A Book of Common Prayer - Joan Didion 12 стр.


Lets flop back to one of the theories you were espousing yesterday, Mrs. Douglas. When you

Lets flop back to all of them, Warren said. Warren had been sitting in the same chair ever since he walked into the house and dropped his shopping bags. He had gotten up only to get himself drinks and once, perfunctorily, when the FBI men arrived and Leonard left. Im the felons father, he had said to the FBI men. He seemed bent now in a fit of laughter. I want to flop back to every one of these theories Mrs. Douglas has been espousing. In my absence. Ive been out of touch, I didnt know Mrs. Douglas had theories. To espouse.

When I what? Charlotte said.

Flip flop. We need ice, Charlotte.

When you The FBI man glanced uneasily at Warren. When you said yesterday that Marin might have been sad, what exactly did you mean? Normal everyday blues? Or something more, uh, out of the mainstream?

Just your normal everyday mainstream power-to-the-people latifundismo Berkeley blues. Warren was still bent with laughter. Just those old Amerikan blues. Spell that with a K.

I dont know what I meant, Charlotte said.

Some theory, Warren said. Did you get the K? Did you spell it with a K?

To push on for a moment, Mrs. Douglas, the office raised one other question. Did your daughter ever mention a Russian, name of, uh, lets see.

The FBI man examined his notebook.

Those old Amerikan blues didnt come up the river from New Orleans, they K-O-M-E up the river from New Orleans. Get it? Charlotte? Did he get the K?

He got it.

Gurdjieff, the FBI man said. Russian, name of Gurdjieff. Marin ever mention him?

In the first place he was an Armenian, Warren said. Otherwise youre on top of the case.

Im not sure I get your meaning, Mr. Bogart.

Not at all. Youre doing fine.

Excuse me. The Gurdjieff Im thinking of is a Russian.

Excuse me. The Gurdjieff youre thinking of is Bashti Levant.

Warren. Please.

Dont you think thats funny, Charlotte? Excuse me, the Gurdjieff youre thinking of is Bashti Levant?

Its funny, Warren. Now

You used to think I was funny.

Let me try to put this on track. The FBI man cleared his throat. Marin ever mention a Gurdjieff of any nationality? Ever mention reading about him?

No, Charlotte said.

Marin cant read, Warren said. She plays a good game of tennis, shes got a nice backhand, good strong hair and an IQ of about 103.

Charlotte closed her eyes.

Charlotte. Face facts. Credit where credit is due, you raised her. Shes boring.

Im not sure this is a productive tack, the FBI man said.

Irvings not sure this is a productive tack. Warren rattled his ice. Hear, hear, Charlotte. Listen to Irving.

Bruno, the FBI man said. The name is Bruno Furetta.

Dont mind me, Irving, Ive been drinking.

I happen to know youre not all that drunk, Warren. Charlotte did not open her eyes. I happen to know youre just amusing yourself. As usual.

You get the picture.

Charlotte stood up. And I want to tell you that I am not

Shes overwrought, Charlotte heard Warren say as she fled the room. Let me give you some advice, Irving. Never mind the Armenians, cherchez le tennis pro.

10

BOO HOO, WARREN SAID WHEN HE CAME UPSTAIRS AN hour later. What happened to your sense of humor?

Charlotte said nothing. Very deliberately she closed the book she had been trying to read since the day after the FBI first came to the house on California Street. The book was a detailed analysis of the three rose windows at Chartres, not illustrated, and every time Charlotte picked it up she began again on page one. She did not want Warren in the room. She did not want Warren to be in any room where she slept with Leonard, did not want him to see Leonards Seconal and her hand cream together on the table by the bed, did not want to see him examining the neckties that Leonard had that morning tried, rejected, and left on the bed. In fact she did not want him to see the bed at all.

We dont have anything in common any more. Warren picked up a yellow silk tie and knotted it around his collar. You and me. Leonard wont miss this, hes jaundiced enough. You ever noticed? Hes got bad color?

One thing we have in common is that we both agree that as far as having anything in common goes Charlotte broke off. She was watching a tube of KY jelly on the table by the bed. She did not see any way to move it into the drawer without attracting Warrens attention. As far as having anything in common goes we dont have anything. In common.

You sound like you had a stroke. You had a stroke?

I happen to have a headache.

You mean I happen to give you a headache.

I mean I want you to leave this room.

Dont worry, Ill leave this room. Warren sat on the bed, picked up the tube of KY jelly and put it in the drawer. I dont like this room.

Charlotte said nothing.

I only flew out here to see how you were.

Still Charlotte said nothing.

I dont like your room, I dont like your house, I dont like your life. Warren picked up a silver box from the table by the bed. The box held marijuana and played Puff the Magic Dragon when the lid was lifted. Warren lifted the lid and looked at Charlotte. I bet the two of you talk about turning on. See what I mean about your life?

Go away, Charlotte whispered.

Excuse me. I mean your life-style. You dont have a life, you have a life-style. You still look good, though.

Go away.

Warren looked at her for a while before he spoke.

I want you to come to New Orleans with me.

Charlotte tried to concentrate on meeting Leonard for lunch. Very soon she would walk out of this room and down the stairs. She would walk out of this house and she would take a taxi to the Tadich Grill, alone.

I said I want you to come to New Orleans with me, are you deaf? Or just rude.

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I said I want you to come to New Orleans with me, are you deaf? Or just rude.

She would go in the taxi alone to meet Leonard at the Tadich Grill.

I want you to see Porter with me. Porter is dying. Porter wants to see you. Do this one thing for me.

Charlotte tried to keep her mind on whether to order sand dabs or oysters at the Tadich Grill. Porter was a distant cousin of Warrens. During the five years Charlotte and Warren were married Porter had invested $25,000 in an off-Broadway play that Warren never wrote, $30,000 in a political monthly that Warren never took beyond its dummy issue, and $2,653.84 in ransoming Warrens and her furniture and Marins baby clothes from the Seven Santini Brothers Storage Company in Long Island City. Charlotte did not even like Porter.

Sand dabs.

No.

Oysters.

If you wont do it for me youll do it for Porter. Or youre a worse human being than even I think.

I cant just leave. Can I.

Youre not leaving, youre paying a visit to Porter. Who is dying. Who loves you.

I cant forgive Porter what he said to Leonard. At dinner out here. Two years ago. He behaved badly. In fact Charlotte could not even recall what Porter had said to Leonard, but whenever she talked to Warren she fell helplessly into both his diction and his rosary of other peoples disloyalties. I just cant forgive Porter that at all.

Porter loves you.

Leonard had to ask him to leave the house.

Whats that got to do with you.

There did not seem to Charlotte any ground on which this question could safely be met. She put it from her mind.

I said whats that got to do with you.

Charlotte stood up, walked to the dressing room, and took a coat from the closet.

Porters dying, Charlotte.

Charlotte put the coat over her shoulders.

Porters dying and youre putting on your mink coat. You got Hadassah today? Mah-Jongg? You get the picture about your life?

Its not mink. Its sable. I have a lunch date.

Say that again.

I said: I have a lunch date. With Leonard.

Dont let me keep you. Somebody who loves you is dying, your only child is lost, Im asking you one last favor, and youve got a lunch date. Warren opened the lid of the silver box again. The mechanism began to play. You getting it? You getting the picture? Youre never going to see Marin again but never mind, youve got a lunch date? And maybe after your lunch date you and your interesting husband can, what do you call it, get stoned?

You fuck, Charlotte screamed.

Warren smiled.

Charlotte grabbed up a pair of scissors and clutched them, point out.

Charlottes sable coat fell to the floor.

You walk into the house four hours ago, you havent said Marins name except to make fun of her. You try to use Marin on me, you dont give a fuck about

Warren still smiled.

The music box still played Puff the Magic Dragon.

Charlotte looked at her hand and opened it and the scissors fell to the floor. About Marin, she said.

Time and fevers, Warren said finally. His voice was tired. Burn away.

I dont know what youre saying.

Im not saying, babe. Im quoting. And the grave proves the child ephemeral. Who am I quoting?

Shakespeare. Milton. I dont know who youre quoting. Make that thing stop playing.

Auden. W. H. Auden. You arent any better read than you ever were, Ill give you that. Warren closed the box and picked up Charlottes coat from the floor.  But in my arms till break of day let the living creature lie. Wheres your lunch?

I cant go to lunch. She stood like a child and let Warren put the coat on her shoulders. I cant go to lunch crying.

Where was your lunch.

Tadichs.

Sure, Warren said. Lets eat some fish.


Warren entertained Leonard at lunch with news of an automotive heir they both knew who was devoting his fortune to Micronesian independence; excused himself five times to make telephone calls; canceled the oysters Leonard had ordered for Charlotte because Pacific oysters would not compare with Gulf oysters; ordered oysters himself, drank three gin martinis and a German beer, fed Charlotte with his own fork because she was too thin not to eat, left the restaurant before Leonard ordered coffee and did not reappear that afternoon or evening. In the morning Charlotte told Leonard that she could not stay in the same house with Warren. Leonard moved Warren to a motel in the Marina, and paid for the room a week in advance. Charlotte stayed upstairs until they were gone. I understand what Warren Bogart could do to Charlotte Douglas because I met him, later, once in New Orleans: he had the look of a man who could drive a woman like Charlotte right off her head.

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