After her fright, she had pulled on the dogs chain and placed him between us, to defend her. She made a gesture with a shrug of her shoulders to show that she hadnt understood me, which made me realize that I had spoken to her in Spanish.
I immediately said the same thing in Italian, and when she heard it, smiling, she extended her arm and pointed to a place for me. I looked toward the place she had indicated and saw that the curtains were being drawn at that moment. Yes, that must have been the place where I had heard them raising the shutter earlier, I had no doubt. I thanked her and headed over there with long strides.
I pushed on that glass door and looking over near the windows, I saw that a waiter was finishing drawing the curtains, he still had the cord in his hands.
Buongiorno, can you give me something to eat? I asked immediately, trying to pronounce it properly and in a way that he would understand me. He didnt react as that girl had just a moment ago.
Looking at me in surprise, he replied:
We dont have anything at all. This is a coffee shop, there is no food, were only just opening, he told me in Italian of course, but speaking slowly. It was clear that he was used to talking to strangers, perhaps visitors from other countries, because he understood very well.
As I sat there at a table, I said:
Whatever you have, cake, bread with butter or coffee with some cookies, whatever you want, but surely you have something in there that could placate my stomach, and I put my hand on my stomach to make it clearer.
He didnt seem to understand me as well that time, even though I had taken a lot of care when I said it, but turning around and without saying anything, he went into what I assumed must be the kitchen, and immediately came back out with a plate full of pastries.
My eyes widened when I saw that treat. Given my sweet tooth and the hunger I felt, surely I wouldnt leave a single one.
I held back, but as soon as he left it on the table, I thanked him and took the first one, I wasnt going to be fussy.
I reached out for the biggest one, which was decorated, it was covered in chocolate. I could not believe how lucky I was while I took my first bite. Food finally, I told myself.
I was like a little kid, but I was already feeling very faint, so I said to myself, Why should I wait before I have more? and when Id finished with that one, I took another.
I was starting to eat that one when the waiter approached me. He was holding a cup of steaming hot coffee in his hand, which smelled Aaah! It smelled so good! How wonderful! That made me forget all my aches and pains.
<<<<< >>>>>
Ever since my student days, coffee has been my drug of choice. Ive never even considered trying any others, even though certain companions have invited me to on occasion, I have always been clear, no drugs. They bring a lot of problems, but I had never been able to resist coffee.
Of course I picked up the habit at home, with the coffee my mother made. Ive never had any quite like it, and of course I dare say, knowing how much mothers love their children, none would consider giving their kids a substandard version of something.
Therefore, if she made me that delicious coffee every morning, well, it was sure to be a decent brew, not that she would give me a lot. Whenever she poured it for me, I would ask her for one more little splash, and she would top me up with a few more drops on top of what she had already given me, saying:
Thats enough to keep you alert.
Thats how I gradually fell in love with coffee and Ive never gotten out of the habit. Its not that I abuse it, but its true that I prefer it to anything else.
A warm sip of that coffee that the waiter had given me made me recall that now long ago day and that decision I had made. I had to learn everything I could about those three children, and about what really happened.
Surely theyll all be stories whipped up by priests. They were Portuguese and when communism was introduced there, someone very smart must have said, Lets fight it, and the plan was surprising at best, they would have to have had a lot of resources to implement it.
Because of what little information Id been able to glean so far, led by my curiosity, there were people who really believed it, even that the sun had danced, what nonsense! How far did superstition go? How can you be deceived like this and believe that nonsense?
But I was ready and willing to discover the deception. I had no idea how difficult that would be, but I had nothing better to do. I would devote myself to it for as long as necessary, because when I set out to do something, I go all in to reach my goal.
On top of that, I had read something about the subject of Fatima, to try to understand The Documents, which I had hidden well. It was not until my first vacation, when I had more free time, that I thought I would devote a little time to that topic, to see what I could find out.
Im going to Portugal for a few days, I told my family.
Son, when did you make that decision? Why so suddenly? Has something happened that you dont want to tell us about? asked my surprised mother.
Mom, Im older now, I replied with affection, its high time I made a move and learn something for myself.
No, its not that I object, but tell me, what part of Portugal will you go to? she asked in a worried tone.
I think Ill go to Fatima, I said, lowering my voice.
Whaaat? said Carmen, to Fatima? Did I just hear you properly? What business do you have going to Fatima?
Well, to Lisbon, I adjusted quickly.
I thought I heard you say you were going to Fatima, she said with a smile. Will it not be to pray, to get rid of those weird ideas in your head?
What are you talking about? I asked seriously. We all have the freedom to believe in whatever we want.
My father, who certainly had an opinion on a matter like that, even if it was not the same as mine, intervened and said:
Yes Manu, believe, if you can, in whatever you want, in something thats not right and which I think even goes against nature. I didnt know then what it meant, to not believe, to question everything and to have such absurd ideas, but how can there not be a God who created us, who created everything? Thats impossible.
Dad, I said, lets drop the subject, weve already discussed many times. You have your ideas, and I have mine, and I dont think Im hurting anyone thinking the way I do, and Mom, rest assured that Ill be careful and nothing bad is gonna happen to me, I said when I saw how her expression had changed when that topic of conversation had come up.
My mother, who didnt want to talk about it either, said:
Do you know that the twins have written?
Really? And what did they say? Carmen asked very quickly, because she wanted to move away from the subject too.
Well, that theyre doing very well at camp, that they swim a lot and that theyre training for a competition. They both say theyll win.
Well, as always, said my father, interrupting her, theyll have to give the trophy to both of them and theyll have to share it. In reality that wont be difficult because they sleep in the same room.
Well, I wonder, said Chelito, why dont they each focus on something different?
Well, I wonder, said Chelito, why dont they each focus on something different?
But darling, said Mom, thats impossible, they always have to do everything together.
No, I know that they were born together, but at some point theyll have to realize that they have to do things separately, otherwise when they get older, will they also marry the same woman? I think that with that condition, no one will want them.
Laughing at the remark, we finished the meal, but after having been in my room for a little while, I heard some tapping on the door. I was surprised because I hadnt heard any footsteps in the hall.
Yeees? I said.
Can I have a moment? I heard quietly.
Sure, I answered. Come in, come in, what do you want?
Opening the door just a little, Carmen slipped inside:
You dont fool me you know. What are you looking for in a place like Fatima? she asked, and then she said, Look me in the eye and answer me, are you questioning something about religion at this point? You can count on me brother, you know that, right?
No! I said in a serious tone. It seemed to just come out of me and I raised my voice a little.
Alright, dont be like that, dont get angry, just acknowledge that what you said is very strange, that the one time you go on your own vacation, youve chosen to go there, she told me.
Well, its not the first time Im leaving home on my own. Besides, what do you care where Im going?
Why wouldnt I care? Im your big sister and I know its not the first time to see you doing something on your own. I already know that, but the other times were different, you got up to those high jinks over your summer breaks, to help out in your own way, as you put it when you didnt want to give us any further explanation.
Whats wrong? Can I not do what I want now? Didnt I go to Paris? I said a little nervously.
Yes, she answered immediately, Paris, you were so lucky! I remember it well, but you werent alone, I think you were four, right? I think its great that youre going where you want, I just wanted to know why this time was different, it just surprised me, thats all.
Not wanting to give her any more information, I said:
Go on, leave me be, I have to study. Ive got a final exam tomorrow and its gonna be pretty hard.
Alright, but when you come back from your trip, you have to tell me what youve seen, okay?
Okay, I said so she would drop the subject, and saying goodbye, she left the room.
I looked at the closet. Fortunately, no one knew what I had hidden there. They would have asked me so many questions if they did. I wouldve had to give them so many explanations, and say to them, Please dont tell anyone, so many times.
It was better this way, with only me knowing. I would share it with them some day, when I was clear on the matter, when I had discovered the reasons why that person had hidden it in that place.
<<<<< >>>>>
On my second day of being in Fatima, a very strange impulse within me compelled me to head to a solitary place. I let myself be carried away. For some time, I had stopped wondering about certain things that happened to me, and my curiosity made me follow those impulses. I knew that what happened next was not by chance, because Ive never believed in coincidences.
I walked slowly, as if I were waiting for something, but waiting for what? I didnt know anyone there. I had only arrived yesterday, and nobody knew that I was there, because I hadnt told any of my family the specific place where I was going to stay.
Surely they thought I would be staying in Lisbon and that was also what I had thought at first, but when I arrived here at Fatima and after driving around a little to take a look at the place, I saw that sign that said, Quartos, or Rooms, so I stopped the car and got out. I had to ask if there were any free rooms to spend the night. A man was standing there at the door to the place and approaching him, I asked about it.
Yes son, there are still some left, theyre not exactly banging my door down, this place only fills up on special occasions, and now it seems that the weather isnt bringing much business with it, he answered before entering the building.
I turned around to properly park and lock the car, then I went back to the entrance and saw the man talking to a woman. They both looked over at me as I came in through the door, and the man left to go into another room, closing the door behind him as he went.
After greeting me, the lady asked me if I would stay that night. At that moment I was confused and answered:
I dont know!
Opening her eyes wide, she said:
Do you no longer want the room? What happened?
No, yes, I want it, but I dont know if its only for one night or if Ill stay for longer, I answered.
Ah, alright, dont worry about that, stay as long as you want, and she gave me a key. Look at this one, its bigger than the others and youll get a better sleep, she said putting a smile on her face.
Can you tell that Im tired? I asked.
Well, getting a little sleep is good for us all. Ill prepare something for your dinner, you must be hungry, and itll do you some good to have eaten a little something before going to bed, the woman was telling me with such confidence, as if she were a relative, even though we had only met just a few moments ago.
Yes, I said, Ive been driving for a long time, I didnt want to arrive too late and find everything closed around here.
Alright, well, everything will be ready in half an hour, she told me, Im running off to make it now.
I went to the car, because I just remembered that in the rush, I hadnt taken my luggage, and I took out a bag that I had prepared, with some clothes and shaving stuff. Although I didnt really have much of a beard, one of my friends had told me that if I shaved every day, it would grow quicker and come in more, and I wanted to have a beard.
Whats more, I was determined that when it grew in properly, I would leave it, that would certainly give me a more serious look, because I was tired of everyone telling me I had a baby face. That made me mad, I at least wanted to look my age.
I went up to the room. Upon entering, I looked around to take it all in. It was a simple room, but everything was very clean, I liked it, I was sure I would get a good rest there.
I tossed the bag onto the bed, then I thought better of it and picked it back up, putting it on the table and I lay on the bed to stretch my body a little. I spent a little while there before going downstairs for dinner.
What she had prepared for me smelled so good! It was a vegetable soup, something indescribable. There were vegetables of all colors, but the taste was incredible!
I had to ask her how she had done it. I wanted to tell my mother so she could make it for me. I complimented her for it and she stared at me. At first I thought she hadnt understood me correctly, but immediately putting on a broad smiling, she said:
Son, its just a handful of vegetables from the garden, boiled in some water, and smiling, she walked away saying: That poor boy was so hungry, it looks like he hasnt eaten all day.
When I heard her, I thought she was referring to how quickly I had eaten it, right to the last spoonful of that course that had tasted so good.