It was not for such love Christ forgave her, broke impatiently from the gentle Father Iosif.
Yes, it was for such, monks, it was! You save your souls here, eating cabbage, and think you are the righteous. You eat a gudgeon a day, and you think you bribe God with gudgeon.
This is unendurable! was heard on all sides in the cell.
But this unseemly scene was cut short in a most unexpected way. Father Zossima rose suddenly from his seat. Almost distracted with anxiety for the elder and every one else, Alyosha succeeded, however, in supporting him by the arm. Father Zossima moved towards Dmitri and reaching him sank on his knees before him. Alyosha thought that he had fallen from weakness, but this was not so. The elder distinctly and deliberately bowed down at Dmitris feet till his forehead touched the floor. Alyosha was so astounded that he failed to assist him when he got up again. There was a faint smile on his lips.
Goodby! Forgive me, all of you! he said, bowing on all sides to his guests.
Dmitri stood for a few moments in amazement. Bowing down to himwhat did it mean? Suddenly he cried aloud, Oh, God! hid his face in his hands, and rushed out of the room. All the guests flocked out after him, in their confusion not saying goodby, or bowing to their host. Only the monks went up to him again for a blessing.
What did it mean, falling at his feet like that? Was it symbolic or what? said Fyodor Pavlovitch, suddenly quieted and trying to reopen conversation without venturing to address anybody in particular. They were all passing out of the precincts of the hermitage at the moment.
I cant answer for a madhouse and for madmen, Miüsov answered at once illhumoredly, but I will spare myself your company, Fyodor Pavlovitch, and, trust me, for ever. Wheres that monk?
That monk, that is, the monk who had invited them to dine with the Superior, did not keep them waiting. He met them as soon as they came down the steps from the elders cell, as though he had been waiting for them all the time.
Reverend Father, kindly do me a favor. Convey my deepest respect to the Father Superior, apologize for me, personally, Miüsov, to his reverence, telling him that I deeply regret that owing to unforeseen circumstances I am unable to have the honor of being present at his table, greatly as I should desire to do so, Miüsov said irritably to the monk.
And that unforeseen circumstance, of course, is myself, Fyodor Pavlovitch cut in immediately. Do you hear, Father; this gentleman doesnt want to remain in my company or else hed come at once. And you shall go, Pyotr Alexandrovitch, pray go to the Father Superior and good appetite to you. I will decline, and not you. Home, home, Ill eat at home, I dont feel equal to it here, Pyotr Alexandrovitch, my amiable relative.
I am not your relative and never have been, you contemptible man!
I said it on purpose to madden you, because you always disclaim the relationship, though you really are a relation in spite of your shuffling. Ill prove it by the church calendar. As for you, Ivan, stay if you like. Ill send the horses for you later. Propriety requires you to go to the Father Superior, Pyotr Alexandrovitch, to apologize for the disturbance weve been making.
Is it true that you are going home? Arent you lying?
Pyotr Alexandrovitch! How could I dare after whats happened! Forgive me, gentlemen, I was carried away! And upset besides! And, indeed, I am ashamed. Gentlemen, one man has the heart of Alexander of Macedon and another the heart of the little dog Fido. Mine is that of the little dog Fido. I am ashamed! After such an escapade how can I go to dinner, to gobble up the monasterys sauces? I am ashamed, I cant. You must excuse me!
The devil only knows, what if he deceives us? thought Miüsov, still hesitating, and watching the retreating buffoon with distrustful eyes. The latter turned round, and noticing that Miüsov was watching him, waved him a kiss.
Well, are you coming to the Superior? Miüsov asked Ivan abruptly.
Why not? I was especially invited yesterday.
Unfortunately I feel myself compelled to go to this confounded dinner, said Miüsov with the same irritability, regardless of the fact that the monk was listening. We ought, at least, to apologize for the disturbance, and explain that it was not our doing. What do you think?
Yes, we must explain that it wasnt our doing. Besides, father wont be there, observed Ivan.
Why not? I was especially invited yesterday.
Unfortunately I feel myself compelled to go to this confounded dinner, said Miüsov with the same irritability, regardless of the fact that the monk was listening. We ought, at least, to apologize for the disturbance, and explain that it was not our doing. What do you think?
Yes, we must explain that it wasnt our doing. Besides, father wont be there, observed Ivan.
Well, I should hope not! Confound this dinner!
They all walked on, however. The monk listened in silence. On the road through the copse he made one observation howeverthat the Father Superior had been waiting a long time, and that they were more than half an hour late. He received no answer. Miüsov looked with hatred at Ivan.
Here he is, going to the dinner as though nothing had happened, he thought. A brazen face, and the conscience of a Karamazov!
Chapter VII.
A Young Man Bent on a Career
Alyosha helped Father Zossima to his bedroom and seated him on his bed. It was a little room furnished with the bare necessities. There was a narrow iron bedstead, with a strip of felt for a mattress. In the corner, under the ikons, was a readingdesk with a cross and the Gospel lying on it. The elder sank exhausted on the bed. His eyes glittered and he breathed hard. He looked intently at Alyosha, as though considering something.
Go, my dear boy, go. Porfiry is enough for me. Make haste, you are needed there, go and wait at the Father Superiors table.
Let me stay here, Alyosha entreated.
You are more needed there. There is no peace there. You will wait, and be of service. If evil spirits rise up, repeat a prayer. And remember, my sonthe elder liked to call him thatthis is not the place for you in the future. When it is Gods will to call me, leave the monastery. Go away for good.
Alyosha started.
What is it? This is not your place for the time. I bless you for great service in the world. Yours will be a long pilgrimage. And you will have to take a wife, too. You will have to bear all before you come back. There will be much to do. But I dont doubt of you, and so I send you forth. Christ is with you. Do not abandon Him and He will not abandon you. You will see great sorrow, and in that sorrow you will be happy. This is my last message to you: in sorrow seek happiness. Work, work unceasingly. Remember my words, for although I shall talk with you again, not only my days but my hours are numbered.
Alyoshas face again betrayed strong emotion. The corners of his mouth quivered.
What is it again? Father Zossima asked, smiling gently. The worldly may follow the dead with tears, but here we rejoice over the father who is departing. We rejoice and pray for him. Leave me, I must pray. Go, and make haste. Be near your brothers. And not near one only, but near both.
Father Zossima raised his hand to bless him. Alyosha could make no protest, though he had a great longing to remain. He longed, moreover, to ask the significance of his bowing to Dmitri, the question was on the tip of his tongue, but he dared not ask it. He knew that the elder would have explained it unasked if he had thought fit. But evidently it was not his will. That action had made a terrible impression on Alyosha; he believed blindly in its mysterious significance. Mysterious, and perhaps awful.
As he hastened out of the hermitage precincts to reach the monastery in time to serve at the Father Superiors dinner, he felt a sudden pang at his heart, and stopped short. He seemed to hear again Father Zossimas words, foretelling his approaching end. What he had foretold so exactly must infallibly come to pass. Alyosha believed that implicitly. But how could he be left without him? How could he live without seeing and hearing him? Where should he go? He had told him not to weep, and to leave the monastery. Good God! It was long since Alyosha had known such anguish. He hurried through the copse that divided the monastery from the hermitage, and unable to bear the burden of his thoughts, he gazed at the ancient pines beside the path. He had not far to goabout five hundred paces. He expected to meet no one at that hour, but at the first turn of the path he noticed Rakitin. He was waiting for some one.
Are you waiting for me? asked Alyosha, overtaking him.
Yes, grinned Rakitin. You are hurrying to the Father Superior, I know; he has a banquet. Theres not been such a banquet since the Superior entertained the Bishop and General Pahatov, do you remember? I shant be there, but you go and hand the sauces. Tell me one thing, Alexey, what does that vision mean? Thats what I want to ask you.
What vision?
That bowing to your brother, Dmitri. And didnt he tap the ground with his forehead, too!
You speak of Father Zossima?
Yes, of Father Zossima.
Tapped the ground?
Ah, an irreverent expression! Well, what of it? Anyway, what does that vision mean?
I dont know what it means, Misha.
I knew he wouldnt explain it to you! Theres nothing wonderful about it, of course, only the usual holy mummery. But there was an object in the performance. All the pious people in the town will talk about it and spread the story through the province, wondering what it meant. To my thinking the old man really has a keen nose; he sniffed a crime. Your house stinks of it.
What crime?
Rakitin evidently had something he was eager to speak of.
Itll be in your family, this crime. Between your brothers and your rich old father. So Father Zossima flopped down to be ready for what may turn up. If something happens later on, itll be: Ah, the holy man foresaw it, prophesied it! though its a poor sort of prophecy, flopping like that. Ah, but it was symbolic, theyll say, an allegory, and the devil knows what all! Itll be remembered to his glory: He predicted the crime and marked the criminal! Thats always the way with these crazy fanatics; they cross themselves at the tavern and throw stones at the temple. Like your elder, he takes a stick to a just man and falls at the feet of a murderer.