Seriously? Miles gapes, staring at me. Like, for reals?
I sigh, tearing my sandwich to shreds as Haven says, Trust me, words cannot describe the extreme measure of hotness. The only ones who can even come close are Damen and Roman, but then, theyre pretty much in a class by themselves, so they dont really count. How old is he anyway? She looks at me. Seems too young to be a boss.
Nineteen. I shrug, not wanting to talk about work, Jude, or pretty much anything else on that list. This is exactly the kind of thing Damen warned me about. The kind of thing I need to avoid. Speaking of hotties, hows Josh? I smile, making for a pretty awkward segue but hoping itll work.
Watching her aura waver and flare as she focuses on her cupcake and says, It ended the second he tried to give me the kitten. You shouldve seen him, smiling as though it was some miraculous gift. She rolls her eyes and rips her cupcake in half. I mean, seriously. How clueless can you get?
He was just trying to be nice Miles starts, but Haven isnt having it.
Please. She scowls. If he truly understood what I was going through, he never wouldve pushed some Charm replacement on me. Some adorable kitty thats only real destiny is to die once Ive grown extremely attached to her so I can experience the maximum amount of pain and suffering.
Miles rolls his eyes as I say, It doesnt always have to be like that
But she cuts right in. Oh really? Name one thingone living thingthat doesnt either die or leave you or both? Last time I asked you that question, you choked. So, Miles, you with the rolling eyes and smirking lips, go ahead, knock yourself out, name one thing that
Miles shakes his head, hands raised in surrender, hating all confrontation and gladly forfeiting the game before it can start.
Haven smirks, satisfied with our combined failure when she says, Trust me, all I did was beat him to the chase. It wouldve ended eventually anyway.
Well. Miles shrugs, returning to his text. For what its worth, I liked him. I thought you were good together.
Then you date him. Haven smirks, tossing a cupcake sprinkle his way.
No thanks. Too skinny and cute. He smiles. Now Evers boss on the other hand
I glance at Miles, checking his aura and seeing hes mostly jokingmostly.
His names Jude. I sigh, resigned to the conversation coming full circle again. And as far as I can tell he only likes girls that dont like him back, but youre welcome to take your best shot. I close my lunch pack, zipping it shut with an uneaten apple, bag full of chips, and a shredded sandwich inside.
Maybe you should invite him to my going away party, Miles says. You know, so I can treat myself to a nice long good-bye. He brushes his hand through his cropped brown hair and laughs.
About that Haven says, eyes partially obscured by the false eyelashes shes been experimenting with. My mom just tore up the denlike literally tore it up. Carpet ripped out, furniture cleared, walls knocked downwhich, on the one hand, is nice since theres no way they can sell the house when its all ripped up like that, but it also means theres no way we can party at my house so I was hoping
Sure. I nod, met by two faces so shocked Im ashamed. Realizing their regular visits to my house, our Friday-night pizza eating, Jacuzzi-soaking ritual, ended the moment Damen entered my life. But now that hes goneor at least determined to stay away for a whilemaybe its time to start up again.
You sure Sabine wont mind? Miles asks, voice hopeful but cautious.
I shake my head. As long as you dont mind Munoz dropping by, its all good. I roll my eyes.
Munoz? You mean the history teacher? They gape. My two best friends looking as shocked and bug-eyed as I was when I first found out.
Theyre dating. I nod, knowing as much as I hate it, I certainly cant stop it.
Haven pushes her royal blue bangs off her face and leans toward me. Waitlet me get this straight, your aunt Sabine is dating the hottie history teacher?
Whos hot for teacher now? Miles laughs, nudging her arm.
But Haven just shrugs. Please. Dont act like you havent noticed. I mean, as far as old guys go, especially ones who wear glasses and khakis, hes smokin.
Please dont call him smokin. I laugh in spite of myself. And just so you know, at night he ditches the specs and swaps the Dockers for designer denim.
Haven smiles, rising from the bench. Thats it then. Party at your house. This Ive got to see.
Is Damen coming? Miles slips his phone in his pocket, eyeing me carefully.
UmI dont knowmaybe. I shrug, pressing my lips together and scratching my arm so fervently I may as well wear a sign that says: HEYCHECK ME OUT! IM LYING! I mean, hes pretty busy these days looking after the twins and all
Is that why hes blown off school all week? Haven asks.
I nod, mumbling some nonsense about taking his finals early, but my heart isnt in it, and it shows. Seeing them nod in assent, but only to appease me, their eyes and auras say otherwise, theyre not buying a word of it.
Just make sure Judes there, Miles says, the mere mention of his name making my stomach dance.
Yeah, Ill need him as a backup in case my date doesnt work out like I hope. Haven smiles.
You have a date? Miles and I both say, voices blending as we take a moment to gawk.
Who? I ask.
Just as Miles says, That was fast!
But Haven just smiles, waving over her shoulder as she heads for class, singing, Youll see!
CHAPTER 36
Since I kept my promise to Munoz by attending history (which was way more awkward for me than it was for him), and since I made no such promise to any of my other teachers, I skip the rest of the day and head for the store.
My thoughts drifting to Damen as I cruise Coast Highway, visualizing him so clearly he manifests in the seat right beside me. Gazing at me with those dark, smoldering eyes, lips parted, enticing, as he presses a spray of red tulips onto my lapcausing an ache so palpable, I banish him well before he can fade. Knowing a manifest Damen will never do. Not when the real one is out theresomewherewaiting for three months to end.
But I cant wait. I refuse to wait. The only way to rid myself of this hollow empty feeling is to get Damen back. And the only way to do that is to crack Romans code. Get my hands on that antidote once and for all and then all of my problems are solved.
But short of returning to his house, Ive no clue where to find him. Like Damen, hes pretty much blowing off the last days of school.
I pull into the alley and claim the small space in back, storming through the door with such speed and force, Jude glances up in confusion as I head behind the counter and reach for the appointment book.
Trust me, if Id known you were ditching, I wouldve scheduled some readings, but as it stands, I got nothing.
Im not ditching, I mumble, even though we both know I am. Okay, maybe I am. I shrug, glancing at him. But its the last week of school so its really no biggie. You wont tell anyone, will you?
He dismisses the thought with a wave of his hand, lifting his shoulders as he says, Just wish Id known. I wouldve brought my board.
You can still get it. I head for the shelves and begin rearranging some books. Wanting to put some distance between us so I can avoid the enticing wave of calm his proximity brings. Seriously, I add when I see hes not moving. Ill keep an eye on the place.
He looks at me, gaze steady, focused on mine. Ever he starts.
I look at him, sensing where this is going and eager to dispel any fears before he can get there. You dont have to pay me, I say, arms loaded with books. Im not here for the overtime. In fact, I dont even care if you pay me at all.
He narrows his gaze for one beat, then two. Tilting his head to the side when he says, You really dont, do you?
I shrug and return all the books, taking a moment to line them up perfectly before answering, Nope, I really dont. Feeling good to unburden yet another illusion of mine, no matter how small.
Exactly what are you here for? he asks, voice catching in a way I cant help but notice. The book?
I turn, feeling all nervous and squirmy as my gaze settles on his. Is it that obvious? I lift my shoulders, forcing a laugh.
Relieved when he smiles and jabs his thumb over his shoulder as he says, Go ahead, have fun. I wont tell Damen what youre up to.
I shoot him a look making it clear Im over the Damen jokes, until I see that hes serious.
Sorry. He shrugs. But its pretty clear hes not into it.
I shrug, neither confirming nor denying. Theres no way Im discussing Damen with him. Heading for the back room and settling in at the desk, just about to unlock the drawer with my mind when I see that hes followed.
Oh, um, I forgot that its locked, I mumble, feeling false and ridiculous as I motion toward the drawer, knowing Im the worst actress ever but still going through the motions.
He leans in the doorway, shooting me a look that makes it clear hes not buying it. Didnt seem to stop you the last time, he says, voice low and deep. Or even the first time I found you in the store.
I swallow hard, unsure what to say. Admitting my abilities is breaking Damens most cardinal rule. The weight of Judes gaze heavy on mine as I say, I cantI
He lifts a brow, knowing I very well can.
I cant do it in front of you, I finish, knowing its foolish to keep up this ruse.
Does this help? He places a hand over each eye and grins.
I gaze at him for a moment, hoping he wont peek through his fingers, then I take a deep breath and close my eyes too, seeing the lock spring open, before retrieving the book. Placing it on the desk as he takes a seat, head cocked to the side, foot balanced on his knee when he says, You know, youre pretty special, Ever.
I freeze, fingers hovering above the ancient tome, heart beating overtime.
I mean, your gift is special. He looks at me, eyes squinting, shoulders lifting, the color on his cheeks deepening as he adds, Ive never met anyone with abilities like yours. The way you absorb information from a book, a personand yet
I gaze at him, throat tight and hot, sensing the beginnings of something Id rather avoid.
And yetyouve no idea of who stands beside you. Right beside you, in fact.
I sigh, wondering if this is the moment when he thrusts a pamphlet at me and goes into full-blown testimony mode, but he just motions to my right, smiling and nodding as though someones right there. But when I turn to look, all I get is blank space.
At first I thought for sure youd arrived in this store to teach me. He smiles, reading my expression when he adds, You do know theres no such thing as coincidencethe universe is far too precise for random events. You came here for a reason, whether you realize it or not, and
I was led here by Ava, I say, uncomfortable with where this is going and wanting it to stop. And I returned to see Lina not you.
But he just nods, completely unfazed. And yet, you returned at a time when Lina wasnt here, making it possible for you to find me.
I shift in my seat and focus on the book since I cant look at him. Not after what he just said. Not after my trip to Amsterdam with Damen.
Ever hear the phrase when the student is ready the teacher appears?
I shrug, glancing at him briefly before looking down again.
We meet the people were supposed to when the time is just right. And even though Im sure I have plenty to learn from you, Id really like to teach you something if youll let meif youre open to learning.
I can feel his gaze, heavy and intense, and knowing my options are few, I just shrug. Seeing him nod and look to my right, tilting his head as though someones there.
Theres someone who wants to say hello, he says, gaze fixed on that spot. Though she warns me youre skeptical so Ill have to work extra hard to convince you.
I stare at him, neither blinking nor breathing. Thinking that if this is a jokeif hes tricking me in some waythen Ill
Does the name Riley mean anything to you?
I swallow hard, unable to speak. My mind speeding backward, searching every conversation weve ever had, looking for the moment when I might have revealed that.
He looks at me, patient, waiting. But I just nod, unwilling to offer anything more.
She says shes your sisteryour younger sister. Giving me no time to reply when he adds, Oh, and shes brought someone with heror rather He smiles, pushing his dreads off his face as though to see better. Or rather somethingits a doga yellow
Lab, I say, almost involuntarily. Thats our dog
Butterball. He nods.
Cup. Buttercup. Eyes narrowing, wondering how he got that one wrong if Rileys truly standing beside him.
But he just nods, going on to say, She says she cant stay long since shes keeping quite busy these days, but she wants you to know that shes with you, a lot more than you think.
Really? I fold my arms and lean back in my seat. Then why doesnt she show herself? I frown, abandoning my vow to keep silent and indulging my frustration with her. Why doesnt she do something to make herself known?
Jude gives a half smile, lips quirking the tiniest bit when he says, Shes showing me a tray of He pauses, squinting as he continues, brownies. She wants to know if you enjoyed them?
I freeze, remembering the brownies Sabine made a few weeks ago, and how the smallest piece was marked with my initial, the largest with Rileys, just like she used to do back when my mom used to make them
I look at Jude, throat so tight no words can get past. Struggling to compose myself as he says, She also wants to know if you enjoyed the moviethe one she showed you in
Summerland. I close my eyes, fighting back tears, wondering if my blabbermouth sister is going to tell him about that, but he just shrugs, and ends it right there.
Tell her I start, voice so hoarse and scratchy Im forced to clear my throat and start again. Tell her yes to everythingall of it. And tell her thatthat I love herand miss herand to please say hi to Mom and Dadand that she really needs to help me find a way so I can talk to her againbecause I need
Thats where I come in, he says, voice quiet, subdued, eyes seeking mine. She wants me to be our go-between since she cant speak directly to youat least not outside of your dreams. Though she wants you to know she can always hear you.
I look at him, skepticism taking over again. Our go-between? Would Riley really want that? Does that mean she trusts him? And if so, why? Does she know about our past? And whats that about our dreamslast time she appeared in my dream it was more like a nightmare. A riddle-filled nightmare that didnt make any sense.
I look at Jude again, wondering if I can trust himif hes somehow making this up? Maybe the twins told himmaybe he Googled the accident and
Shes leaving, he says, nodding as he smiles and waves good-bye at my supposedly invisible sister. Would you like to say anything before she goes?
I grip the sides of my seat, gazing down at the desk as I struggle to breathe. The space feeling suddenly cramped, confined, as though the ceiling is dropping as the walls cave in. Having no idea if I can trust him, if Riley is here, if any of this is even real.
All I know is that I need to get out of here.
Get some air.
His voice calling after me as I spring from the desk and bolt for the doorhaving no idea where Im headed, but hoping its vast, open, far from him.
CHAPTER 37
I run out the door and head for the beach, heart racing, mind spinning, forgetting to slow down to a more normal speed until Im already there. Toes tipped toward the water, a cloud of sand and bewildered people left in my wake. Each of them squinting and shaking their heads, telling themselves they imagined it, couldnt possibly be. No one can run that fast.
No one who appears as normal as me.
I abandon my flip-flops and wade farther in, at first stopping to roll the hem of my jeans, then deciding not to care when a wave comes and wets them to my knees. Just wanting to feel somethingsomething tangible, physicala problem with an obvious fix. Unlike the kind Ive been wrestling with.
And though Im no stranger to loneliness, Ive never felt quite as lonely as this. Ive always had someone to go to. SabineRileyDamenmy friendsbut now with my entire family gone, Sabine busy with Munoz, my boyfriend on a break, and friends I cant confide inwhats the point?
Whats the point of having these powers, the ability to manipulate energy and manifest things, if I cant manifest the one thing I really want?
Whats the point of seeing ghosts when I cant see the ones who actually mean something to me?
Whats the point of living forever if Im forced to live it like this?
I go deeper, til Im up to mid-thigh, never having felt so alone on such an overcrowded beach, so helpless on such a bright and sunny day. Refusing to budge when he comes up from behind, grasping my shoulder and trying to pull me away from the waves. Enjoying the slam of water as it wets my skin, the ceaseless push and pull, luring me in.
Hey. His eyes narrowed against the sun as he studies me closely, refusing to loosen his grip til hes sure Im okay. What do you say we head back inside? Voice calm, careful, as though Im fragile, delicate, capable of doing just about anything.
I swallow hard and hold my ground, gaze fixed on the horizon when I say, If you were jokingif you were in any way playing me I shake my head, unable to finish, but the threat is implied.
Never. He squeezes tighter, holding me steady, pulling me up and over a small oncoming wave. You read me, Ever. That very first day. You know what I can dowhat I can see. I take a deep breath, about to speak when he adds, And just so you know, shes been with you several times since. Not every time, but most of them. Though this is the first time she spoke.
And why is that? I turn, gaze meeting his. Having no real reason not to believe, but needing to be as sure as I can.
I guess she wanted to build a little trust. He shrugs. Not unlike you.
I look at him, gaze into those sea green eyes, the truth laid open, bared for me to see. Hes not lying, not at all playing, certainly not making it up. He really does see Riley, and his only agenda is to help.
I think this is why we found each other. He nods, voice lowered to almost a whisper. I wonder if Riley arranged this?
Riley orsomething elsesomething greater than us? I stare at the ocean, wondering if he recognizes me like I recognize him. If he feels the ping in the gut, the prickle of skin, the strange yet familiar pullthe same things I feel? And if so, what does it mean? Do we really have unfinished businesskarma that must be addressed?
Is there really no such thing as coincidence?
I can teach you, he says, gaze like a promise he wants to fulfill. Theres no guaranteebut I can try.
I remove myself from his grip and wade farther in, not caring that my bottom halfs soaking while the rest of mes dry.
Everyone has the ability. Just like everyones psychicor at the very least intuitive. Its just a matter of how open one is, how willing to let go and learn. But with your giftstheres no reason why you cant learn to see her too.
I glance at him, but only briefly, somethings caught my attentionsomething that
The trick is to raise your vibrationgetting it to a level where
We dont see the wave until its already cresting, leaving us no time to duck dive or at the very least run. The only thing keeping me from a complete and total wipeout are Judes incredibly fast reflexes and the strength of his arms.
You okay? he asks, gaze boring into mine.
But my attentions elsewhere, drawn to that warm wonderful pull, the familiar loving essence that only belongs to one persononly belongs to him
Watching as Damen cuts through the water, board tucked under his arm, body so sculpted, so bronzed, Rembrandt would weep. Water sluicing behind him like a hot knife through butter, cleanly, fluidly, as though parting the sea.
My lips part, desperate to speak, to call out his name and bring him back to me. But just as Im about to, my eyes meet his and I see what he sees: mehair tangled and wetclothes twisted and clingingfrolicking in the ocean on a hot sunny day with Judes tanned strong arms still wrapped around me.
I release myself from Judes grip, but its too late. Damens already seen me.
Already moved on.
Leaving me hollow, breathless, as I watch him retreat.
No tulips, no telepathic message, just a sad, empty void left behind in his place.
CHAPTER 38
Jude follows me out of the water and halfway down the beach, calling after me, trying to keep up, finally surrendering when I cross the street and head toward the store where Haven works.
I need to talk to someone, confide in a friend. Put it all out there and unburden myself, no matter the cost.
Immune to the weight of my soaking wet jeans, the slap of fabric, my clinging, damp teenot even thinking about manifesting something dry to wear until I get to the door and find Roman there.
Sorry, no shoes, no shirt, no service. He smiles. Though I must say, I am enjoying the view.
I follow his gaze all the way down to my chest, covering it with my arms when I see how my top has gone pretty much see-thru.
I need to talk to Haven. I start to push past him only to be blocked once again.
Ever, please. This is a classy establishment. Maybe you should come back when youre a little morepulled together.
I peer over his shoulder, catching a glimpse of a fairly large space so opulent, so packed with stuff, its like the inside of Genies bottle. Crystal chandeliers hanging from the rafters, iron sconces and framed oil paintings marking the walls, while the floors are covered with colorful, woven, overlapping rugs as antique furnishings butt up against rack after rack of vintage clothing and tall glass display cases filled with trinkets and jewelry.
Just tell me if shes here. I glare, patience running thin as he looks me over and smirks. Trying to tune into her energy and assuming hes blocking me when I dont get very far.
Maybe yesmaybe no. Whos to say? He reaches into his pocket and retrieves a pack of cigarettes, offering one to me. But I just roll my eyes and make a face, seeing him squint as he brings his lighter to the tip, inhaling deeply then exhaling as he says, Fer chrissakes, Ever, live a little! Immortality is wasted on you!
I frown, making a show of waving the smoke out of my face when I say, Who owns this place? Realizing Ive never noticed it before and wondering what his connection could be.
He takes a long drag, eyes narrowed, catlike, as he looks me over from my head to my feet. You think Im joking but Im not. No self-respecting immortal would ever be seen looking like that. He wags a finger at me. And yetand yetfeel free to keep the topjust be sure to change all the rest. He leers, grinning at me in the most predatory way.
Who owns this place? I repeat, peering inside again, an idea beginning to form. This isnt just any old vintage store. These are Romans own personal goods. The stuff hes hoarded through the last six hundred years, doling them out diligently, selling at just the right timea dealer of antiquities.
He squints, exhaling in a series of smoke rings as he says, A friend owns it. Its of no concern of yours.
I narrow my gaze, knowing better. This is his store. Hes Havens boss, the one who signs her checks. But not wanting to let on I just say, So youve made a friend. How sad for them.
Oh, Ive made plenty. He grins, taking another deep pull before tossing the butt and stomping it out with his shoe. Unlike you, I dont alienate people. I dont hoard my gifts so to speak. Im a populist, Ever. I give the people what they want.
And whats that? I ask, part of me wondering why Im still here, dripping water onto the sidewalk, shivering in my wet jeans and see-thru tee only to engage in this useless, go-nowhere banter, while the other parts stuck, unable to move.
He smiles, deep blue eyes boring into mine as he says, Well, they want what they want now, dont they? His deep guttural laugh, almost like a growl, sending chills over my skin. Its not too hard to decipher. Perhaps youd like to venture a guess?
I peer over his shoulder, sure I saw something move. Hoping its Haven but finding the same girl I saw at his house that nightthe night I was foolish enough to stop by. Her eyes meeting mine as she makes her way around the counter and approaches the door where we standall raven black hair, coal black eyes, and smooth dark skina beauty so exotic it robs me of breath.
While its been nice chatting with you, Ever, Im afraid its time for you to move along. No offense, darlin, but youre looking a bitunkempt. Bad for business to have you loitering here. Might drive away all the customers, you understand? Though if its bus change you need He fishes around in his pocket, coming up with a handful of quarters arranged on his palm. Ive no idea how much these things costhavent had to ride one since
Since six hundred years ago, I say, narrowing my gaze. Watching the girl stop and turn the second Roman wiggles his fingers, a signal for her to back away. A gesture someone else mightve missed, but not me. Seeing her stop and head into a back room I cant see.
I turn, knowing Ive no business here. Romans voice calling out from behind me as I make my way down the street, shouting, There were no buses six hundred years ago! Youd know that if youd quit ditching history!
But I just continue, refusing to play, almost to the corner when he reaches out and grips me with his mind: Hey, Everwhat do the people want? You might want to ponder that one, could be the clue that leads you to the antidote.
I stumble, hands seeking the wall, fighting to steady myself as the sound of Romans voice crowds my head. His lilting accent singing:
Were not so different you and I. Were very much the same. And it wont be long now, darlin, til youll get the chance to prove it. Wont be long now til you finally pay the price.
Laughing heartily as he releases me and sends me on my way.
CHAPTER 39
The next day I head to work as though nothing happened, determined to get past that awkward embrace on the beach, not to mention a shared past that Jude not only has no recollection of, but that never came to fruition for a reason.
A reason named Damen.
But even though I rushed, Miles and Haven still managed to beat me, as they both lean on the counter, flirting with Jude.
Whatre you doing? I ask, struggling to keep the panic to a minimum while glancing between the three of thema triumphant Haven, a gleaming-eyed Miles, and a more than a little amused Jude.
Spilling your secrets, exaggerating your flaws, oh, and inviting Jude here to my going away partyyou know, in case you forget to. Miles laughs.
I glance at Jude, cheeks flaming, unsure what to say. Still gazing at him when Haven adds, And as luck would have it, hes free that day!
I make my way around the counter as though thats perfectly fine, as though I couldnt care less that the guy Ive apparently spent the past several centuries hooking up withthe same guy my soul mate is convinced I have unfinished business withwill be partying in my living room in just a few days.
Haven picks up the flyer advertising Judes Psychic Development class and waves it in front of my face. And how come you never mentioned this? She frowns. This kind of thing is right up my alley. You know how Im totally into this stuff. She turns to smile at Jude.
Sorry, but I really didnt. I shrug, dropping my bag under the counter and grabbing the stool next to Jude. Refusing to go along with something thats not even remotely true, and wondering just how soon I can convince them to leave.
Well, I am. Have been for a while now. She lifts her brow, looking at me in a way that dares me to refute it, but I refuse to bite. Luckily, Jude said hed try to squeeze me in, she adds with a smirk.
I shoot him a look, a quick, hard, fleeting look, watching as his shoulders pull in ever so slightly as he shrugs and heads for the back room. Returning a moment later with his board hitched under his arm, waving at the three of us as he heads out the door.