“What?”
“Nothing.”
“Finish that sentence. Please, Nadia?”
A little shiver went through me. If he ever figured out how much power he wielded over me with those three syllables, I was doomed. He might not even be aware of it, but his voice deepened, softened, just a touch, when he spoke my name. Enough to make me think he might be into me a little bit.
Appealing as all hell. So incredibly hot. Get-in-my-bed sexy. Since I had a single, that wasn’t even a fantasy I could indulge without adding a bunch of details like a hotel room or whatever. I wondered what kind of bed Ty slept in. God, stop thinking about him that way. This can’t happen.
But my mouth wasn’t taking orders from my brain. “On one condition.”
“What’s that?”
“Answer one question for me.”
His voice went flat. “That depends on what it is.”
In that moment, I imagined shutters coming down, gates being drawn across windows for the night. I suspected he thought I was going to ask about Sam’s mom. And I hoped I would surprise him, always, in good ways. It was clear to me he didn’t want to discuss that sort of thing with me. At least not yet. We were baby-new, just starting, whatever we were.
Friends.
So I said, “Tell me what you dream of designing, once you’re a big-deal architect.”
“Oh.” Relief and perplexity colored his tone, warmed it. He was smiling again—I couldn’t resist peeking at him. Ty ate the peanut butter cup as he thought. “It’s good to hear you say it so implicitly, like my success is assured. The road feels really long sometimes.”
“I can imagine.”
“I’ve been in school since I was eighteen, but after Sam was born, I cut down to part-time. Anyway, you didn’t ask to hear me whine.” He paused, tapping at the arm of his chair with a shy look. “Damn. I don’t know if I can answer this after all. I’ve never told anyone.”
That startled me, making the question seem more meaningful than I’d realized. “It’s okay, but...in that case, I won’t be completing my sentence.”
He cursed, the first time I’d heard him swear. My smile felt like it might crack my cheeks. The ache in my chest was back, but it was all things irresistibly sweet and good. I set my fingers on the railing like I could touch him from here, and in tiny, incremental gestures, I traced the almost-distinguishable shape of his features. Someday I wanted to trace his nose like this and kiss his ears and— God. No more. I trembled a little, not from cold, but from want. How crazy, this was the best first date I ever had.
And it wasn’t one. Was it?
Definitely not.
“You drive a hard bargain. Okay. I want to design churches.” He shifted, creaking the love seat, and then went on, “I doubt I’ll be able to right away. I’ll probably end up doing offices or condos to start, but eventually? I would desperately love to design a church someday, see it built from each individual stone to stained glass panels so I can stand inside it and marvel.”
“Why?” I didn’t think it was an odd question. Up until this moment, Ty hadn’t struck me as particularly religious; he didn’t have the Jesus fish on his car.
He exhaled in a soft, trembling sigh. “So I can thank God personally for Sam.”
The need to make such a grand gesture spoke of such a deep, abiding love that tears actually welled up in my eyes. Despite my best efforts, they spilled over, trickling down my cheeks. I covered it by cramming a peanut butter cup into my mouth and washing it down with tepid tea, but it didn’t taste quite right. My voice would probably give me away.
But when I didn’t speak, he said, “That probably sounds dumb. Or pretentious. I can’t believe I—”
“No.” I couldn’t let him think that, and I leaned forward in my chair for emphasis. “Not at all. It’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever heard. Sam is so lucky to have you, Ty.”
“I’m the lucky one. I just wish I could remember it for more than five minutes at a time.” He paused, cocking his head, and I drew back, not wanting him to see but it was too late. “Are you crying?”
“Maybe a little. Shut up. It’s just...so very sweet.” My voice broke slightly, and I swiped at my eyes, embarrassed at how easily he got to me.
He could reach right into my chest and pluck out my heart.
“I’m glad I told you,” he said softly.
“Me, too.”
“But we had a deal, remember? No backing out.”
“I wouldn’t.” Finding the right words felt like a lightning-fast fencing match in my brain. Deliberately I repeated what I’d babbled only in my head before, measured this time, conscious of what I was putting out there between us. It didn’t matter if this was a bad idea. I’d promised.
“Not that you aren’t also...hot as hell, completely irresistible in every conceivable way.”
A sharp intake of breath from Ty.
Once I said it, I didn’t have the guts to wait for his reply. Quickly, I grabbed my stuff and carried it inside, closing the glass doors firmly behind me. Shaking like a leaf, I padded to my room and shut that door, as well, like he might be chasing me. The wood was all that held me upright. God only knew what I’d say to Lauren if she came home right now, because I wasn’t ready to dish.
Not by a long shot.
Even then, I suspected what was to come between us. His silent, secret yearning to build a church for his son marked the beginning of my complete and utter fascination with the man downstairs. Yoga breathing steadied my nerves, but not the flutters deep in my belly. I’d lobbed the ball pretty firmly into his court.
Now I just had to wait and see if he’d pass or play.
CHAPTER FIVE
Music throbbed from the speakers, vibrating the floor. Saturday night our apartment was crammed with people, standing room only. Max seemed pleased, and Angus was mellow, making out with his boyfriend, Josh, up against the kitchen counter. Josh was a tall, lean guy of Puerto Rican descent with black hair and melting brown eyes. He caught me looking and smirked over Angus’s shoulder.
“Perv,” he mouthed.
Lauren nudged me with a grin, pointing out one of Max’s friends. She smelled like she’d been drinking for a while, but her balance was fine. “What do you think?”
“He’s all right. You didn’t invite fine arts guy?”
“Hell, no. He was mad boring.” She took a deep breath. “Okay, I’m going in.”
Really, it was amazing how much she’d changed. In junior high and early high school, she was a complete computer geek with a paralyzing crush on my older brother. But after our sophomore year, she gave herself a complete makeover, personality and everything. Looking at her, nobody would ever guess that she used to be shy. She navigated the crowd wearing a bright smile and tapped her target on the shoulder. The guy’s name was Gabe or Garth, something beginning with G, and by the way he leaned in for a kiss ten minutes later, he was into her. Watching him squeeze my best friend’s ass was oddly hypnotic. Shaking my head, I turned away to grab a beer from the metal ice bucket in the corner.
Four hours ago, we weren’t remotely ready to host anything, but then Max roared up—on his working bike—along with five friends, and things came together fast. Between coolers, buckets, booze and multiple bags of ice, it started to look like a party. Girls wandered in later, each bearing chips or dip or a snack plate. It was amazing how Max got women he’d slept with to do this kind of thing. But whatever the magic, he had the apartment ready to rock by eight.
I, on the other hand, would be lucky to manage a side-to-side sway. To feign party spirit, I downed half my beer and joined a game of Kings Cup. The others were already pretty hammered, so it was easy to avoid losing by answering the questions right, and when the “all girls drink” came around, I sipped my beer. There was no way I was getting sloppy smashed.
“You look superserious,” Josh said in my ear.
I glanced over my shoulder and found Angus on my other side. I smiled up at them, pitching my voice to be heard over the music. “If I get distracted, I could be forced to drink that.” With a grimace, I pointed at the unholy cocktail in the center of the table.
Angus shook his head. “Then this would be forever known as the night Nadia got her stomach pumped.”
“You’re a wise man, Angus Starr.”
“Come on. This is disgusting.” Josh pulled me away from the game.
“Where are we going?”
“It’s better in your bedroom,” Angus said.
I smirked. “If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard that.”
“You’d have a dollar.” Josh was sharper than Angus, more prone to incisive comments that could cut you to the bone; he laughingly called this tactic the queen’s razor.
“True.”
Dipping my head in mock-chagrin, I followed them down the hall and found ten people sitting on my floor in a circle. Nobody was humping on my bed yet, but the night was young, give it time. I shot Angus a curious look, but Josh was already asking them to make room for us. If this was another drinking game, I might hide in my closet for the rest of the night. Or...I could go to the library.
“Courtney is bending spoons with her mind,” a girl named Emily said.
“Sure she is.”
A big-eyed blonde spoke up. “No, seriously, watch. It will blow your mind.”
Belatedly I sniffed the air. No wonder. It reeked of weed in here, so Courtney could be cheating like crazy and these people were so baked they’d never notice.
I whispered to Josh, “Is it that time of night already?”
“Mess with the stoned people? You know it.”
“Are you ready?” Courtney asked. “I’m only doing this one more time.”
She threw me a wink; I stifled a laugh. With a dramatic flourish, she pressed a metal spoon to her forehead and slowly the bottom began to twist outward. The way she was holding it, you’d have to be sober and paying attention to catch how she was pressing with one finger. The tokers let out a collective gasp.
“See, what’d I tell you.” Emily tried to nudge me and almost fell over.
“That was truly amazing.”
Courtney stood, took a bow then said, “Now pony up. Twenty bucks, you dipshits.”
Wonder what the bet was. Crumpled singles made their way to her, and she counted them before throwing up both arms to make a rock-star exit. She shoved a path down the crowded hall to pounce Max with a deep, sexy kiss. Apparently, conning high people made her horny.
“Our turn!” Josh said.
I had no idea what was about to happen, but this was definitely better than Kings Cup. While Josh could be puckish, he was never cruel. He went on to explain the rules of the game, which he was calling Suckface Trivia. I could tell by their hazy expressions that he’d already lost them, but most of them were grinning like they didn’t care about being let in on the joke.
“I’ll simplify,” Angus put in. “If you answer the question correctly, you get to kiss whoever you want that’s playing the game. If you get it wrong, you kiss the person immediately to your left.”
Simple enough.
Though it might be slightly heartless, I couldn’t wait to hear the questions. This should be hilarious. Josh kicked the game off by pointing at the big-eyed, blonde girl. “At what temperature does water boil?”
“Um. Celsius or Fahrenheit?”
“Either,” Angus said. “In the spirit of being fair to our neighbors to the north.”
She thought for a few seconds, then said, “I dunno.”
It didn’t seem to bother her that she was sitting next to a girl, the one named Emily. In fact, they kissed for a good, long minute, sort of lazy and sensual. Huh. If they keep this up, there will totally be an orgy on my bedroom floor.
“You see how it’s done,” Josh said.
“Uh-huh.” Half the guys in the room now looked even more glazed.
I whispered to Angus, “I don’t think it’s gonna pan out the way Josh expected. Unless he’s trying to start a sex pile?”
Two easy questions followed—and each got it wrong—so there was more random kissing. In fact, two straight guys got so into it that the first pushed the other down onto the floor. I watched them together, hands digging into shoulders, breathing hard. My skin prickled, but I’d be lying if I claimed I wasn’t squirming a bit. This felt slightly indecent, but nobody was making these people play the game.
Angus smiled faintly. “Trust me, this is exactly what he had in mind. He’s devilish.”
“Next question.” Josh turned to me. “Your turn.”
I doubted he could stump me since I hadn’t smoked anything, and it was tough to cloud your brain with a single beer. “Go for it.”
“What’s the capital of Illinois?”
Springfield.
Now I had to decide if I wanted to play it safe—and give the wrong answer—which meant kissing Angus. If I answered right, I could get in on the real action. As I glanced around the circle, I noticed a couple of the guys were cute, if burning at low brain wattage. I could pick someone up for the night. There was no question I was in the mood, but...
There’s nobody here I want.
“Cairo,” I said deliberately.
Josh narrowed his eyes. “You cow. You just want to kiss my boyfriend.”
“Who doesn’t? Have you seen him?” I grinned teasingly. “But hey, it’s your game, J-Rod. I didn’t make the rules.”
Angus turned his head, offering his mouth, but I pecked beside it, instead. Smiling, he slung an arm around my shoulders and squeezed me briefly then let go. The guys from two turns back were getting hot and heavy, probably more than even Josh could’ve predicted. I got up and wandered out before I ended up watching somebody get lucky in my room before I did.
Outside, the rest of the apartment was just wall-to-wall people. I didn’t realize I’d made the decision to bail until I grabbed my purse and keys. No plan, I just couldn’t stand the noise for another second. I much preferred attending parties to hosting them. In that scenario, if I got sick of the bullshit, I could always come home. Navigating through the crush, I got out the front door and down the steps before I heard someone come after me.
Crap. I thought that was a clean getaway.
“Where’re you going?” Lauren asked.
“Out. But don’t let me ruin your night.”
“You sure you’re okay?” She surveyed me with a concerned look.
“Positive. Look out for the sex show Josh is running in our bedroom, by the way.” As expected, that drove her back inside without another word.
The music had my head aching. Really, I just wanted to find a quiet place and...what? I had no idea. Before I could make up my mind where to go, Ty’s door opened, and he stepped into the hall. After last night when I all but offered myself naked on a platter, I half suspected he’d shut it again when he spotted me, but instead he gave me a half smile, ducking his head with a bashful air. Tentatively, I smiled back.
“You want to come in? When Sam has his SleepPhones on, he rarely wakes, unless I forget to set the music to loop. Tonight I remembered.”
This was so momentous, and I couldn’t stop smiling. This had to be my karmic reward for not making out with a random stoned guy. “That would be great. I was about to flee.”
Ty gestured at his place. “You can hide out with me until things settle down.”
“Thanks.” I brushed by. From the clean smell of him and his damp hair, I guessed he’d just gotten out of the shower.
Inside, his apartment looked much nicer than ours, decorated with a quirky charm that immediately made me feel at home. The basic floor plan was the same with a galley-style kitchen visible on entry, the front door opening into a combination living and dining room, where there was also a breakfast bar. He had three rustic, leather-topped stools set up plus a small wooden bistro table. The space had very little glass, probably because of Sam, and I loved the padded red L-shaped sectional. A geometric-patterned area rug covered the worn beige carpet, and he had an antique steamer trunk in the middle instead of a coffee table, very cool; it was wood, covered in leather and bound in bronze. The walls were adorned with an interesting combination of pen-and-ink cityscapes and some really colorful abstract art. On closer examination, I was pretty sure Ty had framed both his own work and Sam’s. Overall it was impressively tidy, and I said so.