Flynn had to realize the baby was right there. No matter how agitatedly he was pacing around, he never even accidentally came close to that blanket. Now, though, he punched a fist into his palm. There are things I obviously have to do immediately. Call a lawyer, for one. And find out what pediatricians are in town. And maybe I should be calling my doc, too...hell, I dont know what kind of tests are done to prove or disprove parentage...
Flynn?
What? He stopped hurling himself around the office long enough to look at her. Shed had some time separate from himtime to get tough, to firm up her common sense, to put any unmanageable emotions on chill until she was ready to handle them. But it was still rough seeing that devastated look in Flynns eyes. God knew, he responded to everything volatilely and emotionallybut nothing like this. Even if hed brought every ounce of the problem on himself, hed still never had that drawn white look around his eyes before.
I think youre right...that you need to do all those things, she said quietly. But Im afraid you have a more critical priority than any of that.
His eyebrows lifted in query. Like what?
Like the baby himself, McGannon. He needs food. More diapers than were in that bag. A crib, or something to sleep in. And she put some clothes in there, but not enough to last more than a few days.
Molly... Flynn threw himself in the chair opposite her desk, and focused on her with those incredibly electric blue eyes. I cant do any of that stuff. Ive never been around a baby, wouldnt have a clue what to buy or what it needs
Neither have I. No, Flynn.
No? I didnt ask you anything.
But you were going to. I took on the baby for a few minutes because someone had toand I was glad to help. But just because Im a female doesnt make me a born expert in child care. I havent been around little ones, either. I honestly dont know any more than you do.
You have to know more than I do, Flynn muttered, and yanked a hand through his scalp. A stone would know more than I do about babies. A leaf. A slab of concrete. Ive got work on my desk higher than a mountain, a project halfway done, the phones ringing...I dont even know how to suddenly stop an entire business for a child
Flynn, she said gently, firmly. Look at him.
But he wouldnt look at the child. He just kept looking at her, with those eyes as magnetic as blue lightning. There was so much power and character in his face, more natural charisma than one man had a right to. But it was the honesty of anxiety in his expression that touched her far more now. This isnt your problem, Molly, I realize that, he said slowly. But I dont know who else to ask for help. Not until I at least figure out what Im supposed to do with him.
Molly sighed. She really couldnt imagine Bailey or Simone pinch-hitting. Not with a problem like this. Well, hes sleeping now. And I realize you really do need to make those phone calls and get some business squared away. He can stay here until he wakes up.
Flynn didnt move. Just kept looking at her with that confounded helpless expressionuntil Molly threw up her hands in exasperation.
All right, all right. After that Ill go shopping with you. I realize thatd be really hard for you to do alone, and with a baby in tow besides. But Im warning you ahead, my advice is worthless. I dont know anything! The best I can say is that between two adult heads, we should be able to handle picking out at least some basic baby supplies.
Well, darn it, she thought. That was what she thought he wantedher offering help. Yet once she suckered in that far, he still didnt look happy. Flynn invariably bellowed and barreled into most tricky life situations, but he still hadnt budged, and his voice turned bass-low and careful.
Youre angry with me, arent you. Youre not looking at me the same way, talking to me the same way. She really upset you.
Maybe youd better call her Virginie instead of she. If shes the mother of your child, I think it might be appropriate for you to remember her name.
Im not a father, he said quietly, clearly.
Look at the baby, she said again.
But he didnt. No matter what she said...no matter what you think...Ive never been careless with a woman. Not once. Not ever. There are reasons why Ive stayed unattached, reasons why I never wanted to be a father. Im not saying Ive been a saint, Molly, but I never knowingly risked a child. Im asking you to believe me.
Molly fussed with her pencils on the desk. Actually she blurted out rather clearly that shed skipped some birth control pills
I heard what she said. I heard every damn word she said. But that has nothing to do with your believing me.
McGannon... Molly felt all tangled up, unsure what was so important to him, what he wanted her to say. Look, trying to talk right now is nuts. You need to scoot. I dont have a clue how long a baby naps, but every minute is borrowed time. Get whatever business cleared away that you can.
He seemed inclined to arguebut didnt. Once he peeled out of that chair and left, Molly pressed two fingers to her temples, her gaze instinctively honing on the sleeping baby.
Shed seen Flynn thrown plenty of times. He ranted and raved as a life-style, but that was just because he was boisterously emotional by nature. At a gut level, he thrived on challenges. The more impossible the problem, the more it revved his personal engines.
But not this one. Any man would be shook up to have a baby suddenly thrown into his life, Molly realized, but Flynn...there was something more. His face had gone cold, his voice stone-harsh when hed said there were reasons why he never wanted to be a father. Something painful had to be behind that She wished she knew what. The damn man could flirt all day and then some...but Flynn never revealed anything personal about himself, had never admitted anything painful to her before. For Flynn to express that kind of gut honesty was a vulnerable measure that he was seriously shook up.
But so was she. Shook upfrom the inside out. Her pulse was still rattling. Shed been falling hard and deep for himpainfully hard, dangerously deeply. And she had no idea before that moment that Flynn was stone-set against being a father. How could she love a man who didnt want children, didnt love babies, couldnt even look at that adorable homely face snoozing on the carpet?
She didnt know him. The echo bleated in her soul. Hed bamboozled her hormones...and yes, shed known he was wild and impulsive and full of the devil. The charm that made him downright irresistible as a lover never meant he was serious husband material. But shed still never imagined that Flynn would pick up a strange woman for a one-night stand...that maybe hed seduced dozens of women the same way he turned the charm on her. Making love to him would have been a land mine for Molly. For Flynn, sex could just be another three-letter word like fun.
And in the meantime, there seemed to be a snoozing baby on her carpet that no one seemed to loveor want. Molly could too easily see herself getting roped into caretaking the little one. She recognized that Flynn honestly needed some helpsome immediate helpbut he had to have family, she told herself. Friends. Someone. She couldnt let this be her problem.
Her heart went out to the child.
Her heart went out to the child.
But only for the babys sake. Not for Flynns.
Three
Flynn, that diaper package says Newborn. I think you need a size for a much bigger baby.
You mean diapers come in different sizes? Oh. Oh, my God. You have to be kidding me. This is almost as intimidating as the aisle with the womens stockings and trying to figure out what all those egg shapes mean. However pitiful his joke, it earned him a roll of the eyes from Molly. They were making progress, Flynn thought. At least she was speaking to him againeven if the atmospheric temperature between them still hovered between freezing and subzero. So, whatd you think? Toddler size?
Thatd be my best guess.
Okeydoke. He scooped up all the toddler-size diaper packages on the shelf and dumped them into the cart. Darned if that didnt win him an outright chuckle.
McGannon, you nut, youve cleaned out their entire supply! You really think the baby needs quite that many?
Listen. Mol, as far as I can tell, this kids a leaker. Put anything in one end, and thirty seconds later it comes out the other. Im not risking running out in the middle of the night...whats next on your list?
Food. Predictably Molly had a systematic list in one hand, a sharpened pencil in the other. Im not sure what to buy. Milk and cereal-type things are pretty obvious, but I think he only has two teeth. Whatever we get, it needs to be food that he doesnt have to chew.
Marshmallows, Flynn suggested.
I had in mind something more nutritious, she said dryly.
Well, yeah. But marshmallows are a staple of life. And how about hot chocolate? Thats a good kid thing, isnt it?
Ill tell you what. You find the baby food aisle and Ill take care of making the choices. And Flynn, for Petes sake! Take your keys out of the babys mouth!
You cant be serious. You heard him when we walked in here. Until I gave him the keys, I thought he was dying. I thought someone was stabbing him in the back with a knife. I thought we were gonna be arrested for noise pollution
I believe he was trying to clearly communicate that he was slightly bored. I also believe its possible that Dylan inherited that bellow from his fathers side of the family... but we wont go into that again. I dont think your keys are a good play toythey arent clean.
Not clean? On what planet is that supposed to be relevant? Youre talking about a kid who tries to pig out on paper and carpet lint.
You think hes getting hungry? Were not even halfway through this list, and darn it! I didnt even think of a car seat. She started scribbling again. You have to have a car seat for a baby this size. Its the law.
Mol?
Hmm? She was almost too busy penciling stuff on her list to look up.
Thanks, he said quietly. For coming with me. I know Ive been making jokes, but I dont want you to think I dont seriously appreciate your helping me out.
For a few seconds the ice chips seemed to melt in her eyes.
He caught a glimmer of a spring thaw...but it didnt last. Youd better wait until were done before you thank me. When you write out the check for this, you may have a stroke.
Holy kamoly, she filled four carts before calling it quits.
Naturally Flynn had experienced the inside of a grocery store before, but never with a shopping pro. Molly zipped and zoomed down the aisles, checking things off her list, cooing to the baby and muttering about prices at the same time.
Flynn didnt have a stroke about the amount of the check, but a full-fledged panic attack hit him when they reached the parking lot.
Night had fallen faster than a stone, temperatures dropping just as swiftly. His black Lotus had a thimble-size trunk space. There wasnt a prayer of stuffing all the baby loot into his car. Her more sensible Taurus was parked next to his, gleaming white under the parking lot neon lights. Mollys face looked pearl-soft in the evening shadows, but her stockinged legs and suit jacket were inadequate protection against that crisp, sharp air and she was starting to shiver.
She was also busy. As if she didnt trust him, she took charge of Dylan, and was organizing the baby in the car seat as if she were a general attacking a strategic logistics problem. I dont think baby car seats are meant for sports cars, but I do believe hes finally secure...
Finally she lifted her head. Finallyfor the first time since this whole blasted store outing beganher eyes met his, but her gaze shifted away faster than the spin of a dime. Getting all this stuff to your place, though, is another problem entirely. Unless youve got another suggestion, I dont see we have another choice... were just going to have to fill my trunk, and then Ill follow you to your place.
I hate to ask you to do that, Flynn said, which had to be the biggest lie hed told in a year.
There just is no other way. But youd better give me your address in case I lose you in traffic.
Like a kid scared when the lights were turned off, he didnt want Molly to leave him. The feeling of dependence was totally alien. Hed grown up stubborn, sweating out his fears of the dark alone, working his way through school, never asking for anything from anyone. Given his background, hed learned young to count on no one but himself, but that kind of pride and independence had dominated his whole life.
Not now. Not tonight. At the moment he had the pride of a wilted turnip. He watched Mollys headlights in the rearview mirror, checking every few seconds to make sure he hadnt lost her on the whole drive to his place. Once past the traffic on Westnedge, the cars thinned out. For the last half mile, suburban busyness disappeared altogether and the only lights on the road belonged to the two of them.
Flynn wasnt anxiety-prone. He liked chaos. Hell, hed practically built chaos into a fife-styleand was damn content with his choice. But his heart had been beating to panicked drums ever since Virginie blew into his office that afternoon.
He hadnt stopped moving since then. Hed needed a couple of hours on the phoneto call his lawyer, to call his doctor about blood tests, and to start checking the pediatricians in town for credentials. But he barely got started on any of that before Molly showed up in his office doorway with the caterwauling minisize redhead.
His mind should have been on Dylan. And was. The problem of the baby loomed like a cyclone on his emotional horizon, but damnation, Molly was a cyclone-size problem, too. Even after intensively working together for the last six months, he couldnt explain what shed come to mean to him. He knew she was the marrying kind, that flirting too far with her was dangerous...he also knew that hed been daring her, daring himself, daring the two of them toward a cliff edge of risk that wasnt wise.
Flynn had never overvalued wisdom. He valued... life. Every day had the intrinsic capacity for adventure. There was an excitement in air, food, wateranything, everythingbut only if a guy looked, only if he opened his life to risk and all the possibilities.
Maybe he and Molly were temperamentally chalk and cheese. But hed had her regard before this. Shed liked him, he knew. Shed found something in him to respect. It went beyond hormones, beyond that nice, hot, sexual attraction firing between them with both barrels.