She pointed her chin at the medicine cabinet over the sink. "In there. The glass on the sink is clean."
I washed out my mouth, taking the opportunity to try to collect my thoughts. When I was done I turned to face her. Deciding not to waste time on bullshit, I got straight to the point. "How can you tell if a vision is real or just a dream?"
She sat down on one of the beds and shook back her long, perfect blond hair. "It's a feeling in your gut. Visions are never easy or comfortable or fucking flower-draped like they are in the movies. Visions suck. At least real ones do. Basically, if it makes you feel like shit, it's probably real and not just a dream." Her blue eyes looked me over carefully. "So, you've been having visions?"
"I thought I had a dream last night, a nightmare actually. Today I think it was a vision."
Aphrodite's lips turned up only slightly. "Well, that sucks for you.
I changed the subject. "What's going on with Neferet?" Aphrodite's face went carefully blank. "What do you mean?"
"I think you know exactly what I mean. Something's off about her. I want to know what."
"You're her fledgling. Her favorite. Her new golden girl. Do you think I'm actually going to say shit to you? I may be blond, but I'm definitely not stupid."
"If that's the way you really feel, why did you warn me against taking the medicine she gave me?"
Aphrodite looked away. "My first roommate died six months after she got here. I took the medicine. Itit affected me. For a long time."
"What do you mean? How did it affect you?"
"It made me feel funny, detached. And it stopped my visions. Not permanently, just for a couple of weeks. And then it was hard for me to even remember what she looked like." Aphrodite paused. "Venus. Her name was Venus Davis." Her eyes met mine again. "She was the reason I chose Aphrodite as my new name. We were best friends and we thought it was cool." Her eyes were filled with sadness. "I've made myself remember Venus, and I figured you'd want to remember Stevie Rae."
"I do. I will. Thanks."
"You should go. It won't be good for either of us if anyone knows you've been here talking to me," Aphrodite said.
I realized that she was probably right, and turned for the door. Her voice stopped me.
"She makes you think she's good, but she's not. Everything that's light isn't good, and everything that's darkness isn't always bad."
Darkness does not always equate to evil, just as light does not always bring good. The words that Nyx had said to me the day I was Marked were mirrored in Aphrodite's warning.
"In other words, be careful around Neferet and don't trust her," I said.
"Yeah, but I never said that."
"Said what? We're not even having this conversation." I shut the door behind me and hurried to my room where I washed my face and brushed my teeth, pulled on some shoes, and then returned to the living room.
"Ready?" Erik asked.
"We'll come, too," Damien said, motioning to include the Twins, Jack, and Drew.
I started to tell them no, but I couldn't make the word come out. The truth was that I was glad they were here, glad they obviously felt the need to join forces around me and protect me. I'd worried for a really long time that my extra powers and my weird Goddess-chosen Mark would brand me such a freak that I wouldn't fit in, wouldn't have any friends. But the opposite seemed to be happening.
"Okay, let's go." We headed for the door. I wasn't entirely sure what I was going to say to Neferet. All I knew was that I couldn't continue to keep my mouth shut, and that I had a terrible feeling my "dream" had really been a vision, and that there was more to the "spirits" I'd been seeing than ghosts. Most of all, I was afraid they'd taken Heath. What that said about what Stevie Rae had become chilled me to my core, but it didn't change the fact that Heath was missing, and that I think I knew who had taken him (if not what).
We hadn't quite made it to the door when it opened and Neferet glided into the room on a tide of snow-scented air. She was followed by Detective Marx and Detective Martin. They had blue down jackets on that were zipped to their chins. Their hats were covered with snow and their noses were red. Neferet, as usual, looked perfectly poised, perfectly groomed, perfectly in control.
"Ah, Zoey, good. This saves me from having to look for you. The two detectives have some rather bad news, and they'd also like to speak with you for a moment."
I didn't spare a glance for Neferet, and I could feel her stiffening as I responded directly to the detectives. "I already heard on the news that Heath's missing. If there's any way I can help, I will."
"Could we use the library again?" Detective Marx asked. "Of course," Neferet said smoothly.
I started to follow Neferet and the detectives from the room, but paused to look back at Erik.
"We'll be here," he said.
"All of us," Damien said.
I nodded. Feeling better, I went to the library. I'd hardly entered the room when Detective Martin started questioning me.
"Zoey, can you account for your whereabouts between six thirty and eight thirty this morning?"
I nodded. "I was upstairs in my room. Around that time I was talking on the phone to my grandma, and then Heath and I text messaged each other back and forth a few times." I reached into my jeans pocket and pulled out my cell phone. "I haven't even deleted the messages. You can see them if you want."
"You don't have to give him your phone, Zoey," Neferet said. I made myself smile at her.
"That's okay. I don't mind."
Detective Martin took my phone and started going through the text message files, copying onto a little pad the messages. "Did you see Heath this morning?" Detective Marx asked. "No. He asked if he could come see me, but I told him no."
"This says that you were planning on seeing him Friday," Detective Martin said.
I could feel Neferet's sharp eyes on me. I drew a deep breath. The only way I could do this would be to stick as close to the truth as I was able.
"Yeah, I was going to go out with him after the game Friday."
"Zoey, you know it is strictly against school rules to continue to date humans from your old life." I noticed, as if for the first time, the disgust that filled her voice when she said humans.
"I know. I'm sorry." Again, I told the truth, only omitting a bloodsucking, Imprinting detail here and an I-don't-trust-you-anymore detail there. "It's just that Heath and I had so much history between us that it was really hard to totally stop talking to him, even though I knew I had to. I thought it would be easier if we met and I told him to his face, once and for all, why we couldn't see each other. I would have told you, but I wanted to handle it on my own."
"So, you didn't see him this morning?" Detective Marx repeated.
"No. After we were done text messaging I went to bed."
"Can anyone substantiate that you were in your room sleeping at that time?" Detective Martin asked, handing me back my phone.
Neferet's voice was ice. "Gentlemen, I already explained to you the terrible loss Zoey experienced just yesterday. Her roommate died. So, how she could have anyone substantiate her whereabouts at"
"Um, excuse me, Neferet, but actually I wasn't sleeping alone. My friends Shaunee and Erin didn't want me to be by myself, so they came to my room and slept with me." I left Damien out. No point getting the kid in trouble.
"Oh, that was very kind of them," Neferet said gently, switching in one breath from scary vampyre to concerned mother. I tried not to think of how not fooled I was by her.
"Do you have any idea where Heath might be?" I asked Detective Marx (I still liked him better of the two).
"No. His truck was found not far from the school wall, but the snow is falling so fast that any tracks he might have made have been completely covered."
"Well, I should think that instead of wasting your time questioning my fledgling, the police would be spending time searching the gutters for the teenager," Neferet said in an offhand tone that made me want to scream.
"Ma'am?" Marx said.
"It seems clear to me what happened. The boy was trying to see Zoey, again. It was only last month that he and that girlfriend of his climbed our wall saying they were going to break her out of the school." Neferet waved her hand dismissively. "He was drunk and high then, he was probably drunk and high this morning, too. The snow was too much for him and he's probably fallen into a gutter somewhere. Isn't that where drunks usually end up?"
"Ma'am, he's a teenager, not a drunk. And his parents and friends say he hasn't had a drink in a month."
Neferet's soft laugh made it obvious how much she didn't believe him. Surprising me, Marx ignored her and studied me carefully. "How about it, Zoey? You two dated for a couple of years, right? Can you think of where he might have gone?"
"Not out this way. If his truck was missing off Oak Grove Road in BA I could tell you where the keg party might be." I didn't mean it as a joke, especially after Neferet's mean cracks about Heath, but the detective seemed to be trying not to smile, which suddenly made him appear kind, and even approachable. Before I could change my mind, I blurted, "But I had a weird dream this morning that might not actually have been a dream but could have been some kind of vision about Heath."
Into the stunned silence Neferet's voice sounded clipped and harsh. "Zoey, you have never before manifested an affinity for prophecy or visions."
"I know." Purposefully I made myself sound unsure and even a little scared (the scared part wasn't exactly pretense). "But it's just too weird that I dreamed that Heath was over by the east wall, and that he was grabbed there."
"What grabbed him, Zoey?" Detective Marx's voice was urgent. He was definitely taking me seriously.
"I don't know." Which definitely wasn't a lie. "I do know they weren't fledglings or vampyres. In my dream four cloaked figures dragged him away."
"Did you see where they went?"
"No, I woke up screaming for Heath." I didn't have to fake the tears that filled my eyes. "Maybe you should search everything around the school. Something's out there, and something's taking kids, but it's not us."
"Of course it's not us." Neferet came over to me and put her arm around me, patting my shoulder and making soft mom sounds. "Gentlemen, I think Zoey's had more than enough upsetting for one day. Why don't I introduce you to Shaunee and Erin, who, I'm sure, will collaborate her alibi."
Alibi. The word sounded chilling.
"If you remember anything else, or have any other odd dreams, please don't hesitate to contact me, anytime day or night," Detective Marx said.
This was the second time he'd given me his cardhe certainly was persistent. I took his card from him and thanked him. Then as Neferet led him from the room Detective Marx hesitated and walked back to me.
"My twin sister was Marked and Changed fifteen years ago," he said softly. "She and I are still close, even though she was supposed to forget her human family. So when I say you can call me anytime, and tell me anything, you can believe me. You can also trust me."
"Detective Marx?" Neferet stood in the doorway.
"Just thanking Zoey again, and telling her how sorry I am about her roommate," he said smoothly as he strode from the room.
I stayed where I was, trying to collect my thoughts. Marx's sister was a vampyre? Well, that really wasn't so bizarre. What was bizarre is that he still loved her. Maybe I could trust him.
The door clicked shut and I jerked in surprise. Neferet was standing with her back to it, watching me carefully.
"Did you Imprint with Heath?"
I had an instant of cold, white panic. She was going to be able to read me. I'd been fooling myself. There was no way I was any kind of a match for this High Priestess. Then I felt the brush of a gentle, impossible breezethe warmth of an invisible fire ... the freshness of a spring rainthe green sweetness of a fertile meadow ... and the powerful infilling of elemental strength flowing into my spirit. With new confidence I met Neferet's eyes.
"But you said I didn't. You told me before that what happened between him and me on the wall wasn't enough to Imprint." I made sure my voice sounded confused and upset.
Her shoulders relaxed almost imperceptibly. "I don't think you Imprinted with him then. So, you're saying you haven't been with him since? You haven't fed from him again?"
"Again!" I let myself sound as shocked as I always felt at the disturbing, yet seductive thought of feeding on Heath. "But I didn't really feed on him then, did I?"
"No, no, of course not," Neferet reassured me. "What you did was very minor, very minor indeed. It's just that your dream made me wonder if you'd been with your boyfriend again."
"Ex-boyfriend," I said almost automatically. "No. But he's been texting and calling me a bunch lately, so I thought it would be best if I met him and tried to make him understand, once and for all, that we can't see each other anymore. I'm sorry. I should have told you, but I really did want to solve it myself. I mean, I got myself into the mess. I should be able to handle getting myself out of it."
"Well, I do commend your sense of responsibility, but I don't think it was wise to make the detectives believe your dream might have been a vision."
"It just seemed so real," I said.
"I'm sure it did. Zoey, did you take the medicine I asked you to drink last night?"
"You mean that milky stuff? Yeah, Shaunee gave it to me." And she had, but I'd poured the crap down the sink.
Neferet looked even more relaxed. "Good. If you keep having disturbing dreams, come to me and I'll give you a stronger mixture. That should have kept the nightmares from you, but clearly I underestimated the dosage you required."
The dosage wasn't all she'd underestimated.
I smiled. "Thanks, Neferet. I appreciate that."
"Well, you should return to your friends, now. They are quite protective of you, and I'm sure they're worried."
I nodded and walked with her back to the living room, careful not to show my disgust when she hugged me in front of everyone and said good-bye with the warmth of a mom. Actually, she was exactly like a mom, specifically my mom, Linda Heffer. The woman who had betrayed me for a man and cared more about herself and appearances than she cared about me. The similarities between Neferet and Linda were becoming clearer and clearer.
CHAPTER 27
We resettled in our little group after they left, and didn't say much as the room got back to normal. I noticed no one changed the local station. The Star Wars DVD was forgotten, at least for tonight.
"Are you okay?" Erik finally asked softly. He put his arm back around me and I snuggled against him.
"Yeah, I think so."
"Did the cops have any news about Heath?" Damien asked.
"Nothing more than what we already heard," I said. "Or if they do, they weren't telling me."
"Is there anything we can do?" Shaunee asked.
I shook my head. "Let's just watch local TV and see what the ten o'clock news says."
They mumbled okays and everyone settled in to watch the Will and Grace rerun marathon while we waited for the news. I stared at the TV, and thought about Heath. Did I have a bad feeling about him? Definitely. But was it the same bad feeling I'd had about Chris Ford and Brad Higeons? No, I didn't think so. I didn't know how to explain it. My gut said Heath was in danger, but it wasn't saying that he was dead. Yet.
The more I thought about Heath, the more restless I became. By the time the late news came on I could hardly sit through the stories on the unexpected blizzard that had caused a white-out in Tulsa and the surrounding area. I fidgeted while we watched the shots of downtown and the expressways, eerily empty and looking post-meteor-hit-or-nuclear-war-like.
There was nothing new on Heath except a grim report about how the weather was hampering search efforts.
"I have to go." The words were out of my mouth and I was standing before my mind could remind me that I didn't have a clue where I was going or how I was going to get there.
"Go where, Z?" Erik asked.
My mind flailed around and landed on one thingone little island of contentment in a world that had turned into stress and confusion and madness.
"I'm going to the stables." Erik's look was as blank as everyone else's. "Lenobia said that I could brush Persephone anytime I wanted to." I moved my shoulders. "Brushing her makes me feel calm, and right now I could use some calm."
"Well, okay. I like horses. Let's go groom Persephone," Erik said.
"I need to be alone." The words sounded so much harsher than I'd meant them that I sat back down next to him and slid my hand in his. "I'm sorry. It's just that I need time to think, and that's something I have to do alone."
His blue eyes looked sad, but he gave me a little smile. "How about I walk you to the stable, and then come back here and keep an eye on the news for you till you get through thinking?"
"I'd like that."
I hated the worried looks on my friends' faces, but I couldn't do much to reassure them. Erik and I didn't bother with coats. The stable wasn't far. The cold wouldn't get a chance to bother us.
"This snow is awesome," Erik said after we'd walked a little way down the sidewalk. Someone had attempted to plow it because it was way less deep on the sidewalk than the surrounding grounds, but the snow was coming down so steadily that the plows couldn't keep up with it and it was already up to midcalf on us.
"I kinda remember it snowing like this when I was six or seven. It was during Christmas break and it sucked that we didn't miss any school."
Erik grunted a vague, guylike response, and then we walked on in silence. Usually, our silences weren't awkward, but this one felt weird. I didn't know what to sayhow to make it better.
Erik cleared his throat. "You still care about him, don't you? I mean, as more than just an ex-boyfriend."
"Yes." Erik deserved the truth, and I was totally sick of lies.
We'd come to the stable door, and stopped in the halo of a yellow gaslight. The entryway shielded us from the worst of the snow, so it seemed like we were standing in a bubble inside a snow globe.
"And what about me?" Erik asked.
I looked up at him. "I care about you, too. Erik, I wish I could fix this, make all of the bad stuff go away, but I can't. And I'm not going to lie to you about Heath. I think I've Imprinted him."
I saw the surprise in Erik's eyes. "From just that one time on the wall? Z, I was there, and you hardly tasted any of his blood at all. He just doesn't want to lose you, that's why he's so obsessed. Not that I blame him," he added with a wry smile.
"I saw him again."
"Huh?"
"It was just a couple days ago. I couldn't sleep, so I went to the Starbucks at Utica Square by myself. He was there putting up posters about Brad. I hadn't meant to see him, and if I'd known he was going to be there I wouldn't have gone. I promise you that, Erik."
"But you did see him."
I nodded.
"And you fed from him?"
"Itit just kinda happened. I tried not to, but he cut himself. On purpose. And I couldn't stop myself." I kept my gaze squarely on his, asking him with my eyes to understand. Now that I was actually confronted with the very likely possibility that Erik and I were going to break up, I realized how much I didn't want that to happen, which definitely didn't help my confusion or my stress level because I did still care about Heath. "I'm sorry, Erik. I didn't ask for it to happen, but it did, and now there's this thing between Heath and me, and I'm not sure what I'm going to do about it."
He sighed deeply and brushed some snow off my hair. "Okay, well, there's a thing between you and me, too. And someday, if we make it through this damn Change, we'll be alike. I won't turn into a wrinkled old man and die decades before you will. Being with me won't be something other vampyres will whisper about, and humans will hate you for. It'll be normal. It'll be right." Then his hand was behind my neck and he was pulling me to him. He kissed me hard. He tasted cold and sweet. My arms went up around his shoulders and I kissed him back. At first I just wanted to make the hurt I was causing him go away. Then our kiss deepened, and we pressed our bodies together. I wasn't overwhelmed with blinding bloodlust for him, like what happened when I was with Heath, but I liked the way kissing Erik made me feel, all kinda warm and light-headed. Hell, the bottom line was that I liked him. A lot. Plus, he had a point. He and I would be right together. Heath and I would not.
The kiss ended with both of us breathing hard. I cupped Erik's cheek in my hand. "I really am sorry."
Erik turned his head and kissed my palm. "We'll figure this out."
"I hope so," I whispered, more to myself than him. Then I stepped away from him and put my hand on the old iron doorknob. "Thanks for walking me here. I don't know when I'll be back. You shouldn't wait for me." I started to open the door.
"Z, if you really did Imprint with Heath you might be able to find him," Erik said. I paused and turned back to Erik. He looked strained and unhappy, but he didn't hesitate to explain. "While you're brushing the mare, think about Heath. Call to him. If he's able to, he'll come to you. If he's not and your Imprint is strong enough, you may be able to get an idea of where he is."
"Thank you, Erik."
He smiled, but he didn't look happy. "Later, Z." He walked away and the snow swallowed him.
The warm hay smell mixed with clean, dry horse contrasted dramatically with the cold, snowy outside. The stables were dimly lit by only a couple of soft gaslights. The horses were making sleepy, chewing noises. Some of them were blowing through their noses, which sounded a little like snoring. I looked around for Lenobia while I brushed the snow from my shirt and hair and started toward the tack room, but it was pretty obvious that except for the horses I was alone.
Good. I needed to think, and not explain what I was doing here in the middle of a snowstorm in the middle of the night.
Okay, I'd told Erik the truth about Heath and he hadn't broken up with me. Of course, depending on what happened with Heath, he might still dump me. How did those ho-ish girls go out with a dozen or so guys at the same time? Two was exhausting. Memory of Loren's sexy smile and incredible voice flashed through my guilt-filled mind. I chewed my lip as I grabbed a curry brush and a mane comb. Actually, I'd been kinda sorta seeing three guys, which was utterly insane. I decided then and there that I had enough problems without adding the weird flirting that may or may not be going on between Loren and me into the mix. Just thinking about Erik finding out that I'd shown all that skin to Loren ... I shuddered. It made me want to dump myself. From now on I'd avoid Loren, and if I couldn't avoid him I'd treat him like any other teacher, which meant no flirting. Now if I could just figure out what to do with Erik and Heath.
I opened Persephone's stall and told her what a pretty, sweet girl she was as she gave me a sleepily surprised snort and lipped my face after I kissed her soft nose. She sighed and rested on three feet when I started brushing her.
Okay, no way I could figure out anything about dating Erik and Heath until Heath was safe. (I refused to consider that he might never be safemight never be found alive.) I began to quiet the babble and clutter and confusion that was my mind. Truthfully, I hadn't needed Erik to tell me that I might be able to find Heath. That possibility was one of the many things that had been making me so restless all night. The cowardly truth was that I was afraidafraid of what I might find and what I might not find, and afraid I wouldn't be strong enough to deal with either. Stevie Rae's death had left me broken, and I wasn't sure I was up to saving anybody.
But it wasn't like I had any choice.
So ... thinking of Heath ... I started by remembering what a cute kid he'd been in grade school. In third grade his hair had been lots blonder than it was now, and he'd had like a zillion cowlicks. It used to stand up all over his head like duck fluff. Third grade was when he'd first told me that he loved me and was gonna someday marry me. I'd been in second grade, and I so didn't take him seriously. I mean, even though I was almost two years younger I'd been a foot taller. He was cute, but he was also a boy, which meant he was annoying.
Okay, so he could still be annoying, but he'd grown up and filled out. Somewhere between third and eleventh grade I'd started taking him seriously. I remembered back to the first time he'd really kissed me, and the fluttery, excited way it made me feel. I remembered how sweet he was, and how he could make me feel beautiful, even when I had a terrible cold and my nose was bright red. And how he was an old-fashioned gentleman. Heath had been opening doors and carrying books for me since he was nine.
Then I thought about the last time I'd seen him. He'd been so sure that we belonged together and so unafraid of me that he'd cut himself and offered his blood to me. I closed my eyes and leaned against Persephone's soft flank, thinking of Heath and letting the memories of him drift past my closed lids like a movie screen. Then the images of our past changed and I got a vague sense of darkness and dampness and coldand fear slammed into my gut. I gasped, keeping my eyes tightly closed. I wanted to focus in on him, like I had that one other time when somehow I'd seen him in his bedroom, but this connection between us was different. It was less clear, more filled with dark emotions than playful desire. I concentrated harder, and did what Erik had said to do. I called Heath.
Aloud, as well as with everything inside of me, I said, "Heath, come to me. I'm calling you, Heath. I want you to come to me now. Wherever you are, get out of there and come to me!"
Nothing. There was no answer. No response. No sense of anything more than damp, cold fear. I called again. "Heath! Come to me!" This time I felt a surge of frustration, followed by despair. But I didn't get an image of him. I knew he couldn't come to me, but I didn't know where he was.
Why had I been able to see him so much more easily before? How had I done it? I'd been thinking about Heath then, just like I had been now. I'd been thinking about ...
What had I been thinking about? Then I felt my cheeks get hot as I realized what had drawn me to him before. I hadn't been thinking about how cute a kid he'd been or how pretty he made me feel. I'd been thinking about drinking his blood ... feeding from him ... and the red-hot bloodlust that caused.
Okay, well then ...
I drew a deep breath and thought about Heath's blood. It tasted like liquid desire, hot and thick and electric. It made my body burst alive in places that had only begun to rouse before. And those places were starving. I wanted to drink Heath's sweet blood while he satisfied my yearning for his touch, his body, his taste
The disjointed image I had of darkness cleared with an abruptness that was shocking. It was still dark, but that was no problem for my night vision. At first I didn't understand what I was seeing. The room was weird. It was more like a little alcove in a cave or a tunnel than a room. The walls were round and damp. There was some light, but it was coming from a dim, smoky lantern that hung from a rusted hook. Everything else was complete darkness. What I thought at first was a pile of dirty clothes moved and moaned. This time it wasn't just a threadlike feeler I was looking through. It was actually as if I was floating, and when I recognized the moan my hovering body drifted over to him.
He was curled up on a stained mattress. His hands and ankles were duct taped together and he was bleeding from several slashes on his neck and arms.
"Heath!" My voice wasn't audible, but his head snapped up as if I'd just yelled at him.
"Zoey? Is that you?" And then his eyes widened and he sat straight up, looking wildly around. "Get out of here, Zoey! They're crazy. They'll kill you like they did Chris and Brad." And he started to struggle, trying desperately to break the tape, even though all that was happening was he was making his already raw wrists bleed.
"Heath, stop! It's okayI'm okay. I'm not here, not really." He stopped struggling and squinted around him like he was trying to see me.
"But I can hear you."
"Inside your head. That's where you hear me, Heath. It's because we've Imprinted and now we're linked."
Unexpectedly, Heath grinned. "That's cool, Zo."
I gave a mental eye roll. "Okay, Heath, focus. Where are you?"
"You won't believe this, Zo, but I'm under Tulsa."