And if Rachel was around, they tended to behave better toward Maybe as well. They might actually get through dinner and have a decent time.
Rachels laugh sounded rusty, but genuine. True. Youre a champion thwarter. But youd cut them off totally and wouldnt be in contact if not for me.
She scoffed. Pretty much, yeah. Well, if you and I werent living here, Id probably still be in Spokane, happily existing two states away from them. Yes. Thats true. Look, they came up here to be near you. Theyre not always awful. Just most of the time. They worry about you.
Its all the times they are awful to you I have a problem with.
Her sister had no idea the true extent of damage between their parents and Maybe. Shed seen enough to feel the way she did, to understand why Maybe had run away and gotten herself a new life and kept her parents away from it.
Maybe saw no reason to get into specifics and make Rachel feel bad. She couldnt have changed it, or stopped it, so it would have only made her feel guilty. Maybe kept her childhood in a box marked Past and thats where she wanted it to stay.
Look, she told Rachel, nothing is perfect. But you and me? Were a team. So until youre ready to handle this, Ive got it. And even when you are, Ill still be at your side. Shes a good cook. Turkey day isnt that bad if we go shortly before dinner and leave right after.
Her mother would frown at them not helping in the kitchen. But shed just tell Maybe she was doing everything wrong anyway. The kitchen and her garden were the only places totally under their moms complete control. Their dad ran everything else.
It was one of the few things Maybe missed about living in Spokane. At least then they didnt really expect her to come to Thanksgiving. Once shed left their house and moved in with her aunt and uncle, her parents generally found it unnecessary to deal with her unless they had to.
She made her own domain. On her terms with the guidance and love of her aunt and uncle. It had transformed her life, made her realize her worth in a way she hadnt growing up.
But after Rachel and Maybe had settled in Seattle instead of Rachel moving back to Los Angeles where theyd been from, their parents had sold their house and moved up to the Northwest, and their ugly, dark need to control came back into her life again.
It made her harder, it made her stronger and in the end, if she didnt view it like that, it would have eaten her alive.
Well go, but we only stay on our terms. Rachels voice had gone cold and hard. A glimpse of the woman shed been and was working her way toward once more. Following the rules was one thing, but Rachel had never been one to get manipulated or maneuvered into anywhere other than where she planned on going.
Rachel took her hands, squeezing them a moment. What was on that meme you sent me the other day? Oh yeah, Do No Harm, But Take No Shit. I think I need that on a cross-stitch to hang over my damn bed. Anyway. Its time I start pushing back harder about what I want and for them to get off your case.
Its cool to want to be comfortable and safe and drama free except for the dumb crap at the shop or whatever. Maybe kept her voice calm. Rachel hated pity and she was always careful to bury it far out of her sisters way.
I know what it costs you to run interference with them.
Youre going to make me cry so stop this now, Maybe warned.
Thank you. Rachel said this with utter seriousness. I needed it and now I need to stand on my own more often. Especially with them.
Ill call them back to let them know and get the details.
Ill do it. Dont argue. Rachel gave her the stink-eye. Its my turn. And I can gauge how strong their when will you get serious and find a real job and stop consorting with those people game is.
Good luck with that. Theyre world champions and youve fallen in with your shiftless sister and her loser friends.
It doesnt matter what they think. I know you. Rachel waved a hand, but her face was serious.
Its cool. I can use it in my art and shit.
Rachel saw through the bravado, but she let it go with a smile. Pain is prose, baby. And it pays the bills. Barely, but Im okay with that for now. Ive got this and Im not arguing about it another moment.
Maybe shrugged and held her hands up. Okay then. Call in an airstrike if you need it. You know where I am.
CHAPTER FOUR
EARLY THE NEXT AFTERNOON, Maybe headed to have her regular Friday lunch with her best friend Cora and Rachel at the tiny deli just a few doors down from the tattoo shop where they both worked.
Rachel had been up and out first thing that morning. She still had regular doctor and therapy appointments, though the frequency had dwindled and would continue in that direction.
But she was there, along with Cora, at a small table where a bottle of soda already waited for her.
Cora Silvera had been Maybes best friend pretty much from the first day shed shown up at Whiskey Sharp and stopped by this same little deli for a soda before she went to work. Cora had grabbed the last orange fizz, but when shed taken note of Maybes disappointment, shed handed it over with a smile.
Then, it turned out she worked at Ink Sisters with Rachel and was related to Rachels mentor and new boss. In the next months shed ended up being besties with both Dolan sisters.
Youre my favorite, Maybe said as she sat and took a swig of orange fizz.
Of course I am. Why do you look so sexy today? Cora asked. Snug shirt to showcase the knockers. Red lipstick. The way your hair is standing up extra high. Are those streaks new?
Okay, so at eleven last night after telling Rachel the story of my date and talking about my undeniable thing for my hot boss, I decided to add them because I figured I finally need to see what it could be between me and him.
Well, I think the silver really pops against the red and I love it. Im glad you had a shitty date so you finally allowed yourself to jump on Alexseis bones.
Penises dont have bones, Maybe deadpanned.
Cora giggled and Rachel just shook her head with a grin. Youre a woman of loose morals, Maybe Dolan. By the way you look ridiculously hot and Im thrilled you finally found a way to get around the whole hes-my-boss thing. If you date a bit, have some sex and its meh, you two arent going to flip out. Youll still be friends and coworkers. But I dont know, he seems to look at you...really look at you. He watches the way you move. You have the hots for him too. So why not see where it goes because it could be something super delicious and hot? And to be honest, Rachel and I have decided we need to have sex with him vicariously.
Maybe snickered. I should never leave the two of you alone to talk about me.
This is totally true. Rachel winked. Too late though.
They made some plans to meet up later and, buoyed by Coras opinion, Maybe bounced into Whiskey Sharpafter brushing her teeth and reapplying her lipstickwith a few minutes to spare before her first appointment.
* * *
ALEXSEI PRETENDED HE didnt realize how often he found himself looking up at the door. She liked to work the late afternoon into evening several nights a week to couple her schedule to take advantage of the happy-hour-booze-and-a-haircut specials at the bar, which opened and began serving at four in the afternoon.
Smart.
She knew her clientele. Knew they enjoyed a drink after they left their jobs in the offices crammed downtown. It had been her idea to do the happy hour shave and drink specials they were now famous for.
He liked to see Maybe in the afternoons. Liked the way the sunlight would hit her while she worked. Essentially, he liked seeing her whenever she was around.
It was thinking of her that had gotten him through what had been a truly monstrously awkward late breakfast with his mother and aunt. Thered been posturing, as always, between the two sisters. Lots of passive-aggressive commentary. He and Cris had eaten and tried to talk around all the tension.
He frowned, thinking of it all over again, but this time when he looked up from his work, there she was standing in the doorway, always pausing just a moment as she came in like she greeted the walls and floors as much as everyone else.
Another thing that got to him. She seemed to love the physical space as much as he did.
She looked extra...that is, very whatever it was she exuded when she wore those pants. Maybe was a jumble of old and new in all the best ways. Hard and soft. She looked feminine and fierce and it set his heart pounding.
Afternoon, class.
Why he loved it so much when she was ridiculous and irreverent he wasnt sure. But it was true anyway.
She glided around the shop, taking her coat off, touching base with their office manager and the other barbers until she stood at his station, a hand on her hip.
I have no treats for you today. Sorry, she told him with a pretty smile.
She was his treat. One hed decided to let himself enjoy.
We had a family breakfast so Irishka was with me instead of loading you down with food. Shed mentioned Maybe in front of his mother several times. Alexsei was pretty certain it was her way of encouraging him toward Maybe and probably also rubbing it in that she was able to give him advice on something his mother hadnt known about until right then.
He expected to hear all about that at some point from his mother, whod hoard it until she needed it as ammunition to lob at him.
Alexsei had, for long moments, wanted to tell her, wanted to share with her this delicious new thing hed planned to pursue. It had been right there on the tip of his tongue but then hed realized he didnt know if he could trust his mother the way he did his aunt. Which made him sad, but he had only so much time for sadness.
I love it that you call her Irishka. Its very sweet. I havent had bread from a grocery store in years. Im not sure I could go back now. How is your mothers visit so far? Maybe headed to her chair and began to set up.
Fine. Shed been annoyed to have to go to breakfast so early. If you could call 10:00 a.m. early and his aunt most assuredly did not. And his mother had insisted on a hotel downtown so theyd gone to meet her there where some sort of bizarre one-upmanship had begun between the sisters.
How long is she here for? Maybe asked.
Three days. She needs to get back because my youngest sister has something, an event of some sort in Moscow. Shell be there on a school holiday.
Thats right. You have two little sisters.
He nodded.
Too bad theyre not with her on this visit. This is one of those Seattle Novembers all the tourism guides will be using to sell vacations here for years.
Alexsei didnt know his sisters very well, though he and his brother certainly wished they did. They were far youngerfifteen and sixteen yearsand products of his mother securing her place at the side of her third husband, who happened to be a gangster as well as a vulgar asshole.
Have you given your mom a tour of Whiskey Sharp? I cant recall ever meeting her in the time Ive worked here. I bet she was so proud when you did.
In the sixteen years since he and Cristian had arrived at SeaTac to move in with his aunt and uncle, their mother had visited six times. The last time shed been in town, four years before, hed driven her over, so proud to show off this business hed begun to build.
She hadnt bothered to do more than glance through the front window, comment on the neighborhood and get back into the car after telling him she hoped he had good insurance or could she give him a loan for a better location.
All he said was Shes seen it.
The understanding on Maybes face might have made him uncomfortable a year ago and it certainly did right then. Only in a way that was new. More intimate, therefore a lot more terrifying.
That was, he thought, what being with her would be like. She saw straight to the heart of things and of people. An attractive quality, but a fearsome one too.
Maybes client came in and she waved him her way, their conversation done for the time being, but she gave Alexsei a look over her shoulder that told him she saw through his bullshit.
And though shed asked him more questions than usual, shed understood he didnt want to say more and didnt push.
She didnt have to really because he couldnt stop thinking about her. She worked efficiently as always, flirting and laughing with her clients. As the afternoon stretched into evening, Whiskey Sharp filled up with people drinking and getting shaves and haircuts. The sound level rose but it never got so raucous he was worried.
In fact, he used it to hide behind as the time for him to leave for dinner at his aunt and uncles house approached.
Slower than usual, he cleaned his workspace and his tools as the light wisped into full dark.
So.
Startled, Alexsei focused on Maybe, who stood so close he could smell her. Today it was what he liked to think of as her autumn scent. Hed never say that aloud, naturally, but she changed up her products over the course of the year. In the summer she smelled of heady, luscious flowers and sometimes of coconut and mango. Autumn she was always spicy and rich.
Hello? she asked, getting his attention back from where hed been imagining leaning in and taking a sniff.
I apologize, he told her. Why was she so close? He had no ability to be in a space where she was like that because it shredded the control he normally used to keep himself firmly in the friend category.
His breath was full of her. Of her scent. Her heat. The soft sound of her breath was suddenly the only thing he heard.
If he dodged, just a step in either direction, hed put himself firmly back into that friend spot. He knew it to his bones that shed assume he wasnt interested and move on.
Instead he opened the door to more-than-friends. Hed decided to wait until his mother was gone to make his move, but he had no plans to resist now that the opportunity presented itself. Is there something you need to tell me? he asked.
She stepped even closer to speak in his ear. Ive been waiting for you to ask me out for drinks or something and you havent. And I want to go out for drinks or something with you so Im going to move this along and do the asking because, God, you take forever to get to the point.
Startled, he laughed, pulling her into a quick hug.
He shouldnt have, because she felt so fucking good he got dizzy with it. And then he didnt want to let go but itd already gone into a little too long for friendly territory so he released her.
Maybe stepped back and the way she looked struck him in the gut. Eyes heavy lidded, a carnal smile on a mouth he wanted to kiss so badly the only thing stopping him was the crowded bar full of their friends and coworkers.