They munched in silence for a while. Then the radio crackled out their call sign and a voice they recognized as Bonnicks said, Report your position.
Shit, said Maycock.
No sweat, said Jennison.
He switched on his transmitter and said, Were in the Avenue, Sarge. Checking out an unsecured property.
The Avenue? Which Avenue? demanded Bonnick, sounding irritated. Use proper procedure, full details when reporting location.
Jennison grinned at his partner and replied mildly, Just the Avenue, Sarge. In Greenhill. Thought everyone knew that. The propertys called Moscow House. Its on the left-hand side as youre heading east, about one hundred and five metres from the junction with Balmoral Terrace. Theres a name on the gate pillar. Moscow House. Thats M, O, S, C, O, W. Moscow. H, O, U, S, E. House. Bit misty out here but if you get lost, theres one or two helpful young ladies around wholl be glad to show you the way. Over.
There was silence, though in his mind Maycock could hear police constables pissing themselves laughing all over Mid-Yorkshire.
Report back to me as soon as your checks finished. Out, said the sergeant in a quiet controlled voice.
Think youve made a friend there, said Maycock.
He can please his bloody self.
Aye, but wed best do what youve told him were doing, said Maycock, getting out of the car. Come on. Lets take a look.
Ive not finished me cod yet! protested Jennison.
But to tell the truth his appetite was fading. For Joker Jennison had a secret. He was scared of the dark, and particularly scared of old dark houses. His fear was metaphysical rather than physical. Muscular muggers and crazy crack-heads he took in his stride. But in his infancy he couldnt sleep without a night-light and as a teenager hed fainted while watching The Rocky Horror Picture Show. On reviving and realizing the damage this was likely to do to his street cred, he had faked every symptom of every illness he could think of, causing a meningitis scare in his school and getting him confined to an isolation ward in the infirmary while they did tests. It had worked as far as his mates were concerned, but on joining the police force (which itself had been an act of denial), he had soon realized that if he fainted every time he had to enter a deserted property with only his torch for light, pretence of illness would get him thrown out as quickly as admission of terror. So he had learned to grit his teeth and keep his true feelings hidden behind the screen of pleasantries that got him his nickname.
Now he remained stubbornly in his seat as his partner mounted the steps to the open door. Moscow House seemed to grow in bulk as he watched, towering high into the swirling mist where it wasnt hard for his straining eyes to detect ruined battlements around which flitted squeaking bats.
Then the mist came rolling down the dark facade as if bent on putting a curtain between himself and Alan Maycock.
Oh shit, said Jennison again. What was worse, out here alone or in there with his partner?
That part of his mind still in touch with reason told him that if anything happened to Maycock hed have to go into the house anyway.
With a sigh of desperation, he rolled his bulk out of the car, crushed the remnants of his fish supper into a ball and hurled it into the darkness, then jogged towards the house shouting, Hang about, you daft bugger. Im coming!
5
What do they put these things in with? Sledgehammers? snarled Cressida Maciver, gripping the bottle between her knees and hauling at the corkscrew with both hands.
Oh shit, said Jennison again. What was worse, out here alone or in there with his partner?
That part of his mind still in touch with reason told him that if anything happened to Maycock hed have to go into the house anyway.
With a sigh of desperation, he rolled his bulk out of the car, crushed the remnants of his fish supper into a ball and hurled it into the darkness, then jogged towards the house shouting, Hang about, you daft bugger. Im coming!
5
What do they put these things in with? Sledgehammers? snarled Cressida Maciver, gripping the bottle between her knees and hauling at the corkscrew with both hands.
Ellie Pascoe smiled uneasily and glanced at her watch. Half-eight, two empty bottles lying on the floor, and they hadnt even eaten yet. Nor could her sensitive nose detect any evidence of food in preparation wafting from the kitchen, and Cress was one of those cooks who couldnt scramble an egg without sprinkling it with spices.
But it wasnt the thought of going hungry that caused her unease. It was the fact that on a couple of previous occasions, even with food, the opening of a third bottle had been closely followed by an attempt at seduction which came close to sexual assault. After the second time, Ellie had been ready with various stratagems to pre-empt the well-signalled pounce, and though their farewell hug sometimes came close to frottage, she had managed to escape without damage. Sober, next time they met, Cress seemed to have forgotten everything in the same way that, drunk, she clearly had no recollection of Ellies having confided in her that once, at university, curiosity and a determination not to appear repressed or naive had got her into a female lecturers bed, but the experience had done nothing for her and wasnt one she had any desire to repeat.
Usually she got a taxi home, but when her husband, Detective Chief Inspector Peter Pascoe had announced theyd need a baby-sitter as piles of neglected paperwork were going to keep him at his desk deep into the evening, shed declared that what they lost on the sitter they could gain on the taxi and arranged for him to pick her up about ten-thirty, which was the usual danger time. Now the schedule was blown to hell, and as well as uneasy, Ellie felt cheated. She was very fond of Cress, and in matters of taste generally, politics sufficiently, and humour absolutely, they shared so much that their evenings together before the hormones took over were a delight which tonight looked like being cut well short.
The assaults always occurred when Cressida was between men, which was pretty frequently. The intensity of her commitment was more than most could abide for long. The journey from feeling adored and cosseted to feeling cribbed, cabined and confined was a short one, in some cases taking only a matter of days. In the aftermath of break-up, Cressida always turned to her female friends for comfort. Men were only good for one thing, and that was overrated. Passion was for pubescents. Female friendship was the thing. Which sensible life-view ruled her mind until the opening of the third bottle, when a meeting of mature female minds was suddenly discarded in favour of a close encounter of mature female flesh.
The last break-up seemed to have been even more than usually traumatic.
I really liked the guy, she bewailed. He had everything. And I mean everything. Including a Maserati. Have you ever had sex in a Maserati, Ellie?
Ellie pursed her lips as if running though a check list of top cars, then admitted shed missed out.
Never mind, said her friend consolingly. The driving positions fabulous but the shagging positions absolute agony. But you wouldnt believe a guy driving a car like that would turn out to have five kids and a religion that wont let his wife entertain the idea of divorce.
Her eyes glinted malevolently.
Maybe if I had a word with his wife that would change her religion, she added.
Cress, you wouldnt.
Of course I wouldnt. Not unless provoked. And why the hell am I wasting quality time with my dearest friend talking about that sunburnt shit of a witch doctor?
She gave a mighty heave at the corkscrew and succeeded in hauling it out of the bottle, but only at the expense of leaving half the cork in the neck.
Oh well, that should delay matters a little, thought Ellie, offering up a prayer of thanks to whatever it was that almost certainly wasnt there.
As if to reproach her for this qualification in her devotion, the phone rang.
Shit, said Cressida. See what you can do with this sodding thing, will you?
As soon as she left the room, Ellie pulled out her mobile and pressed her husbands speed-dial key. He answered almost immediately.
Peter, she whispered. Its me.
What? Its a lousy line.
Just listen. I need you earlier.
Ah, he said. Second bottle time already, eh?
He was quick. That was one of the good things about him. One of many good things.
Third, she said. No sign of food and shes been dumped again. Some medic. Shes started on about the problems of sex in a Maserati.
Poor thing. Cant you tell her youve got a headache? Always works with me.
Ha ha. Can you get here soon? Say its some problem with the sitter.
Im on my way. Fifteen minutes tops. Hang in there, girl.
Shed just got the phone into her bag when Cressida came back into the room.
Sue-Lynn, she said. My sister-in-law. Wants to know if Ive heard from Pal. Seems he didnt turn up for his squash with Jase and nobody knows where he is. Silly bitch.
In the five years of their friendship, shed never talked in any detail about her family, not even her brother Pal with whom she was close and whod been indirectly responsible for bringing Ellie and Cress together. He ran an antique shop called Archimagus in the towns medieval area near the cathedral. Ellie had been in a couple of times without buying anything and without registering more about the proprietor than that he was a good-looking young man who after a token offer of help became a non-hassling background presence. On the third occasion when she expressed interest in a seventeenth-century knife box in walnut with a beautiful mother-of-pearl butterfly inlay on the lid, hed answered her questions with an eloquent expertise that very subtly implied that only a person of the most sensitive taste would have selected this item above all the rest of his stock. Finally he suggested she took it home to see how it looked in situ, no obligation, which had made a young woman whod just come into the shop roar with laughter.
I bet he hasnt mentioned the price yet, she said.
On reflection, Ellie had to admit this was true.
A price was mentioned. Ellie looked at the newcomer and raised an eyebrow enquiringly.
She pursed her lips, shook her head and said, That the best you can do for a friend of your sister?
You two are friends? said Pal.
Cressida had looked at Ellie, grinned and said, No, but I think we could be.