Vampires, I said slowly, still trying to decide what I thought about this, whether to accept, question or scoff at the claim. You mean...like Dracula? The drinking-blood, turn-into-bats kind?
Ben sighed. I know how it sounds, he muttered. And thats why I couldnt tell you before. You wouldve thought I was insane. But...yes, vampires are real. They dont turn into bats or wolves or mist, as far as I know, but everything elsethe drinking blood, the coming out at nightits all true. My face mustve betrayed my disbelief, because he shook his head. I know. When Nathan told me, I thought the chemicals in the lab were affecting his brain. I told him he needed help. But then he showed me, once, what they were keeping behind closed doors. He visibly shivered. And that was enough to convince me.
Why... I couldnt believe I was asking this. Why were they keeping vampires down there, anyway? I thought you said Nathan was part of a team searching for a cure.
He was. And they were. Ben looked disturbed now, his brows drawn together in a frown. I didnt get this out of Nathan until later, but...they were experimenting on the vampires. They were using vampire blood to try to develop the cure.
Why?
Because vampires were immune to the Red Lung virus, Ben replied solemnly. Nathan told me they didnt know if it was because the vampires were, technically, dead, but none of the specimens they acquired could be infected with the virus. They were hoping to duplicate the vampires natural immunity to disease into something that could combat Red Lung. His gaze darkened, and he gripped the steering wheel tightly. But something went wrong, he said in a near whisper. The virus mutated. The cure they gave infected patientshuman patientskilled them. And turned them into those...things. He shuddered, running a hand through his hair. I was there the night they escaped. No one knows how it happened, but Nathan was attacked, bitten. Everything was chaos. We got out, came here. But I had no idea the mutated virus was airborne, that it would spread just like Red Lung.
Then... My stomach felt cold as the implication of what he was really saying hit me like a load of bricks. The virus was airborne, seeping across the country like a spill of blood. Then, youre saying that everyone who is already infected with the Red Lung virus...
Ben didnt meet my gaze. His hands gripped the steering wheel so hard his knuckles turned white. His face was ashen, and for a moment, I thought he might actually pass out.
Oh, God, he whispered, closing his eyes. What have I done? What have we done, Nate?
My hands were shaking. I clenched them in my lap and took a deep, calming breath. Id seen what Red Lung could do to a person, I knew how fast it spread, Id heard how entire communities and towns had vanished off the map in the space of a week. I imagined those towns now, only instead of bodies lying in their homes, I could see pale, screaming abominations filling the roads, destroying anything they came across.
And it had started right here. With the person in the seat next to mine.
No, that wasnt entirely fair. Ben Archer hadnt performed those experiments onI stumbled over the wordvampires. Ben hadnt created the retrovirus that was spreading across the country, turning the sick into bloodthirsty undead. He wasnt responsible for the creation of those monsters, he wasnt even a scientist. I knew that. My doctors brain accepted that.
But the part of me that felt responsible for Maggie and Jenna, that had worked like a dog to save those patients, that viewed Red Lung as an enemy that had to be destroyedthat part of me hated him. Hed brought a hidden virus into my clinic, and because of him, my patients were all dead. Worse than dead, they were monsters, rabid beasts. If Ben Archer had never darkened my doorstep, they would still be alive.
My heart pounded. Anger and rage coursed through my veins, turning them hot. Bens shotgun lay on the seat between us; without thinking, I grabbed it and flung open the door of the truck, leaping to the pavement.
Kylie!
Ben scrambled after me. I heard his footsteps round the hood of the truck, and though my hands were shaking, I planted my feet, spun around and raised the muzzle of the gun, leveling it at his chest.
He stopped, raising his hands, as I took a step backward, glaring at him down the barrel.
Lightning flickered, distant now, the storm having moved on. The lingering rain felt like cold spider webs falling across my skin.
Ben took a slow, careful step forward, still keeping his hands raised. I bared my teeth and shoved the muzzle at him, and he stopped.
Stay back! I hissed, knowing how I must look: wild and desperate, the whites of my eyes gleaming in the darkness. I felt crazy, out of control. You stay right there, Ben Archer. Dont move, or I swear Ill kill you!
Kylie. His voice was low, calming, though he didnt move from where he stood. Dont do this. Please. You cant survive out there alone.
You, I snarled, curling my lip back, have no right to tell me anything! You brought this down on our heads. My patients are dead because of you! Maggie and Jenna are dead because of you! The whole city, the whole world, maybe, is going to hell. Because of you! With every accusation, he flinched, as if my words were stones smashing into him. My throat closed up, and I took a breath to open it. All my life, I whispered, I wanted to help people, save people. Thats why I became a doctor, so I could make a difference. I wanted to beat this thing, so badly. And all it took was you waltzing into my clinic with your demon friend to destroy everything I worked for!
Then shoot me. He dropped his arms as he said it, regarding me with dead, hooded eyes. I blinked at him in shock, but he didnt move. Youre right, he said in a quiet voice. What we did, what happened at that lab, theres no excuse. We unleashed something that could destroy everything. And if I... He paused, closing his eyes. If I deserve to die for that, if killing me will make things right for you, then...do it. Opening his eyes, he met my gaze, sorrowful but unafraid. If this will bring you peace, he rasped, for Maggie and Jenna and everyone, then do what you have to. No one will fault you for pulling that trigger.
My arms shook, and the gun was cold in my hands, the curved edge of the metal trigger pressing into my skin. It would be so easy, I realizeda quick pull, barely a motion in itself. I gazed down the barrel at the body in the rain, my throat and chest tight, my mind spinning. No one would hear the gunshot this far from the city. And even if they did, no one would care.
Ben stood there, unmoving, the rain falling lightly around his shoulders, waiting to see if I would kill him.
God, Kylie, what are you doing? Youre really going to murder this man in cold blood? Horror, swift and abrupt, lanced through me. I was a doctor, sworn to save lives, regardless of circumstances or personal feelings. Ben had saved my life. If he hadnt been there when those things attacked, I would be a pile of blood and bones on the clinic floor. Just like Maggie and Jenna.
And then, all the fear, frustration, sorrow and guilt of the past three days rose up like a black wave and came crashing down. Tears blinded me, my throat closed up and the world went blurry. The gun dropped from my limp grasp, falling into the mud, as, to my horror, I started to cry.
Strong arms wrapped around me a moment later, pulling me to a broad chest. For a heartbeat, anger flashed, but it was immediately drowned by everything else. I had failed. I had lost everything, not only the patients whom I had sworn to save, but my family, my friends and, very nearly, my humanity. And now, the world was filled with monsters and things I didnt understand, I had nearly been eaten by my dead patients and I had nowhere to go, nowhere left that was familiar. I leaned into Ben and sobbed, ugly, gasping breaths that blotched my face and left the front of his shirt stained with tears.
Ben didnt say anything, just held me as I cried myself out, the rain falling around us. My back and shoulders were cold and damp, but my arms, folded to his body, and the side of my face where his cheek pressed against mine, were very warm. Eventually, the tears stopped and my breathing became normal again, but he didnt let me go. One arm was wound across the small of my back, the other rested near my shoulders, holding me to him. His head was bowed, and I could feel rough stubble against my cheek.
My arms, trapped against his chest and stomach, began to wind around his waist, to pull him to me as well, but I stopped myself. No, I thought, as my senses finally returned. Just because he saved you, do not excuse this man for what he has done. Jenna and Maggie are dead. If hed never come to your clinic, they would still be alive.
I stiffened, and Ben apparently sensed the change, for he let me go. I stepped back to compose myself, wiping my face, pulling my hair back, deliberately not looking at the man beside me. Because if I glanced up and met those haunted, soulful brown eyes, I wouldnt be able to stop myself from reaching for him again.
The shotgun still lay in the mud between us, and Ben casually reached down for it, as if it had simply fallen and hadnt been aimed at his chest a few minutes earlier. I looked at the weapon and shuddered, appalled at myself, what I had almost done.
What now? I whispered, rubbing my arms as the rain started to come down hard again. Ben hefted the shotgun to one shoulder, staring out into the darkness.
Im going home, he said without looking back. Back to the farm. Its been...too long since Ive seen everyone. If theyre still there. He paused, then added, very softly, Youre welcome to come with me. If you want.
I nodded, feeling dazed. Thanks. I...I think I will. Come with you, I mean. He finally glanced back, eyebrows raised in surprise. I shrugged, though I was a little surprised at myself, as well. Might as well. I dont have anywhere else to go.
He didnt say anything to that, and we walked back to the truck in silence. Ben pulled open the passenger door, and I slid inside, blinking as he handed me the shotgun as if nothing had happened. Shivering, I placed it on the dashboard and watched Ben use a rubber tube to siphon fuel from one of the abandoned cars into a gas can. It was a slow, tedious process, but it couldnt be helped. Many of the everyday convenienceslike ATMs, smart phones and gas pumpswere no longer working since the plague and the collapse of society. There was no one left to keep the grids going, no one to man the towers and the internet servers. It was a wake-up call for everyone, to realize how much we relied on things like electricity, running water and easy communication, and how crippling it was to go without.
When he was done, Ben slid into the drivers seat, closed the door, and sat there a moment, staring out the glass.
Are you sure youre okay with this? he asked in a near whisper, glancing at the weapon on the dashboard. I wont force you to come with me. I can drop you off anywhere between here and home.
No. I gave my head a shake. Like I said, I have nowhere to go. And I dont want to be by myself right now, not with whats happening out there. Not if those things could be spreading across the country like the plague. Ben looked away, hunching his shoulders, and I wasnt sorry. Ill figure out what to do next when we get there. If your family doesnt mind me hanging around...
They wont. Mom, especially. Shell be thrilled I finally brought home a girl.
That tiny bit of humor, forced as it was, finally coaxed a smile from me. I settled back against the leather seat and pulled down the seat belt, clicking it into place. Then lets not keep them waiting.
Ben nodded. Turning the key in the ignition, he eased the truck down the ramp and onto the empty road, and we roared off toward our destination.
Chapter Six
We drove through the night, down a road that was desolate and empty, snaking through the darkness. No cars passed us, no headlights pierced the blackness but our own. Ben and I didnt speak much, just watched the quiet, primitive world scroll by through the glass. Out here, far from cities and towns and dimly lit suburbs, it truly felt as if we were the only humans left alive. The last two people on earth.
I dozed against the window, and when I opened my eyes again, Ben was pulling into the parking lot of a small motel and shutting off the ignition. The streetlamps surrounding the lot were dead and dark but, oddly enough, a Vacancy sign flickered erratically in the window of the office.
Were stopping?
Just for a bit. Ben opened the door, and a gust of rain-scented air dispersed my drowsiness a little. Its almost dawn. I need a couple hours of sleep, at least, or Im going to drive us off the road. This looks safe enough.
It mightve looked safe enough, but he snatched the gun off the dashboard and handed me a flashlight before walking up to the office door. I followed closely, peering over my shoulder, shining the beam into windows and dark corners. We stepped up to the porch, and my heart pounded, imagining gaunt, pale faces peering through the windows. But they remained dark and empty.
After several moments of pounding on the office door and calling Hello? into the darkened interior, Ben raised the shotgun and drove the butt into the glass above the door, shattering it. Ducking inside, he emerged seconds later with a key on a wooden peg, jingling it with weary triumph. I trailed him down the walkway to a battered green door with a brass 14B on the front and watched as he unlocked the door and pushed it back. It creaked open slowly, revealing a small room with an old TV, a hideous pink-and-green armchair and a single bed.
Damn, I heard him mutter, and he glanced over his shoulder at me. Sorry, I was hoping to get one with double beds. Ill see if they have the keys to another room
Theres no need. Bringing up the flashlight, I brushed past him through the doorway. The room was stale and dusty, and the carpet probably hadnt been cleaned in years, but at least there was no stench of death and blood and decay. Were both adults, I said, attempting to be pragmatic and reasonable. We can share a bed if we have to. And I...Id feel better not sleeping alone tonight, anyway.
Are you sure?
Ben, Im a doctor. You dont have anything I havent seen before, trust me.
My voice sounded too normal, too flippant, for what was happening outside. I felt like a deflated balloon, empty and hollow. Numb. Id seen patients with post-traumatic stress disorder, having lost a loved one or even their whole family, and wondered if maybe I was heading down that same road. If perhaps this eerie calm and sense of detachment were the beginning.