went away to college, after her freshman year.
Cal had been jealous, she recalled, though there was no reason for him to be.
Mick had struggled in recent years, trying to find himself. Hed dated literally dozens of girls while he sporadically took classes at the junior college. Then hed gotten Tonya pregnant and, after a brief freak-out, hed abruptly grown up.
Willow had been riding in Micks car the day of the tornado. Hed been hashing things out with her, using her as a sounding board as he tried to come to terms with the big changes in his life. Then the storm had sent his car crashing off a bridge and into the swollen Coombes Creek.
Unlike Willow, Mick hadnt suffered any serious injuries, but the accident had forced him to set new priorities. Now he was looking forward to his new family life. She couldnt recall ever seeing him so happy.