Dash laughed.
Jimmy said, And then I asked, Are the red bulbs more difficult to cultivate than the yellow?
Owen Greylock, Knight-Captain of the Princes Army of the West, said, You came close to a personal insult, James.
Jimmy smiled. In that strange land, what I said was far more important than what I meant. He took another drink from his ale. I might have found the girl attractive in different circumstances, but her contempt for me simply because I came from another land it made any notion of romance impossible.
Roo said, Well, you didnt seem to have any problems with that young serving girl later that night.
Jimmy smiled. I thought you were asleep.
Roo shook his head. I was, but you woke me up. I decided it was less awkward to feign sleep. Besides, Ive had friends coupling a few feet away before, in camp. He glanced at Erik.
Kitty, who had been standing behind Roo, filling ale tankards, said, Oh? in a meaningful tone, then turned and walked away.
Roo laughed, and so did the others as Erik began to blush. Whats this, then? asked Duncan Avery. Something going on between you two?
Erik said, Not that Im aware of. He glanced at Kittys retreating back. I dont think so, anyway.
Think so? said Jadow Shati. Man, there either is or there isnt. Thats simple enough even for someone as dim as you, and thats the truth.
Erik stood up. I guess. Excuse me.
Jadow laughed as Erik followed Kitty. The Sergeant from the Vale of Dreams said, Man, if that boy was any dumber when it comes to women, wed have to kill him to put him out of his misery.
Jimmy glanced at his brother, and Dash said, I dont know. Kittys a strange girl. I think she just likes having someone solid around.
Roo said, Eriks that.
Erik reached the bar and said, Kitty?
Yes, Sergeant Major? she asked coolly.
Ah He blushed again. She fixed him with an unwavering glance. I uh.
Spit it out before you choke.
What did you mean, at the table?
Mean? she asked, a skeptical expression on her face. By what?
By that Oh.
Nothing. Just Oh, as in Oh.
Erik suddenly realized he was being made a fool of, and he felt his color rising. Youre making sport of me.
She reached across the bar and patted his cheek. Its so easy to do.
What is this? he asked, losing any sense of humor in the situation. Are you mad at me?
She sighed. Im just mad at men in general.
Erik said, Well, take it out on someone else.
Her eyes narrowed. Youve suddenly got a tender side for a man whos killed dozens and bedded whores next to his friends.
Erik felt flustered. This girls attitude was getting under his skin. What would you have of me? he asked in exasperation.
Kitty studied his face a long, silent moment, then said in a low voice, I dont know.
Erik stared at her. The torchlight reflected off a faint sheen of moisture on her upper lip. She was perspiring lightly despite the cool of the evening.
After a moment, she asked, What do you want?
Erik shook his head. I dont know either, but I I didnt like the way things felt when you
Said Oh? she finished for him.
Said that way, it sounded so silly Erik had to laugh. Yes, I guess thats what I mean.
Come with me, she said. She gestured to one of the other girls that she was leaving, and led Erik through the kitchen, past the cook and his helpers, through a rear door into the courtyard behind the inn.
For a moment Erik experienced an odd sensation of familiarity; he had grown up in such a yard, with the stable and forge, well and hayloft, behind an inn. There was a wooden bench around the well, used by those too short to pull up the bucket easily, and Kitty went and sat on it, motioning for Erik to sit next to her.
Erik said, Its quiet back here.
Kitty shrugged. I never noticed. Im usually too busy.
Erik sat and Kitty leaned over and kissed him. He held still an instant, then he returned her kiss. After a long moment, she sat back, looking at him. Finally she said, Ive never done that before.
Kissed a man? Erik said, his voice showing his surprise.
Im a thief, not a whore, she said. Ive been raped and had men stick their tongues in my mouth, but Ive never kissed anyone before.
Eriks mouth hung open, and then he shut it. What about Bobby? he asked finally.
She shrugged. What about him?
Well, I thought He hesitated. Well, we just assumed you and he
She looked down. I would have, if hed asked. He was good to me. Better than I deserved, I think. I mean, he treated me roughly that night you caught me, and he threatened to hang me and the like, but mostly he made me laugh. And he kept others from hurting me. She pointed to the back of the inn. Ive got to watch for Mockers, or anyone else nosing around, but what I am now is just a barmaid. Thats not bad, cause I wont whore.
She looked down. I would have lain down for Bobby, cause he was good to me, but he didnt love me and I didnt love him. Not that way. She looked at Erik. I dont think there was anyone he loved, maybe cept for Captain Calis.
Bobby was devoted to him.
I thought for a while he might be one of those men who love other men. She made a motion with her hand, as if flipping something over. Not that I care Im no follower of Sung the Pure, but you do wonder. Then I heard he was a regular down at the White Wing, so I figure hes just got it in his head to get his itch scratched by someone whos She searched for a concept.
Not special to him? Erik supplied.
Ya, she agreed. Thats it. Like if he did it with me or someone else who wasnt a whore, it might make things you know, different.
Erik nodded that he understood.
She sighed. Bobby joked and made me laugh. At first I was scared of him, because he said he would kill me if I betrayed the Prince or the Duke, and I saw in his eyes he meant it. But after a while, when folks here treated me right, well, I stopped being afraid.
Ive got no place to go, so like it or not, this is my home. She was silent awhile, looking at the inn. Its not a bad life. I know something bigs coming. You cant work here and not figure out a few things. Soldiers who arent bragging on what theyre doing, theyre keeping secrets. So something bigs coming. I dont know what, and I think I dont want to know. She paused, and stared up at the pale moon.
Suddenly, she turned her head to face Erik. But with Bobby gone, youre the man whos been nicest to me. The men sometimes say things to the other girls, about me, but I dont mind. Its just, well, youve never been anything but nice to me.
Erik shrugged and said, I know what its like to have some tough luck, I guess.
You cant know what life is like on the street.
He said nothing, just watching her in the flickering torchlight. She went on, Girl children arent thought much of, except for whores. Theres good money for little girls in some places. She hugged herself. My mum was a whore, thats the truth. No one knows who my father was. My mum threw me out when I was six. I think maybe she was keeping me from the crib. Her whoremaster kept looking at me funny.
I got found by this man, named Daniels, and he took me to this place in the sewers. They gave me food and told me theyd take care of me, but I had to do what they said. There were other children there, too. They didnt seem too bad off. They were dirty, mostly, but they were fed.
I begged, and I learned the best dodges. I could cry like I was lost and if some mark stopped to see what the problem was, someone else cut his purse. I started being the holder after a while.
Holder? asked Erik.
Cutpurse, he gets spotted, he gets stopped by the City Watch, hed better have nothing on him that dont belong. So most Mockers work in teams. The cutpurse hands off the score as soon as he can, and the holder moves to the bagman, who takes it to Mothers.
Mothers?
Thats what the Mockers call the place we all live lived.
Oh.
She said, Anyway, I saw me mum and we talked after Id been gone a few years. She told me I had a sister, who was a whore. That was Betsy.
You found her, then?
Yes, and we got along good. She didnt like me being a thief and I didnt care much for her whoring, but we got along. I liked her. She was the only one I knew who wasnt always after me for something.
When I got these she pointed to her breasts some of the men got rough with me. If I could stay close to the other cutpurses or hang out at Mothers, I was all right. But sometimes you just cant stay in a crowd, you know what I mean?
Erik didnt, but he nodded as if he did.
I got poked a lot until I started dressing like I was when you found me, like a boy, staying dirty, not smelling good.
Erik didnt know what to say, so he remained silent.
What Im saying is Ive never done nothing with a man that was cause I wanted.
Erik waited, and when she didnt speak, he softly asked, Are you telling me you want to now?
Tears welled up in her eyes as she almost imperceptibly nodded. He sighed as he gathered her into his arms. Erik had never felt so unsure of himself before. He had been with whores since he had joined the army, and he remembered what the first one told him, to go easy, but every woman he had lain with knew more than he did. Now he was being asked to lie with a girl who knew only violence at the hands of men.
He kissed her on the cheek and then the chin, then the lips. At first she was very still, then after a few more kisses she began responding. Soon she stood and took him by the hand and led him into the barn, toward the loft where she slept.
Erik! came the familiar voice. You up there?
A sleepy wuzat? came from Kitty as she nestled in his arms. Their lovemaking had been tentative, slow, and awkward at first, then building until Erik felt he was in the midst of battle, as Kitty exploded in a riot of emotions in his arms. Laughter mixed with tears was unleashed by his touch, and at the end she lay exhausted, as did he.
A while later they made love a second time, and Kitty was much more sure of what it was she wanted. Erik had never experienced anything like this with another woman.
He wondered if he was in love.
He raised up on one arm as the caller again shouted his name. Nakor, Im going to kill you, Erik muttered as he sat up and began to dress.
Kitty came awake. Is that the funny gambler? she asked.
Erik said, Hes not being very funny at the moment.
As he pulled on his boots, she slipped her arms around his waist and said, Thank you.
He stopped. For what?
For showing me what the other girls always talked about.
Erik sat motionless for a moment. Youre welcome, I think.
She leaned her head on his shoulder. You think?
It wasnt a favor, he said in a curt tone.
Oh, you enjoyed it, too? she asked innocently.
Erik realized she was again teasing him. He was pleased it was too dark for her to see him blush. I ought to spank you for that, he muttered.
She kissed his shoulder. Some of the girls at the White Wing charge extra for that, Ive been told.
A wave of uncertainty gripped Erik, as real as a sword thrust in his chest. He turned and gripped her by the arms, harder than he intended, and when he saw the look of panic in her eyes, he instantly released his hold. Im sorry, he whispered. But I cant stand it when you mock me.
She looked at his face as tears formed in his eyes and suddenly she was crying. She laid her chin on his shoulder, cheek to cheek with him, as she whispered, Im sorry, too. I dont know how to be any other way.
I will never hurt you, he whispered.
I know, she whispered back. Im all jumbled inside. Then she pulled back and he saw she was smiling. And its your fault, Erik von Darkmoor.
He kissed her.
Soon, a cough sounded and Erik turned to see Nakors head poking up from below as he stood on the ladder to the loft. There you are!
Without a word, Erik extended his leg, pushing the ladder away from the loft, and watched it vanish, with a satisfying squawk from Nakor, into the gloom. A loud thud and an Oof of breath exploding from Nakors lungs followed.
Kitty laughed and Erik finished dressing. After a moment, as Nakor lay groaning dramatically from atop a pile of hay, Erik said, When youre done with your act, put the ladder back up.
The groaning was instantly replaced by a chuckle. You know me too well, said Nakor.
The ladder reappeared at the edge of the loft and Erik glanced at Kitty, who was dressed. He went down the ladder first, and she followed.
Nakor said, Sorry to have bothered you and your lady friend, but I needed to see you.
Why? asked Erik.
To say good-bye for a while.
Erik saw that Sho Pi, his onetime comrade-in-arms and now Nakors student, was standing silently by the doorway of the barn. Where are you going? asked Erik.
Down to Stardock again. The King has asked me to return there while Lord Arutha returns to work for his father. Then his expression turned serious. Somethings going on. Prince Erland sailed into port tonight aboard a Keshian cutter.
Erik said, Nothing we can talk about.
Nakor nodded. I think I know what you mean.
Erik said, Well, have a safe journey and let me know when you return to the city.
Nakor nodded. Well be back. He motioned for Sho Pi to follow as he left the barn, and Erik watched them vanish into the night.
That is the strangest little man, said Kitty.
You are far from the first to observe that, said Erik. Still, hes a good man and worth six when youre out on the trail. The things he knows are astonishing. He claims theres no magic, but if theres anyone whos a better magician out there, Ive not met him.
Kitty came and leaned in to Erik and he slipped his arm around her waist. What did he mean, Somethings going on?
Erik turned and kissed her. You catch spies, and you want me to talk about secrets?
She nodded, resting her cheek against his chest. I sometimes think I know what is going on, Erik, as I piece together bits of things heard here and there. Other times Im not sure even what Im doing here. Since Bobby died I often think Im in one of those places the priests talk about, one of the lesser hells. I cant leave the inn unless Ive a pair of guards with me. The Mockers have put the death mark on me, but theyre the only family Ive known.