They were a few steps away from the front pew, where his brother and sister-in-law sat gazing down adoringly at their infant son. The sight of their utter devotion and contentment made her insides tighten another notch.
I dont think thats how your brother and his wife see it.
Rafaels jaw tightened before he shrugged. Im prepared to accede that for some the Halleys Comet effect does happen. But well wait and see if its a mirage or the real thing, shall we?
Her breath caught at the wealth of cynicism in his tone. She couldnt respond because an usher was signalling the priest that it was time to start.
The ceremony was conducted in Spanish with English translations printed out on embossed gold-edged paper.
As the minutes ticked by, she noted Rafaels profile growing even tenser. Glancing down at the sheet, she realised the moment was approaching for him to take his godson for the anointing. Despite her caution to remain unmoved, her heart softened at his obvious discomfort.
Relax. Babies are more resilient than we give them credit for. Trust me, it takes a complete idiot to drop a baby.
She was unprepared for the icy blue eyes that sliced into her. Your flattery is touching but the last thing Im thinking of is dropping my nephew.
You dont need to hide it, Rafael. Your tension is so thick its suffocating.
His eyes grew colder. Remember when I said weddings bore me?
She nodded warily.
Christenings bore me even more. Besides, Ive never been good in churches. All that piety. He gave a mock shudder. My abuela used to smack my hand because I could never sit still.
Well, Im not your grandmother so youre spared the smacking. Besides, youre a grown man now so act like one and suck it up.
Too late, she remembered certain words were like a naked invitation to Rafael. She was completely stunned when he didnt make the obvious remark. Or maybe it was a testament to just how deeply the whole ceremony was affecting him.
I just want this to be over and done with so I can resume more interesting subjects. Without due warning, his gaze dropped to the cleavage of her simple, sleeveless orange knee-length chiffon dress. The bold, heated caress resonated through her body, leaving a trail of fire that singed in delicate places. Like how delicious you look in that dress. Or how youll look out of it.
Heat suffused her face. It was no use pointing out how inappropriate this conversation was. Rafael knew very well what he was doing. And the unrepentant gleam in his eyes told her so.
Rafa... Marco de Cervantess deep voice interrupted them.
Raven glanced up and her eyes collided with steel-grey ones which softened a touch when they lit on his brother.
Like most people whod worked the X1 Premier circuit, she knew all about the de Cervantes brothers. Gorgeous beyond words and successful in their individual rights, theyd made scores of female hearts flutter, both on and off of the racing circuit.
Marco had been the dynamic ex-racer team boss and race car designer. And Rafael, also insanely gifted behind the wheel, had at the age of twenty-eight founded and established himself as CEO of X1 Premier Management, the multi-billion euro conglomerate that nurtured, trained and looked after racing drivers. Between them theyd won more medals and championships than any other team in the history of the sport.
The last year had changed everything for them, though. Marco had sold the team and married Sasha Fleming, the racing driver whod won him his last Constructors Championship and stolen his heart in the process; and Rafael had spectacularly crashed his car, nearly lost his life and stalled his racing career.
The icy jet of guilt that shot through Raven every time she thought of his accident, and her part in it, threatened to overwhelm her. Her breath caught as she desperately tried to put the incident out of her head. This was neither the time nor the place.
But then, when had timing been her strong suit?
Over and over, shed proven that when it came to being in the wrong place at the wrong time, she took first prize every single time. At sixteen, it was what had earned her the unwanted attention that had scarred what remained of her already battered childhood.
As a grown woman of twenty-three, foolishly believing shed put the past behind her, shed been proved brutally wrong again when shed met Rafael de Cervantes.
Rafaels mouth very close to her ear ripped her from her painful thoughts. Right, Im up, I believe. Which means, so are you.
Her heart leapt into her throat. Excuse me?
I can barely stand up straight, pequeña. Its time to do your duty and support me just in case it all gets too much and I keel over.
But youre perfectly capable
Rafa... Marcos voice held a touch of impatience.
Rafaels brow cocked and he held out his arm. With no choice but to comply or risk causing a scene, Raven stood and helped him up. As before, his arm came around her in an all-encompassing hold. And again, she felt the bounds of professionalism slip as she struggled not to feel the effortless, decidedly erotic sensations Rafael commanded so very easily in her. Sensations shed tried her damnedest to stem and, failing that, ignore since the first moment shed clapped eyes on the legendary racing driver last year.
What had she said to himsuck it up? She took a breath and fought to take her own advice.
They made their way to the font and Raven managed to summon a smile in answer to Sashas open and friendly one. But all through the remainder of the ceremony, Raven was drenched with the feeling that maybe, just maybe, in her haste to assuage her guilt and make amends, shed made a mistake. Had she, by pushing Rafael to take her on as his personal physiotherapist, jumped from the frying fan into the proverbial fire?
* * *
Rafael repeated the words that bound the small person sleeping peacefully in the elegant but frilly Moses basket to him. He firmed lips that wanted to curl in self-derision.
Who was he to become godfather to another human being?
Everything he touched turned to dust eventually. Sooner or later he ruined everything good in his life. Hed tried to tell his brother over and over since hed dropped the bombshell on him a month ago. Hell, as late as this morning hed tried to get Marco to see sense and change his mind about making him godfather.
But Marco, snug in his newfound love-cocoon, had blithely ignored his request to appoint someone else his sons godfather. Apparently, reality hath no blind spots like a man in love.
Was that a saying? If not, it needed to be.
He was no ones hero. He was the last person any father should entrust with his child.
He gazed down into his nephews sweet, innocent face. How long before Jack de Cervantes recognised him for what he was? An empty shell. A heartless bastard whod only succeeded at two thingsdriving fast cars and seducing fast women.
He shifted on his feet. Pain ricocheted through his hip and pelvis. Ignoring it, he gave a mental shrug, limped forward and took the ladle the priest passed him. Scooping water out of the large bowl, he poised it over his nephews head.
At the priests nod, he tipped the ladle.
The scream of protest sent a tiny wave of satisfaction through him. Hopefully his innocent nephew would take a look at him and run screaming every time he saw him. Because Rafael knew that if he had anything at all to do with his brothers child, the poor boys life too would be ruined.
As well-wishers gathered around to soothe the wailing child, he dropped the ladle back into the bowl, stepped back and forced his gaze away from his nephews adorable curls and plump cheeks.
Beside him, he heard Ravens long indrawn breath and, grabbing the very welcome distraction, he let his gaze drift to her.
Magnet-like, her hazel eyes sought and found his. Her throat moved in a visible swallow that made his fingers itch to slide over that smooth column of flesh. Follow it down to that delectable, infinitely tempting valley between her plump breasts.
Not here, not now, he thought regrettably. What was between the two of them would not be played out here in this place where dark memoriesboth living and deadlingered everywhere he looked, ready to pounce on him should he even begin to let them...
He tensed at the whirr of an electronic wheelchair, kept his gaze fixed on Raven even as his spine stiffened almost painfully. Thankfully the wheelchair stopped several feet behind him and he heard the familiar voice exchange greetings with other family members. With every pulse of icy blood through his veins, Rafael wished himself elsewhere...anywhere but here, where the thick candles and fragrant flowers above the nave reminded him of other candles and flowers placed in a shrine not very far away from where he stooda constant reminder of what hed done. A reminder that because of him, because of callous destruction, this was his mothers final resting place.
His beloved Mamá...
His breath caught as Sasha, his sister-in-law, came towards him, her now quietened son in her arm.
Sasha...something else hed ruined.
Dios...
Hes got a set of lungs on him, hasnt he? she laughed, her face radiant in the light slanting through the church windows. He almost raised the roof with all that wailing.
He took in the perfect picture mother and child made and something caught in his chest. Hed denied his mother thisthe chance to meet her grandchild.
Rafael?
He focused and summoned a half-smile. Sí, my poor eardrums are still bleeding.
She laughed again as her eyes rolled. Oh, come on, my little champs not that bad. Besides, Marco tells me he takes after you, and I dont find that hard to believe at all. She sobered, her gaze running over him before piercing blue eyes captured his in frank, no nonsense assessment. So...how are you? And dont give me a glib answer.
Thoroughly bored of everyone asking me how I am. He raised his walking stick and gestured to his frame. See for yourself, piqueña. My clever physiotherapist tells me Im between phases two and three on the recovery scale. Dios knows what that means. All I know is that Im still a broken, broken man. In more ways than he cared to count.
She gently rubbed her sons back. Youre far from broken. And we ask because we care about you.
Sí, I get that. But I prefer all this caring to be from afar. The up-close-and-personal kind gives me the...what do you English call it...the willies?
Her eyes dimmed but her smile remained in place. Too bad. Were not going to stop because you bristle every time we come near. Her determined gaze shifted to Raven, who was chatting to another guest. And I hope youre not giving her a hard time. From what I hear, shes the best physio there is.
Despite telling himself it wasnt the time or place, he couldnt stop his gaze from tracing the perfect lines of Raven Blasss body. And it was a perfect body, honed by hours and hours of gruelling physical exercise. She hadnt been lying when she said she was solid muscle and bone. But Rafael knew, from being up close and personal, that there was soft femininity where there needed to be. Which, all in all, presented a more-than-pleasing package that had snagged his attention with shocking intensity the first time hed laid eyes on her in his racing paddock almost eighteen months ago.
Of course, hed been left in no uncertain terms that, despite all indications of a very mutual attraction, Raven had no intention of letting herself explore that attraction. Her reaction to it had been viscerally blunt.
Shed gone out of her way to hammer her rejection home...right at the time when hed been in no state to be rejected...
His jaw tightened. How I choose to treat my physiotherapist is really none of your business, Sasha.
A hint of sadness flitted through her eyes before she looked down at her son. Despite what you might think, Im still your friend, so stop trying to push me away because, in case you need reminding, I push back. She glanced back at him with a look of steely determination.
He sighed. Id forgotten how stubborn you are.
Its okay. Im happy to remind you when you need reminding. Your equally demanding godson demands your presence at the villa, so well see you both there in half an hour. No excuses.
If we must, Rafael responded in a bored drawl.
Sashas lips firmed. You must. Or Ill have to leave my guests and come and fetch you personally. And Marco wouldnt like that at all.
I stopped being terrified of my big brother long before I lost my baby teeth, piqueña.
Yes, but I know you wouldnt want to disappoint him. Also, dont forget about Raven.
He glanced over his shoulder at the woman in question, who now stood with her head bent as she spoke to one of the altar boys. Her namesake hair fell forward as she nodded in response to something the boy said. From the close contact necessitated by her profession, Rafael knew exactly how silky and luxuriant her hair felt against his skin. Hed long stopped resenting the kick in his groin when he looked at her. In fact he welcomed it. Hed lost a lot after his accident, not just a percentage of his physical mobility. With each groin kick, he ferociously celebrated the return of his libido.
What about Raven? he asked.
Ive seen her in action during her training sessions. Shes been known to reduce grown men to tears. I bet I can convince her to hog-tie you to the SUV and deliver you to the villa if you carry on being difficult.
Rafael loosened his grip on his walking stick and gave a grim smile. Dios, did someone hack into my temporary Internet files and discover I have a thing for dominatrixes? Because you two seem bent on pushing that hot, sweet button.
Sashas smile widened. I see you havent lost your dirty sense of humour. Thats something to celebrate, at least. See you at the villa.
Without waiting for an answer, she marched off towards Marco, who was shaking hands with the priest. His brothers arm enfolded her immediately. Rafael gritted his teeth against the disconcerting pang and accompanying guilt that niggled him.
Hed robbed his family of so much...
So, which is it to becompliance without question or physical restraints? Raven strolled towards him, her gaze cool and collected.
The mental picture that flashed into his mind made his heart beat just that little bit faster. Nerves which his doctors had advised him might never heal again stirred, as theyd been stirring for several days now. The very male satisfaction the sensation brought sent a shaft of fire through his veins. You heard?
It was difficult not to. You dont revere your surroundings enough to keep your voice down when you air your...peccadilloes.
The laughter that ripped from his throat felt surprisingly great. Hed had nothing to laugh about for far longer than he cared to remember. Several heads turned to watch him but he didnt care. He was more intrigued by the blush that spread over Ravens face. He leaned in close. Do you think the angels are about to strike me down? Will you save me if they do? he asked sotto voce.