There were just a few tiny differences in these circumstances, though.
Hed always meant those offers.
And the sudden advent of the baby in Winonas life was obviously deeply affecting her. Shed never admitted that she needed help with anything-and for damn sure, shed never given him the opportunity to come through for her in any way. Justin didnt quite comprehend all the emotional ramifications for her with this baby, but he was dead positive of one thing. Hed been waiting for a chance-any chance-with her for years now. And he wasnt about to let it go.
Okay, lets do it, he said lightly.
For the first time all evening, the haunted tension left her eyes and she laughed. Really laughed. Sure. Nothing to it, right? Just get a license and hit the Justice of the Peace. Just what you were dying to do this week.
Actually, it sounds like a lot of fun to me. He leaned back, as if he could find nothing more important to do than stretch out his long legs.
She was still laughing. I can just see the headlines in the social column on Sunday. Royals Most Eligible Bachelor Finally Cuffed By A Cop. And Im sure thered be some comments about the bride having to give up her six-year-old Jeep and suffer driving your Porsche-not to mention having to face up to all the trials of suddenly being filthy rich-
Shut up, Win. I know you were joking, but why dont you think about it? You sounded really serious to me about wanting to keep this baby.
I was. I ambut holy mackerel, Justin, I never meant it about getting married. It was just a joke. It wouldnt even solve anything, because Angels mother could show up at any time. Today, even. Or tomorrow-
And maybe she wont ever show. But even if she knocks on your door in a matter of hours, the courts wouldnt just let her have the baby back. Isnt that what you were just explaining? That its not automatic that the mother would get Angel back-not after abandoning her the way she did. It wasnt hard for Justin to fill in the blanks when Wins fears were right in her eyes giving him easy clues what to say. So no matter what, Angel is going to be housed somewhere for a while-and that could be a long while. Long enough to make a difference in her life, if shes in a good situation. Or a bad one.
I know, I know. Thats exactly whats driving me crazy. She scraped a hand through her hair, making the curls spring up in tufts. She faced him, her eyes so fierce. Soft-fierce. I cant stand worrying that shed be put in a bad place for her. All I really want is to be able to take care of her until we know for sure whats what in her life. I know that Ill love her. And that almost anythings better than being thrown into the limbo of foster care. The overcrowding. The never knowing how long you can stay in one place or another. I cant stand it. I know thats irrational and emotional and stupid, but Ive been there, Justin. And I hate it that that could happen to Angel, to this baby. I know its nuts, I-
Win, I dont really give a damn if its nuts or not. If I understood what you told me earlier, theyd consider you for temporary guardian, if you were married. Is that true or not true?
True. Actually, its true that they would consider me anyway-but Id almost certainly get turned down right now. I dont know of any circumstances where a single womans been allowed to foster. Not here. Its always a two-parent family-
So lets get married.
She tried to answer and ended up sputtering on another bubble of laughter. She laughed harder. Then quit. Then hiccuped.
Hed never seen Winona undone before. Had no idea she could be-at least by him.
When he lifted a hand, he knew he intended to kiss her. When his fingers touched her cheek, pushed back, so gently, into her hair, cupping her head toward himhe knew what he was doing then, too. Sort of. He sure as hell knew how to kiss a woman.
But hed never kissed Winona before. Any kind of kiss. Any way. Possibly because hed known that even one small kiss was never going to be simple. Not with her. Not for him.
She wasnt expecting the kiss, because her forehead puckered in a frown and her eyes widened in surprise and confusion when he kept coming closer. But when his fingers laced in her hair, she didnt move. When his mouth honed in on hers, she didnt pull away. She went as still as a statue.
But nothing about Win resembled a cold statue. She tasted fragile. Soft. Warm. Alluring.
She made a small sound when his mouth touched hers, tasted, came back for more. Win rarely wore perfumes, yet he suddenly felt surrounded by her scents. Her tongue still carried the echo of the vanilla cappuccino hed made her. Her hair was a tumble of springy, unruly curls, threaded with that hint of strawberry shampoo she used. And she was always slathering cream on her face and hands because her skin was so dry, and that was the other scent. Almonds. Vanilla. Strawberry. All edible stuff.
Like her.
She made another sound, and her fingers suddenly clutched his arm, as if to push him away. Only she didnt push him away, and beneath his mouth, her lips were suddenly moving, trembling like a whisper, her eyelashes swooshing down as if the light in the room were suddenly too bright. The TV flashed on a news interruption, which technically theyd both been rabidly interested in earlier. Now, he didnt look up, and neither did she.
Those first exploring kisses turned deeper, silkier, sexier. The fingers clutching his arm suddenly wound, tight and hard, around his neck. Tongues tangled, tangoed. He kissed and kept on kissing, but now he could feel her skin heating, feel her body yielding, bowing to his on an angry groan of a sigh. He heard the anger in that groan, and a thousand years from now-when he had time-hed want to smile. Win had had no idea shed feel desire with him.
Neither had he. Hed been pretty sure, for years now, that his panting after her had all been one-sided. Yeah, there was a kind of love. The way you could love a brother at the same time you smacked him upside the head. The way you loved an old friend who knew your childhood secrets. It was good love. All love was good love. But it wasnt man-woman love.
It wasnt heat like a volcano, and a hurricane rush, and wanting that could claw you from the inside out, if you let it.
He wanted to let it. He wanted to peel that big sweatshirt off her and bow her back into the couch cushions, into the shadows, and dunk her in sensuality so deep, so hot, that neither of them could get up until it was over. He wanted to see her naked. To touch her naked. To have her naked.
But there was a sleeping baby only three feet away. And these few potent kisses were suddenly raising questions that Justin never thought hed get the chance to ask. Fire or no fire, need or no need, he was afraid of losing the answers he wanted if he moved too fast.
So he eased up on that last kiss. Tried to remember how to breathe normally. Smoothed his hand back up above her neck. Pressed his forehead to her forehead, eyes closed, loving how she was huffing like a freight train, too.
And that helped him relax. And smile. Hey, WinIm richer than Croesus. You did know that, didnt you?
And that helped him relax. And smile. Hey, WinIm richer than Croesus. You did know that, didnt you?
Her eyes were still more liquid than a lake, but she gave him a short frown, expressing confusion. Am I supposed to care about that?
Yeah. Because it matters. It matters because I can put a marriage together faster than most people. And get those temporary guardian papers going through the legal system. You want this baby? We can make it happen.
Justin She swallowed, hard, when he lurched to his feet.
Hed already heard the baby stir. He pushed into shoes, glanced around for his jacket, but then he met her eyes again. Those soft, liquid-as-a-lake-blue eyes. Liquid for him. For the first time in all these years, liquid for him. I dont know about you and me. But weve known each other forever, Winona. And again, Ive got the money, the resources to put this together fast. The resources to make it easy for both of us-to get in, to get out, to do whatever we both want to do. Theres no woman in my wings. Is there a man in yours?
She blinked. No.
Come on. I need you to be frank with me. There has to be some guy-
No.
Well, hell. He couldnt hold back a grin. He ruffled her curls, grabbed his jacket and let himself out. And yeah, hed left the proposal hanging between them. But there was no way Winona Raye would ever-in this life-give him a yes on the spur of the wild moment like that.
By his leaving right then, hed given her no chance to say no.
That wasnt just progress. As far as Justin was concerned, it was damn close to manna from heaven.
Snuggling the baby more securely on her shoulder, Winona paced the house from window to window. Justins satin-black Porsche had disappeared from her driveway an hour ago, but she kept looking out anyway. Maybe his visit had been a mirage. Or maybe hed put a drug in her coffee-because something had dropped her off in Oz for a few hours, for darn sure.
Angel let out a sleepy burp, making Winona smile. Still, she kept on pacing and patting, pacing and patting. Really, her brief sojourn into Oz was downright funny. Shed actually imagined Justin seriously asking her to marry him. Not joking this time. But low-down serious.
Boy, was that funny.
So funny that even after the baby fell asleep big time-for the night, she hoped-Winona still couldnt think, couldnt breathe, couldnt sleep. She was as tired as a worn-out hound, yet still pacing the floors in the dark.
Hed asked if there was a man in her life. And simply couldnt seem to credit her avowal that there wasnt.
At midnight, she prowled to the refrigerator for some milk-poured out a half a cup, all she had in the house-and carted it back to her bedroom. She climbed in between the cobalt-blue sheets and mounded the pillows behind her head, sipping, staring out the windows at a lovers moon and a sky full of stars.
Thered been men. But not in a while. Once shed realized that shed been the one screwing up the relationships, shed backed off from trying. She wasnt any good at getting close-not in the sack or out of it. Sex wasnt the only problem, but it was a nuisance of a big one. She had no objections to intimacy, getting naked, big inhibitions, nothing like that.
Shed just figured, a long time back, that her sweat with intimacy was about abandonment. Being abandoned once in a lifetime was enough. If you had your soul ripped out once, most sane people didnt volunteer for a repeat experience. But when that translated into a relationshipwell. She could lie there beneath a guy. Smile. Make the right movements. Make the right groans.