Cathy put down the newspaper and smiled across the hospital solarium at her three friends. Well, guys. Arent you lucky to be here in sunny California and not freezing your you-know-whats off in Washington.
Are you kidding? groused Polowski. Id give anything to be in on those hearings right now. Instead of hooked up to all these-these doohickeys. He gave his intravenous line a tug, clanging a bottle against the pole.
Patience, Sam, said Milo. Youll get to Washington.
Ha! Hollands already told em the good stuff. By the time they get around to hearing my testimony, itll be back-page news.
I dont think so, said Cathy. I think itll be front-page news for a long time to come. She turned and looked out the window at the sunshine glistening on the grass. A long time to come. Thats how long it would be before shed see Victor again. If ever. Three weeks had already passed since shed last laid eyes on him. Via Jay Wallace in Washington, shed heard that it was like a shark-feeding whenever Victor appeared in public, mobs of reporters and federal attorneys and Justice Department officials. No one could get near him.
Not even me, she thought.
It had been a comfort, having these three new friends to talk to. Ollie had bounced back quickly and was discharged-or kicked out, as Milo put it-a mere eight days after being shot. Polowski had had a rougher time of it. Post-operative infections, plus a bad case of smoke inhalation, had prolonged his stay to the point that every day was another trial of frustration for him. He wanted out. He wanted back on the beat.
He wanted a real, honest-to-God cheeseburger and a cigarette.
One more week, the doctors said.
At least theres an end to his waiting in sight, Cathy thought. I dont know when Ill see or hear from Victor again.
The silence was to be expected, Polowski had told her. Sequestration of witnesses. Protective custody. The Justice Department wanted an airtight case, and for that it would keep its star witness incommunicado. For the rest of them, depositions had been sufficient. Cathy had given her testimony two weeks before. Afterward, theyd told her she was free to leave town any time she wished.
Now she had a plane ticket to Mexico in her purse.
She was through with waiting for telephone calls, through with wondering whether he loved her or missed her. Shed been through this before with Jack, the doubts, the fears, the slow but inevitable realization that something was wrong. She knew enough not to be hurt again, not this way.
At least, out of all this pain, Ive discovered three new friends. Ollie and Polowski and Milo, the most unlikely trio on the face of the earth.
Look, Sam, said Milo, reaching into his backpack. We brought ya something.
No more hula-girl boxer shorts, okay? Caught hell from the nurses for that one.
Naw. Its something for your lungs. To remind you to breathe deep.
Cigarettes? Polowski asked hopefully.
Milo grinned and held up his gift. A kazoo!
I really needed one.
You really do need it, said Ollie, opening up his clarinet case. Seeing as we brought our instruments today and we werent about to leave you out of this particular gig.
Youre not serious.
What better place to perform? said Milo, giving his piccolo a quick and loving rubdown. All these sick, depressed patients lying around, in need of a bit of cheering up. Some good music.
Some peace and quiet! Polowski turned pleading eyes to Cathy. Theyre not serious.
She looked him in the eye and took out her kazoo. Dead serious.
Okay, guys, said Ollie. Hit it!
Never before had the world heard such a rendering of California, Here I Come! And, if the world was lucky, never again. By the time theyd played the last note, nurses and patients had spilled into the solarium to check on the source of that terrible screeching.
Mr. Polowski! said the head nurse. If your visitors cant behave-
Youll throw em out? asked Polowski hopefully.
No need, said Ollie. Were packing up the pipes. By the way, folks, were available for private parties, birthdays, cocktail hours. Just get in touch with our business manager- at this, Milo smiled and waved -to set up your own special performance.
Polowski groaned, I want to go back to bed.
Not yet, said the nurse. You need the extra stimulation. Then, with a sly wink at Ollie, she turned and whisked out of the room.
Well, said Cathy. I think Ive done my part to cheer you up. Now its time I hit the road.
Polowski looked at her in astonishment. Youre leaving me with these lunatics?
Have to. I have a plane to catch.
Where you going?
Mexico. Jack called to say theyre shooting already. So I thought Id get on down there and whip up a few monsters.
What about Victor?
What about him?
I thought-that is- Polowski looked at Ollie and Milo. Both men merely shrugged. Hes going to miss you.
I dont think so. She turned once again to gaze out the window. Below, in the walkway, an old woman sat in a wheelchair, her wan face turned gratefully to the sun. Soon Cathy would be enjoying that very sunshine, somewhere on a Mexican beach.
By their silence, she knew the three men didnt know what to say. After all, Victor was their friend, as well. They couldnt defend or condemn him. Neither could she. She simply loved him, in ways that made her decision to leave all the more right. Shed been in love before, she knew that the very worst thing a woman can sense in a man is indifference.
She didnt want to be around to see it inVictors eyes.
Gathering up her purse, she said, Guys, I guess this is it.
Ollie shook his head. I really wish youd hang around. Hell be back any day. Besides, you cant break up our great little quartet.
Sam can take my place on the kazoo.
No way, said Polowski.
She planted a kiss on his balding head. Get better. The country needs you.
Polowski sighed. Im glad somebody does.
Ill write you from Mexico! She slung her purse over her shoulder and turned. One step was all she managed before she halted in astonishment.
Victor was standing in the doorway, a suitcase in hand. He cocked his head. Whats this about Mexico?
She couldnt answer. She just kept staring at him, thinking how unfair it was that the man she was trying so hard to escape should look so heartbreakingly wonderful.
You got back just in time, said Ollie. Shes leaving.
What? Victor dropped his suitcase and stared at her in dismay. Only then did she notice his wrinkled clothes, the day-old growth of beard shadowing his face. The toe of a sock poked out from a corner of the closed suitcase.
You cant be leaving, he said.
She cleared her throat. It was unexpected. Jack needs me.
Did something happen? Is there some emergency?
No, its just that theyre filming and, oh, things are a royal mess on the set She glanced at her watch, a gesture designed to speed her escape. Look, Ill miss my plane. I promise Ill give you a call when I get to-
Youre not his only makeup artist.
No, but-
He can do the movie without you.
Yes, but-
Do you want to leave? Is that it?
She didnt answer. She could only look at him mutely, the anguish showing plainly in her eyes.
Gently, firmly, he took her hand. Excuse us, guys, he said to the others. The lady and I are going for a walk.
Outside, leaves blew across the brown winter lawn. They walked beneath a row of oak trees, through patches of sun and shadow. Suddenly he stopped and pulled her around to face him.
Tell me now, he said. What gave you this crazy idea of leaving?
She looked down. I didnt think it made much difference to you.
Wouldnt make a difference? Cathy, I was climbing the walls! Thinking of ways to get out of that hotel room and back to you! You have no idea how I worried. I wondered if you were safe-if this whole crazy mess was really over. The lawyers wouldnt let me call out, not until the hearings were finished. I did manage to sneak out and call Milos house. No one answered.
We were probably here, visiting Sam.
And I was going crazy. They had me answering the same damn questions over and over again. And all I could think of was how much I missed you. He shook his head. First chance I got, I flew the coop. And got snowed in for hours in Chicago. But I made it. Im here. Just in time, it seems. Gently he took her by the shoulders. Now. Tell me. Are you still flying off to Jack?
Im not leaving for Jack. Im leaving for myself. Because I know this wont work.
Cathy, after what weve been through together, we can make anything work.
Not-not this.
Slowly he let his hands drop, but his gaze remained on her face. That night we made love, he said softly. That didnt tell you something?
But it wasnt me you were making love to! You were thinking of Lily-
Lily? He shook his head in bewilderment. Where does she come in?
You loved her so much-
And you loved Jack once. Remember?
I fell out of love. You never did. No matter how much I try, Ill never measure up to her. I wont be smart enough or kind enough-
Cathy, stop.
I wont be her.
I dont want you to be her! I want the woman wholl hang off fire escapes with me and-and drag me off the `side of the road. I want the woman who saved my life. The woman who calls herself average. The woman who doesnt know just how extraordinary she really is. He took her face in his hands and tilted it up to his. Yes, Lily was a wonderful woman. She was wise and kind and caring. But she wasnt you. And she and I-we werent the perfect couple. I used to think it was my fault, that if I were just a better lover-
Youre a wonderful lover, Victor.
No. Dont you see, its you. You bring it out in me. All the want and need. He pulled her face close to his and his voice dropped to a whisper. When you and I made love that night, it was like the very first time for me. No, it was even better. Because I loved you.
And I loved you, she whispered.
He pulled her into his arms and kissed her, his fingers burrowing deep into her hair. Cathy, Cathy, he murmured. Weve been so busy trying to stay alive we havent had time to say all the things we should have
His arms suddenly stiffened as a startling round of applause erupted above them. They looked up. Three grinning faces peered down at them from a hospital balcony.