"You are examining my den," said Aramis. "Ah, my dear fellow, excuse me; I am lodged like a Chartreux. But what are you looking for?"
"I am looking for the person who let down the ladder. I see no one and yet the ladder didnt come down of itself."
"No, it is Bazin."
"Ah! ah!" said DArtagnan.
"But," continued Aramis, "Bazin is a well trained servant, and seeing that I was not alone he discreetly retired. Sit down, my dear friend, and let us talk." And Aramis pushed forward a large easychair, in which DArtagnan stretched himself out.
"In the first place, you will sup with me, will you not?" asked Aramis.
"Yes, if you really wish it," said DArtagnan, "and even with great pleasure, I confess; the journey has given me a devil of an appetite."
"Ah, my poor friend!" said Aramis, "you will find meagre fare; you were not expected."
"Am I then threatened with the omelet of Crevecoeur?"
"Oh, let us hope," said Aramis, "that with the help of God and of Bazin we shall find something better than that in the larder of the worthy Jesuit fathers. Bazin, my friend, come here."
The door opened and Bazin entered; on perceiving the musketeer he uttered an exclamation that was almost a cry of despair.
"My dear Bazin," said DArtagnan, "I am delighted to see with what wonderful composure you can tell a lie even in church!"
"Sir," replied Bazin, "I have been taught by the good Jesuit fathers that it is permitted to tell a falsehood when it is told in a good cause."
"So far well," said Aramis; "we are dying of hunger. Serve us up the best supper you can, and especially give us some good wine."
Bazin bowed low, sighed, and left the room.
"Now we are alone, dear Aramis," said DArtagnan, "tell me how the devil you managed to alight upon the back of Planchets horse."
"Ifaith!" answered Aramis, "as you see, from Heaven."
"From Heaven," replied DArtagnan, shaking his head; "you have no more the appearance of coming from thence than you have of going there."
"My friend," said Aramis, with a look of imbecility on his face which DArtagnan had never observed whilst he was in the musketeers, "if I did not come from Heaven, at least I was leaving Paradise, which is almost the same."
"Here, then, is a puzzle for the learned," observed DArtagnan, "until now they have never been able to agree as to the situation of Paradise; some place it on Mount Ararat, others between the rivers Tigris and Euphrates; it seems that they have been looking very far away for it, while it was actually very near. Paradise is at Noisy le Sec, upon the site of the archbishops chateau. People do not go out from it by the door, but by the window; one doesnt descend here by the marble steps of a peristyle, but by the branches of a limetree; and the angel with a flaming sword who guards this elysium seems to have changed his celestial name of Gabriel into that of the more terrestrial one of the Prince de Marsillac."
Aramis burst into a fit of laughter.
"You were always a merry companion, my dear DArtagnan," he said, "and your witty Gascon fancy has not deserted you. Yes, there is something in what you say; nevertheless, do not believe that it is Madame de Longueville with whom I am in love."
"A plague ont! I shall not do so. After having been so long in love with Madame de Chevreuse, you would hardly lay your heart at the feet of her mortal enemy!"
"Yes," replied Aramis, with an absent air; "yes, that poor duchess! I once loved her much, and to do her justice, she was very useful to us. Eventually she was obliged to leave France. He was a relentless enemy, that damned cardinal," continued Aramis, glancing at the portrait of the old minister. "He had even given orders to arrest her and would have cut off her head had she not escaped with her waitingmaidpoor Kitty! I have heard that she met with a strange adventure in I dont know what village, with I dont know what cure, of whom she asked hospitality and who, having but one chamber, and taking her for a cavalier, offered to share it with her. For she had a wonderful way of dressing as a man, that dear Marie; I know only one other woman who can do it as well. So they made this song about her: Laboissiere, dis moi. You know it, dont you?"
"No, sing it, please."
Aramis immediately complied, and sang the song in a very lively manner.
"Bravo!" cried DArtagnan, "you sing charmingly, dear Aramis. I do not perceive that singing masses has spoiled your voice."
"My dear DArtagnan," replied Aramis, "you understand, when I was a musketeer I mounted guard as seldom as I could; now when I am an abbe I say as few masses as I can. But to return to our duchess."
"Whichthe Duchess de Chevreuse or the Duchess de Longueville?"
"Have I not already told you that there is nothing between me and the Duchess de Longueville? Little flirtations, perhaps, and thats all. No, I spoke of the Duchess de Chevreuse; did you see her after her return from Brussels, after the kings death?"
"Yes, she is still beautiful."
"Yes," said Aramis, "I saw her also at that time. I gave her good advice, by which she did not profit. I ventured to tell her that Mazarin was the lover of Anne of Austria. She wouldnt believe me, saying that she knew Anne of Austria, who was too proud to love such a worthless coxcomb. After that she plunged into the cabal headed by the Duke of Beaufort; and the coxcomb arrested De Beaufort and banished Madame de Chevreuse."
"You know," resumed DArtagnan, "that she has had leave to return to France?"
"Yes she is come back and is going to commit some fresh folly or another."
"Oh, but this time perhaps she will follow your advice."
"Oh, this time," returned Aramis, "I havent seen her; she is much changed."
"In that respect unlike you, my dear Aramis, for you are still the same; you have still your beautiful dark hair, still your elegant figure, still your feminine hands, which are admirably suited to a prelate."
"Yes," replied Aramis, "I am extremely careful of my appearance. Do you know that I am growing old? I am nearly thirtyseven."
"Mind, Aramis"DArtagnan smiled as he spoke"since we are together again, let us agree on one point: what age shall we be in future?"
"How?"
"Formerly I was your junior by two or three years, and if I am not mistaken I am turned forty years old."
"Indeed! Then tis I who am mistaken, for you have always been a good chronologist. By your reckoning I must be fortythree at least. The devil I am! Dont let it out at the Hotel Rambouillet; it would ruin me," replied the abbe.
"Dont be afraid," said DArtagnan. "I never go there."
"Why, what in the world," cried Aramis, "is that animal Bazin doing? Bazin! Hurry up there, you rascal; we are mad with hunger and thirst!"
Bazin entered at that moment carrying a bottle in each hand.
"At last," said Aramis, "we are ready, are we?"
"Yes, monsieur, quite ready," said Bazin; "but it took me some time to bring up all the"
"Because you always think you have on your shoulders your beadles robe, and spend all your time reading your breviary. But I give you warning that if in polishing your chapel utensils you forget how to brighten up my sword, I will make a great fire of your blessed images and will see that you are roasted on it."
Bazin, scandalized, made a sign of the cross with the bottle in his hand. DArtagnan, more surprised than ever at the tone and manners of the Abbe dHerblay, which contrasted so strongly with those of the Musketeer Aramis, remained staring with wideopen eyes at the face of his friend.
Bazin quickly covered the table with a damask cloth and arranged upon it so many things, gilded, perfumed, appetizing, that DArtagnan was quite overcome.
"But you expected some one then?" asked the officer.
"Oh," said Aramis, "I always try to be prepared; and then I knew you were seeking me."
"From whom?"
"From Master Bazin, to be sure; he took you for the devil, my dear fellow, and hastened to warn me of the danger that threatened my soul if I should meet again a companion so wicked as an officer of musketeers."
"Oh, monsieur!" said Bazin, clasping his hands supplicatingly.
"Come, no hypocrisy! you know that I dont like it. You will do much better to open the window and let down some bread, a chicken and a bottle of wine to your friend Planchet, who has been this last hour killing himself clapping his hands."
Planchet, in fact, had bedded and fed his horses, and then coming back under the window had repeated two or three times the signal agreed upon.
Bazin obeyed, fastened to the end of a cord the three articles designated and let them down to Planchet, who then went satisfied to his shed.
"Now to supper," said Aramis.
The two friends sat down and Aramis began to cut up fowls, partridges and hams with admirable skill.
"The deuce!" cried DArtagnan; "do you live in this way always?"
"Yes, pretty well. The coadjutor has given me dispensations from fasting on the jours maigres, on account of my health; then I have engaged as my cook the cook who lived with Lafolloneyou know the man I mean?the friend of the cardinal, and the famous epicure whose grace after dinner used to be, Good Lord, do me the favor to cause me to digest what I have eaten."
"Nevertheless he died of indigestion, in spite of his grace," said DArtagnan.
"What can you expect?" replied Aramis, in a tone of resignation. "Every man thats born must fulfil his destiny."
"If it be not an indelicate question," resumed DArtagnan, "have you grown rich?"
"Oh, Heaven! no. I make about twelve thousand francs a year, without counting a little benefice of a thousand crowns the prince gave me."
"And how do you make your twelve thousand francs? By your poems?"
"No, I have given up poetry, except now and then to write a drinking song, some gay sonnet or some innocent epigram; I compose sermons, my friend."
"What! sermons? Do you preach them?"
"No; I sell them to those of my cloth who wish to become great orators."
"Ah, indeed! and you have not been tempted by the hopes of reputation yourself?"
"I should, my dear DArtagnan, have been so, but nature said No. When I am in the pulpit, if by chance a pretty woman looks at me, I look at her again: if she smiles, I smile too. Then I speak at random; instead of preaching about the torments of hell I talk of the joys of Paradise. An event took place in the Church of St. Louis au Marais. A gentleman laughed in my face. I stopped short to tell him that he was a fool; the congregation went out to get stones to stone me with, but whilst they were away I found means to conciliate the priests who were present, so that my foe was pelted instead of me. Tis true that he came the next morning to my house, thinking that he had to do with an abbelike all other abbes."