The discovery of who his real father was had come as just as big a shock to Jude. It had taken them both months to even begin to get used to the idea.
I seriously wish we didnt have to do this, Jude said again, looking up at the old beech tree. Is it such a problem? Couldnt we just leave it?
Ben pointed up at the thick, leafless dead branch that overhung the glass roof of the nearby summer house. We could just leave it, he said. But come the next high wind, that branch is going to break off and crash straight through that roof. You dont want anyone to be underneath it when it happens. Or to have to fork out for the glaziers bill even if no one is.
At that moment Scruffy, a wiry-haired terrier of uncertain breed whod once belonged to the Arundels and now had been more or less adopted by Ben and his fiancée Brooke, burst out of the bushes in pursuit of a darting squirrel. The dog raced across the unmown lawn, ploughed destructively through some roses and disappeared at full pelt into the shrubs on the far side.
Jude rolled his eyes in exasperation at the dogs antics, then turned back to the tree and shrugged. Then it looks like we dont have much choice.
Ben had found all he needed for the job in Simeons woodshed behind the house. He grabbed the coil of rope, propped the ladder against the tree and shinnied up twenty feet to the level of the branch. Hanging precariously off the side of the ladder as Jude stabilised the bottom, he looped the rope around the branchs gnarly tip. Once he was confident that it was securely attached to the sound limb above it, he climbed back down and picked up the chainsaw. Now for the fun part, he muttered.
Arent you supposed to wear protective clothing to handle one of those things? Jude asked, frowning.
Yup, Ben said. He primed the carb, applied just enough choke.
So arent you going to wear any?
Nope.
Youre a mad bastard, you know that?
So people keep telling me. Ben yanked the start cord. The noisy snorting buzz of the two-stroke engine shattered the serenity of the morning.
It took some time to remove the large branch in sections, each one carefully secured by the rope so that it didnt plunge through the glass roof and defeat the purpose of the whole delicate operation. Eventually, all that remained of the offending branch was a pile of pieces on the ground and a big raw circle on the side of the tree.
I hate to see it mutilated like that, Jude said when Ben had come down and killed the chainsaw engine. This was Dads favourite tree. Told me about how he used to climb right up it when he was a kid Jude suddenly went quiet.
Ben could see the discomfort in his expression, more than just sadness. He laid a hand on Judes shoulder. Its okay, you can call him Dad. Weve talked about this. Thats how you knew him, all your life.
Except that he wasnt, Jude said glumly.
Maybe, but he was still a better father to you than I wouldve been, Ben replied. Even though he was being completely sincere, his words seemed surreal to him. The truth was still hard to accept after six months. It weighed heavily on his mind that he hadnt yet drummed up the courage to reveal to Brooke the real identity of the young man she thought was just the son of a close friend. He wanted to tell her, but the right time he kept waiting for just never seemed to materialise.
Anyway, its a shame, Jude said, changing the subject and gazing wistfully up at the tree, shielding his eyes from the bright sun.
If its any consolation to your green sensibilities, once its seasoned thatll make for pretty good firewood, Ben said with a smile. Carbon neutral fuel, negligible environmental impact. Lets gather it up and stick it in the woodshed.
Once that warm work was taken care of, it was midday and they were both ready for one of the beers that Jude had chilling to wash down a ham sandwich or two. In the airy cool of the kitchen they slouched on chairs at the long pine table, munched and sipped from their bottles. Ben was quiet, as he often was these days, deep in thought. Jude wasnt the only one whose situation had changed in a big way over the last few months. Sometimes, when Ben thought about the radical steps hed taken towards a completely new direction in life, it made his heart thump.
Are you nervous about it? Jude asked suddenly, as if hed been able to read Bens thoughts.
Ben took out his pack of Gauloises cigarettes and Zippo lighter, and lit up as he considered the question. Nervous about which bit? Getting married in three days time? Or giving up my whole career and business and going back to college yet again, to study along with a bunch of kids half my age?
Hey, Im half your age, and we get on okay, Jude laughed. Anyway, I wasnt talking about you taking up your Theology course again after all this time, wanting to become a vicar and all that. No problems there. Youd be great in the Church.
Your mother once told me the same thing, Ben said, with a trace of doubt showing in his voice.
I meant the wedding, Jude said. Thats the part thatd scare the shit out of me.
Ben had to admit he felt pretty much the same way. Marrying his beautiful soulmate Brooke Marcel was the most exciting and wonderful thing that had happened to him in a very long time and thered been a time, not so long ago, when he hadnt been sure whether shed ever speak to him again, or whether hed even see her again. But the wedding plans werent exactly what hed had in mind when hed proposed to her in a remote Peruvian rainforest village back in February.
If it was up to me and Brooke, he sighed, watching a curl of blue Gauloise smoke curl and drift in the sunlight from the window, wed have the quietest wedding ever. No messing around, no fuss: get in there, sign the papers, and get out again.
Jude chuckled. And then Phoebe came along.
Yeah, and then Phoebe came along, Ben said. Brookes elder sister was married to a blustering overpaid idiot of a City banker called Marshall Kite, whom shed persuaded in her interfering way to foot the bill for turning what should have been a small, private ceremony into an overblown great extravaganza. Christ Church Cathedral in Oxford was booked for the lavish wedding itself, the reception was due to take place in the countys most flamboyantly expensive country hotel, and the last time Ben had dared to check the swelling list of guests and assorted bridesmaids and other apparently indispensible personnel, it had seemed to him that half the worlds population would be in attendance. Jeff Dekker, whod been second-in-command at the Le Val Tactical Training Centre in Normandy before Ben had passed the business over to him, was going to be best man. Ben fully expected the ex-SBS commando to laugh his pants off when he saw the ludicrous scale of the affair.
In fact, the only part of the whole silly circus Ben was looking forward to with any pleasure was that hed have a rare chance to see his sister Ruth, who was flying in later today from Switzerland in plenty of time for the full-dress wedding rehearsal that Phoebe had arranged just to make sure. The rehearsal was scheduled for 2 p.m. tomorrow, exactly forty-eight hours before the big show. Ben was as steeled for it as he could be.
Ben? Jude said.
What? Ben smiled absently.
I appreciate your coming over to help me out.
In fact, the only part of the whole silly circus Ben was looking forward to with any pleasure was that hed have a rare chance to see his sister Ruth, who was flying in later today from Switzerland in plenty of time for the full-dress wedding rehearsal that Phoebe had arranged just to make sure. The rehearsal was scheduled for 2 p.m. tomorrow, exactly forty-eight hours before the big show. Ben was as steeled for it as he could be.
Ben? Jude said.
What? Ben smiled absently.
I appreciate your coming over to help me out.
Least I can do. I know the last few months have been tough. Ben looked at his watch. Brooke said she might be coming over sometime after lunch, he said. Shed rushed off to London first thing that morning to hand over the keys of her old Richmond flat to her landlord and arrange for the last of her things to be delivered to the rented house in Oxfords Jericho district where she and Ben would be living while he finished his studies.
Right now, the house was in complete disorder. Ben had never realised that Brooke had so much stuff. On top of that were all the wedding gifts that had already started arriving: such as the one from Winnie. Shed been a faithful housekeeper to the Hope family for many years. After Bens parents had died, shed moved with him to the remote coastal house in Ireland and tried to mother him as best she could, usually to little avail. When Ben had started up the Le Val Tactical Training Centre in Normandy, rather than move with him to France Winnie had chosen to return to her home county of Lancashire and live with her elder cousin Elspeth. Winnie obviously believed that Ben had reached the age of forty without a knife, fork or plate to his name: the kitchen in Jericho was now filled with a sprawling great dinner service that could cover a banquet table.
Then there were the piled-up cases of wine and whisky from Bens old SAS comrade, Boonzie McCulloch, who now lived in Italy with his fiery Neapolitan wife, Mirella. The gift from Commander Darcey Kane of the National Crime Agency had come with a card bearing the message Bastard! Love, D. When Ben had opened the oblong box hed found a deluxe .308 rifle cleaning kit inside. Darcey was thoughtful like that. Except that Ben didnt happen to possess a rifle. Not any more. At this juncture in his life he didnt expect to have to see one, most of all hear one, ever again.
Itll be good to catch up with Brooke, Jude said. I like her a lot.
Im glad the two of you get on so well.
Oh I just remembered. Ive got something for you.
There was no need for you to get us a present, Ben protested, hoping it would be nothing too large, and that Jude hadnt spent too much of his limited funds on it.
I didnt. Its not, I mean, its what the hell. Jude drained his beer and got up. Come and Ill show you.
Ben stubbed out his cigarette and followed Jude upstairs to the large, airy bedroom that had once belonged to Simeon and Michaela. He felt a chill as he walked in. He still remembered the awful night theyd died, in that accident which had been anything but.
There, Jude said, pointing at a row of clothing neatly laid out on the bed.
Ben looked. These were Simeons.
Jude nodded. His vicar uniform. Or whatever youre meant to call it.
Ben sadly ran his fingers over the clothes. The black clerical shirt, fitted with its Roman collar, lay folded on top of a pair of sharply-creased matching trousers. Next to it was the long black cassock, then the white linen surplice that Simeon would have put on to conduct morning and evening services.
He was about your size, Jude said. I reckon theyd fit you. When you get ordained one day, Id like you to wear them. Hed have wanted it too.
Ben wasnt comfortable with the idea. But as he was on the verge of saying no, he saw the look on Judes face and bit his tongue. Thank you, Jude. Its a very kind thought.
Then youll wear them?
Ill wear them. I promise.
There was a silence. Then Jude said, So are you going to try them on, or what?
Now?
Jude grinned. While youre doing that, Im going to go put the chainsaw and stuff away.
Left alone in his old friends bedroom, Ben spent a few moments gazing sadly at the clothes. He thought about the man Simeon Arundel had been. Thought about himself, and how much he had to live up to. Through the open window he could hear Jude knocking about in the woodshed and the dog barking excitedly at something.
Fuck it, Ben murmured to himself. Reluctantly, hesitantly, he pulled off his jeans and put on the black trousers, then stripped off his T-shirt and buttoned up the black clerical one. Jude had been right about the fit. Even the shiny patent leather shoes could have been made for him.
Ben stared at his reflection in the full-length mirror by the wardrobe. An Anglican vicars garb was one uniform hed never seen himself wearing before, and to his self-conscious eye he cut an unlikely figure in it.
Reverend Benedict Hope. Could it ever really happen? Hed never turned away from a challenge in his life, but this might just be one of the hardest hed ever faced. Maybe even harder than the hellish endurance test of qualifying for entry into 22 SAS.
Feeling self-conscious, he was about to start changing back into his own clothes when he heard the front doorbell chime in the hallway downstairs, then again, and again. Who could that be? Brooke, so soon? She wouldnt ring the bell over and over like that, so insistently.
Ben swore under his breath. He put his head out of the window and called, Jude! Are you going to get that? But Jude was now too busy throwing sticks in the garden for Scruffy to take any notice.
Ben was about to snap, For fucks sake, then caught a glimpse of the swearing vicar in the mirror and shut his mouth. He strode out of the bedroom, thundered down the stairs and across the entrance hall. The doorbell was still ringing relentlessly. All right, Im coming Im coming! he yelled.
Ben wrenched open the door.
There was a woman standing on the doorstep. She was slender, about the same age as Brooke. Her hair was longer than it had been when Ben had last seen her, and it had gone back to its natural dark red. She was wearing it loose, ringlets tumbling down over her shoulders.
She looked at Ben in amazement. Holy crap, she said. Ben?
Ben blinked in disbelief. It was her.
It was Roberta Ryder.
Chapter Three
The stunned silence seemed to go on forever as they both stood there staring at one another. He was gaping at her; she was gaping at what he was wearing.
Are you? she said at last. You havent become a?
Eh? No, I was just trying them on, he muttered, glancing down at himself.
Oh, right. That explains it.
Another few seconds passed, neither of them knowing what to say. Well, arent you going to invite me in? she asked.
Ben led her through into the living-room, stunned and lost for words. Roberta Ryder, PhD, effortlessly attractive and beguiling, brilliantly intelligent, frequently cantankerous, the most opinionated and headstrong woman hed ever known: the American scientist had once meant a great deal to him and she was someone hed always known he would never forget.