And she liked him. So far, she liked him better than any man shed met in a long time. If she were in the market for a serious relationship But she wasnt. That was the whole point.
She probably felt more free and at ease with Mac because shed decided that marriage wasnt for her. No pressure. They could discuss this issue without it being a loaded topic. Have you ever come close to getting married?
Mac sipped his wine and stared at the flames licking at the dry wood. A couple of times, but then other things werent right about the relationship. In one case she was determined to make it on Broadway, and neither of us wanted to change our lives to accommodate the other one.
How about the second person?
She was a lot of fun, but not quite what youd call mature. Eventually I got tired of being the only grown-up in the relationship. He sighed. Marriage is a big deal and Id want to get it right. I guess maybe Im too picky.
Thats what my family says about me, too. From the corner of her eye she could see that he was looking at her instead of the fire, so she turned to face him. But how can you not be picky when the stakes are so high?
Thats what I think, too. But how about you? Ever come close?
Ive had two different guys propose.
Thats pretty damn close. I mean, usually a guy wont ask unless he thinks youre likely to say yes.
Beth groaned. I know, and I felt awful each time because I turned them down.
So I figured.
But I swear, Mac, neither of them listened when I said how much I love my job and how it monopolizes my life. One of them suggested that because I love the hospitality industry Id make a great hostess when he had to entertain out-of-town clients. He expected me to cut back to part-time so Id be free to do that.
Marriage shouldnt be about giving up things you love to do.
No.
But theres He paused to clear his throat. Theres one small problem with the concept of a happy single life.
Whats that?
He took another drink of his wine. How does sex fit into the plan? He glanced over at her. Or are you saying youre willing to give that up?
Id rather not. When she met his gaze, she felt that zing again. It scooted through her body and ignited various significant parts of it. Unless she was mistaken, the feeling was mutual.
I dont want to give it up, either. After another charged moment, he broke eye contact and stared into the fire, as if realizing they might each need a moment to decide where to go from here.
Maybe she should drop the subject, which was becoming quite personal. But she found she couldnt let it go. This was a question shed wrestled with and never had the chance to discuss with a guy, especially a virile one like Mac. I mean, were both pretty young to be celibate.
I know, but Im not crazy about one-night stands, and deciding to go beyond that implies a certain level of commitment, doesnt it? He looked over at her, his gaze reflecting his uncertainty.
She swallowed. This discussion was heating up faster than the blaze in the fireplace. Yes, I suppose, but the commitment can be limited.
Can it, really? In my experience, the more you have sex with someone, the more they start thinking of making the relationship permanent.
I wouldnt. Now, how had that popped out? She took a deep breath. Speaking hypothetically, of course.
Of course. He studied the fire some more, and drummed his fingers softly against his knee.
She hoped he hadnt thought she was propositioning him with her remark. She hadnt been, but if she tried to explain, it would be even more awkward.
As she tried to figure out how to reestablish the casual mood theyd enjoyed before theyd started discussing sex, he put his wineglass on the end table and stood.
Listen, before I drink more wine or the roads get any worse, I need to make a quick trip to my cabin.
Uh, okay. She waited for him to tell her why.
He retrieved his coat from the chair in the kitchen. Ill be right back. Keep the pizza hot.
Still, she expected him to say what was so important that he had to take care of it immediately. Do you have a dog?
No. He headed for the door. See you soon. My cabin isnt far. And then he was gone.
She stared at the closed door for a long time and tried to figure out what was going on. Most men would have come up with some excuse as to why they were leaving, even if they didnt want to admit the real reason. Maybe he wasnt good at making excuses, which was actually kind of refreshing.
The timer dinged, telling her the pizza was done. She switched off the oven and hoped the pizza wouldnt dry out while he was gone. Hed said hed be right back.
In the meantime, she could work more on her project to embrace her single status. She titled the next section of her notes Reasons Why I Love Living Alone!!! Setting down her wineglass, she made a long list. When she got home shed type it up, print it and frame it to keep her focused.
CHAPTER THREE
NOT THE MOST GRACEFUL EXIT in the world, Mac thought as he drove carefully through the snowstorm to his cabin. He knew Beth had been expecting some sort of explanation, but his reasons for leaving were varied and complicated, and he wasnt prepared to give Beth any of them, at least not until hed thought things through.
Although the heater was on, the engine wasnt warm enough to heat up the cab, which was fine with him. The cold air helped him think, and he needed to think. Because his gut was telling him that, after all these years of dating, all the fix-ups arranged by his parents, hed just met the woman he was going to marry.
Which was crazy. He didnt believe in that kind of instant recognition. Hed known her forhe consulted his watchless than two hours.
Amazingly, that didnt seem to matter. His strong reaction defied all logic, but the longer he was with her, the more certain he became that she was the one he could build a life with.
And yet that made no sense, considering she was the first woman hed ever met who seriously didnt need him. She didnt need him to make her feel good about herself, and she certainly didnt need him to take care of her. She might need him in a physical sense, but shed just finished saying that having sex didnt necessarily imply a commitment of any kind.
Parking in front of his cabin, he sat in the cab and took a few deep breaths as he tried to rationalize his crazy response to Beth. She was beautiful. True, but hed dated beautiful women before without having this instinctive connection.
The chemistry was there, but hed felt chemistry before. Maybe not quite this strong, but close.
He couldnt remember ever being in such a rush to close the deal and create that ultimate physical connection with a particular woman.
Maybe it was her self-sufficiency. He enjoyed fixing things for his clients, but what a relief to find someone who didnt expect him to fix anything. Yeah Much to his surprise, he was drawn to her independent nature.
And, he had to admit, she presented a challenge. Maybe by stating that she was totally uninterested in finding a husband, shed aroused a need in him to prove her wrong. He hoped to hell that wasnt true. He took the subject of marriage too seriously to make it into a game.
Not that it mattered now. She probably thought he was a nutcase after hed blown out of there without an explanation. But he couldnt exactly blurt out that hed needed some space to analyze his strong reaction to her.
And he definitely hadnt been willing to tell her his other, more practical reason for leaving.
Their discussion about sex had been going in one directiontoward the bedroom. If Beth asked him to stay the night, he wanted to be able to say yes, and that meant being prepared.
He could be wrong. She might not ask himbut then again, he had been sent over by Jillian Vickers. Jillian knew him pretty well, and her matchmaking efforts were uncannily on target, so chances were, she knew Beth pretty well, too.
Then he remembered the sociology experiment that Ken and Jillian had going on and groaned. Of course. He and Beth were part of the study. Now, there was a spooky thought. Was everything he was feeling just the cabin mojo screwing with his mind?
No. Hed rather believe in love at first sight than magic cabins. Ken and Jillian were convinced the cabin had saved their marriage, but Mac thought it more likely that all theyd needed was a secluded spot to concentrate on each other. They could have been in the middle of the Sahara or on top of Mount Rushmore.
And their renters were discovering romance in the cabin for the same reasonit created a sense of intimacy.
But that didnt explain his mind-set. Hed spent time with women in similar cabins, including his own, and never felt this urgent compulsion to bond.
Still, the Vickers cabin was a charmer. Whoever had designed it originally had made the front half open and cheery, with the living room and kitchen blending into each other, and the back half cozy andyesromantic, with only one bedroom and one bath opening off it.
The king-size bed was massive and rustic. Jillian had found a bedspread made out of soft velour. Mac had run his hand over it once and it felt incredible. For the bathroom, Ken had located an oversize claw-foot tub and Mac had installed it as an anniversary present.
Considering the amenities, not to mention the hot tub on the back porch, Mac could easily see why couples left feeling more loving toward each other than when theyd arrived. Hed mention all that when he explained the experiment to Beth. She deserved to know that they were guinea pigs.
For now, though, he should head over there before she wondered if hed run off into a ditch. Leaving the engine running, he navigated around the snowdrifts on his front porch and unlocked the front door. Once inside, he walked quickly to the bathroom and took the box of condoms from the cabinet under the sink. He tucked them into his coat pocket and started to leave.
He was nearly out the door when he realized that hed have to return with something else that would justify his trip home. Arriving at her front door with a box of condoms in hand was just not classy.
So what to take back to her? Wine would be greatif he had any, which he didnt. A six-pack of beer wouldnt work if she favored wine. His fruit bowl on the counter held two overripe bananas. They needed to be eaten, but showing up with a couple of brownish bananas didnt strike the right note.
His refrigerator wasnt much help. It contained half a loaf of wheat bread, six eggs, an open quart of milk, some leftover microwave lasagna and the beer. Hed deliberately let his food supplies dwindle because his mother always loaded him up with leftovers.
He didnt have much in his cupboardscrackers that were probably stale by now, a few cans of soup, a can of regular coffee and some boxed macaroni and cheese. None of that cried out Hostess Gift. Instead it cried out Bachelor Who Doesnt Cook.
He considered making up some story that hed left his TV or his coffeepot on. But then he could have just said that as he was leaving her place. Instead, hed dashed out as if his tail was on fire.
Turning on a light in his small living room, he glanced around. Reading material? That would be lame, as if he had to bring along his own entertainment. And then he spied his stack of board games.
She might not care for board games, but he did. He took the combination checkers/chess set and Sorry!, one of his favorites because it wasnt rocket science. She might think he was a dork for disappearing abruptly and then returning with board games, but hed brave it out.
The return trip was hairy, and he almost skidded off the pavement twice. Not many vehicles were on the road, which was lucky because at times he needed to go smack down the middle of it. He could see the lights of snowplows down on the main highway, but they wouldnt get up here tonight.
That meant he could be snowed in all night with Beth, whether they wanted to be that cozy or not. If hed guessed wrong about her interest in him, he could always take the couch. Maybe he wouldnt have to tell his mother a little white lie about road conditions, after all.
As he pulled up in front of the Vickers cabin, he decided to make that call to his mother before he forgot. Particularly since forgetting was a distinct possibility once he focused on Beth. He got his mother on the first ring.
Conneach, Ive been thinking about you. Hows the weather up your way?
Thats why Im calling, Mom. Its blizzard conditions. I doubt seriously Ill be able to get out of here tomorrow.
Oh, Conneach. What a disappointment.
Guilt stabbed him, but he wasnt going to back down after proclaiming to Beth that he was joining her for a feast of independence. Im disappointed, too, but I know you dont want me on the road if its dangerous.
No, of course I dont. If anything changes, come on, anyway. Well have plenty of food.
I know, but dont count on me.
We could postpone until the next day. Your dads closing the office on Friday, which means Stephanie will be off, too.
Mac hoped he wouldnt go to hell for lying to his mother. He couldnt very well tell her hed met the woman of his dreams, even if that turned out to be the truth. I promised a customer Id install some new bathroom lighting on Friday, Mom. Sorry about that.
Then Ill package up the leftovers and keep them until you can make it down here. Whats your food situation? Will you have enough to eat?
Ill be fine. The casinos will be open, dont forget. I can walk there if I have to.
All right. Well miss you, but you can meet Stephanie another time. Call if you get the chance, but if I dont talk to you, Happy Thanksgiving.
Same to you, Mom. He disconnected the call, picked up the board games and opened his door.
A jolt of happiness hit him at the thought of seeing Beth again. It seemed like ages since hed left.
WHEN BETH HEARD MACS TRUCK pull up, she took the pizza out of the oven, found a pizza cutter and shoved it through the slightly hardened crust. The pizza was a little dried out and not terribly hot, but his trip had taken way longer than shed expected. She was curious about what hed gone after in such a hurry, and she hoped hed say.
But if he didnt, she resolved not to pry. After all, theyd just met. She couldnt expect him to lay bare all his secrets right off the bat.
Once she had the pizza cut, she stoked the fire, thinking hed knock on the door any second. When he didnt, she wondered what was keeping him, but shed be damned if shed go to the window and peer out. She stuck the pizza pan back in the oven and poked at the fire some more.