Stone-
I dont want to hear it. Unless, of course, youre ready to stop lying and tell me the truth.
I didnt lie.
The hell you didnt. His voice lowered, dripping with rage and sarcasm. You lied every time you looked at me and let me think you were another woman. Every time you spoke or smiled, it was a lie. His face darkened. Every time you touched me, let me touch you a damn lie.
No, she said. It was wrong not to tell you right away, I know that. But the rest, oh, Stone, the rest. It was the only truth in my life. Please believe me.
Youll have to excuse me, he said politely, with a chill that frightened her, if I dont ever believe another word you say.
When weat your office Her breath escaped her when his expression changed, going from fury to anguish in less than a heartbeat. Im sorry, she whispered. I wanted to tell you before we did, but
But it was such wild animal sex you couldnt catch your breath enough to enlighten me?
Dont. His anger sparked her own. Dont belittle it like that. We made-
Wrong. Love is when two people are being honest. You dont know the meaning of the word.
Oh, he knew how to cut deep. You can call it whatever you want, she told him shakily. But what we did in your office wasnt some cheap one-night stand. It wasnt just animal sex. It was
When she fell silent, he arched his brow, daring her to continue.
Damn him for being so stubborn. It was
You havent changed much, Jenna. Still cant use the L-word. He let out a short harsh laugh. Its called love, and you know what? I dont expect you to understand it. He shook his head in disgust. Well, now I get the secrecy about your past-you couldnt have been more vague. And why you kept forgetting to answer to your own name-that threw me. But refusing to take off your clothes until the lights were off. Hell, that makes perfect sense now. Of course you wanted the dark. He wrenched himself around, away from her. This is pretty unbelievable, even for you.
I had no choice.
Oh, thats right. I hauled you out of anonymity, forcing you away from that basketball game to have pizza. Then I twisted your arm, making you continue to have contact with me. Which you just hated, right?
At his hard unrelenting glare, she swallowed. Of course not. But-
Just go.
I wont, she said firmly, though her voice trembled. Not until you listen. I intended to tell you who I was, but-
But what? It was so much more fun to torture me?
There was far more than his rage here, which was what gave her the courage to continue to face him down. Shimmering behind his anger was a deeper, more frightening emotion-unbearable pain. I was afraid, she adnutted.
That stopped him, for it wasnt what hed expected her to say. All of a sudden just looking at her nearly brought him to his knees. He had no idea how he could feel so much anger, so much pain, so much need for her all at the same time.
But he did.
Shed asked if he could see the real her. Oh, yeah, he could see her clearly now. Agonizingly so.
Uncertain blue eyes that wrenched at his gut. A mouth made to drive a man crazy, he thought as he watched her chew on her lower lip. It was seeing the little things after so long that nearly blew him away. Such as the way she was wringing her hands, just as she always did when anxious or nervous.
God, it was her. Jenna.
The woman whod haunted him for ten long years.
It was impossible to divide the pain and rage; they just mingled, the emotion crushing him until he could hardly breathe.
You were afraid. He laughed coldly, even as his heart squeezed at the look of utter dejection on her face. Not that I believe you, but of what?
You was the wrenching reply.
You couldnt have thought I would hurt you-you know better than that, he said quietly, stung.
No. I was afraid youd turn me away.
Why would you think that? Youre the one who left.
And you know why.
Yes. Because you were a coward.
She flinched and he felt like the biggest jerk on earth, which didnt improve his temper. You acted like a child, he said.
I was!
Not completely. Stone derived no satisfaction when she blushed and turned away. You didnt trust me.
Dont you see? she cried, throwing up her hands and turning back. I didnt trust anyone.
What I see, he said carefully, coming closer, is someone too wrapped up in herself to care what she did to others when she left.
Fire spit out her eyes. Fire and tears, which he refused to allow to soften him.
Youre being unfair, Stone.
Am I? he asked softly, completely unprepared for her taking that last step between them.
Without warning she poked a hard finger into his chest, punctuating each word with a stab. Dont you get it? I hated everyone. Everyone. I hated
He grabbed her hand, but she just stabbed him with the other. I hated my mother, my sister
Stone caught her other hand and they grappled for a moment, before she collapsed against him completely.
I hated myself, she admitted hoarsely. Just hated myself.
Trying to remain unmoved was difficult, because he was moved, dammit. And he didnt want to be. Gripping her upper arms, he held her away from him, unable to deal with the pull of their physical attraction at the same time as all this hot steaming rage. You ran away, instead of dealing with it. You left us. You forgot about me, about your daughter, and you left.
She broke away, shoving at him. Yes. Yes, I ran away. I was a jerk. God! Do you think I need you to remind me? Plunging her fingers into her short hair, she turned from him. Not a day has gone by when I havent thought of it. When I havent wondered how I could have handled it differently, how my life would be now if I had.
So what now? he asked wearily, sinking into a chair. Why are you here?
Well, at least youre not asking me to leave anymore. She shot him a hesitant half smile.
Dont, he said, closing his eyes to that hopeful expression on her beautiful face. He couldnt take it. Dont think Im over it. You lied. You made me feel for you again, dammit, and I didnt want to.
I dont want you to get over me.
I got over what I felt for you as Jenna a long time ago, he assured her flatly, hardening himself to her pain. Now tell me the truth for once. Why are you here after all this time? Bored? Or do you just want to mess with some more lives?
She looked at him through tears and regret, and again he had to remind himself to remain unmoved. This wasnt Cindy, the woman he had thought he was falling in love with. This was Jenna, the woman hed sworn never to forgive.
I want to right my wrongs.
You want in on Saras life.
That, too.
No, he said firmly, shaking his head and tightening his jaw until his teeth hurt. No way.
Her mouth worked, but it took a moment for her to get the words out. Why not?
Youll hurt her-
Never!
-again, he finished.
No, I wont. Please, she beseeched softly, her eyes huge. Just listen to me.
Oh, please, he growled, shoving away from the table to pace the floor. Dont even try to tell me you wont run off when the going gets tough. And believe me, with a ten-year-old, it can get quite difficult. I wont have you hurt her. No possible way.
But I can explain- She followed his wild pacing, jumping when he turned so fast he nearly bowled her over.
Can you explain why you stayed away for ten years?
A year ago, I-
Not a year, Jenna, ten years. He folded his arms over his chest, blocking himself off from her. The minute she opened her mouth to speak, he interrupted her, unable to keep his tongue. God, what an idiot I am. Asking about your past, about your parents. About you. Not Cindy, you!
No! Its different, Im not that same girl you once knew. I think differently. I react differently. I-
Is that right? he interrupted her. I dont think so, Jenna. To me, you acted pretty predictably.
Let me tell you all of it. Then maybe youll see. Once again she touched the side of her face, covering the faint web of scars.
Stones gaze followed the movement. Id let you tell me, Jenna, because I imagine its quite an amazing story. But to tell you the truth, Im not interested in where you were and what you were doing while I was here raising our daughter.
Im so sorry.
If thats true, you couldnt have stayed away so long.
What scared me so much ten years ago has not changed. We were soulmates then, and we still are. We are, she insisted when he turned from her. And now youre the scared one.
For a minute Stone couldnt answer, couldnt even move. She was right on that score, he thought bitterly. Hed given both heart and soul to that seventeen-year-old girl, and he was terrified at how close hed come to giving them to the grown Jenna ten years later.
Hed allowed her to nearly destroy him-again.
Apparently she was willing to pull on whatever heartstrings she could reach in order to railroad him into falling for this act of hers. Hed felt that light touch of hers on his back, felt his body react to it, and the memory further ignited his anger.
Hed allowed her to nearly destroy him-again.
Apparently she was willing to pull on whatever heartstrings she could reach in order to railroad him into falling for this act of hers. Hed felt that light touch of hers on his back, felt his body react to it, and the memory further ignited his anger.
Please, Stone, if I ever meant anything to you, please listen to me now. Let me tell you my story, and then well go from there.
God, no. If he did, if he allowed himself to look into her fathomless eyes and listen to her husky emotion-riddled voice, if he allowed himself to feel for her again, she would finish off the job shed nearly accomplished the last time.
Stone.
He could hear her fear, her utter vulnerability, and he didnt want to. Holding on to his anger like a drowning man, he ignored her. He went directly to the back door and jerked it open.
Standing there holding it, he silently invited her to go out into the cold night and leave him alone.
Thats it? she asked incredulously. You find out who I am, you decide you dont like it much, and youre done? Just like that?
Yep.
Youre not being fair.
Lets not get started on that issue, Jenna. He said her name as if it were a filthy word.
I have things to tell you.
Too late. I want you to get out.
His face was hard, closed off to any emotion except anger. He wasnt going to listen. He was going to kick her out, and every nightmare shed ever had was about to come true.
Failure rose up and nearly strangled her. Slowly, hoping hed say or do something, anything, to stop her, she walked toward the door. On the threshold, sandwiched between the warm cozy kitchen and the cold night air, she stopped and looked at him.