She had a much better dinner than Prince Bennett, who had to dance with every single one of the hundred and twenty-one princesses. He thought he had better make an early start. He danced with each princess, one after another, and they all smiled and agreed with whatever he said.
They were lovely. They were the nicest girls he had ever met. They were so pleasant that he could not tell them apart. They were so charming that he had the horrid feeling that nobody could be that nice all the time. So how could he possibly know which were nice for most of the time? One or two might not be nice at all, but might just be putting it on for the party. And very sorry he would be if he married one of them! Prince Bennetts head was spinning by the time he came and sat down beside Florizella, who was just finishing a bowl of raspberries.
Would you like a dance? he asked politely.
Not especially, said Florizella. And I would have thought you might have had enough.
Yes, I have, Prince Bennett said honestly. I think its the worst party Ive ever been to.
Have a choc-ice, said Florizella to cheer him up, and Prince Bennett started to feel better.
Youre a girl, he said trustingly. You advise me. How can you tell which princesses are really nice and which are just pretending?
Florizella looked around. I only know a few of them. Most of them I dont know any better than you do, she said. The thing you have to remember is that they all have to be nice to you because its in the Rules. Youre the handsome prince.
Thats just it! Bennett groaned. How do I choose which one to marry?
You could disguise yourself as a woodcutter, Florizella said helpfully, and go away for seven years, walk all round other kingdoms and see if you meet your True Love.
Thats a really rubbish idea, Prince Bennett said. Im not cutting wood for seven years.
Or you could go and work as a swineherd in a royal palace and see if the princess chooses you?
Im not being a swineherd! Bennett exclaimed. Do you have any idea what swine are?
Then dont marry anyone, Florizella said helpfully. I wouldnt.
But I have to! All princes have to give balls and choose their princess and get married. Then they have to live happily ever after.
Florizella frowned. I know people say thats a happy ending, but they never say exactly how to do it.
Prince Bennett nodded. Or how to do it forever after, he said dolefully. Thats the whole problem with being a fairytale prince.
Then the band played and poor Prince Bennett had to go and dance with another princess, and then another and another, until the clock struck midnight and all the princesses got up at once, rushed up the stairs and limped to their beds. There were one hundred and twenty glass slippers dumped on the stairs like a jumble sale. Bennett picked up sixty of them, and then gave up.
This is getting completely ridiculous, said Florizella.
That night all the beautiful princesses set their alarm clocks for six in the morning to give themselves time to get up early and find their shoes, have their baths, wash their hair and put on new dresses for breakfast.
The next day, Prince Bennett was in the parlour waiting for them, and as each princess came in, he bowed very low and said, Good morning!
Each princess curtsied and smiled, and said, Good morning, Prince Bennett!
Then the tired prince said, What would you like for breakfast?
And each princess said, I dont know. What are you having?
When Prince Bennett said he was having porridge, every one of the one hundred and twenty princesses gasped as if he had said something dreadful, and said, Oh, no! Not for me! Just a glass of herbal tea, please! Nothing else!
One or two of them even said, Just a glass of hot water! and all the other princesses looked envious that they had not thought of that, and gazed at Prince Bennett to see if he was impressed.
So he was very glad to see Princess Florizella, who came in late because she had been out to the stables to see her horse. And he was very glad when she said at once that she would like bacon and eggs, and tomatoes and sausages too, if they had any. They had a most peaceful, hearty breakfast while, all around, the one hundred and twenty princesses sipped tea and looked beautiful but hungry.
After breakfast, Prince Bennett asked the princess on his right what she would like to do that day. And the princess on his right said, I dont know. What would you like to do?
Then Prince Bennett asked the princess on his left what she would like to do that day. And she said, I dont know. What would you like to do?
Then Princess Florizella suggested very helpfully, Why dont we all ride down to the Deep Lakes and go swimming? We could take a picnic with us.
Well some of the princesses couldnt ride, and some of them couldnt swim. Some of them hadnt got trousers for riding, and some of them hadnt got swimming costumes. Some of them were frightened of cold water, and some of them were frightened of horses, and none of them would dream of eating a picnic sitting on the ground where there might be ants or wasps.
Or grass! one of them exclaimed.
And they all said, Grass stains! Oh no!
So in the end, no one went except Princess Florizella and Prince Bennett.
They had a lovely day.
When they were trotting back to the princes palace in the evening, just as the stars were starting to come out and the sky was getting grey, Prince Bennett said happily, Florizella, Ive had the most brilliant idea. I wont marry any of the one hundred and twenty beautiful princesses. Ill marry you!
And then Florizella said something that surprised him so much that he nearly fell off his horse.
No, thank you, she said politely.
Prince Bennett gawped at her. Why ever not? he asked. I am a fairytale prince, remember. And you would be my queen.
Look here, said Florizella reasonably, I told you I wasnt going to marry, and I meant it. One day I shall inherit the Seven Kingdoms, and there are a lot of things I want to do there. I dont want to come and be your queen. Im not even sure that I think kings and queens are a good idea. It might be a lot better for everyone if people made up their own laws and didnt have one person ruling everything.
Why should I come and live in your palace when Ive got a perfectly good palace of my own? Im not even planning to keep that one all to myself Im going to share it. Another home would just be greedy.
And I dont want to live in your country. Ive got one of my own. I dont need your fortune. I can earn my own money. Id very much like it if you were my friend, though my best friend, if you like. But I dont want to marry you. Im not actually intending to marry anyone.
And I dont want to live in your country. Ive got one of my own. I dont need your fortune. I can earn my own money. Id very much like it if you were my friend, though my best friend, if you like. But I dont want to marry you. Im not actually intending to marry anyone.
Prince Bennett rode along saying nothing for a little while. He was wondering if he really liked this new sort of princess. Certainly, she wasnt like the normal ones in fairy tales. This was not how the Rules said it should be. Perhaps it was better for him to have a princess at his side who agreed with every single thing he said, however stupid? But then he smiled.
Florizella, he said, I think I agree with you. I wont choose a princess to marry, either. I shall tell my mother and father. And I should like to be best friends with you.
So Princess Florizella and Prince Bennett shook hands and rode back side by side in the starlight.
When Florizella got home, the king and queen were waiting for her at the door of the palace.
How did you get on? asked the queen.
Who did he choose for his bride? asked the king.
How many princesses were there at the ball? asked the queen.
Did he choose the princess of Three Rivers? the king asked.
Florizella laughed and jumped out of the carriage.
I had a lovely time, she said. And he decided not to marry anybody just yet. There were one hundred and twenty princesses there as well as me, and I didnt spot the princess of the Three Rivers, but the place was so awash with princesses that I didnt even see the princess of the Two Mountains, who promised to meet me there.
Not choosing a bride! said the king.
Not choosing a bride! said the queen.
Then they both fell on Florizella at once, demanding to know what on earth could have made him decide not to choose a princess at a princess-choosing ball. They were secretly afraid that Florizella had somehow put him off marriage.
So Florizella explained that Prince Bennett thought the nice princesses might have been just pretending to be nice and might be secretly rather awful to live with, and he hadnt wanted to take the chance.
Did he ask no one at all, then? demanded the king. Not one of them?
Oh yes, said Florizella. He asked me. But I told him I didnt want to marry yet.
The king and queen stared at each other for a stunned moment, then they both rushed at Florizella again and made her sit down and tell them all about the ball and the breakfast and the horseride and the picnic for two and Prince Bennett asking her to marry him under the stars. They took a lot of interest in the stars. And if there was a nightingale singing. Then the king jumped to his feet and went to the window and said, Undoubtedly! Undootedly! a great many times, very softly.
And the queen had a little smile on her face as she looked at Florizella.
What a match! said the king. Prince Bennetts kingdom! The Land of Deep Lakes! Its beyond my wildest dreams!
What a triumph! said the queen. And everyone always said she was such an odd sort of princess!
Florizella looked from one to the other.
I said I didnt want to marry him, and we agreed to be just friends, she said. But she could tell they werent listening.
The next day, her father the king laughed and teased her all day, calling her the Queen of the Land of Deep Lakes, which was rather irritating.
The second day, the queen spoke of inviting Prince Bennett over to stay.
The next couple of days there were lots of letters between Prince Bennetts parents and Florizellas mother and father. Then on the fifth day the king told Florizella that she was going to marry Bennett whether she wanted to or not.
Florizella looked at him as if he were crazy. You cant make me marry someone if I dont want to, she said. Its just wrong.
Oh, cant I? said the king.
He snatched Florizella up and bundled her upstairs, and locked her in her bedroom.
Youll stay there until you agree to marry Prince Bennett! he bawled through the keyhole.
Nonsense, said Florizella. She knew perfectly well that her father had no right to lock her up, or to order her to marry anyone. No one can tell a girl who she has to marry. She also knew that if she wanted to leave, nothing was easier than to open her bedroom window and climb down the drainpipe. After all, she went out like that most mornings to go horseriding. It was so much easier than opening the great double doors, raising the portcullis and lowering the drawbridge on her own. But, instead of running off, she thought she would wait until her father came to let her out and talk the whole thing over with him. So she got one of her favourite storybooks and settled down for a quiet mornings reading.
Florizellas lunch was served on a tray in her room by ten footmen.
At teatime they arrived again with a cup of tea and a slice of cake.
By dinnertime Florizella had finished her book and was pretty bored.
At bedtime her father came to the door and said in his most kingly voice, My daughter, Princess Florizella, this is your father.
I did know that already, she said.
Do you agree to marry Prince Bennett?
Florizella, who was rather sulky, for she had wasted a whole day indoors while the sun was shining outside, said, Certainly not! And you know you shouldnt treat a daughter like this. Not even in a fairy story.
At that, the king stamped off to bed in a terrible temper. He was cross because Florizella would not do as he wanted, and he was cross because he knew perfectly well he was in the wrong.
Shes acting like she thinks shes a prince! he complained to the queen as they went to bed that night.
A princess is just a prince with more ss, she replied.
The king thought for a moment. What do the ss stand for?
Sass, she said. Sass and science, sensibility and scepticism. Sincerity, spirit and certainty.
Thats a c, said the king. Undoubtedly.
And tomorrow, the queen continued, Florizella is to be let out, whatever she says about Prince Bennett.
The king said, Humph, as if he meant No. But he really meant Yes. There is nothing more boring than being a tyrant.
But next morning, before anyone was up, there was a great Tooroo! Tooroo! at the palace gates, and in galloped Prince Bennett with half a dozen of his courtiers, a dozen soldiers and a couple of trumpeters. Just a small informal visit.