12
This Parvus, a scoundrel with bulging eyes, sees further than me, this is unacceptable, thought Lenin and was indignant, this Parvus is an idiot with bulging eyes andand he is a Jew, but I am not. I will destroy it. He took a swipe at my authority with his plan. What is this idiot capable of? He can dismember the corpse of his mother for the sake of a world revolution, just as I can, he can betray the closest friend, pour blood over the country in the name of achieving his goals?
Parvus appeared to Lenin in 1905, but if Lenin was a minor pawn of this adventure, then Parvus was higher than the Tsar.
Once in penal servitude, Parvus escaped, found himself in Turkey, achieved outstanding success there, but never for a moment forgot about the collapse of Russia.
After filling his pockets with gold bars from various countries, he rushed off to Switzerland to meet Lenin. Lenin at that time was in need of help. I had to live on my mothers pension, which was clearly not enough for carousing, for prostitutes, for all sorts of other things. Being capricious and quarrelsome, he tired of his sponsors, constantly knocking out money.
And then Parvus fell out of the sky. Ill have to go to the meeting, where to go.
13
Parvus sat at a table in a famous cafe, drooling, with watery, bulging eyes, waiting for his imaginary friend.
Lenin appeared, thin, hunched, angry, in a dark shirt and a red vest, blowing his nose all the time and saying softly, without giving Parvus a hand:
Well, bitch, do you eat fat? Did you bring money?
I dont owe you anything, uncircumcised Jew, Parvus said, his eyes bulging even more.
Lenin stared without blinking; he was much shorter than Parvus, hunched over, one of his eyes squinted and kept squinting, waiting for Parvus to look down. But Parvus snapped the seeds, spat the husks, so that the husks brushed the future leaders bald head.
All right, Shalom, my friend, Ilyich said at last. Sponsors fail. When I become the Emperor of all Europe, I will cut out these sponsors like cabbage.
Parvus reached into his pocket and pulled out a wad of money wrapped in a rag.
There are a million marks here. Just dont take a swing at Europe, its too much. Russia is Enough for you. Start with Russia, and then well see. If you take power, dont forget that there is a citizen of the world named Pavus. The position of Finance Minister would suit me. I cant finish the mansion, I still dont have enough money.
Wait, wait. Should I start with Russia? from Russia? I dont care about Russia. Russia is a wild country, where only fools live-Asians, and I am a person of European scale.
Dont get mad. Remember Mordaha Levi and Engels. They chose Russia. Remember, socialism is slavery. We need to make the Russians slaves. And then on their shoulders to enter Europe.
I dont know, I dont know. I dont want to give up on my dream yet, not that character, but thank you for the money. If I get rich, Ill give it back.
You will never be so rich, and you will never have as much money as I have. So lets target Russia. No one in the world can do what you can do with my help.
How do you know?
Lenin filled the floor of his pocket with seeds and also began to spit.
Yes, because there is no such vile, such an immoral person as you. All communities of the world do not recognize your greatness, and will not remember your name because of your cruelty, meanness and inhumanity, you are a devil in the form of a man. You, Volodya, are a complete idiot. And give good. When I get the go-ahead, Ill go straight to the Kaiser of Germany in Berlin and squeeze 50 million marks out of him for a coup and one million soldiers armed to the teeth. You will seize power in Petrograd, playfully. Youll make me Finance Minister.
Or you can shoot them. In short, we have a deal. Only, Lenin thought, he already had a phrase in his brain, but he was in no hurry to voice it.
What is just that?
Only Russia is just a platform for the beginning of the world revolution. In this case, I agree with everything. But dont forget, the position of Supreme remains with me, and the position of Finance Minister will be decided. We just need to get out of here. Now it is not easy to get to Russia: the war.
Ill take care of everything.
At least buy me a beer... what are cookies, and that my women are only treated to pasta.
14
Parvus had no trouble getting to the war Ministers reception in Berlin and laid out his clear plan for becoming a winner in Europe. The Minister jumped up in his chair and said curtly:
Waiter! Go on!
Since Russia has the most powerful army on the Eastern front, this army must be decomposed, and decomposing the army can be by coming to power of extreme left-wing extremists, take power in the country and become a dictator. The dictators last name is Lenin.
Ah, thats a familiar name, hes a member of our counterintelligence service, and Germany pays him a lot of money. And you think this is the right candidate?
He pressed the call button.
Hoffman to me.
General Hoffmann entered.
How does your ZUZIK? Report to us.
A high-class scoundrel. He quarreled with everyone. Hes been sitting around and snitching. He was given a dark night twice. But he is the head of the Bolshevik party, and the Bolshevik party stands for Russias defeat in the war with Germany. I look at it negatively. He has Russian citizenship. How can this be done? He had already begun to propagandize that his Bolshevik party favored the defeat of Russia in the war with Germany. You cant find a better scoundrel.
I see that you agree, Minister, Parvus said more confidently. But in order to work out according to this plan, it is necessary that Germany allocate 50 million marks for the coup, for the maintenance of the Communist party and for the relocation of Lenin and his gang to the capital of Russia, Petrograd. They should be given a bulletproof, sealed car and allowed to pass through the front line.
The Minister promised to allocate this amount within ten days.
* * *
At this time Lenin was already writing small articles in small Newspapers about the Bolshevik partys support for Russias defeat in the war with Germany. These small articles were thrown over the front line into the trenches, fell into the hands of soldiers, natives of the peasants and workers, and were read out at meetings to applause.
Correctly Lyalin calls, necha to fight with each other, it is necessary to fraternize. All men are brothers.
15
Our party stands for the defeat of Russia in this war. When Russia is put on its back, the Bolsheviks will seize power and it will be possible to turn the imperialist war into a civil one.
Russian Russian troops are successful on the Russo-German front, and then the Russian troops push the Germans back. Why not take advantage of these changes in the interests of the world revolution? What if we could bring Russia to its knees, put its army from within, to overthrow the king and seize power? And the Germans, as a sign of gratitude, will allocate funds, because who can help implement a brilliant plan? Of Course, Germany. Germany should defeat Russia and the Bolsheviks provides it with an invaluable service.
Russian Russian troops are successful on the Russo-German front, and then the Russian troops push the Germans back. Why not take advantage of these changes in the interests of the world revolution? What if we could bring Russia to its knees, put its army from within, to overthrow the king and seize power? And the Germans, as a sign of gratitude, will allocate funds, because who can help implement a brilliant plan? Of Course, Germany. Germany should defeat Russia and the Bolsheviks provides it with an invaluable service.
Lenin did not sleep for two nights and made a plan (based on the plan of Parvus), which was destined to be realized. He actually only put extra commas, and amplified sentences by repeating the same words. He stole this plan from him, just as he would later steal the slogan from the social revolutionaries: Peace to the people, land to the peasants, factories and factories to the workers.
In these circumstances, the question arose: who should implement the plan of Parvus-Parvus himself or he, Lenin? Who should I bet on? On Parvus? No! where is this Parvus? Where is ganetsky, serve Parvus and ganetsky! We must negotiate. The bet must be placed on him, on Lenin!
Ganetsky came running, but Parvus could not be found during the day with fire.
Proud, you rascal. Judge him by a revolutionary court, as the prostitute who dared to insult the leader of the world revolution, that is, me.
Vladimir Ilyich, said Fusternbergganetsky in a trembling voice, as he saw the muscles of Lenins face tighten, the lines on his face smooth out, and his eyes pop out of their sockets. Parvus collects money from theaters that stage Gorkys play at the bottom in Germany. Gorky gave such an order, he wants to help the world revolution and his friend, that is, you, Vladimir Ilyich. Twenty percent goes to the author of the play, twenty to Parvus, and the rest goes to the party register, as I have already told you. Maxim Gorky is your friend, he is a friend of the world revolution and my friend. And you wanted to hang him for it as a token of gratitude, so to speak. That is, I mean Parvus, our breadwinner, the Saviour of the revolution.
That scoundrel is Bitter. You need to give all your money, like me, for example. You bring me whole bags, and I give them to the cause of the world revolution.
After a well-expressed thought, ganetsky began to smooth his paces, and when he smoothed his paces, Lenin already knew that ganetsky was thirsty, his throat was dry.
You dont understand jokes, ganetsky! Gorky and I rested in Capri and argued and argued. He demanded that the party call Marx by his real name Mordychai, and I objected. Marx is almost the world, and Mordichai black Jew, you know?
16
Zinoviev, that is, Apfelbaum, had returned from Paris before his time, looking battered, battered, scratched, with a large bruise under his left eye, limping on his right leg, as if seeking help from someone. He must have been picked on somewhere along the way, because he liked to harass ladies accompanied by gentlemen, introduced himself unnecessarily, and immediately inquired the name of the lady.
Not always did this behavior get away with the impudent Jew, who liked to take the bull by the horns. This time he had the audacity to whisper in the ladys ear that he was up to his knees. The lady, half in joy, half in terror, exclaimed, George, help me out!
Georges did not knock out the revolutionary himself; he merely nodded to the two guards who accompanied him.
The worst thing that happened was that Gershon wetted his underpants so profusely that trickles ran down his sandals, which threw him into an area of shame and discomfort. He had to take off his sandals, wring out his socks, and put them on his bare feet.
After passing two houses and seeing another couple: a short man in a straw hat, and a lady with painted lips, looked at him, and he read on her face: I want you, and immediately rushed to the diner, followed the couple, immediately ordered two glasses of tea and warmed up. The lady noticed his bare feet and immediately turned away with disdain. Um, it didnt work out, he said aloud and ran to Lenin, whom he hadnt seen for two weeks.
Whats up, Gershon? Why the black eye? the chief asked. You must have been whipped by the bourgeoisie for preaching in the square when you called for a world revolution.
At the barricades fought. At the heart of Paris. We were three Jews with sticks, and there were about two dozen of us. Its a good thing they didnt. We were saved by singing the Marseillaise. The Japanese understood from the melody that we were representatives of the proletariat. Volodya, but I had to wet my pants. They are still wet. Do you have any extra clothes?
What isnt, isnt. I suffer myself. I only get new trousers twice a week, but I should have them every day. My trousers are always wet. I suffer from incontinence, leader of the world proletariat. If you want, my suit is in the trash, I just changed it. I hope my trousers are dry. Why are there no socks? Youre lying, Gershon, and you havent even blinked an eye, Lenin advanced, squinting his left eye.
What would you do without me? Gershon asked a provocative question.
Gershon, dont brag or lie. Probably hit someone and got it in the snout. The way to do it. Did you bring money? We are catastrophically short of money, and without money you cant make a revolution.
Our book was published in Paris, but it only contains your name, and we both worked harder than you. Gibberish, however, turned out, but it justifies the name What to do.
You worked hard, Im sure, but I was thinking. These are my thoughts in this great work, not yours. you havent grown up to be the leader of the world revolution. Lets sit down, lets make edits, remove inaccuracies, there are a lot of our assumptions, and life makes adjustments
17
Gershon paused. I realized that it was useless to argue. He had already changed into ragged trousers and a sleeveless shirt: although Lenin used him as his servant, he kept a tight rein on him.
What are you doing with a knife?
Im sharpening my pencils.. .
Great works are written with a quill pen. Listen, Gershon, have you met Inessa in Paris? At a rally, she made a speech and said my name, referring to my great works, including What should I do? Maybe she bought this book and wants to meet me, you dont know. I caught a glimpse of her once.
I havent seen it anywhere, though Ive searched day and night, Gershon lied shamelessly.
Well, then, go to Paris, grab her hand, and say: the leader of the world proletariat orders you to appear naked before him this minute, said Ilyich, and rolled his eyes.
And when the chief rolled his eyes, Gershon knew it was useless to argue. He threw on a robe, grabbed an armful of sharpened pencils from a Desk drawer, put them in an inner pocket, and ran out into the street.
Shalom, Ilyich, he said on the way, noticing that Ilyich was mincing along behind him.
Um, tramps, a party of tramps. Well done, Lenin shouted, catching up with Gershon, weve already managed something, but not quite, because pop Gapon intervened, down with Popov!
Pop Gapon went out on your assignment, Apfelbaum said at once.
What? How dare you object, Apfelbaum? Out! get out, you damned Jew.
Youre a Jew yourself Kalmyk, said the response in the hearts of, but immediately fell on his knees and began to kiss in a bunt.