Thenshe felt him. Felt his mouth, silky soft on the surface, firm underneaththe warm, shocked puff of his breath, the solid bulk of his shoulders beneath her balled-up fists. And his response-she hadnt expected that.
She felt a moment of panicthought, I should stop this! And discovered she didnt want to-for a number of different reasons. To keep from having to think about the bombshell that had just been dropped on her. But mostlybecause it just felt so damn good.
Such a hard-looking man, and yetWho wouldve thought he would feel so good?
She would have liked to go on kissing him a considerable while longer, but obviously he didnt share her desire. She became aware of his hands on her waist, felt them linger there a momentthen move with purpose to her shoulders. The pressure on her shoulders was gentle persuasion, at first, and his mouth still clung to hers in a way more wistful than hungry. Knowing what was coming, she made a soft, whimpering sound of protest, but his hands had already moved on to her arms, slipped along them until he could grasp her wrists. Before he could humiliate her completely by pulling her hands free of his collar, she gave up her grip and jerked away from him, furious and shaken. She would have fled, then, but hed probably anticipated that, because he didnt let go of her wrists. And for a few seconds they looked at each other across their locked hands, both breathing hard.
Holts eyes narrowed, and he said thickly, You want to tell me what that was about?
She lifted her chin and lowered her lashes, and injected her voice with a seductive bravado she was far from feeling. Dont tell me you hadnt thought about it.
He gave her a sideways, wary look. Uhactually, no, I hadnt.
Liar. But he went on looking at her, saying nothing. She felt cold and queasy. She knew her smile was congealing fast, and it was only pride that enabled her to produce a nice little pout and accompanying puff of laughter to go with it. Okay, I think my feelings are hurt.
They shouldnt be, he said dryly, believe me. Its just against my principles to hit on my clients relatives-or a woman whos emotionally vulnerable, for that matter. He gave a sharp little laugh and gallantly added, But you sure dont make it easy.
She bit her lower lip as she smiled up at him and turned her wrists experimentally in his grasp. You didnt hit on me, I hit on you. And who says Im emotionally vulnerable?
He made a sound that was more snort than laugh and let go of her wrists abruptly, as if hed just realized he was still holding them.
And it was only when he was no longer touching her, when she couldnt feel the warmth of his body and the strength of his hands, that Billie realized how much shed been depending on those things-on him-for support. Now, without it, she felt herself trembling inside and didnt know how to stop. To her horror, she realized that what she wanted more than anything at that moment was for Holt to put his arms around her and hold her tight. She wanted to press her face against his chest and gather his shirt in her fists and breathe in the comforting scent of him.
Instead, she folded her arms across her chilled body, supplying herself with the hug she needed, and turned her back to him, preempting the rejection she knew was coming.
Oh nowhere are my glasses? I feel so naked
She would die before shed ask Holt Kincaid to give them back to her, but
You better do something about those eyes, Miley always told me, back when he first started teaching me to play poker. Youre never gonna be a successful card player unless you cover those eyes. Every thought in your head is right there in your eyes.
So it was just some kind of weird emotional reaction, she said stiffly, without turning. Im over it, okay?
Billie-Bren-
She made a sharp gesture, cutting him off. Look, I just came to tell you so you can go tell your client-Corywhatever-that you found me. Okay? So its over-case closed. Now you just go away. Leave me alone.
Just like that? His voice was soft now, and came from close behind her. A shiver ran down her back for no good reason. Dont you want to meet them? Theyre your family, Brenna.
I told you-its Billie. Thats who I am now. You got that? She flung that at him over one shoulder as she moved away from him. Family? Look, if you met my sister Brooke, you have to know about me and family. Theres no way in hell Im ever going back there. You can-
Hes dead, Billie.
What? A small gasp followed the word, as if the spoken response had been automatic, and the shock a delayed reaction that came after.
Holt said it again, gently. Your brother. Hes dead.
When she slowly turned toward him, he watched her face, vulnerable and naked as a childs. Saw bewilderment, first, then something feral and raw he couldnt put a name to.
How? She whispered it, suspicious and wary. When?
He was killed in a car crash a couple of years ago. Your parents, too. Im sorry
But she had her defenses back in place now, and she hitched one shoulder only slightly as she turned away. Hey-Im sorry about my parents, she said gruffly. Then she went utterly still, and her voice seemed to come from somewhere else entirely-disembodied and devoid of emotion. As for my brotherif theres a God, and any justice at all, hes in hell, right where he belongs.
He was killed in a car crash a couple of years ago. Your parents, too. Im sorry
But she had her defenses back in place now, and she hitched one shoulder only slightly as she turned away. Hey-Im sorry about my parents, she said gruffly. Then she went utterly still, and her voice seemed to come from somewhere else entirely-disembodied and devoid of emotion. As for my brotherif theres a God, and any justice at all, hes in hell, right where he belongs.
Dont you want to know about your sister? Standing behind her, he watched her raise one hand to her face and wondered if she was wiping away tears, or perhaps feeling for the sunglasses that werent there. Brookes had-
She made a quick, jerky motion with the hand that had touched her face. Cleared her throat and said huskily, I know about Brooke. It was on the news-about her getting arrested for killing her husband, and the mountain lion and all that.
Then you know-
I know shes okay, that shes got a kid. She looks good-looks like shes doing okay. She whirled on him, suddenly, her face flushed and angry. Look, what do you want me to say?
Her sunglasses were in his shirt pocket. She looked so defenseless he was tempted to give them back to her, but instead he folded his arms over the pocket and the glasses and said softly, Shes got a new man in her life-a good man. I imagine shed love to tell you about himseems like the kind of thing sisters do. He paused. Shes dying to see you, Billie. Brenna. She misses you.
She turned her head and stared hard at nothing. He could see her throat work as she swallowed.
And you have three brothers-real brothers, good, decent men, all of them. You have a family.
Her eyes came back to him, bright with anger, and her lips curved in a smile of derision. Family? You say that like thats supposed to be something great, right? Look, as far as Im concerned, families are the reason for most of whats gone wrong in this world.
Come on, Billie.
Dont. Okay? Dont give me pretty speeches, because you just dont know. Her eyes were shimmering, fire and rain, although no tears fell. She paced a step closer to him, one hand upraised. When I was on the street, all those other kids who were out there with me-why do you think they were there? Guess what? They had families. Families that sucked. Moms on drugs, dads on boozeI knew kids that had to leave home to get something to eat, or to keep from getting raped, beat up-or worse.
Nobody said all families are perfect, Holt said evenly. All the more reason to be grateful when youve got a good one. And youve definitely got that. Now.
Yeah? So you say. She paused, studying him thoughtfully, lips still curved in that mocking little smile. What about you, Kincaid? You got a family? A good one?
She was good at reading faces, and his was kindergarten-easy. Once again she didnt miss the slight flinching around his eyes when he replied.
No. No family.
None? She jerked back in feigned surprise, and inside she was gleefultriumphant. Aha-gotcha. So you have a skeleton or two in your family cupboard, Holt Kincaid. Come on. No parents? No brothers and sisters? Nobody? She felt no guilt for taunting him. As far as she was concerned he deserved it for making her expose her emotions so cruelly.
Tight-lipped, showing none of his, he shook his head. I was raised by my great-aunt, but shes gone now.
Really. She watched him narrowly, her head tilted to one side. Sowhat happened to your parents?
He didnt reply, and his eyes had gone flat and gray as stones.
She stepped closer, and touched one of the arms that criss-crossed his chest. That, too, seemed hard as stone, but seemed to vibrate from some force deep within, and when she touched it, she felt the same vibration inside her own chest.
She looked up at him. HmmSo what was it? They die? Abandon you? Come on, Kincaid, Ill bet theres one helluva story there.
I dont know you well enough to tell you that story, he said coldly, looking down at her without lowering his head so that his eyes were hidden by his lashes. His lips looked stiff and uninviting.
How could I ever have kissed them?
How could they have felt so good?
A shudder ran through her, and she shrugged to hide it. She went on smiling, too, although she was seething inside.
I thinkI hate you, Kincaid. Nobody makes me cry-nobody. But you came close. Ill make you pay for that.
She didnt know how, but she would find out what his story was, where he was most vulnerable. And she would make him pay.
And in the meantime, she still had an ace or two to play.
Thats easily remedied, she murmured, swaying seductively as she moved even closer to him, letting her hand slide upward along his arm, feeling the shape of warm, firm muscle beneath soft cotton.
Holt grasped her wrist hard. He couldnt seem to stop his bodys response to her touch; all he could hope for was to keep her from feeling it. His smile felt hard and mean, but what else could he do? It was the only defense he had.
He hadnt expected this. Hadnt expected to be so attracted to her. Not just physically-he was confident he could have handled that easily enough-but in ways he couldnt explain. Ways that made him feel weak and vulnerable, even while some masculine instinct deep inside him kept wanting to protect and defend her.