Is that a good sigh? A bad sigh?
She chewed her lip. I dont know.
Then she shook her head and forked up some salmon. Im a liar. Its a good sigh. Also, the salmon is fantastic.
He preened a moment as he grinned before letting her off the hook. So why are you eating microwave burritos for lunch, anyway? The library isnt that far from some pretty great little cafés.
Im a horrible cook. Sometimes I cant get away from work for an hour for this or that reason, and I need something quick. Plus, I eat out. A lot. Its better than a frozen diet meal, which tastes like tears and loneliness. I hate them. And yet, my freezer is full of them.
He wrinkled his nose and then gave her curves a covetous look. Why in Gods name do you need diet meals?
I love doughnuts and I hate exercise.
Sex is great exercise. Im just saying.
Hmm. Im not sure its a good selling point when youre trying to get one woman into bed to reference other women.
He cringed and then caught the twinkle in her eyes. Oh, my God. Youre teasing me.
She shrugged. Some people think Im funny. Even those of us who shush others for a living know how to laugh.
He snickered and then paused as he imagined her all stern in a pencil skirt and a button-down white shirt. Maybe with a ruler and some really high black pumps and stockings with the line down the back.
Leading up to those twin red bows.
Clearing his throat, he drained the rest of his champagne and poured them both some more.
Why libraries?
I was in my third year as an undergrad and I went to a job fair. I wandered up and down the aisles, took brochures. Took notes. Asked questions dutifully. And I ended up at the MLIS peoplemasters in library and information sciencespent forty-five minutes with them. I liked them. I liked what they did. Until that, Id been considering getting a teaching degree. One of the folks I met that day urged me to apply to the graduate MLIS program, and I did.
They continued to eat as she spoke.
So I looked around and kept at it, and he was so helpful and kind and open. I applied and got in. She paused. Of course, by the time I was ready to graduate, the economy had changed. With all the cuts to libraries, I wasnt sure what would happen. Id been working part-time in a library near campus, so I knew how tight things were. I considered jobs outside public librarieslaw firms need librarians, for instance. Colleges, universities, that sort of thing. But...the public library is important. I really wanted to pursue a position that way. This job here in town opened up, and one of my friends told me about it, and thats pretty much history.
You probably could have made a lot more money elsewhere.
Her eyes lost that teasing light and she got serious. Libraries are important, Paddy. Libraries are not just a place to check out books. Theyre a haven, a safe place for so many kids. You cannot undervalue that. Being a place, a home for people who need to escape their own unsafe places is something libraries provide. Its a priceless thing. Some kids dont have any adults in their lives who give a shit about them. They can go to the childrens librarian who does something as simple as holding back a book she thinks that kid would like, and it changes everything. I make enough to pay my bills and fortunately, I have family money, too. That I have the ability to be part of someones safe place means everything to me.
Right then, Paddy fell a little bit in love with Natalie Clayton with her ferocity about kids and libraries.
Go down a layer or two and youre a fierce bitch about kids. I like that a lot.
She shrugged.
Family money?
She looked away a moment and then nodded. Yes. I considered giving it all up, but in the end, I like using it to help other people.
What does your family think?
Lets talk about you for a while. Why did you stay here in Hood River instead of heading to L.A. or Seattle or New York?
I like all those places. I actually do have a condo in Manhattan and a place in Santa Barbara, where I head when I need the ocean. But my family is here. We have enough land that I can be left alone when I need it, but my brothers and my parents are close enough that I can get on my bike or take a brisk walk and be on someones doorstep in a few minutes. I help when Im around. We built a studio in an old converted barn, and we do all our own production there. I know where everything is. No one bothers us in town, really. I guess at the end of it, this is my home. Everyone should have a home.
She smiled at him and it made him happy.
I like Hood River a lot. Love it in the fall best. Love the colors of the leaves. So gorgeous.
I thought you grew up in Medina?
No. My grandparents lived there. I grew up in Los Angeles, actually. I visited a few times every year, but I grew up in a world where the leaves never changed.
Where at in L.A.?
Whittier. Its a suburb east of downtown. So you mentioned a sister-in-law? When did your brother get married?
She was touchy about her family, obviously.
Lets see, um, about a year ago. Yeah, theyre coming up on their anniversary soon. Do you have siblings?
I grew up thinking no. But a few years ago, my grandmother let it slip after five glasses of wine that a person I thought was my second cousin is actually my sister.
Wow, thats some daytime-talk-show stuff right there. How did she react? Did she know?
She doesnt know and really, shes better off not knowing. Not like shes missing out on any sort of stellar parenting.
You dont want to tell her? To have a relationship with her? Paddy couldnt imagine not going to someone who was his brother or sister. He may fight like crazy with his brothers, but he couldnt imagine not having them all in his life.
A shadow of grief passed across Natalies face for the briefest of breaths. She grew up in a relatively normal household with both parents. Shes married and has three kids of her own. She runs a stationery store with her husband in a small town in Nevada. Her life is good. Who am I to tell her that her mother had an affair and everything shes ever believed is a lie? What right do I have to do that?
He sat back. He hadnt thought of it like that, but she was right. Took the weight of knowing, hed figured, but shed done it to protect her sister.
Im sorry. You didnt have such a great childhood, then?
A shrug. I have a good life now. Thats what counts. So is it weird being a rock star?
Yes. Sometimes its totally weird. Having a conversation with this woman was an intricate process. Shed revealed things, personal things, but there were other topics she wove around and avoided.
He wanted to know her. All her wounds and sore spots as well as things that made her smile.
Like how?
Well, you know, Im just Paddy. Ive been me my whole life. So Ill be walking down the street in Manhattan and suddenly someone will gasp and call my name out and its like...being recognized as Paddy Hurley from Sweet Hollow Ranch has its own unique tone. Its great. I mean, Im happy people love our music and it pays my bills and enables me to do what I love and travel all over the world and stuff. But its an odd thing to have someone shake and cry just because theyve seen me on my way back from grabbing a coffee.
Must make you feel responsible on some level, though.
He warmed, pleased shed gotten that. Yeah. I mean, normally, if you catch me before Ive had coffee, Im grumpy. I can tell my brothers to fuck off and leave me be, but that teenage girl? I have to dig deep sometimes because I dont want to be that guy. Even when Im tired or hungry or pissed off.
Must be exhausting to be on all the time.
Another reason I live here and not L.A. or Manhattan. Anonymity is not overrated. I can go get groceries in a ratty pair of jeans and it wont show up ten minutes later online. Im protected here. Once Im out in the larger world, its different. People you dont know just make shit up about you. I hate that. Two years ago we were on tour and I got food poisoning. Have you ever had it? Its the worst. I thought I was going to die. Anyway, so they had to take me to the emergency room because it was so bad, and so of course, it was reported that Id overdosed. My mom flipped out. He stopped abruptly, and she reached out, touching his hand.
I know. About Ezra, I mean. Its sort of impossible not to have seen all the reporting on it at the time.
Paddy swallowed. He was careful sharing things about Ezra, who was so powerfully private in the wake of his battle with addiction.
Your mom nearly lost one son, so Im sure it was very upsetting for her to read that about another one of her sons. You all do live pretty hard out there on the road.
Did you look us up, then? He wasnt sure if he was embarrassed or flattered or what.
She snorted. Please. I live in the world. The modern world with television and media. Youre supercute brothers in a rock band together. Of course its common knowledge that you booze it up and carouse when youre on tour. I dont need to be Sherlock Holmes to know that.
Oh. Yeah. Probably. Its not as wild as they make it out to be. Mostly. Since Mary, especially. She came with them on tour and there was no way shed stand for any bullshit in her presence.
Anyway, so yes, its weird. But it gets me great tables at restaurants. I fly first-class. I dont have to worry about money because I have enough, and I have a great accountant who manages it for me and invests it for my future. Ive met some amazing people, seen some amazing things. I do this thing I dreamed about, and were lucky enough that were successful at it.
They finished dinner and dessert.
So, howd I do?
She looked back over her shoulder as shed been standing, leaning to trail her fingers through the water.
Dinner was great.
Date-wise?
Not much to complain about. Gorgeous man. Really nice boat. Beautiful scenery. The weather is perfect.
He took her hand and took her down to the stern. Gorgeous, huh? He turned her to face him and got close, the rail at her back.
Are we pretending you dont know how pretty you are?
Nah. She made him smile a lot. Still, its nice to hear from a beautiful woman I really hope to kiss a time or two tonight.
I have such bad judgment. Natalie said it, but she had no plans to fight it.
Really, now? That sounds like itll be a win for me.
She laughed, placing her palm on his chest. Youre bad for me.
I promise not to rot your teeth or give you diabetes. That means Im way better for you than doughnuts.
She slid her hand up to his throat and around to the back of his neck. He stepped the last bit, bringing her to him, his arm around her waist.
He lowered his head, and she went to her tiptoes to meet him halfway for a kiss.
Ha, kiss was such a mild word for what it was.
She wove her fingers through his hair and tugged to keep him there. If she was going to make a really bad decision, she wasnt going to do it halfway.
Plus, he was really good at kissing.
He traced her bottom lip with the tip of his tongue and then nipped hard enough to make her gasp. Thats when he barged right into her mouth and turned her knees to jelly.
And clearly, she needed to work as hard as he was working, so she hummed and sucked his tongue. He arched into her body, holding her tighter. She lost herself in him, in the way his hands felt on her body. In his taste as it filled her up and rendered her useless to think about anything else but his mouth on hers.
Out there, it was just the two of them. The stars overhead, the sound of the water, the breeze, Paddy and Natalie, and it was perfect, so she didnt fight it.
That kiss slid into another and another until her head spun, and she clung to him, taking it in, savoring every moment until he finally broke away, though his arms remained around her.
Yeah. So that was fucking awesome.
She laughed as she tried to catch her breath.
Do you want to go for a swim?
I didnt bring a bathing suit. Also, she sure as heck wasnt going to wear some cast-off suit from another chick he brought out there.
Theres no one around. You dont need a suit.
The sexual invitation in his voice wrapped around her, caressing, teasing.
Its been a really hot day. Ive got fluffy towels and a shower here to rinse the river off if you want.
He pulled his shirt off like a challenge.
Live a little dangerously.
He unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans, easing them down, and she wasnt surprised in the least that he didnt have any underwear on. Or that he was really interested in that swim.
He followed her gaze to his cock and looked back with a grin. Yeah, well. Youre sort of irresistible. But I promise its just an invitation to swim. Not that I really dont want to fuck you, because I do. But well take it at your pace.
He popped a cushion from a nearby couch free, revealing a stack of neatly folded towels. He pulled two out. What do you say?
She needed to say no. Needed to say she had work in the morning and should really go home.
But she found herself saying, You go in first.
With a grin, he jumped from the deck into the water with a splash. Ill even keep my back turned until you get in.
She unbuttoned her dress, slid from it, her bra and panties, folded them and put them out of splash range and took a running jump from the boat into the river.
CHAPTER SIX
SO, IT WENT GOOD, huh? Tuesday paused to examine a pair of hand-beaded slippers. Theyd headed to a craft fair in Portland and had sucked down coffee and sang along to the radio on the way.
It was... Yeah, it was good. He made me dinner and wooed me a little.
It had been a few days since the date, but she and Tuesday had barely connected between work and other stuff, so this was the first time theyd been able to talk about it all.
Tuesday put the slippers down, and they moved on, this time it was Natalie who paused to look at a framed photograph that had been hand-tinted. Wow, this is fantastic. She turned to Tuesday. This would look perfect in the front hallway, dont you think?
Tuesday nodded, and Natalie bought it, tucking it carefully into the rolling cart she brought to fairs, green markets and swap meets.
Did you sleep with him?
Natalie snorted. Youre so shy.