Gritting my teeth, I jerked the curtains apart. Saw movement to the left. I zeroed in on it and thought I saw a tall, muscled body dressed in black. Thought that body stopped, turnedand glowing violet eyes met mine.
* * *
Will anything ordinary ever happen to me? I wondered the next morning as I trudged onto the bus. After maybe or maybe not seeing Cole, Id gone to sleep, as planned, but bad dreams had awoken me. Id tried to read but had ended up pacing and obsessing about those violet eyes.
Had I seen them, or had I imagined them?
Imagined, surely. Cole would never have stood outside my house, simply watching me. Plus, he didnt know my address. I hadnt even given it to Kat.
As lost in thought as I was, I didnt remember to keep my head down and my gaze averted. At the back of the bus, I spotted Justin Silverstone, with his dark hair and puppy dog brown eyes.
He gave me a warm smile and waved me over. I couldnt leave him hanging; his feelings would be hurt. And I couldnt hurt his feelings because I kinda owed him. As I lugged my thousand-pound backpack to the end of the bus, I noticed that the dark-haired girl who sat across from him was glaring at me. I didnt know her and had no problem ignoring her.
Justin slid to the window, making room for me. I eased down beside him. Hi, he said. He smelled nice, like some kind of fruity cereal and toothpaste.
Hi. His hair wasnt brown, as Id assumed. The morning sun cast bright rays through the glass, highlighting the strands. He was a redhead. In fact, the strands suddenly looked as if they were on fire.
Im Justin.
I know. You kinda made an impression in the cafeteria, and the girls filled me in. Im surprised you dont go by Ace or Killer, though.
His eyes flashed with irritation. Why? Whatd they tell you about me?
I wasnt sure what Id said to annoy him and hurried to soothe. Only your name and the fact that you keep to yourself, but everyone at school seems to go by a nickname. Kat, Frosty, Bronx, and because I didnt want to single out Coles group, I made up a few. Boo Bear, Jelly Bean, Freckles.
The irritation vanished and he laughed. Good point. What about you?
Im Ali.
Just Ali? Not Angel or Snowcake?
A bubble of amusement grew. Snowcake? Really? Thats what youd pick for me?
He reached out, pinched a lock of my hair between his fingers, reminding me of Cole. Yeah. Dont kill the messenger, but it kind of fits.
Maybe Ill just hurt the messenger a bit. I felt at ease with him, I realized. I liked him. And, the good news was, he had to live close to me since we were riding the same bus. Maybe we could, I dont know, hang out after hours. Clearly I needed to break up my routine. By the way, I never thanked you, I said. Sorry about that.
Thank me for what?
For helping me out with Mr. Butthole that first day, as well as the pointer about Mackenzie.
He raised a brow, even as he gave another laugh. A warm, natural sound, as if he found amusement in a lot of things and wasnt afraid to enjoy himself. Butthole? You are into nicknames, arent you?
I shrugged.
By the way, the trick with Buttle slash Butthole is to suck up. If you tell him that hes the smartest teacher youve ever had, hell be yours all year.
Buttle. Duh. How could I have forgotten that? Is that what you did?
I manned up the words a little, but yeah.
Manned up, I replied with a snort. So you grunted a lot and drilled your knuckles into his shoulder.
Thats cave-manning up. Learn the difference.
Now I was the one to arch a brow. Show me the difference.
All right. Heres manning up. His expression took on an awed cast. Dang, Mr. Buttle. My brain hurts from information overload. Good job, dude.
The bus hit a bump, and we bounced in our seats. So telling him that he clearly put the fun in funeral is out? The moment I spoke, I wanted to snatch the words back. No way did I want to talk about funerals.
Please, please, please tell him that. Ill even walk you to his room the moment we get to school, Justin said, but he must have noticed my discomfort a second later because he quickly changed the subject. So, heyI noticed you hanging with Kat.
Yes.
Have you known her long?
Met her over the summer. Why?
A long, heavy pause; a shrug. Last year she hung out with Cole Hollands crowd, and she definitely will again. Once someone breaches their inner trust circle, that someone doesnt leave it without a world of pain. Id be careful if I were you, or shell drag you down with her.
I liked Kat. A lot. I didnt care who she hung out with or dated, even if that who had Cole on speed dial. As for Justins second warning, I wasnt sure what was happening between me and Colesomething? Anything? Nothing?but I wasnt going to discuss it with him. I could barely even discuss it with myself.
So you know him? Cole, I mean? I asked, not changing the subject but making it clear relationships were off the menu.
Justin lost his smile. Yep.
Have many people entered that trust circle of his?
Nope. Hey, were here.
I looked around, and sure enough, the bus had stopped in front of the school, and all the other kids were standing, moving outside. The ride had never ended so swiftly.
I stood and strode down the aisle, Justin close on my heels. Automatically my gaze shot to the sky. A long stretch of baby blue, fat clouds inching bybut no rabbits. Thank you, Lord.
Justin stayed by my side as we entered the massive, winding building. We should hang out this weekend, he said.
Yeah, I Had promised to go to Reeves party, I recalled. Well, Kat had promised for me. Because I adored her, I had to keep that option open. Just in case. And wow, what a difference a few days could make. Before, Id scrambled for an excuse, any excuse, to avoid going. Now, I was actually considering making an appearance. Wait. Im not sure
Never mind, Justin muttered, his voice thick with embarrassment. Dont worry about it.
No! I rushed out. Not never mind. I wasnt thinking of ways to turn you down or anything like that. I was figuring out the best time.
He gave me another warm smile, all straight white teeth and happiness. Yeah?
It was a grin I found myself returning. Yeah.
Of course, thats when I ran into Cole. Literally ran into him. I had been looking at Justin, not paying attention to the path ahead of me, and plowed right into Coles solid chest.
His arms snaked around my waist, preventing me from ricocheting off him. I grabbed his shirt automatically, fisting the material. He was so strong, so steady, that he didnt move an inch.
Im so Our gazes locked, my blue with his violet, and once again the rest of the world faded away. Only, this time we didnt kiss. We
fought?
Night reigned, the full moon hemorrhaging from its overhead perch, practically dripping crimson into the sky. Trees surrounded us. Cole had his back pressed against mine. We were aloneexcept for the twenty or so monsters slowly stalking toward us.
Each had matted hair that was falling out in chunks, and sagging, pitted skin. Sunken eyes. Bloodstained cheeks. Dirty, ripped clothing. Each and every one of the monsters was moaning, creating a chorus of evil.
Violent tremors shook me, squeezing my lungs in a vise grip. Cole held two broadswords. How I knew they were broadswords when Id never before heard the term, I didnt know. All I knew was that I was freaked out. Those weapons were long, thick and sharpand stained with black ooze, just like the monsters.
On my count, go low, he demanded.
The count of what? Three? My voice squeaked with hysteria. Monsters, monsters, so many monsters, here, there, everywhere. Were these the ones who had eaten my parents? Was I next? Was Cole?
One, he said.
Closercloser still
Two
Oh, sweet heaven. This was it. The end of me, of us. There was no way we could fight off so many.
Three!
I fell forward, going as low as possible. In the vision, I watched as Cole twirled those swords, slashing two monsters across their throats. No blood flowed as those bodies twitchedtwitchedand rose again.
I should be on my feet. I should be helping him. He couldnt fight them on his own. Not all of them. I should
Ali!
The world whooshed back into focus. I stood in a hallway, kids all around me rather than monsters. Cole was still in front of me, still holding me, and horror filled his beautiful eyes. Black hair fell over his forehead, as if hed plowed his hands through a time or twenty. No hat today. His cheeks were fever flushed, probably a mirror of mine.
Horrified, we jerked away from each other, both of us panting. A clammy sheen slicked over my skin, and a mix of acid and glass shards took up permanent residence inside my stomach. And why wouldnt it? I wondered with a laugh bordering on the same hysteria Id experienced in the vision. Strange crap kept happening to me. Every day, there was something new. Something worse.
Cole backed away from me, one step, two. Thats when I noticed Mackenzie. Shed come up behind him, had wound her arm around his waist. Was tugging him backback, away from me.
How stunning she was, those dark curls cascading freely, her eyes glitter bright with rage as they pierced me. Despite the days heat, she wore another sweater and slacks. The business kind, making her look professional, like someone youd see on TV, telling you about the newest world crisis.
Justin placed his hand on my shoulder, clasping tightly enough to bruise. Are you okay?
I couldnt look away from Cole. Why was he frowning at me like that? Had he seen the fight, too? If sohow? Why? What did any of this mean?
Cole caught Justins action, though, and stopped moving away from me. Scowling now, he stepped forward, closing in on Justin. His hands curled into fists. Was he going to challenge Justin?
I couldnt let that happen. Grabbing hold of Justins wrist, I spun us both and raced around a corner, leaving Cole behind.
Are you and Cole dating or something? Justin asked me, dark emotion in his voice.
No.
Are you sure about that, because he
Im sure. Listen, Im not going to make it to first block. I couldnt sit through an hour-long lecture. I just couldnt. Already I verged on a panic attack. Those monstersCole I have to go.
I rattled off my phone number to Justin, told him to call me this weekend, then left him in the dust. I searched for Kat. Shed say something hilarious and I would calm down. I needed to calm down. I couldnt go on like this; Id crackand there was no telling what would spew out.
And maybemaybe Id tell her about the visions. She might laugh at me, she might refuse to talk to me again, but I had to risk it. There were too many unanswered questions. Plus, she knew Cole far better than I did. She might have information that would help me. As much as I needed to calm down, I needed someone to help me.
A few minutes later I found Reeve and nearly howled with a heady mixture of hope and relief. Wheres Kat? I have to talk to her.
Shes not coming today, Reeve replied, slamming her locker shut.
Hope deflated like a balloon. Why? Is she okay?
She flipped her hair over one shoulder, an action as natural to her as breathing. She didnt say. Just said shed see me tomorrow, at the party. Youre coming right?
Yes. No. Maybe. After that vision, I wasnt sure of anything. Was it a warning? Kind of like the rabbit in the sky? If I ventured out at night, would I see more monsters?
What about tonights game? she asked.
I have to go, I found myself saying again.
I didnt wait for her reply but kicked into motion. I had no car to take me somewhere else. I didnt know the building well and had no idea where the janitors closet or an empty classroom was. I couldnt call Nana to come get me, because Id have to fake being sickalthough, how fake would it be?and shed worry about being rightI knew you had pneumoniaand insist on taking me to the hospital.
Footsteps behind me. A hard arm wrapped around my waist. I curled both hands into fists, ready to do some damage to whoever the culprit was. Only, it was Cole, and for some strange reason that finally calmed meeven though he was the main source of my panic.
He forcibly switched my direction. This way. You and I are going to talk.
7Out of the Chrysalis and Into the Abyss
Cole ushered me outside, through the sunny parking lot now devoid of kidsand witnessesand into a brown Jeep Wrangler. Or maybe it was a white Jeep Wrangler. With all the mud caked on the sides, it was kinda hard to tell.
The top was off and the doors were gone. The inside had dried leaves on the floorboards, and specks of something dark. The backseat had been removed, creating a wide-open space.
I buckled into the passenger seat as he claimed the drivers side. A quick scan of the sky provedthank Godthere was still no rabbit cloud.
Dr. Wright will I began.
She wont care that were gone, he interjected.
How do you know? Did you ask her?
Silence.
Id take that as a big fat no. So where are you taking me? Whatever his answer, I wouldnt be scared. Not even if he said slaughterhouse or the far worse karaoke bar. (I was a terrible singer.) We were going to talk!
He cranked the radio, Since October suddenly pounding from the speakers, and peeled out, smoke rising from the tires and wafting inside the open vehicle. O-kay. Message received. He wanted to play the quiet game first. Prepare to lose, Cole Holland!
As wind whipped through my hair, I studied his profile. There was a slight bump in the center of his nose, as if hed broken it more than once. The split in his lip had healed a little, and the bruise on his jaw had faded. His chin jutted stubbornly, and I felt sorry for everyone who ever challenged him.
About ten minutes into the drive, the mountains and trees whizzing by, he shut down the music and tossed me a quick glance. What?
See? Id won. Just looking.
He popped his jaw. That boy. Justin.
When he said no more, I prompted, What about him?
Are you dating him?
The lunacy! Justin had asked the same thing about Cole. Throw in the reaction Id gotten from Kat, Reeve, Poppy and Wren regarding my association with both Cole and Justin, and one thing became crystal clear: speaking to a guy at Asher High was the equivalent of picking out wedding bands.
No, Im not. Why do you care, anyway? I heard the neediness in my tone, and cringed. Basically, in guy code, Id just said something along the lines of, Please tell me how much YOU want to date me. Please. Im begging you.
Thankfully, he ignored that and asked, Howd you get home yesterday?
I walked.
He threw me a look that was all kinds of dirty. Dont ever do that again, do you hear me? Those woods are dangerous.
For a moment, all I could do was sputter. First, you sound like my grandfather. Second, I think its absolutely adorable that you believe you can boss me around. Forget feeling sorry for anyone who dared challenge him. He needed challenging! Third, how do you know I went through the woods? For all you know, I live behind the school.
You dont. Confidence practically shot out of him like an arrow.
I had to ask, couldnt stop myself. Were you in my backyard last night? There. Better to get the hard truth so that I could get over myself than to chicken out and obsess about the answer.
A beat of silence. Then, Yes.
Wait. What? Why?
He cranked the music back up. I considered turning it down myself, but in the end, I acted like Miss Manners, as my mother would have wanted, and kept my hands to myself. This was his car. He could do whatever he wanted. Outside the car, however
A while later, he pulled into the parking lot of a twenty-four-hour grocery. A handful of other vehicles were there, and people were straggling in and out of the store. Cole removed the key from the ignition, cutting off the music for good.
He thought for a moment, then said, Im giving you my phone number. He faced the front windshield with such a dark expression, I suspected that whatever had snagged his attention was gonna get murdered. If you ever need a ride home from school, call or text me, and Ill make sure youre taken care of.
Uh, what was that? Surely the bad boy of Asher wasnt offering to chauffeur me. Me. The weird girl with the staring problem.
Okay? he insisted. Got it?
He was. He really was. I had a ride, I explained. I simply chose not to take it.
That dark expression leveled on me, eliciting a shudder. First, thats all you have to say to me?
Well, yeah. What had he expected? Thats the sweetest gesture in the whole wide world, and right now I feel like Im dancing across the stars? There was no way those words would ever leave my mouth. The fact that I was thinking them was enough to send me into a major shame spiral.
Second, why didnt you take it?
I wanted to walk, I said, giving him the same partial truth Id given my grandparents.
Youd better not want to walk again.
Or what? I asked. I wasnt meaning to be facetious. I honestly wanted to know.
He was total animalmake that, manimalas he snarled, Has anyone ever told you that youre the most frustrating person theyve ever met, or have most of the people in your life been too polite?
Hey
He rattled off his phone number, and I had to scramble to keep up and program it into my phone. Now give me your number.
It took a moment for his words to sink in. What kind of bizarre world had I entered? But Cole, I cant ever give you a ride. I dont have a car, so theres no
Are you trying to tick me off? Give me your number.
I was torn between feeling delighted by his insistenceand peeved. Peeved won. Ask nicely, I said, a day Id spent with my mom suddenly slithering into my mind.
Youre so not getting a Mother of the Year Award, Mom. You have yet to bake my favorite chocolate cake.
Ive just been waiting for you to ask nicely, darling.
A wave of homesickness hit me.
Nicely, Cole gritted out.
Well, how can I resist that? I grumbled, tempted to give him a bogus number just to prove a point. But then he wouldnt be able to call me, and, well, I really wanted him to call methough I had no idea what wed talk about.
Still waiting, he prompted.
I rattled off the numbers.
Thank you, he said, and if I wasnt mistaken, there was a note of relief in his voice.
I had to be mistaken. Either that, or those violet eyes had reduced the points in my IQ.
Stay put, he said, and got out of the car. He walked around, andhelped me out. Wow. I never would have guessed he would exhibit the classic signs of etiquette. Tell me you arent going to be this difficult for the rest of the day.
I guess well find out together, I said. His skin was warm against mine, his palm calloused and rough. I liked that, even shivered.
Cold? He pressed me up against the side of the Jeep, his arms caging me in.
No. I mean yes. I mean maybe. I dont know! Was he going to kiss me? For real? Here, now, in front of strangers? Id stop him. Right? (Before and not after.)
I dont think youre cold, he rasped, I think youre scared. Youre right to be scared.
I gulped. Im not scared.
Lets see what I can do to change that, shall we? Were going on a little adventure, you and I. When I give an order, youll obey it. There will be no asking politely, no matter how much you bat your lashes at me.
I opened my mouth to protest. Id never batted my lashes at anyone!
He shook his head, silencing me. Its for your safety.
Again I opened my mouth to protest.
Again he shook his head. Thats the deal. Agree or Ill take you back to school right now, and none of your questions will be answered.
Peeved all over again, I ran my tongue over my teeth. He was underhanded, sneaky and manipulative, that was for sure. Too bad I still liked him. What questions do you think I have?
Probably the same ones I have.
No way. Not possible. Fine, Ill follow your orders. Anything for answers. Just as long as you realize that every time you issue one, Im beating you up in my mind.
Realized, he said, thrums of amusement suddenly evident. But please refrain from mind-punching my pretty face. I like it just how it is.
Now I was the one fighting amusement. Someone so egotistical shouldnt have been so charming. But then, I loved Kat, so there you go.
His gaze zeroed in on my twitching lips. He leaned closer to meso close I could feel the heat of his breath trekking over my skin.
Whats going through your mind right now? he asked, his lips hovering over mine.
Dont you dare tell him! I scrambled for a winning reply. Will Mackenzie be upset that youre with me? Not that youre with me. Im just saying Shut up, idiot! Thats enough.
He straightened with a snap, the maybe-kiss moment completely lost. She shouldnt be. Were not dating anymore. I wasnt given a chance to reply. Come on. Its time for our adventure. I want to show you something.
At the back of the building was the thick, thriving forest that wound all the way to my grandparents neighborhood. I frowned. The drive to the store had taken longer than it should have, then. I replayed the route and realized Cole had doubled back a few times, taken turns he hadnt needed to take. There was no reason to do thatunless he was as paranoid as I was and had thought we were being followed.
Are you walking me home? I asked, not sure how I felt about that.
Displaying even better etiquette than before, he moved limbs out of my way. Yes and no. Now, not another word out of you until I say its okay. Youll distract me, and I have to make sure we dont stumble on any trip wires.
A lovely nonanswer sprinkled with supposed courtesy. Wait. Did you say trip wires?
Distracting me, he said in a singsong voice.
Annoying me, I sang back. But I bit my tongue and stayed quiet as we hiked the rest of the way through bushes, over thick tree roots and boulders, and up and down hills.
By the time we reached the fence to my backyard, my thighs burned and my heart galloped in my chest.
Note to self: start working out today. At least the air I was so heavily breathing in carried hints of pine and wildflowers, the rot all gone.
See these tracks? he asked, pointing to the ground.
Dread washed through me as I took in the very tracks Id noticed two nights ago. I could even make out the indention of my own tennis shoesbut not Emmas slippers. Yes. I see.
His gaze snapped to mine, slitted. Do you know what caused them? Besides the ones belonging to you, of course.
No. Maybe. I licked my lips. Do you? And how do you know Ive been out here?
Give me some credit. Youre an eight and a half, on the narrow side, and your shoes have a distinct zigzag pattern.
That was not something a normal kid would notice. Howand whyhad he?
He crossed his arms over his chest. So you havent seen anything out here?
Besides you? I asked, trying to figure out exactly where he was going with this.
Yes, besides me.
I couldnt admit it. I just couldnt. First I want you to answer me. Do you know what caused those tracks?
Yes. No hesitation from him.
Unbidden, I took a step closer to him. What?
You tell me.
I rooted my feet into the ground, too afraid Id try to press myself against him and shake him. I never said I knew.
You paled. That was answer enough.
II
But I have to hear you say the words.
Stubborn, nervous, I shook my head. No. I wont.
Cole stared at me, frowning, a slash of menace in the shadows. Youre really handicapping me here, Ali. I shouldnt be talking to you about this. And I cannotabsolutely will notmention anything outright. You have to tell me what Im trying to say.
Dang it! Was he implying what I thought he was implying? That he saw monsters, too, but couldnt admit it until I admitted it? But if I admitted it, and that wasnt what hed meant
Lets try this another way, he suggested. Your dad is dead, isnt he? Killed this summer.
Immediately I spun, giving him my back. I wont talk about that, either, I said. I figured Cole had done a search on me the same way Id done one on him.
He died in a car crash at night, in a cemetery, Cole persisted. You were with him. Did you see anythingweird?
I wont talk about that, I repeated, stomping away from him. If I did, I would cry in front of him, and I absolutely refused to cry in front of him.
A scream burst from my lips as my feet were jerked out from under me.
Something tight and inexorable banded around my ankle, lifting me upupuntil I dangled from a tree branch, no part of me touching the ground. Blood rushed into my head, making me dizzy.
What the heck! I shouted. As I swung back and forth, I looked up. Thick rope encased my anklea rope that had been painted to resemble tree bark.
Someone had booby-trapped the land behind my backyard. Or was this one of the trip wires Cole had mentioned?
He closed the distance between us and crouched down just in front of me. Suddenly we were eye to upside-down eye.
Let me down! I demanded.
His smile was anything but pleasant. You and your commands. Ask nicely.
How dare he throw my words back at me! Will you pleaselet medown? I ruined the saccharine-sweet request by trying to punch him.
Laughing, and baffling me with the sincere amusement I detected, he jumped out of striking distance. Now, now. No need for that. Id be happy to help you. After, he added.
After? What do you mean after? Do it now!
After we finish talking.
Oh, really? I arched back, then curled in, repeated the actions again and again, until I had a nice swing going. He was stretched to full height, the best kind of target.
What are you Oomph! He crouched over, wheezing.
Id just head butted him in the gut. Satisfaction filled me as I said, How about now?
When he no longer sounded like an old man hooked to an oxygen tank, he moved directly in front of me, placing my forehead directly in front of his navel. Brave boy. To keep me still, he settled his hands on my waist. My bare waist, I realized with a flare of panic. My shirt had risen up, catching on the underwire of my bra.
Stupid gravity! Motions rushed, I reached up, clasped the hem and tugged.
Settle down before you hurt my favorite body part. Im really fond of mygut. He shooed my hands away, my shirt falling and once again catching on my bra. Here. Let me. He tucked the material in the waistband of my jeans. Better?
Yes, now get me down from here! Who would do something like this, anyway?
I would, he stated simply.
I tried to meet his gaze, but he was simply too high up. You did this?
Thats what I just said, isnt it?
But why?
You tell me.
Not that crap again. Cole. Please. Act like youve never been to juvie and let me down.
He sighed, and it was not a patient sound. Ali has a mean streak. Good to know. And I told you. Ill let you downafter we chat. So lets chat. Did your dad ever talk to you about something weird?
Dread slithered through me, wrapped around my heart and squeezed painfully. Like what?
You. Tell. Me.
Argh! I do not know you. I do not trust you. Therefore, I will not talk to you about this.
Another sigh slipped from him. The answer is simple, then. Youll get to know me. Are you going to the game? To Reeves party?
Funny that I didnt have to think this answer. No to the game, but Im considering making an appearance at the party.
Okay, let me rephrase. Youre going to the party. But are you going with anyone?
No. Wait. Yes, I was. I was going with Kat, wasnt I?
Good. Ill meet you there.
My eyes widened to the point I feared theyd fall out of my head. Hed meet me therefor a date?