Jenna took another sip of tea and spilled another drop on the pretty table. She jerked up her napkin, but it seemed too pretty to use. Uncertain, her hand hovered over the table.
Jenna, her sister said, laughing, its a table, for Gods sake. Its meant for spills. So is that napkin youre staring at in horror. She sobered as she regarded a very nervous Jenna. Whats the matter? I mean, I realize we havent seen each other in forever, but youre sojumpy. Like youre just waiting for me to get upset over something.
I Jenna broke off with a sigh, biting back her apology. She felt as though she was always apologizing for something, and it had to stop.
Didnt it?
She scrubbed at the spot on the table as if her life depended on it.
Kristen laid a hand on hers, stilling the movement.
I love the way you look, Kristen said gently when Jenna didnt say anything. Is that it, honey? Are you upset about that? Youre beautiful, now more than ever.
I was never beautiful. But she was now and she knew it. Her mirror told her it was true. But it seemed strange to be so suddenly pretty. And I have scars.
Theyre nothing, considering what youve been through, and besides, theyre hardly noticeable the way you put your makeup on.
Its not the way I look. Though Jenna hadnt gotten quite used to seeing herself. She still gave a start whenever she saw her reflection in the mirror.
What then?
Youre different, Jenna said in a low voice, avoiding her sisters gaze. Friendlier, which is really nice, she hurried on to say, but it was too late.
Kristen stiffened, then slowly straightened, dropping her hand to her lap. I see what it is, she said quietly. Youre thinking about how it used to be, how we never got along because I was always trying
To make me a better person, Jenna said urgently, meaning it. I see it now-
No, you dont. You cant understand because I never told you. Kristen sighed heavily. I used to be so hard on you, hoping Mom would let up if
If I was more like you?
Maybe youre not the only one who has changed, Kristen said softly. Maybe Ive learned to accept people for who they are.
You were trying to help. Wonder filled Jenna as she mulled this over. You never hated me-you were trying to protect me. A warm feeling prevailed, and it felt good, so very good, to let go of the past. I do understand.
Do you? Kristens eyes filled with tears. Do you know how much I loved you, still love you, how I always wished I could make you believe it? She reached across the table, grasped Jennas hands and held tight. How desperately afraid I was for you, especially when I couldnt reach through that angry barrier to get to the real Jenna? She drew a ragged breath and blinked her tears away. I wanted my sister, Jenna, and I couldnt get her. I had to stand around and watch you try to destroy yourself, and it killed me.
Im sor-
Do you think I dont know how Mom treated you? How she loved me best? God! I hated that. I still dont understand it, but I never meant for it to be that way. When I realized I couldnt change you, I used to do everything I could to make her hate me so shed like you more, but nothing worked. Nothing. And by the time we were old enough to talk about it, you were gone from me.
Im-
Dont you dare apologize, Kristen practically shouted, rising from her chair and pulling Jenna from hers. I dont want you to be sorry. I just want you back. She placed a hand to her chest as if she ached. I want you back in my life, because you never left my heart.
Jenna swallowed hard, but the tears came, anyway. Before she could let out the muffled sob, Kristen had her in her arms.
Itll work out, Kristen promised, rocking them both. Itll all work out.
How?
With faith.
Jenna wanted to believe that. Oh, how she wanted to. I dont have much of that, she admitted.
Its okay. I have enough for both of us.
Their hug tightened and it felt so good, so right. Jenna closed her eyes and held on for all she was worth.
I love you, Jenna, Kristen whispered fiercely. I love you so much.
It was the first time in far too many years Jenna had heard those words. Shed never said them out loud before and wasnt sure she could now, but she continued to hold on, soaking up all the love she could get.
Stone squared his shoulders, gritted his teeth and came shockingly close to putting his fist through the wall of his office. I realize she doesnt want to take any calls right now. He refrained from adding an unflattering oath to the man claiming to be his parents butler. But she might change her mind.
I doubt it, sir.
And just who the hell still had a butler in the 1990s? Stone wondered.
Shes in mourning, sir.
Mourning. Hed discovered he was, too, even for a brother whod written him out of his life with an ease that still disturbed Stone.
It didnt stop the grief any. Just tell her its her son, Stone suggested tightly, eyeing the clock and feeling thankful he still had three hours before Sara got home from school.
God help him, he needed a break from the child whod had nonstop questions flowing from her mouth since the day before, when hed learned about Richard.
Why is he dead, shed asked. Why didnt he ever want to talk to you when you called? Why didnt he answer your letters?
And why are you crying, Daddy?
Yeah, he needed a break. Sinking onto the stool in front of the counter, he rested his head in one hand. His other hand still gripped the phone.
Who is this? that horrible flat voice questioned.
I told you, he replied carefully. Her son.
Her son has passed on.
Her other son, Stone grated. Im sure shell remember. Was he sure? Seemed she hadnt remembered his past ten birthdays. The past ten Christmases. Saras past nine birthdays.
Who is this? that horrible flat voice questioned.
I told you, he replied carefully. Her son.
Her son has passed on.
Her other son, Stone grated. Im sure shell remember. Was he sure? Seemed she hadnt remembered his past ten birthdays. The past ten Christmases. Saras past nine birthdays.
Dammit, he was furious all over again, at himself and his parents.
For Sara, he reminded himself, repeating it like a mantra. This is for Sara, so swallow the pride and just do it.
Please. A muscle in his jaw worked. Please tell her Stone is on the line. Stone Cameron.
While silence filled the air, Stone set his hot forehead down on the cool counter.
He was an idiot. An idiot who loved his daughter beyond reason, enough to try to give her the family shed always wanted.
Im sorry, sir, came that damn voice.
The outer door, the one to his shop, opened. A minute later his office door opened behind him, and before it shut again, he caught that light sexy scent he would forever equate with one woman.
Cindy.
From behind, she lightly touched him, set her hand on his shoulder, and just that simply, some of his burden lifted. He couldnt explain it any better than that, even to himself, but he wouldnt hide from it.
What do you mean, youre sorry? Stone said into the phone. He didnt turn to face Cindy, but reached up and grabbed her hand.
She held on and squeezed. Then stepped closer so that he could feel the heat of her body against his back. It comforted him as little else could have.
Mrs. Cameron refuses to take the call, the butler said. Youre not to call here again.
Betrayal slashed through him, chilling him. Hurt had a taste, he discovered. Bitter as hell.
Did you hear me? asked the butler, his voice a bit louder. Please do not call here again.
Behind Stone, Cindy stiffened, her anger and shock flowing through her to him as she clearly heard the words through the receiver.
For some reason, that gave Stone strength. Itd been a long time since hed felt someone on his side. For years hed been alone in this, alone against the world in his fight to survive with Sara.
Shes unbelievable, Stone muttered beneath his breath. Unbelievable.
Goodbye, sir.
The funeral, Stone said quickly before he was hung up on. When is the- At the disconnecting click, he shook his head, then slowly set the phone down.
Cindy held him close, and he was enveloped by her as well as her welcome compassion.
Im here, she whispered. Just like I promised you I would be. Isit enough?
More than enough, he whispered back, and turning, he wrapped her slight body in his arms.
Chapter 6
He wasnt ever going to let go, Stone thought as Cindy pressed close to him. Desperate, a little needy, he held her tighter, closing his eyes in relief when she clung to him, just as needy.
Let me be here for you, Stone.
A buzzing in his head nearly drowned out her words.
Richard was gone, truly gone.
His mother refused to acknowledge her only living son.
Sara and her precious childhood threatened because he hadnt provided properly for her future.
So much-his mind couldnt take it all in. And then there was this warm, caring woman looking at him as if he were her entire world. As if she could make him forget everything bad. As if she alone could make his life perfect.
How to resist that?
Youre so strong all the time. Her dark solemn eyes blinked at him. Cupping his face, she met his gaze. talking care of everyone but yourself.
Im okay. But hed started to shake with the effort to remain in control.
She continued to touch him, softly, tenderly-and it was so damn irresistible. Let me do it for once, she whispered. Let me be the strong one for you. You deserve that, Stone. Just let go.
His heart beat so hard and fast that it almost hurt. His throat was tight, but he managed a strangled Im okay.
It was a lie, a damn lie, and she saw right through it.
No, she murmured. Youre hurting, and I cant bear to see it. She met his gaze, hers strong and sure and confident in a way hed never seen before. Let me give you this. She ran her hands over his chest, a light tentative touch that inflamed him so his hurt turned into something else. Let me
She could have no idea how just the thought of making love to her, here, now, had his blood humming. Yet it wasnt his usual style, using sex to forget the harsh reality of his world. And he refused to use her that way. I dont-
Her fingers brushed his mouth, holding his words in as she shook her head slightly. Let me.
And there, in his daze of grief and hunger, he saw it, the flicker of hesitation, the brief flash of emotion that told him she wasnt nearly as sure and brave as shed like to be, but was trying her damnedest to hide it from him.