She hugged herself tighter as if to shield herself from him. Not that its any of your business, but yes, my mothers name was Hannah Stolzfus. She died shortly after I was born, so I never knew her, but Ive seen the birth certificate. That was her name.
His jaw seemed to harden, if that was possible. Why did you come here?
She looked at him blankly. You already know why I came here. To open my practice. What on earth is going on? Why did those women walk out of Ruths today after they saw my quilt pieces? Why did the carpenters leave?
You really dont understand, do you? Frustration edged his tone.
Understand what? She had plenty of her own frustration to go around. Why is everyone talking in riddles?
All right. No riddles. His hands pressed against the table so hard it might collapse under his weight. Just straightforward English words. Emma Brandt is the younger sister of Hannah Stolzfus. And the older woman who looked at those quilt pieces and recognized them is her mother, Louise Stolzfus.
Her mother, Louise Stolzfus. My grandmother. She could say the words in her head, but not out loud. She tried to stop the inward shaking that she couldnt let him see.
I didnt know. She spaced the words out clearly. Dont you understand? I had no idea anyone would recognize those quilt pieces. No idea that Emma Brandt was any relation to my mother. No idea that my mothers family was even still around here.
Ted obviously wasnt convinced. He straightened, folding his arms. Do you expect me to believe that?
I dont expect anything of you! She snapped the words and immediately regretted it. Getting angry at Ted wouldnt help matters any.
Please, Lord, help me deal with thiswith himin the right way.
Look, Im sorry. She thrust her hand into her hair, shoving it back from her face. Cant we talk about this sensibly, instead of sniping at each other?
His eyes were watchful, but he jerked a reluctant nod. All right. Talk.
She frowned, trying to get her mind around everything hed said. Are you sure about this? Emma is surely too young to be my mothers sister. Maybe its a different family altogether.
Some of the harshness seemed to go out of his face. Im sure. Amish families are often spread out over a lot of years. Hannah was the eldest, fifteen years older than Emma, who is the youngest.
I see. She had to admit he seemed sure of his facts. Even if what you say is true, Im not sure what all the fuss is about. Im sorry for startling them with the quilt, and obviously Ill get someone else to finish it for me.
And you think that will resolve the problem? He looked at her as if she were a creature from another planet.
The anger flickered again, but under it was a desolation she wouldnt give in to.
I dont know what else I can do or say. I didnt come here looking for my mothers family, and I dont particularly want anything to do with them. Maybe we can just chalk it up to an unfortunate coincidence and get on with our lives.
Ted had to remind himself that a city-bred creature like Fiona had no idea what she was talking about when it came to family relationships in a place like Crossroads. Hed pity her, if her coming wasnt creating such a problem for people he cared about, people he had to protect.
Did you actually think you could come here and not run into your mothers family? Why else would you pick Crossroads Township to settle in, if not to find them?
She shrugged, hugging her slim frame as if she needed protection from him. Her face was very pale, but her gray eyes blazed with life. With anger, probably aimed at him.
I came to this area because it had a need for nurse-midwives, thats why. And because I wanted to get to know the Flanagans, my fathers relatives. I didnt have any ulterior motives, and I certainly have no desire to intrude on my mothers family.
Why not? He shot the question at her. You admit you came to get to know your fathers family. Why not your mothers?
Her lips tightened into a firm line. She was probably thinking this wasnt his business, but he intended to know the truth if he had to stand here all night.
Because they rejected her. The words burst out of her. My mother. They turned away from her because she married an outsider. Why would I want a relationship with them now? They havent bothered about me all these years.
Thats not how it was. He remembered all hed heard, all hed known. Shes the one who left. She deserted them, not the other way around, and theyve never recovered from that.
How do you know so much about it? Suspicion edged her tone.
Emma had only been three when her sister left, but shed remembered how her mother had aged overnight, how all the happiness seemed to go out of the house with Hannah. And he remembered how shed cried in his arms when shed told him she couldnt do the same thing to her parents that her sister had done.
He stiffened. Some things Fiona didnt have the right to know, especially that.
Its a small community, he said. I dont think you realize how small. Ive been a friend of the family for a long time. I know how much the Stolzfus family grieved when Hannah left. I dont want to see them hurt again.
I dont want to hurt them. I dont want to have anything to do with them. She thrust her hands through her reddish-blond mane as if shed pull it out in her frustration. Cant you just accept that?
He watched her steadily, trying to read the truth in those gray eyes. Did she really believe what she was saying?
No, he said slowly. I cant accept that. How can I, when all of your actions have brought you to a place where youre bound to run into them? You say its not intentional, and maybe thats so. But the results are the same, and people I care about are already hurting as a result.
Im sorry. She stood very straight, facing him, her face pale and set. Sorry if this hurts them, and sorry you dont believe me. But they rejected my mother, and
Will you stop saying that? He took a step toward her, as if his very nearness might convince her to believe him. They did not turn her away.
Her face was like stone. I read about the Amish, once I was old enough to understand thats what my mother had been. I read about how they shun people who dont do what theyre supposed to.
That proves the old saying, doesnt it? He sighed in frustration. Did he have to give the woman a crash course in what it meant to be Amish? A little learning is a dangerous thing. Its true that someone might be separated from the congregation to help him see the error of his ways, but that doesnt apply in this case.
What do you mean? Doubt flickered in her face.
Hannah was seventeen when she left, not yet a baptized member of the church, so she didnt break any vows by what she did. Im sure her parents didnt approve of her choice, but if shed stayed, they would have made peace with it. They never had the chance. If shed come back, anytime, they probably would have welcomed her.
Fiona shook her head stubbornly. How can you say that? They never attempted to get in touch with her after she left. And after she died, they never tried to find me. My whole life, Ive never heard a word from them.
Her pain reached out and grabbed his heart, and for a moment he couldnt speak. The urge to comfort her was so strong he had to fight it back. He could pity her, yes, but his loyalties lay elsewhere.
Fiona, what makes you think they knew you existed?
He saw that hit her, saw the doubt and pain in her eyes, and thought hed be a long time regretting that hed put it there. But it had to be done. This was a bad situation, and an impulsive act on her part could make it even worse.
He shook his head. Im sorry, he said again. Could be you think Im interfering, and maybe I am. But the best thing you can do now is to stay away from the family. You dont begin to understand them, and you cant judge them by your California standards. Just leave them alone, before you cause each other more pain than you can bear.