Ben shrugged. I have good days and bad days. The cold touch of the Brownings muzzle against his brow was still a fresh memory.
What happened? Charlie asked after another long silence.
I dont really want to talk about it.
Charlie looked pained. Let me get you a drink. Shit, this is terrible. I was going to ask you something, but now I dont -
Its fine. Ask. What is it?
Lets talk in private. See if we can find somewhere quiet.
Ben followed him across the lawn to the marquee, through the crowds of people talking and sipping champagne. A lot of guests, he commented.
Mostly Rhondas side, Charlie said. I hardly know anybody, outside of the regiment. And Rhonda didnt want army people here. He rolled his eyes.
Thats your brother over there, isnt it?
Charlie stared at him in amazement. It must be seven years since you last saw Vince. And he doesnt even look anything like me. How the hell did you recognise him?
I never forget a face, Ben said with a smile.
You certainly dont.
By the marquee, a waiter was offering drinks from a silver tray on a table. He handed Ben and Charlie a glass of champagne each.
Ben shook his head and pointed. The bottle.
The waiter stared for a second, then set down the glasses, took a fresh bottle from the ice and passed it over. Ben grabbed it with one hand and scooped up a couple of crystal champagne flutes with the other. He and Charlie walked away from the throng and the chatter. He sensed that Charlie didnt want anyone listening to what he had to say.
The waiter stared for a second, then set down the glasses, took a fresh bottle from the ice and passed it over. Ben grabbed it with one hand and scooped up a couple of crystal champagne flutes with the other. He and Charlie walked away from the throng and the chatter. He sensed that Charlie didnt want anyone listening to what he had to say.
They sat on the steps of a gazebo, a little way from the reception. Ben popped open the bottle and poured them each a glass.
Youre sure youre OK with this? Charlie said nervously. I mean, under the circumstances -
Ben handed him a glass and took a long drink from his own. Im listening, he said. Go ahead.
Charlie nodded. He took a deep breath and then came straight out with it. Ive got some problems, Ben.
What kind of problems?
Nothing like that, Charlie said, catching his look. Like I said, Rhonda and I are happy together, everythings cool in that department.
So is it money?
In the distance, the band started up a version of String of Pearls.
Charlie made a resigned gesture. What else? Im out of work.
You left the regiment?
Just over a year ago. Fourteen months. Rhonda wanted me out. She was scared Id get myself killed in Afghanistan or somewhere.
Thats fairly understandable.
Well, it nearly did happen. More than once. So, what the hell, its civvy street for me now. Problem is, Im no damn use in it. I cant hold down a job. Ive had four since I left.
Its a common problem, Ben said. Hard to adapt, after the things weve seen and done.
Charlie took a long drink of champagne. Ben reached for the bottle and topped up his glass. We bought a house a while ago, Charlie went on. Just a small place, but you know what property prices are, and this is hardly the cheapest part of the country. Even a bloody cottage is worth half a mil these days. Rhondas folks put up a deposit for us as an engagement gift, but we still can hardly keep up with the mortgage payments. Its killing me. Im just drowning. I dont know what Im going to do.
What about Rhonda? Does she work?
For an aid charity. It doesnt pay much.
Plenty of desk jobs in the army. Why dont you apply?
Charlie shook his head. Theyd go crazy if I went anywhere near that again. Scared Id be tempted back into active service. God knows I probably would be, too. Rhondas dad made his money selling mobile ringtones. Wants me to go and work for him. Hes putting a lot of pressure on me. The whole family is. I mean, fucking ringtones. Can you imagine?
Ben smiled. Maybe you should go for it. Sounds cushy and lucrative. And safer than getting shot at.
I wouldnt last long, Charlie said. It would put a strain on the marriage. He took another long gulp of champagne.
I didnt bring you a wedding present, Ben said. If itll help, I can give you some money instead. I could write you a cheque today.
No way. Thats not what I want.
Then you could consider it a loan. Until you get on your feet.
No. I wanted to ask you something else.
Ben nodded. I think I know what. You want to ask me about working together.
Charlie let out a long sigh. OK, Ill be frank with you. How is the kidnap and ransom business doing these days?
Better than ever, Ben said. Snatching people and holding them for ransom is a growth industry.
I was talking about your end of the business.
Theres always call for people like me, Ben said. Involving the police is nearly always a bad move. K and R insurance agents and most of the official negotiators are just nerds in suits. People in trouble need an extra option.
And youre it.
And you want to be part of it?
You know Id be good, Charlie said. But I cant just set up on my own. I dont know anything about it. Id need some training. Youre the best teacher I ever had. If I was going into something like that, Id want to work for you.
From what you tell me, I dont think your new family would approve.
Id tell them I was a security consultant. It cant be as dangerous as what weve seen in the regiment, can it?
Ben said nothing. Both their glasses were empty, and the sun was beating down. He poured out the last of the champagne and set the bottle down with a heavy clunk of glass on concrete. Problem is, I cant help you, he said. If I could, I would. But Im out. Retired. Im sorry.
Retired? Really?
Ben nodded. It had been his promise to her, the day shed said she would marry him. Since the end of last year. Its all over for me.
Charlie sank back against the steps of the gazebo, deflating. You have any contacts?
Ben shook his head. I never did. I always worked alone. Everything was strictly word of mouth. He finished his drink. Like I said. If its money I can help.
I cant take money from you, Charlie said. Rhonda can ask her folks to bail us out any time, and they probably would. But we see this as our responsibility. Our problem. We need to deal with it ourselves. I was just hoping -
Im sorry. Theres really no way.
Charlie grimaced with disappointment. But if you hear of anything going, youll let me know?
I would, but it wont happen. I told you, Im out of it.
Charlie sighed again. Im sorry I brought this up. He paused a long time, watching the people dancing and having fun in the distance. So what are you going to do next?
Im going back to Oxford. Im heading there right after this. Ive already rented a flat there.
Whats in Oxford?
The University, Ben said. Im going there to study.
You, a student? To do what?
To finish what I started before I went crazy and joined the army almost twenty years ago. Theology.
Charlies eyes opened wide. Theology? You want to be a priest?
Ben smiled. Reverend. Once upon a time, thats all I wanted to be. Seemed like the perfect life.
So you went off to war instead. Makes sense.
Sometimes things dont work out the way you think, Ben said. It just happened that way. Now Ive come full circle. The time is right for me. They let me back in to finish my course. One year to go, then I can start thinking about entering the Church, just like Id planned years ago. He slapped his hands on his knees. So thats it.
Charlie was staring at him in disbelief. Youre kidding me. Youre winding me up.
Im serious.
This just doesnt seem like you. I still have this image of you that time with the tank, in the desert? We were pinned under fire, you only had three rounds left. Ive never seen anything like it. Guys in the regiment, guys who never met you, still talk about it -
Well, I dont want to talk about it, Ben said, cutting him off. Whatever I did in the past, whatever I was or wanted to be, thats finished. Im tired, Charlie. Im thirty-eight years old and all Ive ever known is violence and killing. I want a life of peace.
A dog collar and a little cottage, with a Bible in your hand.
Ben nodded. Thats it. About as far away from the past as I can get.
I cant see it.
Maybe Ill surprise you.
Maybe Ill surprise you.
I should have waited a while, Charlie said. He laughed. You could have married us.
They hadnt noticed Rhonda striding across the lawn towards them. They stood up as she approached. She was tall and slender, with reddish hair that looked as though shed coloured it with henna. She had a stud in her nose. A bohemian kind of look that contrasted with the high heels and the expensive dress she was wearing. She was pretty, but Ben thought he could see a hardened look behind the eyes. There was suspicion in them as Charlie introduced her to him.
Heard all about you, she said, looking him up and down. Major Benedict Hope. The wild one. I know all the stories. Really impressed.
Im not Major Hope. Im just Ben. Forget the stories.
Well, Ben, I suppose youre here to talk my husband into joining you on some -
I invited him here, Charlie said. Remember?
She looked up hotly at Ben. I dont want him getting mixed up in anything dangerous.
Im the last person who would get him into any kind of danger, Ben said. You can trust me on that.
She snorted. Yeah, right. Now, can I have my husband back, please? And someone over there wants to meet you.
Ben followed the direction of her pointing finger and his gaze landed on a stunningly attractive woman standing over by the marquee. She was waving coyly, smiling in their direction.
Thats Mandy Latham, Rhonda said. Her parents own half of Shropshire. Deliciously nouveau riche even worse than my lot. Winters at Verbier, drives a Lambo. Shes been asking me who the gorgeous, tall, blond, blue-eyed guy with Charlie is.
Hes going to be a priest, Charlie said.
Why dont you go and ask her to dance? Rhonda snapped at Ben.
Rhonda -, Charlie started.
I dont dance, Ben said. He smiled at Charlie. Nice party. See you around. He walked away.