S,and herdown witha kidney
stonebigastheHopeDiamond.So Igive herhalf a
Vagaminandtellher,"Youcan'texpect toomuch re-
lief....Shutupawready.Iwantaenjoymymedica-
tions.
"Stoleanopiumsuppositoryoutofmy grandmother's
ass."
Thehypochondriaclassoesthepasser-byandadmin-
isters a straitjacket and starts talking abouthis rotting
septum:"Anawfulpurulent dischargeis subjectto How
out... just wait till you see it."
He doesa striptease tooperation scars,guiding the
reluctantfingersofavictim."Feelthatsuppurated
swellinginmygroinwhereIgotthelymphogranu-
lomas....AndnowIwantyoutopalpatemy internal
hemorrhoids."
(Thereferenceistolymphogranuloma,"climactic
i
buboes." Avirus venerealdisease indigenousto Ethio-
pia."Notfornothingare weknown asfeelthy Ethi-
opians," sneersan Ethiopianmercenary ashe sodomizes
Pharaoh,venomousastheKing's cobra.Ancient Egyp-
tianpapyrustalkallthetimeaboutthemfeelthy
Ethiopians.
So it started inAddis Ababalike theJersey Bounce,
butthesearemoderntimes, OneWorld. Nowthe cli-
macticbuboesswellupinShanghaiandEsmeraldas,
NewOrleansandHelsinki,SeattleandCapetown. But
the heartturns homeand thedisease showsa distinct
predilectionforNegroes,isin factthe whitehaired
boyofwhitesupremacists.ButtheMauMauvoodoo
men are said to be cooking up areal dillyof aVD for
thewhite folks.Not thatCaucasians areimmune: five
British sailors contracted thedisease inZanzibar. And
inDeadCoonCounty,Arkansas ("BlackestDirt, Whit-
est People in the U.S.A.-- Nigger, Don'tLet TheSun Set
OnYouHere")theCountyCoronercomedownwith
thebuboesforeandaft.Avigilantecommitteeof
neighborsapologeticallyburnedhimto deathin the
CourtHouseprivy whenhis interestingcondition came
to light. "Now,Clem, justthink ofyourself asa cow
with theaftosa." "Ora poltroonwith thefowl pest."
"Don't crowd too close, boys.His intestinesis subject
to explode in the fire."The diseasein shortarm hath
agimmickfor goingplaces unlikecertain unfortunate
viruseswhoarefatedtolanguishunconsummatein
the guts of a tick ora junglemosquito, orthe saliva
ofadyingjackal slobberingsilver underthe desert
moon.
And after an initial lesion at the pointof infee-
tion the disease passes to the lymph glands ofthe groin,
whichswellandburstinsuppuratingfissures, drain
fordays,months,years,a purulentstringy discharge
streakedwithbloodandputridlymph.Elephantiasis
of the genitals is a frequentcomplication, andcases of
gangrenehavebeenrecordedwheretheamputation
inmedio ofthe patientfrom thewaist downwas indi-
catedbuthardlyworthwhile.Womenusuallysuffer
secondaryinfectionoftheanus.Maleswhoresign
themselves upfor passiveintercourse toinfected part-
nerslikeweakandsoontobepurple-assed baboons,
may also nourish a little stranger. Initialproctitis and
theinevit4ble purulentdischarge --which maypass un-
noticed in theshuRe --is followedby strictureof the
rectumrequiring interventionof anapple coreror its
surgicalequivalent,lesttheunfortunatepatientbe
reducedtofartand shitin histeeth givingrise to
stubborncasesofhalitosisand unpopularitywith all
sexes,agesand conditionsof homosapiens. Infact a
blindbuggerwasdesertedbyhisseeingeyepolice
dog--copper atheart. Untilquite recentlythere was
nosatisfactorytreatment."Treatmentissymptomatic"
--whichmeansinthetradethereis none.Now many
casesyieldto intensivetherapy withaureomycin, ter-
ramycinandsomeofthenewermolds.Howevera
certainappreciablepercentageremainrefractoryas
mountaingorillas....So,boys,whenthosehot licks
playoveryourballsandprick anddart upyour ass
likeaninvisibleblueblow torchof orgones,in the
wordsofI.B.Watson, Think.Stop pantingand start
palpating...andifyoupalpateabubodrawyour-
self back in and say ina coldnasal whine:"You think
I am innarested to contactyour horribleold condition?
I am not innarested at all.")
RockandRoll adolescenthoodlums stormthe streets
ofallnations.Theyrush intothe Louvreand throw
acidinthe MonaLisa's face.They openzoos, insane
asylums,prisons,burst watermains withair hammers,
chop the floorout ofpassenger planelavatories, shoot
out lighthouses, file elevator cablesto onethin wire,
turnsewersintothewatersupply, throwsharks and
stingrays,electriceelsandcandiruinto swimming
pools(thecandiruisa smalleel-like fishor worm
aboutone-quarterinchthroughandtwoincheslong
patronizing certain rivers of illrepute inthe Greater
Amazon Basin,will dartup yourprick oryour asshole
orawoman'scuntfautedemieux, andhold himself
therebysharpspines withprecisely whatmotives is
not knownsince noone hasstepped forwardto observe
the candiru's life-cycle insito), innautical costumes
ramtheQueenMaryfull speedinto NewYork Harbor,
playchickenwithpassengerplanesandbusses, rush
into hospitals in white coats carrying saws andaxes and
scalpels three feetlong; throwparalytics outof iron
lungs(mimictheir suffocationsflopping abouton the
floor androlling theireyes up),administer injections
withbicycle pumps,disconnect artificialkidneys, saw
awomaninhalfwithatwo-mansurgicalsaw, they
drive herds of squealingpigs intothe Curb,they shit
onthe floorof theUnited Nationsand wipetheir ass
with treaties, pacts, alliances.