I have a pretty good idea what Olivia is up to.
You want to let me in on the secret?
Rod smacked his lips and grinned. No. Ill let this one play itself out.
Josh frowned. His father and Mrs. G. were up to something. Rachel was the only girl Rod had ever approved of and Mrs. G., of course, loved her. But no amount of matchmaking was going to work. Youre a nut.
Rod wiggled his brows. Takes one to know one.
Josh smiled. He loved his father and was thankful hed agreed to live with him and Griff when they moved into this house. Dad, what am I going to do with you?
Rod laughed. Hey, dont forget to call the station.
Thanks.
Sleep well, son. I have a feeling youll need your strength tomorrow.
Josh shook his head in exasperation. He didnt relish disappointing Mrs. G. and his father, but nothing could bring him and Rachel back together. Their needs, their wants in life were too different. Rachel wanted success, prestige and a position of power. He wanted a stable, secure life with a woman who loved him enough to commit to him.
And Rachel wasnt that woman.
Rachel shielded her eyes against the sunlight streaming through the curtains of Mom G.s hospital room. She blinked several times, trying to moisten her gritty eyes. Shed spent the night sitting beside Mom G.s bed, too afraid to leave. She didnt want to get a middle-of-the-night call or find an empty bed in the morning. By staying, Rachel hoped she could keep death from claiming Mom G.
She listened to Mom G.s labored breathing. Helplessness swamped her, making her head pound and her chest hurt. There had to be something more she could do.
She heard the door open. Expecting Josh, she fortified her nerves against his powerful presence and slowly turned around. The sight of a tall, older gentleman dressed in faded jeans and a dark patterned flannel shirt sent surprised pleasure coursing through her.
Rod, she exclaimed softly. She glanced at Mom G., who still slept, then stood and went to the man who, for a time, had been the closest shed ever come to having a father.
His infectious grin filled her with fondness. He hugged her for a long moment and she savored the steady comfort.
Here, now. He drew back to look at her. Its good to see you.
And its good to see you. She noticed his hair had turned a very distinguished gray and the crinkles around the corners of his hazel eyes had deepened. How are you?
As ornery as ever.
Some things never change, she teased.
He looked past her toward the bed. Hows she?
She had a rough night. The chemo took a lot of her strength.
He shook his head. Such a shame.
It is. Rachel knew Mom G. would be going on to a better place, but she didnt want her to go. She didnt want to think about the hole Mom G.s death would leave in her life. Even though theyd been physically apart, Rachel took strength from both the knowledge that Mom G. loved her and from her weekly phone calls. Mom G. had always been there for her.
Olivias very proud of you, Rachel.
His words brought her pleasure. Mom G. had always encouraged and supported her goals. But the little girl she kept locked inside shook with dread. She was scared to be alone. What am I going to do, Rod?
He hugged her close again. What are we all going to do? Shes been a rock in all of our lives.
Rachel nodded, remembering how fond Mom G. was of Rod. Rachel had always wondered if their relationship went beyond friendship. Neither would admitat least not to anyone elseto anything deeper nor act on it.
Speculatively she glanced at Rod. You two are close, arent you?
His eyes twinkled despite an obvious sadness. Yes, we are.
How close?
Close enough. He winked.
You A noise from the bed made her pause. Mom G.s eyes were open.
Shes awake. Rachel breathed out a sigh of relief, thankful sleep hadnt turned into a coma. Each time Mom G. closed her eyes, the chance she wouldnt reopen them increased.
She is indeed. Rod sat next to the bed and took Mom G.s hand in his. Olivia, my dear. Im glad to see you. I came by early yesterday but you were sound asleep.
Mom G. smiled and her eyes glowed with affection. Rachel swallowed back the sadness that threatened to choke her. Mom G. and Rod obviously cared for one another, but now Mom G.s illness was robbing them of their happiness.
Timesshort, Mom G. said softly. Theres much to do.
Rod nodded. Yes, Olivia. Itll all work out, dont you worry.
Rachel had no idea what they were talking about, and felt like an intruder.
Rachels
Here, Rod interjected.
Mom G. shifted her gaze and Rachel stepped forward. Im right here.
Shes all grown up, Rod. All grown up.
Rachel savored the motherly words, tucking the tender feelings they evoked away in her heart for safekeeping.
Rod grinned. That she is, my dear. And a doctor, to boot.
The praise in Rods voice pleased Rachel.
For a brief space of time, Rod and Mom G. silently communicated. Rachel watched, growing decidedly uncomfortable. The look in Rods eyes as he gazed at Mom G. was more than affection.
He loved her.
A funny ache throbbed within Rachels chest.
She refused to call it yearning.
But even if it was, she wasnt stepping off Gods chosen path for her life. No matter what the cost to her heart.
Wanting to give Mom G. and Rod some privacy, and needing a moment to cool her thoughts, Rachel went to the window. The dew on the needles of the pines glinted in the sunshine like little teardrops.
Rachel, would you mind getting me a cup of coffee? Rod asked.
Not at all. Rachel headed for the door, grateful for the task.
Cream and sugar, Rod called after her.
She stopped at the nurses station and smiled at the four nurses who bustled about. Where could I get a cup of coffee?
Ill get you one, said a red-haired nurse who looked vaguely familiar.
Do I know you? Rachel tried to remember where shed seen the striking woman.
The nurse smiled. My names Jamie. You were in my older brothers class. Bob Forbes.
Okay, I remember him. She smiled back, remembering the red-haired boy whod been the class clown.
Ill be right back with your coffee, Rachel. Jamie walked away.
Cream and sugar, too, please, Rachel called after the retreating nurse.
It was strange being in a place where people knew her. Not the doctor shed become but the girl shed been. That girl was gone, replaced by the professional woman who knew exactly what her life was meant to be. Giving hope and health to those who needed it. She never pretended to think she could save their minds or their souls. That wasnt her calling.
But their bodies she could fix by making sure the care in the E.R. was better so no one else would needlessly lose a mom. Yet a wave of helplessness swept through her. The one person most important to her needed her skills as a doctor and she didnt know howShe cut that thought off abruptly. Shed find a way to help Mom G. She had to.
Dr. Kessler came down the hall. Dr. Maguire.
Dr. Kessler came down the hall. Dr. Maguire.
She tensed. Doctor.
I was hoping to see you before I made my rounds. We found some chaparral tea.
Good. It may be a long shot but it was all she had.
You realize the use of this tea is only effective when used regularly over a period of time.
She shot him a hard glare. She didnt need the reminder that time was an issue. Im well aware of the situation, Doctor.
She gritted her teeth against the gentle, pitying look in his eyes.
Here you go. Jamie sailed up and handed her a disposable cup. Steam billowed from the milky, brown liquid.
Thank you, Jamie. Doctor. She headed back to Mom G.s room. She opened the door and slowly walked in, hovering just inside the room. Her throat tightened. Rod leaned in close to Mom G., still holding her hand. They talked in quiet tones. Rachel stepped back, intending to give them more time, but her elbow bumped the wall, making a dull thud. Rod glanced at her, and the corner of his mouth lifted before he turned back to Mom G.
Rachel continued forward. As she approached the bed, she heard Rod say, I will do my best, my dear. I promise.
Mom G. nodded. We have to try.
Rod stood. Heres Rachel, back just in time. I have to take off, but Ill return this evening.
Your coffee.
Thank you. He took the cup and walked from the room.
Such a nice man. Mom G. stared after him.
He is. Rachel lifted a brow. You and Rod have become close. You never said anything in your letters or phone calls.
Mom G. smiled slightly and a blush brightened her pale cheeks. Rachel laughed, loving the life shining from Mom G.s eyes. If only she could hold on to that.
Wheres Josh? Mom G. asked.
Rachel sat in the chair. He said hed be here.
Mom G. took her hand. Im going to rest until he arrives. Please wake me.
Of course.
Mom G. closed her eyes. Rachel listened, thankful Mom G. breathed easier than she had earlier, but she couldnt shake the fear Mom G. might not reawaken.
Dropping her head onto the side of the bed, Rachel squeezed her eyes shut. Lord, Your word says to count it all joy when we fall into various trials. This sickness is a trial that affects so many people. Mom G., Rod, Josh, me. Wheres the joy, Lord? Show me, teach me. I dont understand.
The low beeping of the machines, combined with Mom G.s soft breathing, lulled Rachels senses. Heart heavy with concern, she allowed herself to rest.
Josh pushed opened the door to Mrs. G.s hospital room and stepped in. He stopped short when he saw Rachel sitting in the chair, her body bent forward and her head resting against the blue covers of the bed. He could see the steady rise and fall of the blankets over Mrs. G.
They were both resting. He started to leave, but found himself staring into Rachels crystal-blue gaze. She straightened and her black hair brushed loosely across her shoulders. She wore the clothes hed seen her in yesterday. She hadnt left and he doubted shed had more than a few moments of rest.
She blinked several times. Hi, she said softly.
She sounded young and vulnerable, more like the girl hed known. His heart twisted with longing. He pushed the unwanted emotion aside and told himself he felt sympathy for her for what was to come. Nothing else. Wheres my dad?
He left.
Josh frowned. We came together, but he sent me to get coffee for him.
Rachel smiled ruefully. With cream and sugar.
Yes. He smiled and held out one of the cups in his hand. I brought you one, too.
She stood and took the cup from him. Her hands shook slightly.
Have you eaten? He didnt appreciate the sudden need to take care of her.
No. She sipped from the coffee cup.
He watched her press the cup to her mouth. He remembered kissing those lips so many years ago. Remembered her soft, pliant mouth beneath his, the way shed felt in his arms.
Angry at the unwanted course of his thoughts, he averted his gaze. You shouldnt drink that on an empty stomach. Why dont we go to the cafeteria and get some breakfast?
She shook her head. She wanted me to wake her when you got here.
Even though Mrs. G. lay a few feet away, being this close tothis intimate withRachel troubled him. It was too easy to remember the past, to remember how hed once loved her, how shed looked at him with love in her blue eyes. Too easy to remember that shed wanted to be a doctor more than shed wanted to be with him. And being a doctor had changed her. The woman standing before him set his nerves on edge.
Ill let you do the honors. He took her cup and set it, along with his own, on the side table.
Rachel lay a hand on Mrs. G.s shoulder. Mom G., Josh is here.
Mrs. G. stirred. Her eyelids fluttered.
Joshs chest tightened. Mrs. G. had been such a godsend to him and his family. Theyd kept in touch after Rachel left town, and when Andrea died, Mrs. G. had insisted on keeping Griff while Josh had dealt with the funeral arrangements. Then shed insisted on continuing to care for his son while he worked. Shed become the grandmother that Griff needed.
And now they were losing her. Josh didnt know if his heart could take much more loss, and he worried what the loss would do to his son.
Mrs. G.s eyes opened fully and she smiled weakly. Thank you, Josh, for coming.
Josh moved closer. Of course Im here. Ill always be here, he said softly. From the corner of his eye he saw Rachel glance at him.
Were both here, Mom G., she said softly.
Mrs. G. lifted her hand from the bed and held it out. Rachel immediately wrapped her own hand around Mrs. G.s.
Josh. Mrs. G.s intent was clear. He hesitated before he slowly lifted his own hand and placed it over Rachels. He kept his gaze trained on Mrs. G. and ignored the cool hand beneath his palm.
I need a promise fromyou both.
He glanced at Rachel. Her gaze met his. The wariness in her eyes reflected his own. Whatever Mrs.G. wanted, they would do everything in their power to make it happen.
As if shed heard his thoughts, Rachel nodded imperceptibly and turned to Mrs. G. Yes, of course, well promise you anything.
Of course. Josh murmured his agreement.
His brows drew slightly together as he met the older womans gaze. A mischievous glint twinkled in Mrs.G.s eyes. Josh dismissed it as a trick of the light. Then she said, Promise me that you two will take care of each other when Im gone.
Josh stilled. Mischief nothing, the woman was bent on matchmaking! And hed just given his word hed do anything for her.
He hoped that wasnt a mistake hed come to regret.
Chapter Four
Dismay sat heavy on Joshs chest, but he saw the fledgling hope in Mrs. G.s expression and determination set in. He would do anything it took to fulfill her dying wish.
Hers would be one grave he wouldnt stand over with regret.
His gaze slid to Rachel. A slow red stain spread over her cheeks. She shook herself, glanced at him with wide, panicked eyes and then began to sputter, Mom G. IcantYou cant possibly expect
Josh tightened his fingers around Rachels.