There she was. He could see her through the window in the back door. She was talking on a cordless phone tucked between her chin and shoulder as she worked at the counter. She met his gaze through the glass. She flashed him a smile, a rare one of the sort hed never seen from her.
His heart stopped between beats. The usually cool and collected Paige McKaslin shone like a morning star, like the gentle light that remained even when all others stars had gone out. She yanked open the door. Youre a lifesaver, Evan.
That troublesome tightness was back in his chest. He managed a shrug, but he didnt manage to breathe. I take it you got a hold of Phil.
Hes on his way. She headed straight to the counter. He couldnt help being struck by the long pleasant line her arms made as she hung up the phone. She had beautiful hands, slender and graceful.
And exactly why was he noticing this? Dumbstruck, he padded away through the other kitchen door, the swinging one that led to the far end of the dining room, so he could avoid the pool of water.
Once he was far enough away, his ability to breathe returned, but the emotion remained jammed in his throat. At the doorway, he glanced over his shoulder at her. She was working her way around the corner and didnt seem to notice him looking.
He took one shaky step into the dining area and along the empty aisles. Only one other couple remained in the diner, finishing up their steak dinners. He fumbled onto the stool and leaned his elbows heavily on the counter. The impact of her smile remained, and his heart pounded crazily in his chest as if he needed a defibrillator.
Never had he reacted to a woman like that. Not even to Liz when hed first fallen in love with her. What was happening? He didnt know. But as he took his seat and grabbed the last of his fries, his taste buds paled. Everything seemed suddenly dim and distant. It was a strange reaction. Maybe hed hit his head harder than hed thought.
His pastor, his friends, his sons and even his brother-in-law, whom hed kept in contact with after the divorce, all told him he ought to start dating again. That he should find some nice woman to share his golden years with.
I dont want to admit to being anywhere close to having golden years.
Evan?
The fork clamored to the plate. His fingers had somehow slipped. When he managed to meet Paiges gaze, he made sure he didnt notice that she was a beautiful, graceful woman with a tender heart. He forced himself to see the efficient businesswoman, who had taken his orders, served his meals and counted back his change over the years. That was the only Paige McKaslin he could allow himself to see.
Department of Health rules. I cant be open for business unless I have working restrooms. She set a big paper bag on the counter between them and a take-out cup, capped, next to it. Your extra order of fries, a slice of banana cream pie, I know how you like it, and a hot cup of that gourmet decaf you sometimes order.
Uhthanks. What he needed was to head straight home, empty house or not, and put some distance between his stirred-up emotions and Paige McKaslin. What he needed to do was to sit in the quiet of his home, the same house where his wife had cheated on him and finally left, and then hed remember why being alone was the right choice.
Here. She reached beneath the counter and began dropping packets into the bag. Let me make sure youve got napkins and a few things. Is there anything else I can do for you?
The pie would be fine. How much do I owe you?
Nothing, goodness. After your help tonight, this is on me. Please, you didnt even get to finish eating.
No, forget it. I pay my way. He pulled out his wallet and she held up her hand.
Men. Paige appreciated Evans pride and his ethics, but she had some of her own. If you insist on paying for this meal, then Im only going to give you the next one free. In fact, maybe Ill do that anyway. She turned toward the mature couple ambling down the aisle. You, too, Mr. and Mrs. Redmond. I see that twenty you left on the table.
Well, dear, were not freeloaders, and we were nearly done anyhow, Mr. Redmond kindly answered as he took a toothpick from the holder near the register. You have a good night now. You still make the best steak in the state.
My mothers secret spices. Paige made a mental note to give the Redmonds their next meal free. She had the best customers anyone could wish forthey were so understanding! She grabbed the small white sack containing the bakers box shed filled in the kitchen and intercepted them at the front. A little something for later.
Mr. Redmond was not opposed to the gift of dessert and held the door carefully for his beloved wife. They disappeared together into the storm.
Sweet. What must it be like to have a bond like that? Paige couldnt help the pang of regret or the pull of longing in her heart. She was thirty-eight years old, too old to believe in fairy tales, so why was she still wishing for one? The long painful years after her husbands departure and the following divorce had taken their toll, as had the years of shouldering responsibilities for her family. Working sixteen-hour days seven days a week had worn her to the bone.
What she needed was a vacation.
No, what she needed, she corrected herself, as she waded to the hall closet, was a time machine so she could go back twenty years, grab that naive eighteen-year-old shed been by the shoulders, and make that foolish, stars-in-her-eyes girl see the truth about life. A truth that the grown woman in her had come to accept as a cold, hard fact.
There was no such thing as true love and no real knights in shining armor. Anything that looked like a fairy tale was either an illusion or simply wishful thinking.
Okay, that sounded bitter, but it really wasnt, she thought as she hauled out the mop. She sounded cold, but her heart wasnt that, either. If anything, Paige felt foolish. Think of all the time and heartache she could have saved herself had she understood that truth earlier in her life. Her road would have been so much smoother had she seen the worldand the man shed marriedfor what was real instead of what shed wished them both to be.
If she had, she could have focused on what truly matteredand only on that. She could have avoided wasting energy on dreams that only faded, on hopes that true love would walk into her life one day.
The hope that shed find a good man to love had faded over time, bit by bit, shade by shade until it was nothing at all.
That was how shed been living for a long, long time. She swiped the mop through the water, thinking that shed been happier this way. Alone was good. She was strong, capable and independent. She was also safe from all the harm a man could bring to a woman. Sad, trying not to remember the long-ago love shed been unable to save, she wrung the mop, listening to the water tap into the plastic bucket like rain.
As she worked, she listened to the sounds of Evan gathering up the bag and ambling down the aisle. His steps were deliberate and slow, as if he were in no hurry to leave. He drew to a stop in the breezeway between the eating area and the front counter. Do you want me to hang around until Phil gets here?
Thats nice of you, but Im used to being alone here after dark. She swiped the mop through the cold water and wrung the sponge head well. I do appreciate your help tonight. Not everyone would have gotten up to help me.
Glad I could make a difference. With my boys gone, I dont get to do that much anymore. He cleared his throat as if he had more to say, and could not.
What would it be like to come home to an empty house, she wondered? To open the door and know that her son would not be in his bedroom downstairs with his dog, listening to music or munching on potato chips or sacked-out fast asleep?
It had to be a long stretch of lonely, she thought as she went back to mopping. She didnt know what to say as Evan walked past to snag his jacket from the coat tree, she couldnt help noticing that hed gotten pretty dirty crawling around under the diner. Dust streaked his slacks.
She bent to squeeze water from the mop head. Uh, are those dry clean only?
No way. Dont even worry about it. He didnt look at her as he slid into his black jacket, pulled a baseball cap over his head and leaned against the door.
Drive safe out there, Evan. The roads have to be a mess.
You be safe, too. He cleared his throat, slid a ten and a five on the counter and took the sack. There was a challenging glint in his dark eyes as he ambled past, as if he were daring her to give the money back.
The bell overhead jangled as he strode into the night. Ill see you tomorrow.
Uh, yeah, that would be great. Ill be waitressing.
Then Ill be ordering.
He stared at her for a beat, as the night began to engulf him. In the moment before the shadows claimed him completely, she saw the essence of him, not the physical, not the expected, but the steady strength of a good man.
The door swung shut, and she was alone. Snow pinged against the windows, driven by a cruel wind, and she swore she felt the echo of it deep in her heart, in a place that had been empty to romantic love since before her son was born.
And how foolish was that, that she was wishing for the impossible now? No, not exactly wishing, but thinking that it was possible again.
Im more tired than I thought, she told herself with a chuckle as she turned the dead bolt and went back to her mopping.
Chapter Three
The house was dark. Hed forgotten to leave a light on again. Evan fumbled along the kitchen entryway. Cal had gone off to school what? seven, eight months ago, and he still couldnt get used to him being gone. It hasnt been so bad when Blake had left, for he and Cal had made the adjustment together. But thishaving them both gone, it felt like hed walked into someone elses life.
But this was his life now. He was a free man, unencumbered and carefree. Shouldnt it feel better than this? Evan tossed the keys and his battered gym bag, and slid the sack from the diner onto the counter, pushed the door to the garage shut with his foot and listened to his footsteps thump through the lonely kitchen.
Let there be light. He hit the switch and a flood of brightness shocked his eyes. Hed been outside so long, his eyes had gotten used to the darkness. The drive home had been slow and long and pitch-black. The headlights had been nearly useless in the rapid snowfall. And now, this place seemed too bright and too glaringly empty to feel like a home.
Well, he was just feeling lonely. It was Friday night, after all. Maybe one of the boys had had time to call in. That thought put some bounce in his stride as he left his briefcase on the kitchen table and leaned to check the message light on the phone recorder. Nothing.
Okay, young men had more fun things to do on Friday nights than to give their old dad a call. He was glad for them both. He wanted them to be out there, living their lives and doing well. Its just that he hadnt figured on how his own life would stand still when they were gone.
The flier one of his clients had sent him was sitting on the edge of the counter. Hed meant to toss it with the rest of yesterdays mail, but he hadnt gotten around to it yet. The apple-green paper seemed to glow neon in the half light and he pulled it out so he could look at it properly.
A Bible study for the rest of us. A bold carton caption stretched above a cartoon-like pen-and-ink drawing of a middle-aged man in his recliner. The youth have their own lives, and the singles and the seniors have their activities. What about the rest of us? Come join us for Bible study, dessert and fellowship at Field of Beans.
That was the coffee shop in townand Evan knew Paiges relatives owned it. That was a bonus, he suddenly realized. Plus, it was an evening meeting, something he could do after work. Something besides cleaning out the horse barn, that is.
He folded up the flyer and slid it in with the stack of bills needing to be paid. That was something hed been meaning to dostudy his Bible more. Now that he had the time. Maybe this was a solution to one of his lonely evenings. Maybe he would take everyones advicenot to date but to get out and do the things hed been putting off when hed been so busy raising his sons.
The phone rang while he was on his way through the family room. One of the boys? Hope jolted through him. He snatched up the cordless receiver on the second ring. Hello?
Is this Evan Thornton?
Uh In his excitement, hed forgotten to check the caller ID screen. Yeah. Who is this?
This is Michael from First National Bank, how are you this evening? I want to tell you about our new identity theft program
At least it wasnt bad news. Not interested. Goodbye.
He hung up the phone, glanced around the room at the TV remote that was on the coffee table where it belonged and not flung and lost somewhere in the room, at the chairs pushed in at the table instead of all shoved around askew. There were no stacks of books or heaps of sports equipment and coats lying around, all needing to be put away.
Would he ever get used to the quiet, to the orderliness, to the emptiness? Standing alone in the family room, which had been put into tidy order by the cleaning lady, he felt at a loss. This didnt feel like home anymore.
As he headed upstairs to change out of his work clothes and into his barn clothes, he realized this was what it meant to be unencumbered and carefree, a free man again. There was no phone ringing off the hook, no kids traipsing through the house.
Just the telemarketers and him.
Hed always known his boys were a great blessing. Hed given thanks to the Lord every night as hed lain down to sleep, but hed never stopped to see the treasured gift that each day really was, and that, for all of those eighteen years, they were surprisingly fleeting.
Well, that should just about do it. Phil the plumber tried to stomp the snow off his work boots. But considering the mud hed picked up from the crawl space, it was a hopeless cause anyway. Ive double-checked the length of the pipes and couldnt find a drop anywhere. I think weve got the problem licked.
Music to my ears. Thank you. Paige dropped the scrub brush into the soapy bucket, where shed been cleaning the water line against the bathroom wall. I appreciate this so much. I know it was a long drive out here, and its going to be worse going back.
Before you get all misty on me He gave a friendlybut not too friendlywink. Ive got bad news. Youre gonna have to replace some of this pipe. Its gonna be expensive, and if you want, I can work up an estimate. I can either do it for all new water lines, or I can do it in phases and we can just do the worst stuff first. You just let me know.